Chapter 28 #2
He looked down at the tube for a moment before meeting my eyes again.
“No. I hid it in the back of the drawer in your kitchen, behind the foil and baggies. I hope you don’t mind, but I didn’t want you to feel pressured, and I wanted to make sure we had it.
” His voice dropped. “I won’t risk hurting you. ”
Oh, Liam. Love filled my racing heart, warmth spreading everywhere. I grabbed his shoulders and kisssed him, moaning into him with desperation. His cock was digging into my stomach like this, but that was fine. How could it be anything but fine—better than fine—when he was so thoughtful?
He held my face in his hands, forcing my eyes to his. “You with me, Firefly?”
“Yes, I promise. It’s just you and me, and I want you so badly.”
Liam’s eyes flared. He opened the packet and slid the condom on, then he squeezed lube onto his fingers and fisted his cock, spreading it around. I couldn’t tear my eyes away, my insides all aflutter.
“Are you ready for me, Firefly? I don’t want to hurt you. Can I touch you?”
Nope. I was beyond ready, and I wasn’t taking any chances.
I lifted up, fitted myself over him, and slowly lowered.
Damn, he was big. Thank God for that lube.
I rocked my hips, sinking down, the slight sting barely registering over the delicious pressure of him filling me. So incredibly full. “Liam!”
“Easy, Firefly. Nice and slow.”
“I…oh…it’s good.”
“Fuck, Firefly, you feel amazing,” he rasped, his voice rough and raw. I rocked over him, and his hands came up, grabbing my breasts, playing with my nipples, but the muscles and veins popping out along his forearms betrayed how much he was holding himself back.
No way. The only thing I wanted—more than the way he filled me, more than the dizzying heat of him—was to make him fall apart with me. I wanted him enthralled, overwhelmed, lost in pleasure. Undone.
It would be beautiful, and I knew he’d still take care of me. Always.
I wanted to take care of him too. Needed it.
I gripped his chest, clawing for purchase, and rocked faster, slowly rising and quickly dropping down, feeling him deeper and deeper inside me, hitting a place I didn’t know existed. A magical place.
“Jenna!” His guttural shout, primal and needy, vibrated through me. “Firefly, tell me you’re good,” he gritted. “You feel so fucking incredible. Tell me it’s good for you, too.” He held me, the fire in his eyes searing into mine.
“Oh God, Liam!” A garbled cry came from my throat. “Yes! So good!”
He thrust up into me as I rocked over him, our bodies in perfect unison. A dance. A beautiful, exquisite dance, the sounds of our pants and groans and moans and our bodies slamming together the music, and my God, it was amazing.
My body thrummed, and I was right on the edge of that crescendo, euphoria so close, but not close enough. “Liam,” I cried out. “More!”
His fingers dug into me, his thrusts faster. Harder. Wilder.
Undone.
I fell apart. And Liam fell apart with me.
When I eventually came back to awareness, enveloped in his arms, I wasn’t quite myself anymore. Like the very molecules of my being truly had come apart and settled back into something different. Something better.
A little while later, after I’d pried myself out of bed and we’d washed up, Liam sat on the edge of my bed, wearing his jeans but no shirt, watching me fidget with stuff. I’d never in my life folded my clothes before putting them in my hamper, but for some reason, tonight I did.
“I really want to stay with you, but it's your choice,” Liam said carefully.
“I want you to sleep here with me.”
“If I do anything you don’t like or you change your mind, even if it's the middle of the night, you can tell me.”
“I know.”
“You’re nervous.” It wasn’t a question, and he wasn’t wrong.
I shrugged. “I really want this, and I want it to be good for both of us. But I can’t control my subconscious when I’m asleep. I have nightmares sometimes.” And he’d already been in one, but I’d never tell him that. “I’m nervous that if I freak out, it’ll make things weird.”
“C’mere, Firefly.” He patted the bed next to him, and Thor jumped up.
“He wasn’t talking to you.” I gently nudged Thor aside and sat, leaning into Liam and feeling some of the tension fade.
He wrapped his arm around me, holding me to him. “This has been incredible, but it doesn’t magically change everything. I love you just as you are, Jenna, and I’ll be as patient as I need to be. You need to give yourself the same grace.”
“I do feel changed, though, and I want to be able to give you everything.”
“You are, Firefly. Your trust and love is everything. I know that if you have a hard time, it’s not about me. Letting me in to work through it with you is everything. That doesn’t mean I expect everything to go easily. Whatever happens tonight is okay.”
“Thank you,” I whispered.
“You never need to thank me for loving you.” He pressed a kiss to my temple. “I’d like to sleep on the outside, if that’s okay with you. Not that there’s anything to worry about, but I always want to be between you and the door.”
Warmth filled me, overshadowing my nerves as I tried to imagine us in bed like that. Would I feel trapped? No, I thought—hoped—I'd just feel protected. “Okay.”
“I’ll face away from you, and if you want to snuggle, you can be the big spoon.”
“I’m sure you’ll move in your sleep. However you’re comfortable is fine.”
“Jenna,” he said softly. “I’ll probably have an erection at some point during the night. I’m going to keep it aimed away from you.”
“Oh.” I wanted to say it didn’t matter, but honestly, if I felt that in my sleep, I didn’t know how I’d react.
“I promise, I’ll keep it away from you while you’re sleeping, and I’ll never do anything you don’t want.”
“I know. I trust you completely.”
“Good. Let’s get in bed, Firefly. I’m exhausted and I’m sure you are too.”
I was. I crawled under the covers and into the corner where I usually slept anyway.
“Do you mind if I sleep in just my boxers?”
“That’s fine.”
He took his pants off, folded them, and put them on my dresser. “Lights off?”
“Yeah, I have a nightlight that will go on automatically.”
He turned off the lights and came under the covers, lying on his back, only his head turned toward me. “Goodnight, Firefly. I love you.”
“I love you too, Liam.” And I loved having him here. I loved having sex with him. I loved everything about this night—and this man.
Liam rolled away from me and in that tiny bit of space, a niggle popped into the back of my mind, reminding me that not everything was perfect.
I was playing a dangerous game keeping information from him, but I pushed those thoughts away and scooted closer, right up against his back, kissing his shoulder and wrapping my arm around him. I wasn’t letting Snake Eyes ruin today.