Chapter 31
CHAPTER THIRTY-ONE
FLYNN
I lie in bed, staring at the ceiling. Moonlight shines through the window, making shadows dance across the walls. I’m so tired, but sleep won’t come. It feels close, like I could almost fall asleep, but it keeps slipping away, leaving me wide awake and frustrated. Every time my eyes drift shut, memories of the past begin clawing their way back in—whispers of cruel laughter, hands that had taken without permission, binds that had chafed against my skin.
My body remembers every moment of my time with the Carlisle Pack, and I’m sure it will continue even now that they’re dead. Even when my mind begs to forget every one of them.
The sheets beneath me are soft, nothing like the coarse blankets I am accustomed to. The air smells of them. The ones who are my true bonds. I clench the sheets with my fists, willing myself to sink into the safety this place promises, to accept that I’m no longer trapped in a prison. But my mind refuses to let my memories be banished so easily.
A warm, small hand slides into mine, fingers lacing together like a silent promise. Sasha.
“I’m here,” she murmurs. “You’re not alone, Flynn. I thought you were asleep.”
My throat tightens. I want to believe her, to sink into the warmth of her presence and let it chase away the doubts that have settled deep in my bones. But the doubts stick, tangling in the knots of my fear.
“I don’t know if I can ever be normal again.” My voice cracks, barely more than a whisper, the weight of my confession crushing it. “What if I’m always broken? What if I never stop looking over my shoulder, waiting for them to come back for me?”
Sasha squeezes my hand, grounding me. “You’re not broken, Flynn. You survived. That’s strength, not weakness. And they’re never coming back for you. They’re gone. No one is ever going to control you like that again. No one will ever hurt you. Levi, Stone and I promise you that.”
A shuddering breath escapes me. “I don’t even know who I am anymore.”
“You don’t have to figure it all out tonight,” she says gently. “One step at a time. And I’ll be with you for every single one.”
Something in her tone—something unwavering, unshakable—eases the tightness in my chest, just enough for me to take a real breath. I turn my head slightly, meeting her gaze in the soft glow of the room. There’s no pity in her eyes, no hesitation. Just understanding.
A slow, creeping warmth spreads through me. It doesn’t erase what I’m feeling, but I feel like it’s slowly beginning to chip away piece by piece. Maybe one day I’ll feel free and not bogged down by my past.
“Will you stay with me? Hold me?” I ask.
“Of course. You never have to ask.” She slides under the blanket with me, never letting go of my hand, and keeping just a small space between us.
My eyes grow heavy, exhaustion finally coming out as the victor. My grip on Sasha’s hand loosens, but true to her words, she doesn’t leave. She stays, her presence a shield against the darkness. For the first time in longer than I can remember, I let myself close my eyes with no fear overwhelming me. Sleep finally takes over and I give in without a fight.
* * *
I don’t know what time it is, but I feel Sasha stir beside me just before Levi’s scent of leather and bourbon becomes heavy in the room. But he’s not alone; my other alpha is with him. Stone’s woodsy scent envelops me just before the heavy sound of footsteps come to a halt at my closed door.
My stomach clenches instinctively, my body reacting before my mind can catch up. I tense, preparing for the Carlisle Pack to burst in and take me back. Fear overtakes me that this was just another one of their punishments for some unknown misbehavior of mine.
Then I feel it. No, not it, her, moving beside me. Sasha. She’s still beside me. She takes hold of my hand, giving it a reassuring squeeze.
“Shhh, Flynn. It’s just Levi and Stone checking on us. They’re good men,” she whispers. “They’ll understand everything you’re feeling. Just trust them.”
But would they? I’m not sure I could even face them. The idea of standing before another alpha, much less two—strong, powerful, dominant alpha’s—sends a ripple of unease through me.
There’s a soft knock on the door, far softer than either of them should make.
“Sasha,” one of them calls from the other side.
“They just want to see you, see me. To make sure we’re okay. Can they come in? If you don’t want them to, then I’ll go outside and send them away.”
I worry my bottom lip, fighting with myself for what to do. Finally, I relent.
“They can come in, but I don’t want them to get close to me. Not yet.”
“I understand.” She lets go of my hand and stands up slowly, making her way over to the door. She takes hold of the handle and the door creaks as she opens it just a crack. She whispers something to the men on the other side, but my heart is racing so fast I can’t make it out.
She steps back, opening the door wider and my breath hitches as I scoot up in the bed, sitting upright, holding the comforter tight to my body.
A man stands in the doorway, broad-shouldered, dark hair with a beard. His presence is commanding but not imposing. Stone. It has to be him. His dark eyes flicker between me and Sasha, his expression unreadable.
“Hey,” he finally says, his voice deep but careful, full of something that feels familiar. “I’m Stone. it’s nice to finally meet you.” He steps to the side as Levi moves into the room beside him.
I swallow hard, my fingers tightening around the comforter before Sasha moves back, taking my hands in hers. My instincts scream at me to retreat, to curl in on myself and disappear to escape the alpha, no alphas, before me.
But neither Stone nor Levi move closer. They stay right where they are.
Sasha’s voice fills my ear, becoming my anchor. “One step at a time.”
“We know this is new and overwhelming. But Levi and I just needed to see you, to know that you’re okay. We’ll leave you for now, but we’d love to talk and get to know you tomorrow.”
I don’t say anything. In fact, I barely nod. It wasn’t much. But it was a start. They each give me a smile before turning and leaving the room, shutting the door behind them.