Chapter 20
20
F rightened, Anna backed away from him.
He frowned and raised his hands to embrace her again. "What is it?" When he noticed her confused expression, he gave her the space she needed. "You saw something."
She was unable to answer. Before he knew what… memory had emerged, she had to think about it herself. To come to terms with it, understand it.
"It's… I saw us. In love, on the beach." She gave him a half-hearted smile. Creases lined his forehead. He didn't believe her. He knew she was hiding something from him.
"Is there something else you want to tell me?"
She pressed her lips together as tears struggled to find their way to the surface, but she pushed them back with all her might. She urgently needed to be alone now. Without saying a word, she shook her head. She gathered her strength to make her voice sound firm. "Can I go back on deck?"
"Aye. I'll show you to your seat and…"
"No, I'll go alone."
"Aye, Ani." He stepped forward and opened the hatch for her. She barely noticed. As if in a trance, she walked past him and climbed the steps to the deck. She glanced at the crew. Some of the men pulled on the ropes, others scrubbed the deck, and Johnny and Jack boasted about the fight. When they saw Anna and the captain coming up, they immediately began to look busy. A fire blazed far off in the distance. Blackbeard's ship. It was on fire. He and his men were no longer a threat, at least for now.
Anna nodded gratefully to each of the men, who silently acknowledged it and then resumed their work. Then she stole back to the bow of the ship. She didn't lie down in the makeshift hammock because that would have meant relaxing and letting herself go, and she couldn't do that. She had to keep her strength together, her courage, her… wits. She stood at the railing and stared out at the wide sea without seeing what lay in front of her. All her thoughts were turned inward.
She had seen it. She had seen her reflection in his eyes. It was definitely her. The straight strawberry-blonde hair, freckles all over her face, blue eyes, and the wide mouth. She had worn a dress made of leaves, similar to the ones that Iris and Margerite wore, and she had been so tiny that she could sit in his hand. And on her back were large, glittering wings.
She didn't dare think about what the next step was, and just entertained the idea, ever so tentatively . The eventuality. The possibility. The absolutely incredible, unimaginable, incomprehensible, beyond mind-boggling fantasy that what everyone was saying was true.
She was a fairy.
Now she believed it. And the notion wasn't amusing like before. She wasn't dismissing the others' overactive imaginations or good-naturedly indulging others' wild fantasies. No. It was real. She considered it — no, not the thought, she considered that she truly was… a fairy.
Her heart beat faster, her hands began to shake, and her knees weakened. Chris didn't come to catch her. No one was there to support her. But she didn't want that either. She had to face this moment alone, had to allow her mind to see the impossible as possible. To see the crazy as reality.
Once again, she searched within herself. She felt nothing on her back, no pulsing force inside her, and her fingertips didn't tingle. She felt at home in this big body. If it was true… and heavens, she would consider it. If she honestly was a fairy… her heart soared as if it were rejoicing. If she was indeed a fairy, where were her magical powers?
And as if this crazy idea that she was not only a fairy but also had magical powers provided the whole thing with the necessary logic, she accepted it. She accepted the possibility — or was it something more? Not merely a possibility, but the truth? Yes, that was it. She felt it, just as she had felt that Anton was her friend and that she and Chris belonged together. And so, the certainty crept into her thoughts and lingered there as if she had never doubted it.
She was a fairy…
And her name was… Anemone.
It took a while before she ventured away from her refuge. The mood on deck was exuberant. The men sang and whistled songs that Anna had never heard before, though she was able to follow the melodies.
Laughing, Johnny came up to her, rubbing his strong hands together. "So, are you ready for a culinary masterpiece?"
Even though she wasn't hungry, she smiled. She certainly didn't want to offend the cook, but she did want to talk to Chris first.
"In a moment, I have to talk to the captain first. Do you know where he is?"
