Chapter Fourteen
Jovan
With our agreement to go slow, the daddy/little aspect that was very important to us both was not moving at all. As two bigs, my being called away didn’t bother him at all, but when he was little, he needed more. Which made perfect sense and so far was just hanging there. The elephant in the room.
So, when I was invited to speak at a convention several states away, I didn’t invite Ernie to go with me.
I wanted him there, would miss him terribly, but I’d decided to let him tell me when he was comfortable to move forward with more, or if he wanted to take a step back.
Or out. We hadn’t been together very long, but already life without him sounded very lonely.
He was busy at work, anyway, I told myself.
His employer was unlikely to appreciate him taking any time off so soon.
It could even jeopardize his job. So, off I flew to be the keynote speaker at an emergency medicine convention, and Ernie stayed home and babysat Zoe.
I had planned to send her to the kennel as I had on previous occasions when I had to travel for work, but Ernie insisted that she would be sad.
I did point out that it was more of a dog spa, and she had friends there, but he held his ground.
Their relationship had no slow spots, and I was starting to think that if anything happened between us, he’d need to have joint custody.
We texted and called every day, and he sent me adorable pictures of Zoe at home, at the dog park, the café…
in a few she was wearing hats. So silly, so cute…
I’d never imagined a dog of her size wearing hats, but she could totally carry them off.
They were having a great time, it seemed, and that was good because without both of them, I was not having a great time.
The workshops and networking fortunately kept me busy during the days, and any downtime could be filled with a trip to the hotel fitness center, but at night…that’s when I missed them. My family, even if it wasn’t official between Ernie and me.
The suite the event had provided for me as keynote was huge, and every time I walked in, all I could think was how much Ernie would enjoy it.
The big jacuzzi tub, the fancy coffeemaker where he could prepare his favorites to sip on the balcony loungers.
The bed was big enough for us and Zoe, with room for a couple more big dogs—not that this hotel welcomed dogs.
A real negative as far as I was concerned.
But everything else was top of the line.
Fantastic. Luxurious. And as I lay on those 1500 thread-count sheets, unable to sleep for missing Ernie, and of course Zoe, I just wished I was home sitting in front of the TV, eating microwave popcorn, and watching just about anything he liked.
Finally, the last day of the event arrived and I did everything I had to do. Gave my speech at the big awards dinner, and slipped out before I could get dragged off to one of the after-parties everyone seemed to be going to.
I went back to the suite, made a coffee, settled in one of the loungers, and placed a FaceTime call.
Up to now, there’d been no video, just lots of quick updates and good mornings and good nights.
I was afraid anything more than that would have me leaving the event early, and the minute Ernie’s face came up on my phone, I knew I had been right.
“Hi!” he said, and I was taken aback by how tired he looked. Big bags under his eyes and not much of a smile.
“Is Zoe keeping you up at night? I knew she’d be a handful.”
“Don’t you say that about Zoe. She’s been wonderful, and I’m glad I could stay at your place so she gets her walks and stuff.”
“All right.”
“How was the speech?”
“I’ll send you a link in case you have nothing better to do than listen to me go on for a half hour about the latest in…well, it doesn’t matter what. You would be bored to tears.”
“Send it to me. I want to hear you be the keynote.”
I shrugged. “It’s just very technical and I was only nominated because the administration put me up for it. It’s good for the hospital.”
“It’s a big honor. Send me that link immediately.” This smile was real, but he still looked so tired.
“All right. I shouldn’t keep you. You need to get some rest.”
“I’m fine, just haven’t slept too well. You look pretty wiped out, too.”
“Thanks. I appreciate that. So, I’ll say good night and we’ll both get rest. I’ll be home tomorrow.”
“I’m glad. I’ve missed you.”
“Me too, Ernie.” Zoe popped into the frame beside him, only half of her big head fitting in. “And Zoe.”
He pulled the phone back a bit so I could see both of them, his arm slung over her shoulders. “She misses you, too.”
“She looks pretty happy. How many treats has she had?”
“Not nearly enough to make up for the sadness.” He hugged her and looked back at the screen. “Could I ask you a favor?” His voice changed, sounding younger, more like his little self although not entirely there.
“Of course. Anything. Want me to bring you a present from the airport? Toblerone?” I’d seen those things in all the gift shops and always wondered what they were like.
“No present, but would you tell us a story so we can go to sleep?”
I caught my breath. “Okay, but first, you go put on your pajamas and brush your teeth. Get all ready for bed and I will think of what story I want to tell.”
“Don’t hang up.”
I actually had thought I would and he could call back when he was under the covers, but I said, “No. I’m right here. Take me with you.”
I stayed on the phone while he brushed and flossed and changed and climbed in bed, Zoe bounding in next to him. And, when he was all settled, I began.
“Once upon a time, there was a dog named Pup-Pup…”
“And he didn’t have a boy.” The dog in question was tucked in safely on the other side of him from Zoe. She had her own baby, the one that stayed at my house, under her chin, and she hadn’t made another move for Pup-Pup, but we were always careful just in case.
“That’s right. He lived with a doctor, while he waited for his boy to come…” I went on telling the story of how we met, and how we reconnected, leaving out the really scary medical details, and by the time Zoe of the story had turned up with Pup-Pup in her mouth, Ernie and Zoe were sound asleep.