Chapter Three #4
She gazed at him, long and hard. The more she looked upon him, the more handsome he seemed to become. His face was so perfectly formed that it was difficult to find any flaw with it. She became so upswept in his male beauty that she nearly forgot her train of thought.
“May I ask you something?” she asked.
“You may.”
“Are you running from someone?”
He almost looked amused. “Why would you ask that?”
“Because when you first came to the church in Cartingdon, you were wearing heavy cloaks to conceal your identity. You did not want anyone to notice you.”
His gaze gave her a hint of what he might be thinking. “You are correct in that assumption, but that is merely prudence. Knights that go about announcing themselves are inviting trouble. I would rather not invite it. I have enough.”
“Then you are not running?”
“Nay, mistress. I do not run from anything.”
“I did not mean to suggest that you do.”
He smiled at her, releasing her hand so that he could remove his gauntlets. “I know you did not.” He ran his fingers through his hair, a gesture of fatigue, before reclaiming her fingers, this time flesh against flesh. Instantly, his brow furrowed. “Good Christ, your hand is searing.”
Before Toby could reply, he put a hand to her forehead. “You are burning with fever. Did you not realize this?”
She hadn’t, really. All she knew was that she hadn’t felt very well. “I have not felt my best this morning,” she admitted.
Tate put a hand on her cheek for good measure. It was soft, like baby’s skin, and was quite warm. Inadvertently, he touched the bandage on her wrist and his focus was drawn to it.
“What is this?” he demanded.
He was unwrapping it before she could answer. “It… it was an accident,” she stammered.
He ripped away the linen and was faced with the four festering crescent-shaped incisions. He stared at them a moment, and his manner cooled dramatically.
“Who did this to you?”
His voice was a growl. Toby looked at him, her eyes full of fear. “It was an accident,” she repeated.
His jaw ticked. He reached to her neckline, pulling back the garment to expose a portion of the bruise he had seen the day before. “And this? Was this an accident, too?”
She tried to move away from him. “It was.”
He grabbed both of her hands, refusing to let her leave the chair. “You will tell me who did this to you. Was it your father?”
She shook her head. “Nay, of course not. He would never lay a hand on me.”
“Then who?”
“It was an accident, I tell you. You need not concern yourself. Moreover, I do not see how it is any of your affair.”
He stared at her. Then he dropped her hands and stood up. “You are right, of course,” he said coldly. “Forgive my impudence for asking.”
He stood up and turned on his heel. He was nearly to the door when she called out to him.
“My lord?”
He paused, not saying a word, but turned to face her.
Ill, uncomfortable, Toby stood up and fought to swallow her pride.
She didn’t want to tell him and wasn’t even sure where to start, but he was the first person in her entire life that had ever shown any concern for her.
She felt that she should explain so he didn’t think her unkind.
“This has gone on so long that I do not think of it anymore,” her voice was a whisper.
“It is simply something that happens now and again. Please understand that my father, no matter how much he drinks, has never laid a hand upon me. Nor has my baby sister. What happens… what you have seen… cannot be helped.”
He came back into the room. “What do you mean it cannot be helped?”
“Simply that.”
“You do not do this to yourself, do you?”
She looked as if he had just asked her something deeply painful. “Of course not,” she breathed. “It is just that my mother….”
“Your mother does this to you?”
He raised his voice and she put her hands up to quiet him.
“She cannot help it, my lord. She is ill and confined and does not know what she is doing. After suffering an attack during the birth of Ailsa, she has never been the same. The lovely woman I once knew as my mother has become something wicked and frightful. She is out of her mind with disease and does not realize the pain she inflicts.”
“On you.”
She hesitated. “Aye.”
He didn’t know what to say but his expression eventually softened to one of sorrow. Reaching out, he gently took her swollen hand and re-examined the wounds. “What she does is wrong, mistress. You endure too much.”
“I endure what I must.”
Still holding her hand, he took his other hand and felt her forehead once again.
It was a gentle gesture, something she was unused to.
Much to her horror, tears sprang to her eyes and spilled onto her cheeks.
No one had ever shown her such compassion.
Before she could turn away to wipe her face, he swept away her tears with his thumbs.
“No tears, Elizabetha,” he murmured, a gentle smile on his face.
“I am called Toby,” she sniffled.
His smile grew. “To me, you are Elizabetha. I am the only one permitted to use that name.”
She did not understand what he meant but she instinctively knew that it could not be bad. Moreover, she liked the way he said her Christian name; Elizabay-tha. He rolled it off his tongue in a marvelous way she’d never heard before.
He gently moved her back towards the chair. “Come and sit. Stephen was a Hospitaller knight and has knowledge of healing. He will give you a brew to abate the fever.”
She allowed him to sit her down. “You are most kind, my lord.”
“You deserve nothing less.”
Stephen of Pembury seemed far more congenial with their second official meeting. He concocted a brew of willow bark for the fever and added something to make her sleep. Exhausted, ill, she fell asleep in the chair in her father’s solar with Tate and Stephen standing vigilant guard beside her.