He pointed to the stern of the ship. "Where he has been for years — at the helm." Anna looked at Chris behind the wheel, his dark gaze fixed on the endless sea, exchanging a few words with Freddy. It seemed as if they were no longer at odds but conferring. Jack appeared behind them and since he was also involved in the conversation, she wouldn't disturb them while they were talking.
She climbed the steps to the aft deck. As soon as Chris saw her, his eyes gave her the smoldering look that gave her goosebumps. Freddy spotted them at the same time and his expression hardened. Did he blame her? That was her impression. Or was it his conscience that was bothering him?
Jack stepped forward and clapped her on the shoulder. She had to use all her strength not to sink to her knees in front of the pirates. "Well, Anemone? Are you okay?" His flippant manner immediately lightened the mood and she was grateful for that. Nevertheless, she definitely had to find an opportunity to talk to Freddy in private soon. But, for now, she needed to tell Chris what she had… realized.
"Everything's okay, I just want to speak to the captain in private for a moment."
"In private, h'm." Jack moved his eyebrows up and down meaningfully. "Can our captain steer the ship while doing that?"
Chris gave him a friendly slap on the arm before stepping back from the wheel. "Take over, Freddy!" He stood behind the helm without saying a word, giving her an extremely skeptical look. It was hard to bear. Apparently he thought she was a problem on board. Luckily, he hadn't betrayed her to Blackbeard. He was probably more loyal to the captain than he initially seemed.
"Come on, Ani, let's go to the forward deck." Chris took her hand, lacing her fingers in his and rubbing the back of her hand with his thumb. Did he sense her restlessness? Smiling, she walked with him. Jack's whistle followed them, causing a few of the pirates to holler. But one look from Chris was enough for all to fall silent.
As soon as the spar was in front of them, Chris leaned one arm against the rail and turned to her. "What did you see?"
He hadn't forgotten and had probably been thinking about it, and now he wanted answers. Her heart pounded excitedly. Anyone else would have thought she was crazy if they'd heard what she believed she was. Or maybe not. Probably not in this magical land. Nevertheless, it wasn't easy to shake the excitement. Her gaze traveled from the planks to the toes of her shoes until she slowly raised her gaze.
"I saw myself when…" She took a deep breath. "I have seen what I am."
His eyes widened, but he said nothing, waiting for her to say it.
"I now know I am a fairy."
A glow came over his dark face. It could have looked out of place amidst his rakish features, but it didn't. "You remembered." Happily, he took her hands and kissed them. "Everything?"
She shook her head.
"What memory did you recall?"
"I saw us both at the beach. A campfire burned and the endless stars shone above us. I sat in your hand and saw my reflection in your eyes. Me, as a fairy."
"Aye, I remember that night. You landed in my hand, transformed, and then…" He grinned, raising an eyebrow, but then his gaze changed. "Since you now know who you are, have your magical powers returned?"
She turned her hands and stared into the empty palms as if glittering fireworks would appear at any moment. But there was nothing. "Unfortunately not. I don't feel it either. But in my heart, I feel it is true."
"Aye, that's progress. But before we face the Snow Queen, it needs to be reawakened. We have to find a way."
"If only I knew how I lost it. If all my memories came back, maybe I would have some idea how to do it."
His forehead wrinkled as he ran his hand over the back of his neck. She could immediately tell that he was keeping something from her.
"What is it? What are you thinking?"
"Nothing, it…"
"Hey, the truth. Immediately! I trust you and it will only stay that way if I can rely on you to reveal everything. Do you have any idea how I lost my powers?"
He shook his head but said nothing else. It apparently was difficult for him to say what was on his mind. Anna took his hands and squeezed them gently. "You can tell me anything, Chris."
He tilted his head before laying his dark eyes on her. "There may be someone who can help you remember."
The corners of her mouth shot up and she felt euphoric, like she had won the lottery, but his serious look nipped her exhilaration in the bud. "Who do you have in mind?"
"There is a siren. Her name is Meysandrine. She is said to have the gift of sight."
"You mean seeing the future?"
