CHAPTER 11
Artemis
‘You can’t avoid them forever, you know,’ Cadmus told me softly, though his words were anything but.
Objectively I knew he was right but I just couldn’t bring myself to go down there.
Those people had been captured because of me, because of the trouble I had brought into the lives of their loved one and, consequently, them.
Guilt, I had learned through experience, was one of the worst emotions to overcome.
I knew that to do so I would need to stop beating myself up over things that were out of my control, or to at least gain the forgiveness of those that had been harmed.
But I didn’t deserve their forgiveness.
Not until I had defeated the people that were causing so much harm in the first place.
This guilt wasn’t necessarily new, but it was definitely a slow build to the point I was at now.
After I’d left Libby behind I had been swamped with the useless emotion to my own detriment.
I hadn’t even considered trying to fight back, choosing fear and running away over taking a stand.
If I had chosen bravery over cowardice, would the outcome have been different? Could I have already won this war, or would I have lost?
I would never know because I had chosen to save myself over everyone else.
Now, I couldn’t begin to fathom leaving anyone behind or letting innocent people suffer simply because I existed.
Because I refused to bow down to those life-ruining bastards that call themselves doctors.
That was something else I had on my to-do list that I was actively avoiding.
Demari and his sick-minded buddies were still on this ship, locked away but an ever present niggling in the back of my mind.
I would never escape them.
I didn’t think even their deaths would set me free. My trauma went far too deep, was far too embroidered into the very fabric of my being that they would forever torment me. The best I could hope for was to seclude that torment to my dreams so I could at least have the waking hours to myself, free from the memories of the pain and suffering I had endured at their hands.
Long, blue fingers encapsulated mine where I had been picking at them on my lap, and I looked up into Bromm’s light purple eyes.
‘You’re not at fault here, my love.
You have done nothing wrong, and no one is placing any blame on you.’
I pulled the covers up over my head and curled up between them both, mumbling incoherently in protest.
Cadmus chuckled, but it was more sad than anything.
After we’d had our night together things had changed between us.
We were closer than ever, and he had even gone with me to bring Bromm back when he had hidden from us. His guilt and fear over forcing me to have sex with him was absurd and we had told him as such, finally luring him back into the bed he belonged in.
Now, it was their turn to do the same for me, except instead of luring me to bed they were attempting to kick me out of it.
I had been distracting them (and myself) with copious amounts of sex, though I still had yet to explore Cadmus’s wings.
I knew they were an erogenous zone for Drakferns, but something was still holding me back.
He had tried to get me to stroke them, but I kept declining. There was just something a little too intimate about them. I knew I was being ridiculous, but while I cared for him a great deal, I couldn’t figure out why I wasn’t allowing myself to take that last little leap.
Because to me, it wasn’t so little.
Bromm was easy.
Loving him was no hardship.
Adding Cadmus to the mix… I supposed I was just waiting for the other shoe to drop. There was no way two men of such calibre could have fallen for me. I just wasn’t the type of person who would get so lucky.
Which was how we had ended up here.
Both of them were done with my moping, especially since I was well known for my fascination with Drakfern wings and I had a pair just waiting for me to run my fingers through those soft, vibrant feathers.
I had imagined them quivering beneath my touch far too many times to count and we all knew it, so I figured that was what tipped them over the edge.
They were done with my shit, and quite frankly so was I.
Yet, I still couldn’t bring myself to leave my room.
I had sequestered myself in here for the past few days, refusing to meet anyone or check in with the captives and their families.
It was bad form, I was well aware, but I was only one person. A single person that was being hunted by the most powerful, dangerous organisations within the Intergalactic Union.
I was allowed a moment to break down, stars-damn it.
Despite the nanites, I was still only human and shutting myself off from my emotions only worked for so long before I burst.
‘Come on, baby.
We’ll be right there with you, but people are starting to task questions about their elusive captain,’ Cadmus pushed, poking at my covered head.
‘I promise everything will be fine.
It’s like what you said to me: the longer you push it off the worse it’s going to seem, but when you finally do it you’ll realise you never had anything to worry about in the first place.’ Bromm’s soothing voice was like liquid silk, and that more than anything was what convinced me to push back the covers, though I didn’t sit up.
I just laid there and glared at the ceiling.
‘I don’t want to.’
Cadmus flicked my bottom lip that I had been pushing out without even meaning to.
‘Come on, beautiful.
No more pouting.
Time to be an adult again.’
Both men grabbed my hands and pulled me up simultaneously, and I protested vocally some more but didn’t stop them.
