Chapter Five
Bre sat at the breakfast table with Jonah and some of the other men who were lingering in the kitchen, talking while they ate.
Tony had been there when they’d first come down.
He’d greeted them both then given her a calculated look when only Jonah had responded.
She couldn’t shake the feeling Tony was up to something.
She took her time eating. Jonah always made sure she had plenty of food.
Something she appreciated. Absence of memory didn’t mean she was unaware of how underfed she’d been when she’d first arrived here.
She’d been starved, beaten, and stripped of her memories then tossed out to create chaos.
But those who’d dumped her had failed. They’d thrown her to the one person they’d never intended to.
Her mate. She glanced over at Jonah where he chatted with another male he’d introduced as Drake.
As if her mate felt her eyes on him, he turned and dropped a kiss on her lips. When she merely blinked at him, he smiled and nudged her plate back toward her.
“Eat.”
A clearing throat brought her gaze to Tony. He wasn’t looking at her, though. His gaze was firmly on Jonah.
“Jonah. My office now.”
Tony didn’t stay to see if her mate followed his order. He knew Jonah would.
“I’ve got to head to the medical center,” Drake said, standing. “There’s some research Tony asked me to take a look at with Professor Mueller before he leaves with his daughter and her mates.”
“Do you want to go back to our room?” Jonah asked her once Drake had left them alone.
“I’ll wait here for you.” She wouldn’t let Tony’s interruption send her running. She was done hiding. She might not want Tony’s help, but she had her mate. Jonah wanted to show her more of the area. He was adamant about her getting fresh air. He was big on anything he deemed good for her.
“I’ll be as quick as I can,” Jonah promised then dropped a kiss atop her head before following in the direction Tony had gone.
She wasn’t sure how long Jonah had been gone when she heard the hint of a brogue as a male spoke softly with a female. She didn’t pay attention to what they were saying but knew they were heading her way.
The female headed to the fridge, pulling open the door and grabbing a couple of water bottles before passing one to the male.
She was petite but wore the aura of a warrior all the same.
Her long hair was worked into a braid hung over one shoulder.
The male with her was taller, his dark red hair spilled in waves to his shoulders and a darker shade of stubble covered his face, giving him a rugged look.
“Murphy.”
They both turned to face her as he took the bottle from the woman’s hand, making Brenna aware she’d said his name aloud. She’d known he was here, had seen him along with Finn when she’d first arrived. He’d given her space, though. Finn hadn’t.
“Brenna.” He swallowed, and his mate—Bre scented the bond on them—took the water back before he dropped it. “I didn’t realize you were here. I’m not… I didn’t…”
“They beat you. I thought they’d killed you. I cried for weeks.”
He shook his head, and tears filled his green eyes.
Eyes the same color as hers. Hair the same shade as hers.
Shadows of the past crept in like puffs of smoke, teasing at her senses, filling her mind with glimpses and voices.
More than once she’d heard how much she and Murphy looked alike though Finn was her twin.
More memories linked to the brothers she wasn’t sure how to feel about.
“You left me.”
Murphy shook his head. “They sent us away, Brenna. We didn’t have a choice. You remember what they did to us?”
She nodded, standing but keeping the table between them. “She was dead. Left in the yard with no regard. I lost her. I lost you. I lost Finn.”
Murphy shook his head. “You didn’t lose us, lass.”
“You left!” she yelled at him as rage filled her. “You left, and they took me away. They took me away, and you never came for me. You never came for me!”
“Brenna, I—”
“Where were you?”
“I—”
“Where were you?” She screamed the words at him, fists clenched tightly at her sides as horror washed through her. She’d suffered. They’d hurt her over and over again, and no one had come for her. No one.
People flew into the room. More than she’d seen before that moment. It was too much. There were too many people, and none of them were there for her. She pressed herself against the wall.
She let out another scream, this one of pure rage. She’d fight. She’d claw and scream and kill if she had to, but she wouldn’t let them take her again. She wouldn’t let them take her. She was alone. So alone.
She shook her head as past bled over present.
Faces and bodies changing as she blinked.
