Chapter Twenty-Two
He hadn’t come back.
Elle had wept intermittently most of the night, finally falling into fitful sleep right before dawn, which only lasted an hour or two.
She awoke to a bed devoid of her husband while Melusine snored over on the lounge.
Knowing that Curtis had spent the night elsewhere left her feeling sick and alone.
Perhaps he’d even spent the night with his old love Larue, though she quickly discounted that idea.
It was a cruel one, coming from a confused and hurt woman.
It wasn’t fair to him. Unable to sleep any longer, Elle rose and prepared for the day.
She didn’t know if any of the allies were still there.
Not that it mattered. She didn’t plan on dressing in lovely garments and parading around for them.
Quite the opposite. She planned on going about her day as she usually did and ignoring the bastards who thought so poorly of her.
She didn’t plan on ignoring Curtis’ parents, however, but perhaps they had left also.
It wasn’t as if there was any reason to stay now.
The feast had been a disaster.
As she moved about with her morning routine, Melusine awoke, yawning and scratching her head as she sat up on the lounge.
“What time is it?” she asked, yawning again.
Elle was over at the water basin. “Early,” she said. “This sun is just rising.”
Melusine’s eyes were closed as she scratched her head with two hands now. “Did you sleep?” she asked.
“A little. Did you?”
“A lot.”
That was the truth. Elle snorted. “You could sleep through the return of Christ and his angels,” she said. “You have always been that way.”
Melusine grinned, yawning yet again as she stood up and stretched. “I know,” she said, but she stopped yawning long enough to look at the bed. “Did Curtis return?”
“Nay.”
That seemed to wake Melusine up a little more when she realized how sad that must have made Elle. She went over to her as the woman washed her face.
“I would not worry,” she said softly. “I am certain he went to be with his family. He has not seen them in a while. He will be back this morning, I’m sure of it.”
Elle dried her face off. “As am I,” she said with more confidence than she felt. “Everything will be just as it was.”
Melusine thought her cousin sounded a little too cheery, but she didn’t push. For once in her life, she didn’t push. That young woman who often spoke before thinking was becoming more controlled these days. Being with Asa, and watching his temper, had helped her grow up a little.
She had some maturity these days.
“I’m sure it will,” she said. “But… are you well after last night?”
Elle nodded. “I am over the situation,” she said. “It happened, but it is finished. We move on.”
Melusine could see that she was trying hard to be brave. “That is the best way to look at it,” she said. “If my opinion matters for anything, I believe Curtis defended you admirably.”
“Did he?” Elle said, looking at her. Then she thought about it. In fact, she’d had all night to think about it. “I suppose he did. He was certainly angry enough.”
Melusine nodded. “He was,” she said, putting a hand on Elle’s shoulder.
“I do not know why he left last night and did not come back, but he loves you, Elle. You could search your entire life and never find a man who would love you as much as he does. Whatever you are angry about—whatever chased him from this chamber—I would not be too harsh on him. Not only has he possibly driven away allies over what they’ve said about you, but now you’ve chased him away, too. It must be very hard on him.”
It was shockingly apt advice coming from Melusine. She was absolutely right. Elle smiled her thanks for the woman’s counsel, and Melusine smiled in return before heading for the door.
“If you no longer require me, I must return to my chamber to bathe and dress myself,” she said. “I promised Asa that I would break my fast with him.”
Elle waved her on. “Go,” she said. “I have chores this morning. Come and find me in the kitchen yard when you are finished with Asa.”
Melusine gave her a smile that suggested she might never be finished with Asa as she unbolted the door, passed through, and shut it behind her. That left Elle with a smile on her face, thinking of Melusine and the wild-tempered Asa. But it also made her think of Curtis.
She missed him dreadfully.
You could search your entire life and never find a man who would love you as much as he does.
Elle knew that to be true.
Dressed in a linen surcoat with a light shift underneath and a leather belt around her still-slender waist, she braided her hair and tied a kerchief around her head to keep her hair out of her face.
