Chapter Twenty – Beck
Chapter Twenty
BECK
The moment his office door clicked shut, I started praying. Merit moved to the side of the desk, where Dirk was currently sitting, and leaned against it. It was a lovely oak desk that looked to be an antique.
“Beautiful desk,” I managed to say.
Merit crossed her arms as Dirk leaned back and steepled his fingers.
“Thank you,” he replied. “You seem to like the word beautiful, since you used the same one to describe Avery.”
Reaching up and trying to loosen my tie, I replied, “Actually, I think I said she was gorgeous.”
Dirk frowned, and I took a step back.
“No protection?” Merit asked.
Dirk’s head jerked to look at his wife. “What?”
“Wait. We did. I mean, Avery’s on the pill. It’s just…we got caught up and…” My voice drifted off, and I looked longingly at the window.
“So you did sleep with her?” Dirk stated, shaking his head slowly. “In my house.”
I held up my hands. “No! It was at the hotel!”
Merit covered her mouth and looked away. I suddenly saw her shoulders shaking.
“Mrs. Littlewood, please don’t cry!”
When she looked back at me, I had to blink to make sure I was seeing correctly.
She was laughing.
Dirk sighed and rolled his eyes. “For the love of all things, Beck, stop talking. You’re digging yourself deeper into the ground. Although, that could be to my benefit…it means the less I’ll have to dig to dispose of your body.”
“What?”
Dirk leaned forward. “In less than a minute, I got you to admit you’ve slept with my daughter, and you forgot to use protection. I ought to kill you.”
I didn’t say a word. But when I looked at Merit, she motioned for me to say something.
“Should I talk now?” I asked in a lower voice, as if Dirk really couldn’t hear me.
“Yes, Beck. You should probably tell us what your feelings are for our daughter.”
“Right. Yes. Um, well. The first thing I should say is, I tried really hard to fight my attraction for her, but that didn’t work.”
“Clearly,” Dirk deadpanned.
“I, well, I…you see…” I scrubbed my hands down my face before dropping them to my sides. “I’m just going to be honest with you. I’ve never in my life met anyone like Avery. The second she smiled at me on that plane, I felt this crazy sensation in my chest.” My hand went to my chest, and I didn’t even realize at first that I was rubbing over my heart. “I’ve never, ever felt the things I feel with Avery. I thought I was in love once…and I can’t stand here and tell you I love your daughter, because it’s only been a few days. But what I can tell you is that I care for her deeply. I feel…different when I’m with her. She makes me feel…”
Frowning, I looked down at the floor, trying to figure out the words I needed to describe how I felt when I was with their daughter.
Finally, I looked up at them and simply said, “Whole. I feel whole when I’m with her. At first, I thought I felt that way because I’d finally found my father’s family, and a part of me does feel that way when I’m with them. But it’s different. Avery has filled something else, and I don’t know how to describe it.
“I don’t know what my future holds. The Shaws have given me my father’s portion of the ranch. I laid in bed last night, and sat in my father’s room for hours today, trying to decide if I want to stay here and make a new life, or go back to Texas.”
“And have you come up with an answer that quickly?” Dirk asked.
I shook my head. “No, sir. I’m torn. And now with Avery, I’m even more confused.”
Dirk stood and walked around his desk. He leaned against the front and crossed his ankles. “What’s happening with you and Avery is new. We remember that phase,” Dirk said, looking at Merit. “I messed up big time because I was too afraid to admit how I was feeling. Your daddy isn’t here to give you advice, so I’m stepping in for him.”
Tears pricked at the back of my eyes.
“If you care for her, and she cares for you, then you’ll find a way. If she’s just something you’re attracted to physically—”
“No, sir. She’s not. I mean, I’d have to be blind not to see how beautiful, er…how stunning she is, but it’s more than physical.”
Dirk nodded. “I’m only going to ask you to do one thing. It’s something I didn’t do, and I almost lost the love of my life.”
