Chapter 10
Difficult Decision
Make the leap
After learning that Anton is missing, I retreat to a corner of the hotel lobby. I curl up into a ball in one of the leather chairs and let out a low whimper. I feel certain that Anton is not okay.
I sit there, crying silently, as the old wounds I was confronted with during my session with Tono Nosaka are torn open. I can’t handle losing another person I care deeply about.
“Please…” I sob. “Don’t let anything happen to him.”
I sit there reliving the fiery pain of my father’s death, convinced that Anton is facing a similar fate.
When I feel a hand on my shoulder, I nearly jump out of my skin. Pushing the unwanted contact away, I whisper harshly, “Don’t touch me!”
“I’m sorry, Miss Lane. I didn’t mean to frighten you.”
Hearing a familiar voice, I look up at Headmaster Wallace and swipe away the tears in my eyes.
He glances over in Chase’s direction. “I was informed that you are aware that Anton Durov’s whereabouts are unknown.”
My bottom lip trembles when I nod.
Holding out his hand to me, he states, “Walk with me to my office.”
I swallow down the lump in my throat and grasp his hand tightly.
Following the Headmaster to the elevator, I slump against the wall when the doors close.
Neither one of us says anything as it travels upward.
When it opens, he gestures for me to go first, then puts his hand against my back as we walk to his sparse office.
Once inside, I sink into the chair opposite his desk.
Instead of offering platitudes, he states, “I know you are worried. I am too.”
“What’s…happened to him?”
He shakes his head. “No one has heard from him since last Sunday.”
“So nobody knows where he is?”
The Headmaster looks at me thoughtfully before answering. “They traced his cellphone, but then he went silent, and no one has seen or heard from him since.”
I break out in a fresh set of tears. “Something is wrong. Seriously wrong. I can feel it.”
“I feel it, too,” he answers with a haunted expression.
“I don’t know what to do,” I whimper. “I feel so helpless knowing he might be hurt or…worse.”
“There’s only one thing we can do in moments like this.” He walks from behind his desk and kneels beside me. Taking both my hands in his, he bows his head. “God, the two of us hold up Anton Durov to you…”
Even though I’m not the praying kind, I bow my head, nodding in agreement as I listen to his prayers for Anton.
Afterward, he says “Amen” and stands up, nodding to me before returning to his desk. “Anton Durov has suffered hardships that no person should face…but he has the heart of a dragon and has survived impossible odds in the past.”
He pauses for a moment before divulging, “He was the reason I lost my eye.”
My jaw drops on hearing that revelation. Ever since I noticed the Headmaster wears a realistic prosthetic, I’ve wondered what happened to his left eye. “Was it an accident?”
He simply states, “It was a matter of life and death.”
I suck in my breath, shocked by his answer.
Meeting my gaze, he shares, “Our friendship was forged through extreme hardship. I once considered him an enemy, but in time, I came to appreciate the exceptional man he is.” He glances at the photo of his little girl sitting on the bookshelf.
“I saved his life, not knowing he would later save mine.”
I’m deeply moved by what he has shared, as mysterious as it is, and smile at him with compassion.
“Durov once shared a quote with me that anchored me while I was struggling with the death of my wife. ‘In this life, you can choose to take on the yoke of a victim or the shield of a warrior. You determine your path…’” He pauses, his expression suddenly far away.
“It helped me to move beyond my grief and become the father my daughter deserved.”
Glancing at me with a sad smile, he says, “Even now, that quote gives me solace. And it’s the reason I’m convinced Durov will make it through whatever adversity he is facing. That man is the greatest warrior I’ve ever known.”
I desperately want to believe him.
He then says with a gentle tone, “Rather than worry when you think of him, take it as a sign to offer up a prayer on his behalf.”
I nod, taking in a deep breath to calm my fears.
Headmaster Wallace chuckles. “And breathing helps, too. Nosaka taught me that.”
“You know him as well?” I blurt out.
He nods, sitting back in his chair. “I’m honored to call him my friend.”
“I had no idea the three of you were so close.”
