Chapter 20 #2
I arrive home just after 7:00 p.m. Later than I’d intended. Later than Lily needed me if the sounds coming from inside the house are anything to go by.
“I’m watching TV!” Cade yells from the back of the house as I step through the front door.
“You’re not,” Lily says calmly. “You’re finishing your dinner and then you’re going back to your room until your father comes home.
” She might be speaking calmly, but her tone is lethal.
It’s the tone I receive when she thinks I’m being a complete asshole.
The tone that is one step away from pure anger.
“I hate you!” Cade roars. This is followed by the sound of what I suspect is his chair being shoved away from the table and then the back door sliding open and being slammed closed.
“Cade King! Get back inside now!” Lily yells before sliding the door open again.
I stride down the hall, through the kitchen, and into the dining room. “I’ll go,” I say, drawing Lily’s attention.
Her wild eyes meet mine and I see just how close to losing her shit she is. She widens those eyes as she says, “I thought you were going to come home early.”
“I tried. Shit came up.”
Still with the wide eyes, she says, “The next time shit comes up, ignore it if I’ve told you that day that Cade is acting up. Seriously, we are this close to me doing jail time.”
“I can see that.” I glance at the table that has none of our other kids sitting at it. “Where are Travis and Meredith?”
“Safely in their rooms.”
“Okay.” I jerk my chin towards the hallway. “Go and get in the bath. I’ll handle the kids.”
She looks outside briefly before giving me her stormy eyes again. “Cade’s out of control. You need to fix that.”
“Lily,” I say with some force, because fuck knows she’s past the point of taking note of anything less than force. “Go. I’m handling this.”
She pushes a long breath out, giving me that look of hers that says “you better fucking handle this”, and then leaves the room.
Christ.
I step outside in search of my son while working to control my temper.
Out of all our kids, Cade’s the one who never fails to stir it.
He’s too much like me with his temper and preference to deal with his problems physically rather than to sit and talk them out rationally.
Raising him is teaching me all kinds of shit I’m fucking sure nothing and no one else could have because it’s like looking directly in a mirror when I’m with him.
“Cade,” I call as I walk down the stairs. “Come here.”
I’m down the stairs and halfway across the backyard when he meets me. The defiance written all over him is a trait I know well. One I feel in my bones. One that I’m learning is a fuck of a trait to deal with as a parent.
When he crosses his arms and glares up at me, I lift my chin at the wooden bench I built Lily years ago and say, “Sit your ass down. We’ve got a long conversation to have.”
Keeping his arms folded and his glare in place, he fires back, “I don’t want to talk.”
“Yeah, I get it, but neither of us are going to bed tonight until we’ve had this talk, so do me a favour and sit.”
His nostrils flare as his brows pull in. Those arms of his appear to hug his body harder, like he’s doubling down on refusing to budge. Cade’s a smart kid, though, so he knows this shit has to happen. After a few more moments of defiance he caves.
I follow him to the bench and sit next to him.
We sit in silence for a couple of minutes before I look at him. “Did you start a fight with Travis today?”
If there’s one thing I can count on from my boys, it’s loyalty to family to the end.
They may argue and fight daily, but they’ll always be the first to stand up for each other and will never throw each other under the bus.
Travis may only be six, but it’s clear to me that he’s already learned this.
Just like Cade did from his older siblings.
And while loyalty is something I value fucking highly, it makes conversations like this hard because no one wants to own up to anything or blame anyone else.
Cade stares straight ahead and doesn’t answer me.
“I asked you a question, Cade, and I expect an answer.”
He sits in silence and I watch as his brain works like fuck to figure out how to get out of this. I give him the space to think, even though giving anyone space in this way does not come naturally to me.
Finally, he meets my gaze. “We both started it.”
“How so?”
He shrugs. “I don’t know.”
“You do know.”
“I don’t.”
“Well, you better figure it out because neither of us are leaving this bench until you do. And let me tell you, I’m not a fan of sitting on this seat.”
He stares at me. His glare is still in place, as is his scowl. Christ, he’s my fucking son, that’s for sure. “I didn’t start it, but I finished it.”
And fuck if words I’ve said a thousand times, that Cade has probably heard, don’t come back to bite me on the fucking ass.
“You pushed him over?”
He nods but doesn’t give me the words I’m looking for.