My eyes went to Merit. “Anything, sir,” I said, as I swung my gaze back to Avery’s father.
“Don’t hurt her.”
It felt like someone punched me in the chest. All the air left my lungs, and all I could do was shake my head.
Merit walked to her husband and laced her fingers with his. “Beck, be honest with her about how you feel. About your future. She acts like she’d be okay if you left, but I think you and I both know that won’t be the case. Even this early on.”
“I don’t think I’d be okay either, ma’am.” Looking directly into Dirk’s dark eyes, I said, “I swear to you, sir, that I will never hurt her. Ever.”
I held my breath as I waited for him to say something. When he dropped Merit’s hand and pushed off the desk, I fought the urge to close my eyes and shrink back.
Clapping his hands, Dirk grinned. “Thank fuck we got that over with. Bring me that shot glass, son.”
Standing there for a few moments, I finally got my feet to move me forward. I handed Dirk the shot glasses, and he lined all four up. Pouring them to the top, he handed one to Merit and one to me before he picked up his. He raised it and said, “May you someday have a daughter of your own.”
Merit giggled.
Confused, I looked between him and Merit as they both drank the entire shot. When they looked at mine still in my hand, I quickly drank. Dirk poured us each another.
Holding up his glass, he said, “To Beck Senior. He would have been damn proud of you.”
Tears threatened to spill from my eyes, so I quickly took the shot. I went to put the glass down when Dirk shook his head. He filled up the glasses once again.
“To having our little girl back home. To Avery!”
Merit called out, “To Avery!”
“To Avery,” I said, taking the shot.
Again, I went to set the glass down, but Dirk filled it yet again.
“To Beck. Welcome home.”
Merit and I both lifted our glasses and drank.
Dirk poured another round. “To family.”
Merit and I both said, “To family.”
I held onto the glass this time, swaying slightly, as I waited for Dirk to fill it again. When he set the bottle of whiskey on his desk, he turned, spotted my glass, and frowned. “You want another shot? You don’t have a drinking problem, do you?”
“No…no, sir. I actually don’t drink that much.”
Merit hiccupped. “Oh dear.”
By the time we were walking up the steps of Brock and Lincoln’s house, I had a buzz that could rival the worst ones from my teens.
“How many shots did you do?” Avery asked.
I held up my hand to count. “One in the living room. And…” I tried to remember how many we’d done in the office. “Five more shots in your dad’s office.”
“Six shots!” Avery shouted, causing Dirk to smirk over his shoulder.
“Beck, you did six shots?”
“ Full shots,” I said, tripping over the last step.
“Daddy!” Avery growled. “How could you?”
He laughed. “Don’t worry, he’ll get rid of that buzz in about twenty seconds when the entire Shaw family rushes him.”
“What?” I said, grabbing Avery’s arm. “Did he say rushes me? What does that mean?”
Avery waved off my concern, saying, “Don’t listen to him. Try to take a few deep breaths.”
“I’m not drunk, Avery,” I said as I tripped over something else. When I looked down, I didn’t see anything.
Bradly hit my back and leaned forward a little too much, bumping into Avery, who steadied me. “You tripped over your own shoe, dude.”
“Daddy, I’m never going to forgive you for this. He’s meeting his family!”
Turning to give me a once-over, he said, “And he needed to relax a little. Your mother and I are fine, and we had the same amount of whiskey.”
It was at that moment when Merit hiccupped and giggled. “I haven’t drank that much in wong times.”
“This should be fun.” Bradly laughed.
Avery had said they’d told everyone she knew about the surprise party, so it had been changed to a welcome-to-the-family party. I thought that was pretty sweet of them.
The door opened and Brock stood there, a smile on his face. He scanned everyone quickly, then did a double take when he saw me. Of course, it could have been because I was leaning against Bradly for support.
“Jesus, what did you do to him, Dirk?” Brock asked, as he made his way out and guided me into the house.
