CHAPTER SIXTEEN
Agatha was found dead at her apartment.
I learned about it while checking for news online, right before I was about to leave to see Amanda. The article didn’t say much, just that she was found by her maid, and her cause of death was assumed to be suicide. I watched her smiling face for a long time. The photo was taken at a red-carpet event a few years back, long after she’d sold me to The Society. I searched deep inside myself for any sort of emotion, but found only cold apathy.
My past was rapidly dissolving around me, and it remained to be seen if I was destined for a similar fate.
The Chief called as soon as I closed my laptop. I had texted him yesterday that I'd gotten a lead from Eliot about Amanda and The Society’s motel.
I answered the call. “I’ve heard.”
He sighed. “A real shitshow this is turning out to be.”
“Someone must have seen you going to talk to her, or maybe she told the wrong people about that.”
“Either way, she’s dead. Overdosed on sleeping pills. No signs of struggle, but the security cameras in the building malfunctioned for thirty minutes last evening.”
“How convenient.”
“I’m not taking this further, Jonah. I see where this is heading, and I won’t die for this cause.”
I let his words sink in, surprised by how little effect they had. In a way, I was relieved not having to count on someone I didn’t fully trust. He could have easily fed me false information.
“I’m not stopping,” I said.
“That’s up to you. Just know I’ll deny any connection to this. But still, I wish you luck.”
There were many things I wished to tell him, but I had more important things on my mind. I hung up and hit the road on my way to madness.
*
It took me close to an hour to drive to San Bernardino, where Patton State Hospital was located. From a search I’d done online, I found out it was built in 1890 and had been referred to as “The Insane Asylum” for years. The place had been demolished after the 1923 earthquake and then rebuilt.
I had expected more traffic and ended up arriving too early. Eliot had said I should be there when the morning shift was about to finish. To pass the time, I went to eat at a small taco place. In the last few days, I’d been mostly surviving on caffeine, too stressed to eat proper meals. I suspected I’d need all my energy for what lay ahead.
When the sun showed signs of descending, I headed to the hospital, the three thousand dollars in my back pocket making walking uncomfortable. It was easy to get lost, but I’d checked in advance for the psychiatric ward location. It was a one-story gray building behind the actual hospital. I walked past security, then made my way to the reception desk, where an older woman with gray hair sat reading a magazine about knitting. She slowly raised her eyes over thick glasses. Her name tag read, “Sherlyn.”
“Hey,” I said.
“How can I help you?”
“I’m here to see a patient.”
She cocked her head like she was trying to remember if I’d been there before. “Which patient are you here to see?”
I’d been debating whether to ask to see Frank, but since he could just come out to meet me, it would make it harder to enter the ward later. “I’m here for Amanda Tulip.”
She frowned and put her magazine down. “Amanda? Are you also a cop?”
Damn. I hadn’t counted on anyone remembering Hayden’s recent visit. If I had claimed to be a cop, she would likely ask for a badge. “I’m not a cop, just an old friend.”
She leaned back and crossed her arms, watching me closely through her glasses. “I didn’t know Amanda had any friends. I’ve also never seen you here before.”
I kept my face blank. “I didn’t know she was here until recently. We lost touch.”
“I see. Well, did you get your visit cleared with her psychiatrist?”
“Um, no.”
“Only family members can see patients without clearance, and even that is not recommended.” She glanced at her magazine, clearly ready to move on from this conversation.
I cleared my throat. “But Amanda doesn’t have a family. She’s an orphan; that was where we met.”
Her face softened a bit, her eyes no longer glancing at the magazine. “I’m sorry to hear that.”
I leaned on the counter. “We all deal with the cards we’re dealt with.”
She sighed. “Ain’t that the truth?”
“Amanda and I used to talk about getting out of that place and making a good life for ourselves. I hoped she’d succeed, but then I heard she was here.”
Sherlyn nodded sympathetically. “She won’t be making a good life for herself any time soon, I’m afraid.”
“That’s a shame. I live in San Jose and thought I’d come to say hello, to let Amanda know not everyone has forgotten about her.” I looked down. “I guess it was dumb.”
“No, no. Your heart was in the right place, dear. And San Jose, you say? That’s a five-hour drive!” She glanced around, although it was clear we were alone. “I tell you what: visiting hours are almost done, but I can slip you in without all the bureaucracy. Just promise you’ll keep this between us, capisce?”
I gave her a grateful smile. “You’re a peach, Sherlyn.”
She waved her hand, slightly blushing. “Let me holler for someone to take you in. We don’t let anyone walk around unsupervised. Some of our patients can get riled up easily.”
I nodded and took a step back as she picked up the phone. If anyone other than Frank came out, this would end up being a waste of time. I couldn’t imagine slipping in again without official clearance.
“I have someone here to see Amanda,” Sherlyn said on the phone. “Amanda Tulip, you dummy—we only have one Amanda.” She rolled her eyes. “He’s waiting at the reception. Don’t keep him waiting.” She hung up. “He’ll be here in a heartbeat.”
I opened my mouth to ask who was coming, but that would’ve been suspicious. “Thanks a million.”
