Chapter 6 Drystan
DRYSTAN
To love you is like having a chronic illness; it will never go away, no matter how inconvenient and uncomfortable—even painful—it might be. I guess I just have to embrace that love.
In the dark of the tunnel, I slide my hand into Notto’s. I can practically feel him roll his eyes, but his grip on my hand is tight. I’m not going to pretend for a second that’s because he wants my touch. It’s because he knows I want his.
I like to be touched. I crave the comfort of a presence that’s not threatening me with abuse. Probably a trauma response from the days I spent as a science experiment for the monsters who created me and trained me to be a child soldier under threat of cruel punishment.
My hand tightens in Notto’s when the line of light under the door ahead comes into view. For just a second, I hear laughter accompanied by the screams of one of my cellmates beyond the door.
I shake my head. Not real. That’s not real.
An image flashes before my eyes of the door opening, flooding the room with bright white light and nine-oh-eight being dragged in by a dark figure.
Nope. Not real. Not real. Not. Real.
Notto’s hand tightens. He tugs on my arm. It’s enough to erase the past so I’m only seeing the present. The door ahead doesn’t open until we reach it and open it ourselves. There’s daylight on the other side. Not torture.
I flinch at the bright light when Keary pushes open the door. The physical reaction makes my monster expand in my chest, and for just a second, I vanish entirely. Only Notto sees it, though, as Rainer and Keary are in front of us.
The outside comes into view. Shapes become recognizable. I don’t know where I am, but I know where I’m not.
“Okay?” Notto asks.
I nod and let his hand go. Darkness always creates an uncomfortable reaction in me. I’m not afraid of the dark. I’m just afraid of the memories that the dark summons.
Notto’s question makes Rainer and Keary look back at me. Rainer doesn’t understand why the question was asked. His eyes flicker down my body, examining to see if he can identify the reason Notto’s asking.
Keary knows though. His eyebrows knit together as he examines my face.
I give him a smile, hopefully a reassuring one.
The one circumstance where Keary isn’t standoffish is when I struggle with memories of my past. It’s the only time that he truly lets me see a side of him I crave more than finally breaking free of the past’s grip on my mind.
Both turn forward again while Notto secures the door behind us.
We’re in a park. The door we just walked out of is within the side of a building that’s seen far better days. No one would look twice at this building.
“Where are we?” Rainer asks.
“East of the cemetery,” Keary answers. “Where are we headed?”
Rainer shrugs. “Just hunting monsters.”
Keary gives him a bemused smile. Notto shakes his head.
“You’re hunting particular monsters, yeah?” Keary asks. Rainer nods. “Tell me about them. Tell me about what you remember.”
Rainer glances around, maybe looking for something or trying to regain his position in the world. Does he recognize his surroundings?
“They came at the first light. They were bipedal animals with massive claws and teeth. Not all the same kind of monster. Some had tails and some had pointed ears. Some had fur on their faces. One had wings that looked like they’d been shredded with a knife, though he could still…
maybe not fly, but glide? Does that make sense? ”
I nod even though he can’t see me.
“Yes. Sounds like hybrid forms,” Keary says. “Not unusual for this particular kind of attack. What else? Did they wear anything distinguishing like this?” He pulls out a band from his pocket with the Eriva family crest.
Rainer shakes his head. “Not like that. Not a House. More like…” He trails off. His eyes move around the area. Maybe looking for something specific to describe what he’d seen.
“Like this,” Notto says and pulls a shredded piece of folded cloth from his pocket.
Rainer looks over his shoulder, and I see his body stiffen. “Yes. Exactly that.” There’s louder distrust in his voice now, and I can almost see him withdraw from us.
“They killed one of my brothers,” Notto says as he folds it back into his pocket. “I tore this off the monster’s chest when I caught up with him. It’s my trophy.”
I’m not convinced that Rainer believes him, but I do.
There are monsters, and then there are monsters.
The latter are who we all hunt because they’re the ones who fucked up the world.
They are “kill on sight,” whereas every other living creature is left alone until otherwise provoked. That’s the unspoken rule.
“Do you remember the color of the mark?” Keary asks.
“Color?”
