21. Essa
twenty-one
Essa
S eth's choked gasp is what breaks me from the pure rage I feel toward my sister. She lunged for my Adam. I don't think she would've hurt him, but seeing a male under my care, one I've sworn to protect, being threatened was enough to have my full nature come out.
I've always been stronger than my sister. We rarely fought one-on-one unless it was over normal sisterly things, and it's never been this bad.
I step away from Niivi, releasing her at the same time Adam wraps his arms around me, pinning my arms to my body and dragging me toward the wall, where he braces himself as much as he can. Smart male, I'm stronger than him, and he knows it.
This is probably his best chance if he wants to keep me trapped. He can't hold me for long if I fight him, but it's enough time for the other Haventh in the room to help him subdue me if they were thinking of doing that. Neither of my concubines has venom they can inject in me to keep me from feeling the effects of other Haventh's venom, so I'd be much more vulnerable if I weren't as strong as I am.
Instead, as my fangs begin to retract and my mood starts to lift, Iddis rushes to my sister, cupping her face between his hands, checking to make sure she's okay. I want to snarl and snap my teeth at him for touching Niivi, for trying to think he could still force himself into a head position in this family. Niivi leans into him, accepting the comfort in his touch, and oh–
"Wait," I murmur more to myself than to anyone else.
Seth's still in his chair, frozen in place, probably because my eyes are still constricted, and Iddis looks more than a little angry. My poor human is petrified, and I can't even go to him because then I'll have to interrupt whatever moment Niivi and Iddis are having. A moment I'm just now realizing isn't Iddis trying to take advantage of the situation.
"Yeah, your sister has the hots for your fiancé," Adam growls behind me, his teeth still gritted tight like he's flexing all his muscles in case I try to escape his hold.
I push one of his arms off me easily, ending the charade that he could contain me and earning me a metaphorical dagger thrown at me through his eyes. He's cute when he thinks he's strong. Maybe I'll let him pretend to be strong after this misunderstanding is finally put to rest.
"In our defense, we didn't think you'd come back before the vows were said," Iddis bites toward us, his melodic voice shifting to something more harsh as his anger fades enough for him not to be fully lost to his base instincts.
"We're not supposed to talk of it," Niivi says, pushing at Iddis's hold now that everyone has begun to calm down. Even Seth is back to eating something from his plate, his fear response fading now that we're all in control of our scary faces.
"And what has not speaking of it rewarded us with?" Iddis asks her.
He keeps his hands on his shoulders once he's sure she's okay and stands to his full height, his tail snaking around her ankle, flicking briefly against hers even as she tries to step away from the gesture. Iddis only smiles at her attempt to retreat and steps toward her, making it clear to us all that he's claiming her in the only way he can. It has my own tail flicking around to find one of my males to touch. Adam, for once not being a pain, notices the agitated movements and steps close enough I can latch to him.
"Enough of these secrets," I say, stepping toward my sister and Iddis, hands out by my sides and open to hopefully show I'm no threat. I look at my sister, the tears rimming her eyes, the defeated slump in her shoulders. "Our parents kept many, and we promised we wouldn't do that to one another."
I remind her of our silly little vows to one another growing up. No secrets, no lying, no scheming. Though it seems all those vows have fallen to the wayside now that we're fully grown.
"What does it matter now." Niivi wipes at her eyes in harsh motions, her lips pulling back enough to show off her sharp fangs. They aren't descended, so she isn't too upset, but she's making it clear she's unhappy with all of this.
"It matters because your sister is doing what she thinks she needs to do to protect you," Adam says, moving to stand in front of me, ignoring how my tail tightens on his ankle to get him to shut up.
He's too antagonistic and will upset Iddis if he truly cares about my sister. Adam wouldn't want anyone to speak to me that way, but he sure doesn't seem to mind speaking that way to everyone else. Granted, he would also speak this way to me, so at least he's consistent in his treatment of others.
"Protect me?" Niivi says, almost like she's been slapped in the face, which makes me more upset than the way Adam's talking to her. "From what?"
"From an unhappy marriage, a loveless life with someone you don't like, and probably the whole part where all your daughters are sent to a whole other place to live," Seth says with a shrug before tossing another piece of fruit into his mouth. It's a very sour delicacy here on Haven III, so when he plops a whole mouthful into his mouth and bites down even I wince at how sensitive his teeth will be to it.
No one is surprised when he spits it back into his hand, his eyes glaring accusingly at me as though I wanted him to eat the entire thing when it is well known one is supposed to cut it into small morsels to eat with sweeter things. He's not good at being angry at me, though, and his half-hearted scowl turns into a soft smile before long.
