Chapter Nineteen
To say he was shocked by Brandon’s confession was an understatement. But this was no time to dwell upon it, not when Brandon’s mouth opened beneath his, needy, wet, and searching, and his hard body molded itself with Tash’s. As their breaths merged and their teeth clashed against one another, they tore at each other’s clothes and soon lay naked and entwined on the fluffy rug. Brandon straddled him, his heavy cock warm against Tash’s thigh, a solemn look on his face.
“You still want me?”
“I never stopped.” Tash hated hearing the anxious uncertainty in Brandon’s voice. “I never could.” He slid his hand behind Brandon’s neck and pulled him in for another deep, searching kiss, leaving both of them breathless and shaking. The taut muscles of Brandon’s shoulders rippled under Tash’s hands.
“Do you really think—” Brandon began to speak, but Tash cut him off with another dizzying kiss.
“No more thinking for tonight. You’ve been caught up in so much pain and fear your entire life, more than anyone should ever have to live through.” Tash rolled onto his side, holding Brandon in his arms. “When was the last time you let go and lived in the moment, taking enjoyment only for yourself?”
“I haven’t been happy since I was a child. Not till I met you.”
Tash found himself smiling. “Then let me make you happy now.” He threw his leg over Brandon’s hip, forcing their erections up against one another. Brandon’s eyes grew wide, then hazy with his burgeoning desire.
“Tonight is a night for feeling, not thinking.” Tash sat up and held out his hand. “Come upstairs with me. Tomorrow we’ll deal with reality, but right now, forget about everything except you and me and how I’m going to make love to you so hard you won’t remember your own name.”
Brandon slipped a hand in his, and together they walked up the stairs. The house stood hushed as if holding its breath, waiting for some momentous occurrence to take place. They paused as they reached the top of the stairs, and Brandon put a staying hand on Tash’s shoulder.
“You know, you said you loved me downstairs.” The luminous expression Brandon now wore had chased the sadness from his eyes. “Yet you didn’t ask me how I felt.”
“I don’t want you to be pressured to respond the same way. You have me for as long as you want me.”
Brandon’s smile faded. “What? You think I don’t have the same feelings for you?”
Being so young, Brandon might mistake his newly awakened desire for love, but it could easily be lust as well. “I know you care for me. I think you’re confused and at a crossroads right now. I’m here for you, no matter the outcome.” Tash drew Brandon close and kissed him. “I don’t want to waste time talking when we could be doing other things.” Tash held Brandon around his waist. “I want to do unspeakable things to you.”
The fire in the depths of Brandon’s eyes spurred Tash to action. “Let’s go take a shower.” Hand in hand they entered the bedroom and walked through to the connecting bathroom. Tash turned on the tap, sending hot water rushing from the rainfall showerhead. He turned the wall jets on so that there was heated water spraying at them from every direction.
They stood together, the water streaming over their bodies. Tash squirted some liquid soap onto his hand and spread it over Brandon’s chest, massaging it until the bubbles sparkled under the water. He smoothed the soap all over himself, then Brandon, briefly massaging the man’s back, ass cheeks, and stiff cock. With every swipe of Tash’s hand and brush of his fingers, Brandon rocked his hips into Tash’s pelvis. His head dropped onto Tash’s shoulder.
“God, yeah, that feels amazing,” he said, his lips against Tash’s neck.
“I’ve only begun the night.” Tash rinsed them both and turned off the water. “Let’s get into bed and warm up. I’ll set a fire.”
One of the reasons he’d bought the house was the wood-burning fireplace in the bedroom. It cut down on his heating bill, but on a night like this, his only thought was to see the firelight flickering over Brandon’s beautiful body.
Brandon had settled under the covers by the time Tash had finished lighting the fire. The delicious smell of the wood drifted through the air. He dived underneath the comforter, relishing Brandon’s naked body. As the fire heated the room, he drew back the bedcovers, exposing them both to the rapidly warming air.
“I’m going to make love to you all night until you forget that there’s a tomorrow.”
Brandon lay still, the absolute trust in his eyes almost breaking Tash’s heart. No one had ever looked at him that way. When they kissed, their tongues met, licking and teasing each other. Tash broke away from Brandon’s lips, sliding his mouth along the fresh-tasting skin of Brandon’s throat. He stroked at the visible pulse pumping at Brandon’s neck and sucked at the tender skin beneath Brandon’s jaw.
Tash licked a lazy slide down the planes of Brandon’s chest and flicked his tongue against Brandon’s dark red nipples. He traveled down Brandon’s torso to circle his belly button, then nibbled at the edge of Brandon’s neatly trimmed groin.
“Tash, please.” Brandon moaned, his eyes squeezed tight, his hands twisting at the bedsheets.
Tash licked around the head of Brandon’s cock, flicking his tongue in the tiny slit. He loved the warm, clean scent of Brandon’s body. “Please what?” The firelight gilded their bodies, the dancing flames flickering and casting shadows on the walls. They were cocooned within their own cave of intimacy.