Notto pulls out the piece of fabric again and points to the dot in the middle. “They range anywhere from a solid color to striped patterns.”
Rainer studies the dot. “I think it was dark. Maybe I’d know if I saw it.”
“Is it the color of this one?” I ask, nodding at the cloth.
“I didn’t know to notice the color,” Rainer says, frowning. “I need to think about it.”
“What can you tell us about the way they fought? Different pods have specific methods,” Notto says, once more placing his fabric into his pocket.
Rainer shakes his head. “They didn’t use weapons. They used their hands. They didn’t speak but made animal sounds. Their eyes were… I can still see them when I close my eyes.”
“Did they kill everyone?” I ask.
“Yes. Until there was no one left but me and two others. We were hidden.”
“But did they take the bodies with them?”
Rainer glances at me. “Yes. They dragged everyone off. That’s how I followed them for a few days until the blood trail ran cold.”
“Did you find remains?”
“Remains? I found some pieces of clothing. Things that our families had on them that must have fallen away.”
“But did you see human remains? Bones. Body parts. When an animal takes down their prey to eat, there are bones left behind. Did you find any?” Keary asks.
Rainer shakes his head. “No.”
They might still be alive yet wishing for death. I’m not sure Rainer will want to see them in that state. It would be kinder for him not to.
“Where was your colony?” Notto asks.
“The colony that we left when I was eight was one of the ones living in Nyc City. We broke off and moved away from the ocean when the beasts from the water began terrorizing the colonies on land more frequently. We found a lake, and for ten, maybe twelve years, we lived there in peace. No other human camps bothered us. There was the occasional beast that passed through, but even they tended to leave us alone.”
“Were there monster families in the area?” Keary asks.
“Yeah. Bludd to the north and Morymoto a little further west. They never bothered us. Once, a Morymoto traded with us for some fish.”
“I think the best chance of jogging your memory is visiting a pod,” Notto says. “Not that I want you to relive that trauma, but if something is going to trigger details that your mind might be suppressing, it’s facing the same kind of monsters.”
“You think that’s going to help?”
“Yes. If nothing else, I think you’ll be able to tell us that that specific pod wasn’t the one who attacked your family.”
“Trust me when I tell you that the most insignificant thing can bring back details you didn’t even know you knew until something very specific pulls it from the depths of your mind,” I tell him. “Even a century later.”
Notto takes my hand again as Rainer glances back at me. I expect a frown or maybe more disbelief. I’m used to seeing those expressions. Instead, I see neither. It’s… compassion. Understanding. He nods and turns forward again, his eyes scanning the area.
“We can start with the blue-rimmed pod since it’s relatively close,” Keary says. “Though you’ve moved a long way south of Nyc. The pod you’re looking for is likely much closer to home.”
“How far south am I?” Rainer asks.
“We’re a couple days south of Base 6.”
“A monster compound.”
“Aye. A monster compound. The original compound. The one responsible for killing the monster that had unleashed plagues on the world to extinguish humans.”
Rainer looks at Keary dubiously. I’m sure we’re challenging everything he thinks he knows. Keary gives him a wide smile.
“Is that where you’re from?” Rainer asks.
“Yes. Eriva lives in Base 6. We’ll stop on the way and get the location of the pods closer to Nyc City. They’ll have the branding on file, too, so maybe seeing them will help you determine which one we’re looking for.”
“Why are you doing this?” Rainer asks. “Why are you helping me?”
“You’ll probably die if you try a vigilante attack on your own,” Keary says. “Why wouldn’t you want help?”
“That’s not what I’m asking. Why are you helping me? What do you want?”
“I’m bored,” Keary answers, shrugging. “Why not? This is entertaining at the very least. It gives me something to do for a while.”
“What will you do when we’ve killed the pod that killed your parents?” I ask.
Rainer shakes his head. “To be honest, I thought I’d spend my life hunting them. I never thought I’d find them. I never thought I’d actually succeed. There was never an after in my mind.”
“You were going to walk into death to join them,” Notto says, irritated with him.
Rainer doesn’t answer. “Not in the way you’re implying. I don’t want to die to join my family. I don’t want to die at all. But I also know the probability that I’d succeed and the most likely outcome.”