"Not just the future, but other things too. The ones that are hidden from us."
"Okay, and you believe she could help me remember?"
"She might. But her answers are not always clear and rarely what you want to hear."
"That doesn't matter. Let's go see her. What do we have to lose?"
Chris ran a hand through his stubble. "I'm afraid my crew won't be happy about you taking her advice."
"Why not?"
"Because I've been to her before and her advice… well, it wasn't all that helpful."
What? "When did you see her and what did she say?"
"When you disappeared, I sailed to her. I tried everything to find you. She told me that in order to find you, I had to use all my strength to take to the heavens. Shortly after that, I dumped the fairy dust over the Fortuna and flew into the air, but the giants felt threatened and you know the rest."
She looked at him thoughtfully. "So she didn't give you good advice."
He shrugged. "It could be that I misunderstood. Considering the mutineers brought you here on my ship, you could say I succeeded."
That was true.
Meysandrine. A siren.
"Where does she live?"
"No one knows for certain. Normal sailors can't find her, but we pirates can hear her call. There's this place where I found her before. It is located in the middle of the East Sea, which is why no one has consulted a siren in a long time. A great many rocks rise from the sea and the giants' strong breath causes violent storms, so no one has sailed to it in recent years. But I managed to find her before and I'll do so again."
"Especially since Toni is trying to persuade the giants not to blow storms at us."
"Aye."
"Will it be timely? I mean, Toni is waiting for us and we can't waste any time. Who knows if all the fairies aren't already…" She left the sentence unfinished but Chris also knew what she was thinking.
"Since we're sailing through the East Sea anyway, we wouldn't need much more time. We would sail a bit further than planned and that would only take a couple of hours of sailing time at most, depending on the wind."
"That should do it. So how does it work? Does she come up through the water? Is she sitting on a rock?"
The captain laughed. "No, you have to throw a gold coin into the sea where she is. If she wants to tell you something, she appears to you in your dreams."
In a dream? She wouldn't get to meet Meysandrine in person? "Then how do you know you didn't just dream it?"
The captain smiled. "So skeptical, madam?"
"Well, for a gold coin… It sounds like a lot and you have to have one. And I don't have any with me."
"How lucky that a rich pirate would lay all his treasure at your feet."
Anna's jaw dropped. Did she understand him correctly? Of course, there were stories that pirates had great treasures, stole them, and buried them on secret islands, but she'd never thought for a second about her pirate possessing such riches. "Would you throw one into the sea for me? To Meysandrine?"
"If that is your wish. But remember, Meysandrine's prophecy is not always good. And it's not always true either. It's a gamble — you don't know if she will answer or if the prophecy will help."
"I'd still like to try."
"Aye, we'll do that."
"What about your crew?"
The captain ran his hand over the back of his neck. "We could just do it without informing them. Unfortunately, Freddy is right. I've undertaken solo actions too often in recent years and they haven't always been… smart. If I don't want a fight like the one with Freddy to happen again, I have to at least inform them of our plan and convince them that it's worth the risk."
Thinking of how much he was helping her made her smile. How could Anton have doubted him? "We'll do that."
"We?"
"Well, I’ll help you."
"Aye, you will, but first I'll help you recall more memories. Maybe we don't need Meysandrine at all." His eyes locked with hers as her fingers intertwined with his and goosebumps crawled up her spine. He pulled her to him and kissed her passionately. When he broke away, there was a smug grin on his face that made her chuckle.
He frowned in irritation. "What?"
"I guess to restore my memories, you’ll have to do more.”
The blaze reappeared in his dark eyes and he slowly moved his rough hand down her back. Then, he lifted her shirt and stroked her bare skin. Shivers coursed through her body and a guttural sound escaped her.
"Do you doubt my abilities, madam?"
A grin crept onto her face. “What if I do?"
"Then I have all night to convince you otherwise."
Anna laughed before he kissed her again. How could she have forgotten this man?