“Say it, Cade. Own what you did.”
He doesn’t hesitate this time. He knows I won’t let this go. Taking ownership of their actions is something I’ve drummed into my kids. They don’t always do it straight away, but I always help them get there in the end. Even when it’s painful as fuck to do so. “Yes.”
“Why?”
He knew that question was coming next and he continues glaring at me because of it. Cade hates to admit the why. He’d rather stab himself in the eye than tell us why he did something he shouldn’t have. He gives me one of his shrugs instead of an answer.
I don’t say a thing. I simply arch my brows and wait.
His lips press together before he says, “Because I was angry with him and I knew Mum would take his side.”
This is something new and it causes me to frown. He’s never mentioned anything about Lily taking sides, and as far as I know, she’s never done that. Lily always tries to be fair with the kids.
“Okay, let’s start with why you were angry with him. And we’re not dobbing here, we’re just talking about the facts.” I’ve learned it’s important to differentiate this shit for him if I’ve ever got a hope of getting him to open up.
He pushes up off the bench and kicks the grass as he says in an angry rush of words, “He broke my Batmobile!”
Cade loves Batman and anything to do with Batman.
He and I spent hours building a Lego Batmobile last month and it’s his favourite thing at the moment.
Travis wanted to help us, but for the first time with this kind of thing, Cade wanted to build it with just me. He also wouldn’t allow Lily in on it.
“By accident?” I ask.
A look flickers in his eyes, signaling that he’s struggling with the answer to this question.
I know he’ll give me the truth, though, because if there’s one thing Cade King is not, it’s a liar.
He may withhold information for as long as possible, but he never outright lies to us.
“He was playing with it when he shouldn’t have been. ”
“So, it was an accident?”
He kicks the grass again, his jerky movement showing me how angry over this he is. “He shouldn’t have been playing with it!”
“He should have asked you if he could play with it, I agree, but accidents happen, Cade. This isn’t something that warranted you hurting him.” I narrow my eyes at him. “Why did you think Mum would take his side?”
“Because she always takes his side.”
“No, she doesn’t.”
He pushes his shoulders back. “She does. She always says I have to watch out for Travis. I have to let him win because I’m older. It’s not fair.”
“Win at what?”
“At everything! Games, who gets the TV, fights.”
I process what he’s saying and can understand why he thinks this.
Lily does make allowances at times for Travis while not making the same ones for Cade.
It’s a new thing she’s started doing over the last year since Cade turned nine.
Since deciding he needs to learn more responsibility.
Cade has misconstrued it to some degree, but I can see how he’d misunderstand her intent.
I reach for him, taking hold of his arm and bringing him closer to me. “Your mother loves you. You know that, right?”
He nods, his eyes intense with all the emotion running through him. “Yes, but she never wants to spend time with me anymore like she does with Travis.”
“That’s not true.”
“It is. She was supposed to take me to the museum last week but she didn’t.”
“That was only because I had stuff come up at the club and couldn’t get home for her to take you. She’s still planning on it. She told me she wants to take you on the weekend.”
That gets his attention. “When?”
“Saturday morning. I’m going to stay at home with Travis and Meredith while you two go by yourselves.”
“Will she buy me ice-cream?”
And just like that, I realise Lily and I have work to do here. We’ve been trying to give Cade some space and not treat him like a little kid still, but I can see now that he needs us to go slower on this.
“Yeah, buddy, she’ll buy you ice-cream.”
“Good. And a toy?”
I smile at him as I nod. “And a toy.” An ice-cream and a small toy are the two things we’ve always treated the kids to when we take them somewhere special.
It doesn’t happen often, and clearly it means a lot to Cade.
“But you’re going to have to pull your socks up and stop treating your mother the way you did today and stop fighting with your brother. ”
He looks down at the ground, not responding to that.
I reach for his chin and tilt his face back up. “Do you understand what I’m saying?”
He nods and says, “Yes.”
“Tell me what I mean.”
“I have to stop pushing Travis over and I have to stop backchatting Mum.”
“It’s not just pushing Travis that you have to stop. It’s any kind of physical fight. Hitting, kicking, anything that might hurt him. It has to stop, Cade. That’s not how you treat the people you love.”
He nods again. Remorse fills his eyes, so I know I’m getting through to him.