She smiled and returned to her magazine. I waited anxiously for the nearby iron door to open. When it finally did, a tall black man walked out. “You’re for Amanda?” He sounded ready to be done with his shift.
“Yes.”
“Come with me.”
I walked toward him and was about to read his name tag when he turned around and started walking. Annoyed, I hurried to follow him through an overly bright hallway. He walked quickly, his legs longer than mine. I almost had to jog to keep up.
“I’m Jonah,” I said.
“Hi.” He kept walking.
“Wait. I think I forgot something in my car.” I stopped and made a show of tapping my pockets.
He turned around. “What did you forget?”
I hurried to read his name tag. James. Damn it.
“Never mind.”
He raised an eyebrow. “Okay…”
We continued walking. I hoped to get through to Amanda regardless of her state, but I wasn’t optimistic. Hayden had said it was pointless. We reached another door that James needed to open with a security tag. Two men were on the other side, leaning against another reception desk and talking. James walked past them, but I slowed down to read their name tags. One was called Andy, and the other one was Frank.
I halted in front of them, causing them to stop talking. Frank appeared to be in his late forties, the owner of a beer belly and a crooked nose. His dark hair was long and unkempt.
I cleared my throat. “Hi, Frank. Haven’t seen you in ages.”
“Huh? Do I know you?”
I was painfully aware of three sets of eyes watching me. “C’mon, you remember. We met at Eliot's party.”
He narrowed his eyes. “You’ve got the wrong guy. I don’t know any Eliot.”
Well, fuck me sideways. “Sorry. I must’ve gotten you mixed up with somebody else. I’ll just head over to see Amanda Tulip.”
I returned to James, who seemed impatient. We barely took five more steps when Frank called, “Hey, wait! I remember you now. Yo, Big J, I’ll take him to see Amanda.”
James didn’t need much persuasion. “Be my guest. I’m heading out.”
Frank hurried to catch up, then led me deeper into the building. The pressure in my chest subsided with another hurdle taken care of, yet the biggest challenge still lay ahead.
Frank stopped walking when we reached an empty hallway. “What’s going on?”
“I need to speak with Amanda. Eliot told me you could help.”
“Why me? You were about to see her anyway.”
“I need her sharp.”
He snorted. “She’ll never be sharp—not in a million years.”
“I know you can do it. It will just be for a few minutes; enough time for me to get some answers.”
He rubbed his bearded chin. “Do the Shadow People know you’re here?”
Shadow People? I remembered Eliot saying Frank had no idea who The Society was. “They don’t know, and I need you to keep your mouth shut about it.” I pulled out the envelope and handed it to him. “Three grand.”
He whistled and peeked inside. “Sweet. I don’t know why people are interested in Amanda all of a sudden. There was a detective here a few days ago.”
A dark realization hit me. “Did you see him?”
“The detective? Sure. I called the Shadow People right away.” He glanced at the envelope before sliding it into his back pocket. “Nothing for you to worry about, though. I’m a man of my word. Hmm, you okay?”
I needed to stop glaring at him with murder in my eyes, but it was difficult. If I got a chance to snitch on him to The Society, I would do so in a heartbeat.
“I’m okay,” I said.
“Cool. Visiting hours are almost done. We’ll need to be quick.”
“Then let’s be quick.”
*
I waited outside the room while Frank did whatever was needed to make Amanda carry on a short conversation. After about ten minutes, he returned. “I did what I could in such a short time. Whatever you want from her, you better get to the point quickly.”
I nodded and entered the room. Amanda sat on the only bed, wearing a bluish hospital gown, her pale arms wrapped around her bent knees. She rocked back and forth, humming a tune I didn’t recognize. Her long, blonde hair was filled with tangles and bald spots.
How many men had she rubbed cheap makeup on before cheerfully sending them off to go through hell?
I drew a breath and cleared my throat, but she didn’t acknowledge me. I took a step closer. “Amanda?”
After a few seconds, she slowly tilted her head at me. Her eyes seemed hazy, a bit of drool dripping from her slack mouth.
Is this supposed to be her lucid version?
“Do you remember me?” I asked.
She narrowed her eyes, still absently rocking back and forth. “No. Are you here to finger me?”
“No.”
She winked—or tried to. “Do you wanna?”
“I don’t. I’m Jonah Carter. We met a long time ago.” I took another step forward, but not close enough in case she tried attacking.
“Jonnnnah.” A shred of recognition flicked in her eyes. “Oh, I remember you! Pretty Jonah. Where are your curls?”
“I cut them.”
“With a sharp knife?” Her eyes lit. “Did you bleed?”
“No. I need to ask you something. It’s about The Society.”
She scowled and shook her head. “I ain’t talking about that.”
“I just have one question, and then I’ll leave you alone.”
She shook her head more frantically. “Nope. Not talking. Not a peep. They’ll take out my tongue and make me eat it.”
“Amanda, please. Just one question. I know you had to stay at a motel for them to take you to the estate. Where was the last motel?”
She began humming loudly, her eyes shut tight. I was losing her.
“Amanda, do you remember The Director?”
She stopped humming and opened her eyes, looking more curious than before. “The Director who got sick?”
