Chapter 12
Clyde
I didn’t go to the meeting with my club.
My loyalty should be theirs first, but after seeing Road again, smelling him, being so close I could see the stubble on his chin, I could wait no longer. I don’t want to meet him for half an hour, get off, and go. No, I want to take my time and enjoy it, and when will such a perfect opportunity present itself next?
The whole chapter won’t be back until tomorrow.
Soon after leaving behind the place where we accosted Rooster, I made everyone stop again, my mind finally made up. Everyone gets sick once in a while, and while no one was happy about me staying behind, it wasn’t that big of a deal. My uncle will shake hands with the new supplier, and my absence won’t even be noticed.
And I can hopefully do more than shake hands with Road.
I’m standing by the side of the road in the forest where I dropped the pin on the map for him. It’s a secluded area, so whether he decides to stab me today, or gets a bit too grabby, there will be no witnesses.
This isn’t our final destination, as I like to keep my secrets, but there’s already a thrill of the forbidden waiting here for him.
I’m on my second cigarette when I hear the roar of a bike engine. Despite the excitement awakening my whole body, there’s also an ache in the pit of my stomach, and I can’t let it take root if I don’t want to leap on my bike and run away from this secret desire I have.
My feet remain affixed to the mossy ground, and I lean against a tree, breathing deeply to trick myself into feeling that bit calmer. Road might have as few options as me, but he’s a member of the enemy club, known for being an unhinged bastard. Is it really such a good idea to give in to my cravings with him, when I could go on a trip somewhere far and— no . I will not do that ever again. Strangers on apps are not safe just because they aren’t Roadkill of the Vulture Hollow MC. So I wait until he emerges from between the trees, heading for me on his ever-shiny cherry red bike.
There it is, that painful feeling in the stomach, but I bear with it, watching Road slow down and stop right next to me. Fuck, he looks good on that hog, ass tipped back, the goggles hiding his eyes and true feelings from me. Not that I expect any feelings other than lust.
“Alone?” he asks, dismounting.
I put out my cigarette and nod. I’ve been with women a few times, and while those encounters confirmed how I always felt about my sexuality, I’m not shy about touching people. With him? I don’t know where to start. All I know is that every emotion and sensation I’m feeling is visceral and real.
Should I get to the point and tell him that we’re leaving this spot? Hug… him…? Just like with kissing, it feels strange to be affectionate with the man I fought several times, who stabbed me, and who surely hates my guts beyond the surface of lust.
Most of all though, I’m a member of an outlaw MC. I’m fucking confident. I hate not knowing what to do with him, but when he walks toward me, my head’s empty as a dusty vase left somewhere in the attic. I remember the way he casually threw a knife at our road captain earlier, how he walked toward us with confidence that made a group of men part for him. When his gaze pins mine, I know my knees would have spread wider if I were sitting.
I’m supposed to say something witty, show that this isn’t affecting me all that much, but then he pushes his fingers into the hair at the back of my head and leans in.
My thoughts are fuzzy, my heart leaps, and my dick is already getting hard, but I realize what he’s doing just as his lips are about to press against mine.
I told him I won’t be kissing him.
Even if I kinda want to .
In the very last second, I manage to turn my head. I’m not trying to escape him altogether and rub my cheek against his, but there are limits to what I’m offering. Now that he broke the barrier between us, I find it much easier to wrap my arms around his waist. I smile to myself while he can’t see my face.
From afar, we might look like two people reuniting after years apart, but this is about the physical contact. Getting to hold him. My only experience with hugging men is related to the camaraderie shared with my club brothers, but nothing beyond that. Seconds pass, until it lasts way longer than any other hug in my life, but he doesn’t seem eager to pull away either and rests his chin on top of my head, as if wanting to remind me that he’s a bit taller.
Overcome by the fragrance he carries, rich and sharp like the danger he stands for, I barely hear it when he speaks. “I assume you have a place in mind?”