I let them put me on my feet and complied when they worked together to dress me.
Once my jumpsuit was back on, Bromm knelt down to lace up my boots while Cadmus ran his fingers through my hair to remove any knots.
When he finished I tilted my head back and let it drop onto his chest. Their care for me felt good, albeit strange, and I found that I didn’t want to fight against it anymore. So what if this was too good to be true? I would enjoy every moment until it was torn from me just like everything else in my life. I just hoped it wouldn’t be any time soon.
When Bromm rose he took my hand in his while Cadmus tangled our fingers together on the other side, and both of them led me from the room.
I cast a quick glance at where Dave Junior slept in his bed of pillows and blankets in the corner of the room, worried about him waking to find me gone, but the door shut behind us with a finality I felt in my bones.
The guys didn’t seem bothered as they led me away, so I tried to let it go.
I’d be back soon, anyway. I hoped.
The trek down to the infirmary was both insufferably long and far too short, but no one looked twice at us when we walked through the doors.
In fact, there weren’t even that many people in here.
Just Henrik who gave greeted us with a smile when we walked in, Reece with two people who must have been his parents as they sat with Xander around the still unconscious woman I had pulled from the topmost cage.
Her red hair was splayed out beneath her, draping over the side of the bed like the length was just too long to contain. Xander was in the process of brushing through it, his tanned skin tone a stark contrast to her pale, sickly pallor.
The blood-stained bandages didn’t escape my notice, either.
I would have put her on her front to avoid agitating the whip marks on her back, but her front contained just as many wounds that her position didn’t matter.
She would suffer either way.
Reece was the first to notice me, but the others were quick to follow when he jumped to his feet as soon as his eyes met mine from across the room.
‘Arty, hey.’
I shot him what I hoped was a smile but felt more like a grimace, the expression feeling wrong as I tried to align my muscles the correct way.
By the way his parents scooted away despite an entire room separating us, I figured it looked as bad as it felt.
‘Hey,’ I said lamely.
‘Um,’ he stalled, moving between his parents and placing a hand on their shoulders.
‘These are my parents.
Ma, Pa, this is Artemis, our captain.’
They studied me with a strange new interested in their eyes at that introduction.
‘You’re the woman who opened the cages,’ his mother said.
I cleared my throat of the frog that had gotten stuck in there.
‘Um, yup.
That’s me.’
Fuck.
Why was I being so awkward?
Cadmus snickered beside me and I shot him an accusatory glare. ‘What?’
‘You just remind me of who you were when we first met.
Super awkward.
It’s nice to see that part of you is still in there.
I was beginning to think it was an act because you’re always so composed. I like it.’
‘Oh, hush.’
His comment seemed to break the ice, however, and Reece’s parents relaxed a little more.
I moved closed, a little more confidence in my gait than before and extended my hand to Reece’s parents.
‘Hi, I’m Artemis.
I’s a pleasure to meet you.’
His father surprised me by gripping my hand first.
His grip was strong but through confidence rather than an attempt to intimidate, and he smiled up at me with a tired but kind expression.
‘It is a pleasure to meet you too, Artemis.
I am Roger Hastings, and this is my lovely wife, Ariadne.’
He released me in time for his wife to take over the handshake.
Her hand was small and delicate in mine, her skin pale and smooth.
Dainty.
Her smile was just as kind as her husbands, if a little more reserved.
‘Pleasure.’
When I glanced up at Reece I found him beaming at me, his smile bigger than I had ever seen it.
Toothy and white, and blindingly bright.
I couldn’t help but return it with one of my own.
‘How are you doing?’ I asked them.
‘Are you settling in okay?’
Mister Hastings waved away the question like it was an annoying bug buzzing around his ear.
‘We’re fine.
We were stashed into a small cage for a few days.
Others had it worse.’
As one, our gazes landed on Amarantha’s prone form lying broken and bruised in the cot.
Xander, sensing the direction of our attention, began smoothing out the wrinkles in her blanket and adjusting her hair until it draped just so.
‘Any news on when she’ll wake up?’ I asked him delicately.
‘Any day now,’ he responded, the hope in his voice so clearly forced that my heart broke for him.
‘Her physical wounds are healing just fine,’ Henrik announced as he joined us.
‘She just needs to break through whatever barrier is blocking her mind.
Those are the wounds that will need more tending to.
We won’t know the extent of her mental scars until she awakes, but she will live.’
Xander tensed at those words.
The thought of his sister suffering even more despite being removed from her tormentor’s grasp was clearly eating at him.