“How was I supposed to know the kid can’t hold his liquor?” Dirk replied. We all followed Brock as he turned and headed somewhere away from all the talking.
“Because his father couldn’t hold his either!” he retorted, looking back at Dirk.
Dirk let out a roar of laughter. “Hell, that’s right! He couldn’t hold it for shit, could he?”
Brock guided me to a chair, and I sat down with a thud. He turned to Merit and asked, “Can you get him some black coffee?”
Merit laughed, then hiccupped again.
Avery sighed. “I’ll get it. She’s drunk too.”
Putting her hands on her hips, Merit said, “I am not drunk. I’m just buzzing.”
Pointing to Merit, I jumped up. “This! That! What she said.”
When I started to sway, Brock put a hand on my arm and told me to sit back down. Then he glared at Dirk. “He’s meeting the entire family, Dirk.”
“He’ll be fine. Give him some coffee and maybe ten minutes or so.”
I closed my eyes, and the voices of Dirk and Brock arguing grew distant. The last thing I heard was Bradly say, “Um…Beck’s asleep.”
The feeling of someone running their fingers gently through my hair caused me to blink my eyes open. The room wasn’t dark, but it wasn’t fully lit, either. When my sight adjusted, I saw sapphire-blue eyes looking down at me.
“Hi,” Avery whispered. “How are you feeling?”
“Like someone punched me in the head a dozen or so times.”
She smiled. “That would be the shots you took with my father and mother.”
Frowning, I asked, “How are they even standing?”
“Oh, my mother’s in the kitchen drinking black coffee and contemplating if she wants to divorce my father or not.”
I laughed, then groaned. “My head is pounding.”
Avery sighed. “You can thank my father for that.”
Slowly sitting up, I drew in a deep breath and tried to get the room to stop spinning. “Why are you in here, princess? You should be out there with your family.”
“I wanted to make sure you were okay.”
Something in my chest squeezed, but in the best kind of way. I reached for her hand. “Thank you, but I’m okay.”
“Uncle Brock is furious with my father.”
I grinned as I said, “Your dad…I don’t know if I’m afraid of him, or if I think he’s the greatest fucking guy in the world.”
“I say we go with the second one.”
Avery and I both turned our heads to see Dirk standing in the doorway.
“Did you come bringing more whiskey?” Avery asked.
My stomach lurched at the mention of alcohol.
Dirk chuckled. “No, I brought him some water and Tylenol.”
I stood and met Dirk halfway. “Water sounds amazing, thank you.”
With a smirk, he asked, “How’s the head?”
“Feels like someone hit me with a wrecking ball.”
Dirk slipped his hands into his pockets. “Don’t hold your booze very well, do you?”
I shook my head and instantly regretted it. “No, sir. Never have been a big drinker.”
“Neither was your father,” Brock said, stepping into the room. “He’d get drunk after three beers. And I don’t mean a buzz, but drunk .”
Knowing that about my father made me smile. It was odd how alike we were.
“You feel like meeting the family now? Everyone has already eaten, but my mother saved you and Avery a plate.”
“I’m so sorry. This doesn’t make a very good first impression.”
Brock and Dirk laughed.
“You’re already a hero,” Avery said. “Josh and Nathan think it’s cool you showed up buzzing.”
I rolled my eyes, and even that hurt.
“The good news is,” Brock said with a wide grin, “I talked Mom out of a surprise game night. You’ll need to be fully sober for that to happen.”
When I glanced at Avery, she nodded. “What is it about game night?”
Dirk hit the side of my arm. “You’ll find out soon enough, son.”
I wasn’t sure why I liked him calling me son so much, but I did. My grandfather had called me that my entire life. But it meant something different coming from Avery’s father. Even different than when one of my uncles said it.
Uncles.
It was strange of me to think that, but it felt right.
“You ready?” Avery asked.
Finishing off the water, I nodded. “As I’ll ever be.”