“Yeah,” I whisper, then clear my throat and repeat it in a normal voice. I step back, reluctantly letting go of him. After a moment of hesitation, I run my hand over his super short buzz cut. It’s such a thrill to touch him however I want to, and I bet that’s what he feels too. That I’m available to him in a silent understanding. He doesn’t have to dance around it, and neither do I. “The spot is extremely private, but secret. Put this over your eyes, and I’ll take you on my bike.” I present him with a black bandana he can use as a blindfold.
When he doesn’t immediately take it, my stomach sinks.
“No way,” he tells me, pulling away from my arms with a twist to his lips.
“Why not? You wanna do this or not?” My instinct is to always bristle in conflict to force my will, but Road isn’t any better and snorts.
“You think I’m stupid, or something? You want me to leave my ride behind, let you blindfold me, and then take me to some cellar, where all your buddies are already waiting for blood?”
I hum in frustration. He’s wrong. Of course. I want to take him to my secret spot where I can get naked with him, but I see why he might worry. Especially after today.
“Embarrassed to ride on the bitch seat? You’d get to press against my ass,” I try in hopes that a different angle might work.
Road snorts and taps the underside of my chin. It’s barely a lick of his fingers, but something about the way he does it, as if I’m an insolent brat in need of chastising, makes my knees weaken. “You demand a lot of trust without offering any to me, Blue Eyes. ”
I don’t know if he’s being patronizing or cocky, but I don’t hate it. For once, I don’t have to fight for every scrap of social standing, like I do around my brothers.
“Okay, fine. But if you tell anyone about this place, I will kill you. Do we have an understanding?”
His dark gaze meets mine, and he offers me his hand. Something about this gesture feels reassuring, because he’s not being playful. If we shake on it, his lips will remain sealed.
With all too much air stuck in my lungs, I squeeze his fingers, but before I can withdraw, he pulls my hand to his lips and tucks his large nose into my palm.
I’m so out of my fucking depth with him. He’s voracious and only gives proof to that when he licks my hand like some hungry beast. His hot wet tongue makes my insides flutter, and a long sigh leaves my lips as I watch him, mesmerized.
I’m excited by Road’s body, from his wide shoulders to his intense eyes, but also by his shameless desire for me.
“I’m getting hard. Let’s go,” I rasp, because there’s no reason to be coy with the guy I want to… do things with. I don’t know what, or how, or how much, but one way or another, we’re both getting off together today.
He smirks, and I shiver when he nips my hand before letting it drop. Heat falls over me like a blanket, and it’s so stifling I worry I might not be able to make it to our destination before—before what?
My gaze slides down his strong chest, and I inhale at the sight of the bulge at the front of his pants. My brain devoid of thought, I… touch it. It’s an out-of-body experience when I see my own hand go there and cup his cock.
He grunts, gaze trained on my face as we stand on the lonely road, between never-ending rows of trees. Maybe pulling away would have been easier if I focused on the fragrance of the woods rather than on the erection pushing at my hand.
“Found something you like, Blue Eyes?”
My breaths are shallow as I rub him with my hand. I’m conflicted about doing this with Road, but since my discovery about him, my thoughts shifted, and I can no longer see him as the guy whose face I wanna punch. Pleasuring him makes me feel weirdly subservient, but is it really, when I’m the one who wants to do it?
“Fuck…” I utter as my dick strains against my jeans.
Undress him. Suck his cock. Suck it here, on the side of the fucking road. My brain throbs with pure arousal that makes my mouth water whenever I think of his hot pulsing dick in my mouth, hairy thighs to the sides of my face, his happy groans and grunts when I take him deep—
The sound of a faraway engine makes me take a step back, but I don’t have to touch my cheeks to know I’m flushed.
He beams at me, but how can I fault him for enjoying himself? Still, I clear my throat and head straight for my bike, trying not to let him distract me again, because, fuck, I was moments away from giving him head at the side of the road.
“Sure hope that place of yours is not too far away,” Road calls out.
I don’t even answer, just hop on my bike and speed away at full throttle. He better be right behind me.