“And you didn’t think to ask for help?” Notto demands.
“Ask who, Notto?” Rainer says, turning in his tracks to face my surly friend.
I grin as he crosses his arms. “My dead family? The two little kids that also survived? Ask the colonies who were already fighting beasts and losing? Ask the neighboring monsters when it was monsters who’d just killed my entire family?
Please, tell me which of those seems like a viable option. ”
Ohhhh… I like this human! Keary is practically giddy at his side as he stares down our Vodun god. It’s sexy as all hell. Tingles course through my body as I wait to see what’s going to happen.
What happens is that we’ve apparently walked far too close to a beast, and with Rainer’s raised voice, we now sound like prey. The only thing I hear is the flapping of wings before a massive gust of misplaced air comes hurtling toward us hard enough that we’re sent sideways by a few steps.
The thing drops from the sky at an angle, diving down with its massive claws out. Fucking carnivores. Seriously. Just mind your own damn business.
Rainer is the first to drop his bag, his new blade in hand, but Keary yanks him to the ground just as talons the size of a car pass through the air where we’d been standing a moment ago.
It screams its annoyance at having missed its kill.
“Time to show you how you’re supposed to fight a beast,” Keary says, and his body shimmers like a disco ball.
A ray of sun shifts across the sky, burning a dark scar into the ground as it cuts through the path the beast is taking, causing it to abruptly abort its trajectory back toward us. It lets out another furious squawk.
“Should we play with our meal for a while?” Keary asks as it comes back.
More rays of sunlight move around us, burning the ground as they chase the beast who refuses to give up its seemingly easy prey.
Rainer watches the beast warily, blade in hand. I have to give it to him, his stance is pretty good. I bet he’d get a clean shot in. It’s on the tip of my tongue to suggest we let him try when Notto jumps into the air and grabs hold of the beast’s massive claw.
We watch him climb his way up the thing’s body as the beast tries to shake him off, screaming in fury.
“Show off!” I yell, grinning.
There isn’t time to say much else before blood rains over us as Notto takes off the beast’s head. He rides the beast like a missile until it slams into the ground with an echoing thud. Everything around us shakes. It’s such an impressive impact that I can feel it in my bones.
Rainer stares with huge eyes as Notto walks back toward us, not a scratch on his body.
Keary huffs. “Why do you always have to ruin my fun, Notto?”
“Remember those ten minutes we weren’t covered in blood?” I ask, laughing. “That didn’t last long.”
“Good thing we had the foresight to bring changes of clothing,” Keary says, shoving Rainer playfully.
While I didn’t get a chance to actually do anything, I’m all amped up from the death of a massive beast. One less in the world. That’s a win.
I know my lack of involvement in anything that requires me to fight is by design. If I’m involved in it, it’s like an instant trigger to my childhood. Such colorful, bloody, painful days they were.
When Rainer is back on his feet, I reach for him. Just to see what he does. How is he with physical contact? Does he crave it like I do?
He’s stiff in my hold, but he doesn’t fight me when I pull him close. There’s wariness in his eyes as he studies my face. Oh. Would he let me kiss him? Do humans like to kiss? I think about the ones on base and wonder if kissing is something they learned from monsters.
Keary wants to keep this human, so I think it’s time to see just where he stands. I grip a fistful of his hair, bring his face to mine, and lock my mouth over his. I feel Rainer’s sudden intake of breath. Because he doesn’t know what kissing is? Does he like it?
His fingers dig into my chest when I lick his lips, so I think maybe he does, but then he’s wrenched from my hold. Keary stands before me with bright sun-golden eyes that I can’t look into without feeling the burn in my retinas. I flinch away, from both his anger and the heat.
“What the actual fuck, teko! Don’t touch. Why does that always need to be said?” he growls.
Keary roughly grasps Rainer’s arm and drags him in the direction we were headed. Where is he going? I thought we were keeping the beast for food, but now he’s walking away? Wasn’t he keeping the human?
“I guess he doesn’t want to share his toy,” I say sadly.
Notto snorts. “You’re cute. Come on.”