“Indeed. I met them both when I took the Dominant Training course in LA.”
My mind is completely blown! “There’s a Dominant course?”
“Yes, Miss Lane,” he answers with a slight grin, then glances briefly at the clock on the wall. “We’ll be leaving for the airport soon. I suggest you freshen up and ready yourself for the flight. Your face and eyes are red.”
I shake my head. “I can’t possibly go now. Not when—”
Headmaster Wallace leans forward, his eyes probing me with the intensity of his gaze. “There is nothing you can do for him here. And if you know Durov, then you know he’d insist that you not miss this opportunity.”
I frown. “I don’t know…”
“Durov sponsored you because he wanted you to have the full experience. It would be a shame to waste what he has given you.” Leaning back again, he looks at me thoughtfully. “Worrying won’t bring him back any sooner. And once he returns, he would be disappointed to learn that you missed it.”
I look at him doubtfully.
His countenance noticeably changes, returning to that of my somewhat aloof headmaster. “This auction is an important part of the course, Miss Lane. It will test your ability to adapt and apply what you’ve learned so far. It will also aid us greatly in tailoring your training moving forward.”
I appreciate the value each one of these weekend auctions has for both the students and trainers, from the choice of location to the unique gathering of Dominants represented in each city.
It can’t be duplicated.
I also know if I were to stay home, I’d spend the entire weekend on the couch consumed with worry and accomplishing nothing. Recognizing the wisdom of the Headmaster’s advice, I let out a troubled sigh before announcing, “I will freshen up and ready myself for the trip.”
“Good,” he states firmly, standing up to escort me from the office. “It goes without saying that I expect you to keep everything I’ve shared between the two of us.”
Deeply touched that he’s been so open and honest with me, I’m quick to answer, “Of course, Headmaster.”
Before I leave his office, he adds with an encouraging smile, “It will make Durov proud to learn what you discover through this auction experience—when he returns.”
I glance back and nod. “When he returns.”
But as he shuts the door, I catch the shadowy concern on his face. It is then that I realize how worried he truly is.
It feels strange to stand beside my classmates while we wait to board the jet, acting like nothing is amiss when I know that Anton, the man behind the Submissive Training Center in New York, is missing.
When Beefcake attempts to get under my skin with his little barbs, I get up in his face and snap, “Grow the fuck up!”
Amethyst gives me a look of approval.
Once on the jet, I buckle in before take-off and stare out the window, consumed with visions of Anton all bloody and hurt.
Tamara interrupts my unpleasant thoughts by shoving a piece of paper and a pen into my hand. “It’s time for your guess on the destination.”
Grateful for any distraction, I cup my hand over the paper to block her gaze as I write down my answer. I then fold it several times and warn her not to peek as I hand it back.
She holds up the folded paper and waves it. “I sure hope you’re right…for your sake.”
I raise my chin when I answer confidently, “I am.”
Michelle chimes in. “Is it someplace tropical?”
“You tell me,” I answer. “You had the same hints I did.”
She laughs. “I’m terrible with geography, but I am certain of one thing.”
“What’s that?” I ask with amusement.
“The food will be amazing.”
I chuckle. “That’s guaranteed.”
Before heading to my cabin, I stop the Headmaster and ask him in a hushed tone, “If you hear anything…”
“I will send word directly.”
I meet his gaze when I confess, “I don’t know how I will sleep tonight.”
He offers me a gentle smile. “Offer a prayer on his behalf and let it go, Miss Lane.”
I nod, then hurry to my cabin when I notice Beekcake watching us together.
Once I’m safely inside, I let out the painful sob I’ve been holding in ever since I got onto the plane. Taking my time to undress and ready myself for bed to prolong the inevitable, I’m disappointed not to have my journal to read through in preparation for the auction.
Carefully laying my clothes out for tomorrow to take up more time, I lie on the bed and stare up at the ceiling. I breathe a sigh of relief when the lights finally dim and the soft relaxing music fills my cabin. “Please keep Anton safe,” I whisper in the dark.