My sister is more interested in his words than his nearly dying from too much sour in his mouth, but before she can move the conversation in a more productive direction, Iddis interjects. At least neither is laughing at Seth's misfortune like I'm sure Adam is doing in their shared mind.
"My family is no longer interested in my daughters. I've made it clear that any young I have, stay with me. My brother, much more reasonable than my parents ever were, has agreed to my terms."
I have many questions about Iddis's statement, especially since I remember the need to split up the young as an important part of the deal between our families. I've been gone for a long time, though, and maybe they got bored of waiting for young who were never going to be born since I was never coming back. Those are questions for another time. Right now, I need to assuage some of the worry I can see on Niivi's face.
"Wait, Essa, why are you here?" Niivi asks, her voice quiet, almost hopeful.
I tilt my head to the side, unsure if my sister hasn't figured it out in all this time. I guess it makes sense she wouldn't. I left when she was still considered a child, and our communications since then have been few and far between, though not for lack of my trying.
"I came here to marry Iddis so you wouldn't have to."
Niivi makes a sad little sound in the back of her throat before letting her head hang. I don't like the tears falling down her face, but Iddis likes them even less. His hands are back on her cheeks, wiping away the wetness and trying to calm her.
"I think we should all sit down, have a nice breakfast, and maybe talk through what exactly is going on," Seth says, trying to keep his voice light even though tensions are still high.
I agree with what he's suggesting, though, and guide Adam to a seat near Seth. I sit in the one between them, knowing I need to touch both after what just happened. I don't like that they saw me almost lose control.
It takes Niivi and Iddis a little longer to sit, but Niivi has stopped crying when they do. Iddis makes sure she's sitting comfortably before joining the rest of us. He throws his hand over the back of her chair, offering her comfort during all of this.
How could I have been so blind to their interactions yesterday? It's almost embarrassing now that I think back on how they weren't hiding their feelings for one another, and I still thought it was Iddis being a sneaky male using whichever of us he could to gain more power.
"I think maybe we should start at the beginning." I offer my sister a small smile. "I think there's been secrets for a long time now, and I'm sure part of that is due to my absence."
Niivi tosses her hand in the air, waving away my words or maybe the blame I'm placing on myself. "If you had returned before mother and father passed, we both know you'd be marrying Iddis."
"And I no longer will be?" I ask.
Iddis sighs as he rolls his shoulders. His golden eyes are sparkling when he looks at me, making me wonder how long he's been with my sister. How long have they been sneaking around?
"Niivi and I grew close after your parents asked me to remain in their custody until you returned. They thought since you had left and the wedding would be postponed until your return, my parents would offer my hand to another house in exchange for the same deal they made with your family."
I roll my eyes at the reminder of the deal between our families. Not only was I to marry a male I didn't like, let alone love, I was to be nothing but a vessel to bring the family children. Females would be sent to Iddis's family while the males would stay with mine. I could only guess what purpose that decision was made for. The heads of my family were not open in their plans for the success of our family or the land we were in charge of.
"So, you never returned to your family?" I ask, curious to know how Iddis feels about being separated from his loved ones, as I was, though mine was self-inflicted.
"No, I didn't. My brother took control of the house years ago when my parents passed. He requested my return, but your parents weren't inclined to lose the binding of our houses. I didn't mind. It's not like I enjoyed being at my home often. I was here more often than not when we were growing up."
Iddis talks as though he's reminding me of fond memories and not his uncanny ability to annoy Niivi and me every moment of every day he was here. And poor Niivi took the brunt of his mischief.
"I can tell you remember things differently than I do," Niivi tells me, reading the expressions on my face so easily as though we haven't spent the last ten years apart from one another. "Iddis has been nothing but kind to me since he matured past rigging traps and tricks around the palace. He learned there are better ways to show interest in a female."
Seth opens his mouth and leans forward like he's about to ask about those tricks and traps, but I get my question out before he can. "How long have you two been together?"
Niivi coughs as if I've brought up some scandalous topic. It doesn't matter that it's what we've been talking about without directly discussing it since we all sat down. It's easy for me to forget that there are customs on Haven III and social norms that one doesn't cross.
"Essa, that's not–" Iddis starts to chastise me, much to my males' annoyance.
There's an energy radiating from Adam to snarl or snap or say something counterproductive to this conversation. It's Niivi who cuts Iddis off, though, which is good. We don't need a repeat of the events from earlier if Iddis tries to turn his tone on my mates or, even worse, if it looks like he might lunge for or attack one of them.