“Please, more?” He took Brandon into his mouth, engulfing the fully hardened length of him. The taut muscles of Brandon’s thighs quivered under his cheeks and fingertips as Tash slid his mouth up and down Brandon’s shaft, and swirled his tongue around the head of Brandon’s cock. His saliva mingled with the salty-sweet taste of Brandon’s precome, and Tash hummed with satisfaction at the delicious taste.
Small sighs and groans from Brandon’s kiss-swollen lips spurred Tash on. He reached to cup Brandon’s balls, hefting them in his palm, then slid a wet finger behind Brandon’s sac, tracing a circle around Brandon’s tight hole before teasing the entrance to the tight passage. He remained busy sucking and licking Brandon’s cock.
“God, yeah, more.” Brandon hissed.
Tash let go of Brandon’s cock to kiss a trail down to where his fingers entered Brandon’s body.
“Remember, I said I wanted to kiss you all over.” He licked and rolled Brandon’s balls. “Turn over, sweetheart.”
“What?” Brandon blinked, seemingly confused, as he raised himself on one elbow. “Turn over?”
Tash grinned. Baby, you have no idea how your mind is about to explode. “Yeah, go on. I promise; you’re going to be fine.”
Without further questioning, Brandon lay on his stomach, giving Tash a view of his firm, rounded ass. Tash braced himself over Brandon, kissing the smooth soft skin of his shoulders, tracing his spine with the tip of his tongue from the nape of Brandon’s neck to his tailbone.
Twin dimples adorned the top of each buttock. The man’s ass was as adorable as his face. After pressing a kiss to each cheek, Tash slid down on the mattress and spread Brandon wide, getting a full view of his perfect little hole. He leaned over and swiped his tongue over the crease of Brandon’s ass, coming to settle the point of his tongue in the opening. As he expected, Brandon stiffened.
“What the hell?” His voice shook with shock.
Without any comment or hesitation, Tash slid the tip of his tongue inside Brandon’s hole. The tight opening around his mouth quivered, and Tash held on as Brandon, obviously awash in sensations, spread his legs wider, encouraging Tash with his harsh cries. Tash reached deep within Brandon’s passage, jabbing in and out, his hands holding on to the globes of Brandon’s ass to steady them both. Brandon worked himself on Tash’s tongue faster and harder. Tash continued to lap and lick at his opening as Brandon’s breathy moans escalated in the darkness.
With one last lick and nibble of Brandon’s round ass, Tash lovingly kissed his way up Brandon’s back and nuzzled his face in the curve of Brandon’s shoulder. Brandon shuddered, and Tash whispered in his ear, “You liked that, sweetheart, huh?” Tash grasped Brandon under the chest and turned Brandon’s head toward him. Their mouths met in a clash of lips and tongues, the kiss messy and wild, their mutual desire escalating out of control. This night was for Brandon, to give him the pleasure he’d never enjoyed and show him how important he was to Tash, how much Tash needed and wanted him. “I want you to fuck me.”
Brandon stilled and turned over so they faced each other. “You do?” His dark green eyes shone soft and luminous. “I’ve thought about it, dreamed about what it would feel like to be inside of you.”
Tash dipped his head down and pressed his lips to Brandon’s. “I like it both ways. You should see if you do too.” As he spoke, Tash sank a finger into Brandon’s passage, loving the way the suede-silk heat sucked him deep inside, surrounding him in its tight warmth. He added a second finger and began to steadily pump them in and out of Brandon’s ass. “You’re a beautiful bottom. I love feeling you underneath me, taking me inside your tight body.” Tash withdrew his fingers and kissed Brandon. “But I want you deep inside me, becoming part of me. Do you want that too?”
There was no hesitation this time. Brandon nodded, and Tash took the condom and lube he’d placed on the night table and handed them to Brandon. “Here.”
Their hands touched as Brandon took the items, and Tash held on to him for a moment. “Don’t overthink it.”
A brief smile, then Brandon unsnapped the bottle, and Tash didn’t have to wait long. Brandon slid down the bed to sit between Tash’s knees.
With a sureness Tash hadn’t expected, Brandon’s long fingers, cool with liquid, touched him. First one finger slid inside, then two, reaching, stretching him, then hitting that magical spot to send a shower of sparks through Tash, wiping away the sting of the initial entry.
He’d forgotten what it felt like to be touched, to be loved. “Oh God,” Tash cried out, tears springing to his eyes. Years. It had been years since he’d experienced the pleasure-pain of lovemaking so intense and soul-deep it choked him.
“Did I hurt you?” Brandon stopped the magic his fingers worked inside of Tash, his voice anxious with concern.
“No,” gasped Tash. “Don’t stop. Ever.” He reached up to grab Brandon close. “Don’t stop touching me, please.”
“You want more, huh?” Brandon teased and resumed his wicked, twisting fingers.