Concerned glances became lecherous grins became concern again.
The kitchen appliances morphed into lab equipment then back to what they were.
She couldn’t breathe. Her vision blurred.
She was going to pass out. She couldn’t lose consciousness.
There was no telling where she’d wake up if she did.
What they’d do to her while she was unaware.
“Breathe, love. Breathe.”
“Jonah.” She clung to him, burying herself against his chest as sobs spilled from her.
She’d sworn she’d never cry again, never give them the satisfaction of knowing they’d broken a part of her.
This wasn’t them, though. She had to remember that.
This was her mate. The only person she could count on to protect her. Jonah.
“Where were you?” she whispered, her throat ravaged from the screams that had been ripped from her soul. “Where were you?”
“I’m here. I’ve got you. I’m sorry, love. I’m so sorry.”
“Don’t leave me. Don’t leave me again.”
“Never. I swear it.”
“Is she—” Tony. His words were cut off by her mate.
“Get out,” Jonah snarled.
“Jonah.” She recognized Mitch’s voice and heard the warning in it.
“You think I don’t know he’s behind this. He pulled me from my mate then what? Finn wasn’t available for another round, so you tricked Murphy into coming here? Classic Tony move.”
She was weak, and they were all seeing it. She couldn’t be weak. Not again. Never again. When she forced herself to push away from Jonah’s broad chest, only a few people remained with them. Murphy and his mate. Tony and Mitch.
“I want to say something, then I’ll go,” Murphy said softly.
Tears rolled freely down his face. He made no move to wipe them away.
There was shame in his gaze, but somehow, she knew it had nothing to do with the emotion that wept from his eyes.
“They sent me away, and Finn with me. They told us if we ever came back, they’d kill you. ”
“There are worse things than death,” she murmured.
He swallowed, and more tears flowed. “I know that. I know that, and still, I wouldn’t take the chance they’d follow through on the threat to kill you.
I couldn’t. I’ve lived with that choice every day of my life and will continue to do so until I breathe my last. I was taken from you and chose to stay away, thinking I was doing what was best to guarantee your safety. ”
“I was never safe.”
“And I’ll live with that.” There was a sob in his voice, not quite expressed but not entirely bit off either. “I’ll take that blame.”
“You thought you were protecting her,” his mate said, leaning in to offer him comfort. “You’re not to blame for what they did. You were just a boy.”
“And she was my baby sister,” Murphy whispered.
The room spun, or maybe, it was just Brenna’s head as more memories washed over the present. There were screams in her head, and she knew they were hers. The pain, phantom though it was, felt real as it rippled through her body. She felt as if she were breaking apart.
Let’s begin.
She clawed at her hair, at her skin, and felt Jonah fighting to stop her.
“Stop. You’re hurting yourself.” He tried to grab her hands, to contain her, but she fought him, even as she screamed at herself to stop. But his hands became other hands. Reaching for her. Hurting her.
Let’s begin.
“Make it stop. Make it stop. Make it stop.” She chanted the words over and over again as her mate pinned her arms at her sides.
“It’s stopped,” he promised. “I’m here. I’ve got you. You’re safe. I swear, love. You’re safe.”
“Get them out!” she screamed, rolling her head against him frantically.
“Who? Get who out?” Jonah begged her, but she couldn’t answer.
“They’re hurting me. Hurting me,” she sobbed. She couldn’t stop the horror of the remembered pain that spilled from her lungs. It had soaked deep beneath her skin, so deep she’d never be able to purge it. No matter how far she ran, how loud she cried, how well she healed. It would never stop.
Let’s begin.
“No!” she begged.
Let’s begin.
“Make! It! Stop!”
Let’s begin.
Something shattered in her mind, like a wall coming down, but her body went cold, still, as if the drug she’d always been fed was back inside her, locking her down so they could do as they pleased.
Let’s begin.
“Let’s begin,” she whispered, giving in as her mind took her back to that room. The lights. The hands. The voice that always meant pain. Neverending pain.
Let’s begin.
Darkness closed around her, and she dove headfirst into the quiet it offered.