"It's fine, Iddis," Niivi says, offering him a small smile before turning back to me. "Probably seven years ago was the first time we admitted there might be something between us."
"Seven years?" I ask, my eyes wide, my voice disbelieving.
My sister has liked this male for seven years, and I'm just now hearing about it? She used to tell me the moment she became infatuated with a male when we both lived in the palace.
I can remember her running to tell me she met her future husband the day a new family came to stay with us, and she caught a glimpse of their steward as he was helping to unload their belongings. To know she was keeping a male a secret from me for seven years feels almost impossible and has my whole world spinning.
We were so close, and then I ran. It should make sense that she wouldn't feel as comfortable telling me about crushes as she got older, especially with me being galaxies away. But she has been in a secret relationship with Iddis for years. I think that should've been brought up at some point.
"Why didn't you ever tell me?" I ask, but then a more important question takes precedence. "Is this why you never took me up on my offer to leave Haven III?"
Niivi bites her lips, amusement lighting up her eyes. At least there's no hard feeling for the fight we got into earlier, and her tears have all dried up. "Essa, not everyone wants to spend their lives in space, especially not sharing a ship with… how many are in your crew now? The last time you updated me was months ago, right before you visited Earth."
"You read my updates?" I ask, leaning forward, eager for her response.
I write many messages to my sister, but her responses are few and far between. I always assumed our parents were interfering with her messages and her ability to message me back.
"Of course I do." Niivi looks at me as though I've grown another set of horns. "Mother and Father monitored my messaging habits, at least on the comm I used to communicate with you. It was easier to keep my relationship with Iddis hidden. They were concerned you would try turning me against them as well."
I snort at that description of our parents and how true it seems to fit for how they would've been too distracted by my whereabouts and whether or not I was coming home to fulfill my duty. At least it helped my sister in some way.
"Well, there is much to catch you up on," I tell her while I twist my fingers together.
I have a request to ask her, but I'm unsure how she'll take it, considering we aren't as close as we used to be. Seth places his hand on my shoulder, giving it a reassuring squeeze, reminding me that he and Adam are there. They'll always be there, and they'll support me through anything.
"I was wondering if you wouldn't mind if I assisted with wedding preparations." I swallow hard, my eyes planted firmly on my fingers as they wrap around one another.
Iddis clears his throat. My eyes snap to him, thinking somehow I've overstepped and this him gently correcting me. Instead, he's looking at Niivi, who now has fresh tears rimming her eyes.
"Yes, please, so long as you're not asking so you can be the one to marry him when we finish getting everything set up." Niivi adds a wet chuckle to the end of her statement, and it takes everything in me not to clamber over the table to wrap her up in my arms.
"I promise, you and your male are safe from me," I tell her, sniffling softly as I wipe the tip of my nose where it's grown itchy.
"Unless we attempt anything with your males," Iddis reminds me with an amused laugh. "I don't think you can make any promises there."
"No, I suppose not," I say, looking between my males. Adam's still scowling, though it looks like he's having to force it more than usual. Seth's happy as can be, munching away on a pastry while listening to my family drama finally work itself out. I suppose he and Adam could be talking about the rest of us in their mind.
"I need to get my males situated in the room since they won't be able to roam without me," I tell Iddis and Niivi. "When I finish with them, can I meet you in your room?"
"Of course, yes," Niivi says, wiping at the moisture in her eyes one final time. "Iddis can stop by and make sure they're keeping themselves entertained if you'd like. Maybe he can show them around the palace if they won't get into too much trouble."
I immediately turn to Adam, who has the audacity to quirk a brow at me. "No, I don't think that's necessary. Adam enjoys picking fights he knows he'll lose."
Adam opens his mouth to argue, his eyebrow quirk dropping back to his scowl as he turns to face me, not liking that I called out exactly what he does. Or maybe he doesn't like that he'd lose any fight he tried to pick here on Haven III.
"I can keep him safe enough," Iddis says, slapping the table like he's decided that taking my males out to visit the rest of Haven III, or at least the palace grounds, is a great idea.
I can only shake my head and hope that the males don't get up to mischief when it's the three of them alone together. I think only Seth will be the voice of reason, and he folds to Adam's demands much too easily.
Oh well, that's worries for another time. Right now, I need to get my males back to my room so I can paint them in case anyone thinks of touching what's mine when they aren't under my watch.
I grab a few pastries from the table for myself before securing Adam and Seth's leashes to my belt. Then we return to my bedroom, and I try not to get too excited about being alone with them again.