“Yes.”
“Is he still alive?”
“He… yes, but he needs your help.”
I finally had her full attention. “How can I help?”
“The medicine he needs was left at the motel. If you tell me—”
“Liar! He never knew about that motel. He left before they started using it. Liar! ”
I raised my hands to calm her down, afraid that Frank or someone else would barge in to drag me out. “Amanda, I never said he was there, but the medicine is—he told me that. Do you want him to die?”
She looked away, once more humming. It took all I had not to shake her. I worried she was already slipping back into whichever drugs they were feeding her.
“Just tell me where the motel is, and I’ll tell The Director you’ve helped me. He’ll be so happy.”
“Will he get me out of here?”
“Sure.”
She smiled nastily, making me worry she could see through my lies. “I’ll tell you where the motel is. Come closer.”
My instincts told me to stay back, but she must have sensed my desperation. I forced my legs to carry me forward until I was next to her bed. I remained still when she raised her hand and brushed her fingers against my cheek.
“I saw them fucking you,” she whispered. “You were very good.” Her fingers traveled lower, reaching my chest.
“Where is the motel?”
“It’s not a very nice motel.” She circled my nipple through my shirt. “I saw bugs there and a rat, but it might have been a kitten. They don’t let me have a kitten here, but they sure love my pussy.”
“Please tell me where—”
A knock on the door. “Hey, hurry up.”
Shit. “What do you want?”
She reached down and cupped my crotch. I grabbed her hand. “No.”
“Ooh, dirty Jonah wants to. I know you do.” She squeezed harder. “Take it out. I know you’re queer, but I’ll make it hard.”
I hissed and reached my hand between her legs, under the hospital gown. Amanda gasped and leaned back, spreading her legs and letting go of my crotch. She wasn’t wearing underwear. I swallowed my bile and massaged near her entrance. “Feels nice?”
“Y-yes. Go inside. It feels good inside. There’s rainbows inside.”
I slid two fingers into her, twitching them until her eyes rolled back. She rocked her hips back and forth on my fingers, moaning and groping her breasts. The bed squeaked.
“If you don’t tell me where the motel is, I’ll stop.”
“No, no. Don’t stop. Touch my rainbow.”
I slid my fingers deeper. “Tell me.”
Between breathless moans and groans, she finally did.
*
Despite my latest heated conversation with the Chief, I hoped to change his mind with what I’d discovered. I called him on my way back from the hospital, but he didn’t answer. I called him again once I was back home, and it went straight to voicemail. I knew he was ignoring me, but he was a fool to think I’d give up. I’d march straight to the station if needed.
I took a long shower, scrubbing Amanda off of my skin. The second she’d given me the location of the motel, I left her spread-eagled and pleading on the bed. Discovering the motel’s location wasn’t like finding the estate itself, but it was a whole lot better than what I had before.
After I’d eaten, I tried again to call the Chief, and this time he answered.
“Yes, Jonah?” He didn’t try to hide his impatience.
“I spoke with Amanda. I know where the motel is; where The Society picks up the employees from.”
He stalled before saying, “Can you be sure they still use the same place?”
“Eliot said they don’t change it frequently. It’s the best lead we have. Can you set up a team to survey the place? It’s in Tecopa, close to Vegas. The motel is called Delight's Hot Springs Resort.”
“A team?”
“Yes. I can’t do it by myself.”
“Wasn’t I clear this morning when I told you I was done with this?”
I dug my nails into the table. “I know what you’ve said, but I got the information we needed. If we can just track down those people at the motel, we’ll find the estate and Hayden.”
“Jonah, I’m not sending a team to the desert because you talked to a crazy woman.”
I hated how he dismissed my efforts. “I believe her, and if we end up wasting our time, no harm done.”
“No harm done? Do you think I have extra manpower lying around?”
“I don’t need ten people. One or two should be enough.”
“The answer’s still no.”
My leg began to bounce, my heart beating faster. “I know you’re trying to bury this, but I won’t let you.”
“It’s not up to you.” He drew a breath, and my body tensed before he dropped the bomb. “Hayden was abducted in relation to a drug investigation. We don’t have any further leads at the moment.”
My mouth went dry. “What?”
“This will be the statement the department sends out tomorrow. It’s over, Jonah.”
I pinched the bridge of my nose. “I’ll reach out to every news outlet in LA and tell them the truth.”
“They won’t—”
“Most would think I’m crazy, but this is LA, and people here love a good scandal. I just need one reporter to believe me, and then your delicate house of cards will start tumbling down.”
“If you get your story into the news, how long will it take The Society to kill Hayden?”
“He’s as good as dead either way, and I’d rather take you down with him.”
“You’re playing with fire.”
“I have nothing else left to play with.”
He remained quiet for a long time. I expected him to hang up, but he eventually said, “I’ll help you get hold of his aunt, Tammy.”
I opened my mouth to say that wasn’t enough, but Hayden’s aunt was my best chance at reaching the FBI, as Hayden had planned on doing. I couldn’t help but feel this might be a trap, but I was desperate.
“Okay,” I said. “Where can I find her?”