By some miracle, I’m blessed with a dreamless sleep.
The moment the lights start to brighten, however, I’m wide awake and pop out of bed.
I dress into a light summer dress appropriate for the destination I’m sure I’ve nailed.
I am determined to fully immerse myself in the challenge of this unique auction, so that I can impress Anton with everything I’ve learned when he returns.
I will not allow myself to question his safe return.
While we’re waiting for Pixie Girl to arrive before we depart, I tell Tamara to go ahead and look at my guess before showing it to Amethyst and Michelle. She raises her eyebrows when she reads it, then passes it to Michelle.
Beefcake strides up and snatches it from Michelle’s hand before any of us can react. “Rio de Janeiro,” he calls out loudly, garnering the attention of all four instructors.
My cheeks burn with embarrassment.
“What was that, Mr. Nash?” Headmaster Wallace calls to him.
Sneering at me, he answers, “I overheard Miss Lane sharing this with some of her friends.”
Dono Marcelo turns to face me, his tone grave, “Would you like to share it with everyone?”
Even though I don’t, I answer respectfully, “If it pleases you, Dono Marcelo.”
“It does,” he retorts.
I swallow hard as I turn to face my classmates. “I believe we just landed in Rio de Janeiro.”
Nash snickers, elbowing Russo standing next to him.
“Headmaster, would you care to break the suspense?” Dono Marcelo asks.
“Certainly.” Headmaster Wallace looks at us when he announces, “The auction begins at one o’clock. You have been allotted time to explore the area with the driver assigned to you before returning to the hotel…”
I wait breathlessly, trusting I am right.
Looking directly at me, he ends with, “Enjoy Rio de Janeiro.”
The cabin erupts in cheers as we line up to leave the jet.
Nash eyes me suspiciously. “How could you possibly know that?”
Michelle laughs. “Sophie is a genius. She noticed that the appetizers they serve at the Training Center hint at our destination for the week.”
Lord Murray calls out to me, “Well done, lass. We were wondering which of you would be the first to unravel the clues.”
Mistress Kim adds, “We assumed someone would recognize the pattern and identify the location much sooner.” She then glances at me, “But well done, Miss Lane.”
I gladly accept her backhanded praise, thrilled that I named the city correctly.
Seeming impressed that I cracked the code, Carlisle starts peppering me with questions.
Dono Marcelo interrupts, “Don’t squander the valuable time you’ve been given.”
Hurrying out to the limousine, I look out the window at the breathtaking beauty of the mountainous coastline. My gaze switches quickly between the dramatic landscape and the iconic statue of Christ overlooking the entire city with his arms spread wide. I’m struck with a sense of awe by it all.
The limousine takes us to a stunning hotel which looks like a white palace set beside the crystal blue waters of Copacabana Beach.
It feels like a dream as I step out of the vehicle and walk up to the entrance.
I follow a personal steward who leads me through the dramatic marble lobby to a hallway covered in a collection of black and white photos of all of the famous celebrities who have stayed at this plush hotel.
Taking me to a corner suite on an upper floor, he smiles as he opens the door and watches for my reaction.
I stare past the spacious room, looking out at the balcony where I spot a spectacular view of the ocean.
Listening politely as he lists the many amenities of the hotel, I find I can’t take my eyes off the view.
To humor him, I take a moment to admire the original artwork of the city hung above the impressive bed, and I even smile when he points out the stunning bouquet of fresh flowers sitting on the table.
Although every detail of this room is glamorous and opulent, I am irresistibly drawn to that balcony.
The moment he leaves, I hurry out onto the spacious veranda and my skin is kissed by the ocean breeze. It feels surreal to be standing here, looking out at the outcroppings of large rock formations decorating the coast beyond the beach.
Rio is so uniquely beautiful that it has an otherworldly feel to it.
As I breathe in the freshness of the air, I feel grateful to Headmaster Wallace for insisting that I come and not miss this opportunity. Looking up at the clear azure skies, I silently thank Anton and offer another desperate plea for his quick return.