Perhaps that would be something I could help with, though…
‘Would you like me to talk to her after she wakes up?’ I asked him.
It took him a beat to realise I was talking to him, but when my words finally registered his head snapped up as he eyed me curiously.
‘What for?’
I shrugged, suddenly wishing I could rescind the offer, but then I studied Amarantha’s broken body once more and recognised in her the girl I used to be.
The one who allowed others to determine her worth and her value based on the torture her body was forced to endure.
‘I am experienced in pushing past mental and emotional trauma.
The scars left behind from abuse such as this are deep and change you at a fundamental level.
I had Libby to help me through it and remind me that there was something worth living for.
I had someone to share those horrors with and forge a new path in the light in spite of the shadows. I thought… maybe…’
‘I’ll ask her.
When she wakes.
I’ll inform her of your offer.’
It wasn’t a yes, but it also wasn’t a no.
In fact, he was giving her a piece of her power back by offering her the choice.
It was the kindest thing he could have done, and I was suddenly sad that I had never had a sibling like him growing up.
Libby and I may as well have been sisters, but our bond was forged through pain and suffering. Theirs was borne through love and family.
‘She’s a lucky girl.’
He blinked up at me, surprise widening his eyes. ‘What?’
‘To have a brother like you.
You’re a true protector, and your love for her is unconditional and unyielding.
She’s lucky to have you.’
His nostrils flared as his typically vibrant yellow eyes, now dulled with stress and worry, misted over with emotion.
He cleared his throat a few times before he was able to speak, but even then his voice still broke.
‘Thank you.’
I opened my mouth to tell him his gratitude wasn’t necessary but Bromm elbowed me in the side and Cadmus followed up by physically turning my body so I was facing Reece and his family again.
‘So,’ Reece began.
‘I still haven’t introduced you to these two, yet.’
Cadmus reached down to shake their hands, the motion a little more vigorous than I either one expected.
‘Cadmus Alaida.’
When it was Bromm’s turn, however, he merely smiled shyly and gave them the shortened version of his name, unwilling to provide his title.
His modesty was even more attractive now that I knew it was a genuine character trait rather than a temporary measure during his time at Nova Academy.
Unfortunately for him, Hurricane Addy showed up at that moment and bounced over in a whirlwind of chaotic energy, ploughing through his attempts at keeping it a secret.
‘He’s a prince, you know.’
I didn’t bother holding back my face palm and the sound of my hand smacking my forehead echoed throughout the room.
‘Oh! You’re Prince Brommyt Min’Tuk,’ Missus Hastings surmised.
‘I see it now.
I can’t believe I didn’t recognise you, Your Highness,’ she said, jumping to her feet and dipping into a graceful curtsey.
This was a woman that was well-versed in the aristocracy and had obviously interacted with royalty before.
‘Oh, that’s not necessary.
I prefer to bypass the formalities.
I’m so far down the line of succession I’m hardly considered royal at all.
There’s no need for that,’ he stammered.
She looked uncertain for a moment and I didn’t blame her.
She was probably used to entitled snobs who’d expected her to bow even lower in their presence just so they could feel taller, or at least that was how I expected royals to behave.
Bromm broke that stereotype without any effort, but Cadmus had once behaved as such.
Until I saw through the mask to the real him. Okay, so maybe they weren’t as bad as I had imagined, but they still had to keep up appearance in public at the very least, and it was clear that those instances were what she was used to.
‘Oh, right.
Of course.
My apologies Your High… Um, Bromm.’
She winced at the use of his informal name and I couldn’t help but giggle when he matched her reaction with his own.
‘Sorry,’ I chuckled when everyone shot me a curious look.
‘I’m not used to all of that,’ I told Missus Hastings.
‘Bromm’s always been just Bromm.’
When she sent a confused look to her son he simply shrugged, a happy smile still curling up the corners of his lips.
‘They’re in a relationship, Ma.’
‘Oh! I didn’t know.’
‘Why would you?’ I asked her.
She blustered around at the question, apparently caught off guard, and I turned to Bromm for clarification.
‘What did I miss?’
He released a laugh from deep in his belly, the sound echoing throughout the room.
Though I didn’t know why he was laughing it was contagious enough that I couldn’t help but join in.
‘Well, this is going well,’ Cadmus joked which made everyone else relax enough to participate in the moment of levity.
I leaned over to whisper to Cadmus.
‘I still don’t know what I missed.’
That seemed to set everyone off again and this time even Xander joined in, so I just stood back and watched them, pleased that even in my ignorance I could at least cause some happiness in these times of strife.