Tash pushed himself into Brandon’s hand, shameless in his need to climb the heights his body so desperately craved. “Yes. Please.” He almost didn’t recognize his own desperate voice.
Through the haze surrounding his mind, Tash heard Brandon open the condom package, and finally, the marvelously thick head of Brandon’s cock pushed inside him.
Never in his life had he been so greedy to claim his lover. He lifted his legs and encouraged Brandon to continue the slide inside; and when he did, the fullness only increased his hunger.
It was life-affirming. Sensation washed over him, rolling through his body in great waves of pleasure, and he reveled in it. “Harder,” he begged, afraid Brandon’s inexperience and fear that he might be hurting Tash would cause him to be too tentative. “All the way in, sweetheart. You won’t hurt me.”
Brandon pushed in and withdrew halfway, then plunged back again. They rocked together, harder and faster, and with each slide and thrust, the remnants of Tash’s tattered heart knitted back together, creating a new and beautiful mosaic.
“Now, yes.” Tash locked his ankles behind Brandon and heaved himself up. The angle shifted, and as Brandon hit his gland over and over again, the slow burn within Tash ignited to a searing flame. His entire body tightened, the ache within his balls grew deep, and his vision narrowed to a pinpoint of black. Tash found it difficult to draw a breath, and he came harder than he ever had before in his life; stream after stream of creamy white shot onto his chest. His entire body trembled and shook as his orgasm rocketed through him.
Brandon continued to pump inside him, gripping Tash’s arms so tight his fingers dug into the muscles of Tash’s biceps. He stiffened, then shook and came with a hoarse cry, buried deep inside Tash. Heedless of the sticky mess all over Tash’s chest, Brandon rested there, his heart galloping in a crazy beat.
Several moments passed before they picked their heads up and, in unison, smiled at one another. Tash cupped the nape of Brandon’s neck and drew him in for a prolonged kiss. They rolled on their sides but still clung together, their kisses leisurely now that the lovemaking had taken the edge off their hunger for one another.
Brandon withdrew, and Tash winced. He waited as Brandon left the bed and went into the bathroom, wondering how Brandon felt. Sated and replete with the most marvelous ache in his body, Tash closed his eyes and stretched.
“You look like one of your cats after they get up from napping in the sun.” Brandon grinned down at him, his eyes soft and dark in the firelight.
“Come lie down with me.” Tash patted the bed next to him. “Tell me how you feel.”
Brandon slid in next to him and lay on his back facing the ceiling. “It’s weird, you know? When I lived on the streets, and even in the shelter, I’d never imagined I’d ever be in this position.”
“What position is that?” Tash lay on his side, his chin propped in his hand. He reached over to push Brandon’s hair out of his face. He frowned at the sight of worry lines etching their way across Brandon’s normally smooth forehead and traced them with a fingertip.
“Secure. Happy. And now that it’s all within reach, it’s like that dream where you’re running, and you go to grasp something, but it’s either right out of reach or it slips through your fingers.” Brandon caught Tash’s hand in his and laced their fingers together. “I found you only what seems like moments ago. I don’t want to lose what we have.” He lifted their joined hands to brush them against his lips. “And I’m not only talking about the sex, even though it’s amazing. I don’t want to run anymore. I want to stay and put down roots. I want that happily-ever-after life together, the sharing of our days when we get home from work, and having our families all together for the holidays.” He slanted a quick look up at Tash.
“What is it?” Tash sensed there was something Brandon wasn’t saying. “You have to know I want that too.”
“I was thinking about how it would be to really be a family. Maybe someday have kids together.”
Stunned, Tash could only stare at Brandon as the clock on the fireplace mantel ticked busily away.
“I understand if you don’t. I’m not saying we need to decide right now—”
Tash covered Brandon’s mouth with his in a hungry, possessive kiss. The need to touch Brandon had never been so great. “No one’s ever loved me enough to want to stay and build a home with me, so I’ve never talked about it, but children?” He kissed Brandon again. “It would be the dream I never thought I’d get to live. And you’d be an amazing father; I’ve never seen anyone so good with kids before. It must be because you’re so young.”
Brandon groaned. “Don’t start that again, please. I thought we were past all that.” His mouth set in a hard line. “Besides, at this point I have bigger things to think and worry about than our age difference.”
“I think you should tell everyone at tomorrow night’s dinner at Esther’s.” Tash pulled Brandon close to hold him. “Ash will be there, and Luke needs to know as well. Everyone will support you. You were young and abused and didn’t mean to do it.”
That look of trust reentered Brandon’s eyes. “I love you, Tash. Thank you for believing me.” He laid his head down on Tash’s shoulder. “Believing in us.”
Tash kissed his cheek. “I love you too. You made me believe in myself again when I doubted everything, sometimes my own reason for living. You gave me back my life and made it so much richer than I ever thought possible.” Tash cupped Brandon’s face between his hands. “How could I not believe in you?”