Elle was a woman used to doing things for herself, and that included things that most noblewomen left to servants.
Sweeping, scrubbing, and laundry were more than part of it.
Today was laundry day because she had a few things she needed to wash, including two tunics that smelled horribly because her husband tended to wear clothing for days at a time, until she couldn’t stand the smell any longer.
It made her smile to think of how quickly she had learned that aspect of him.
Curtis had lived a man’s life before her, without any female influence other than his mother, so he wasn’t hugely aware of things like smelling clean or brushing his hair or even farting at the table.
She had been married to him for two days when the cook had made a stew of beans and pork, and the knights had eaten massive portions of it only to start letting loose with gas a couple of hours after the meal.
As Elle and Melusine tried not to breathe through their noses, Curtis and his men farted up a storm to the point that the women had to flee the hall or suffocate.
Curtis had no idea why they were running until he followed them outside, watched them head for the keep, and then returned to the hall only to walk into a wall of smell that nearly knocked him off his feet. Then he knew.
And he had apologized for it.
As Elle gathered the laundry into a bundle to tie off and carry down to the laundry, she giggled when she remembered the Notorious Night of Beans.
They’d had beans since, but the knights were now polite enough to go outside if they needed to clear out their bowels, even if they were running outside every few minutes.
It made for a better-smelling hall, at least.
But it had been rather funny.
With her laundry bundled up and ready to go, Elle went to the wardrobe in the chamber and pulled forth a sack of dried rosemary and lavender.
The old cook had given her that helpful hint to make the laundry smell fresher, and she liked it very much.
She especially liked it on her shifts. She would throw it into the laundry water and scrub the clothes with it, leaving the scent behind.
Gathering the sack, she was bending down to pick up the laundry when the chamber door opened.
She looked up from her laundry to see Curtis walking into the room.
The man looked like hell.
“May I come back, please?” he asked before she could say a word, tears glistening in his eyes.
“Elle, I’ve spent almost eight hours away from you, and I cannot stay away any longer.
If I must beg for your forgiveness for the rest of my life, I will, but please do not make me stay away any longer. I cannot bear it.”
Instantly sympathetic and feeling horribly guilty, Elle rushed to him and threw her arms around his neck, kissing him deeply as he responded with passion she’d never before experienced from him.
He held her so tightly that he was in danger of squeezing her to death.
It was difficult to breathe, but she didn’t pull away.
He was so terribly distraught that she let him do what he needed to do.
If that meant holding her in a viselike grip, then so be it.
“I am sorry if I was angry at you,” she whispered between heated kisses. “I should not have been so cruel to you. Please forgive me, my dearest.”
He was responding to her kisses feverishly.
“It was my fault, all of it,” he said. “I should have told you about Gruffydd, and I should have told you about Larue. It was wrong of me not to. It was wrong of me to let her into the castle after I knew she had married Munstone. I should have turned her away, alliance be damned.”
She ran her fingers through his blond hair. “You were trying to balance an alliance against a woman you hoped had forgotten you,” she murmured. “I do not blame her that she has not. I cannot fault her for her good taste. But please do not withhold information like that from me again.”
“I swear upon my life that I won’t,” he said. “This has been something of a learning situation for me, Ellie. I’ve never had to consider anyone else’s feelings before, at least not like this. I thought I could control the situation, but I was wrong. Very wrong. It’ll never happen again.”
She believed him.
After that, they simply held one another.
No lust, nothing sexual, but something that went beyond the physical.
It was the melding of souls, the blending of minds, body against body as they drew strength from one another.
Curtis had his face buried in the side of her neck, inhaling everything about her.
He’d spent a horrible night of too much drink and too much emotion, so much so that he couldn’t even sleep it off.
He’d been awake all night with his father and brothers and brother-in-law, understanding what it meant to love a woman so much that he couldn’t breathe or talk or think without her.
His father and Peter and Alexander understood that, even if his younger brothers didn’t.
It was a night of reflection and regrets.
As soon as the sun rose, he was on her doorstep whether or not she wanted him.
Thank God she wanted him.