28. Adam
twenty-eight
Adam
T his is bullshit.
I project the thought into Seth's mind over and over again, waiting for him to respond to me even once. He's just sitting on the other side of Essa, eating and listening to the chattering around us as though we weren't promised we'd only be at the reception long enough to congratulate the newly married couple, and then we were leaving.
We've been sitting at this table for at least an hour as Essa introduced her crew to her sister. They've exchanged congratulations already, shared stories of their time apart, and made plans for our next visit. I'm currently not paying attention to Sloane trying to convince all the other females at the table to go dance.
If you spent less time sulking and more time smiling, maybe you'd be having a better time.
Seth's words cut through my definitely not sulking, and I attempt for the hundredth time today to cross my arms over my chest just to remember the paint at the last moment and stop myself from smudging it. Essa notices the action and how I snarl at my arms in displeasure. She reaches over and wraps her fingers in mine, soothing some of my anger.
"I think we'll need to leave soon," Essa says, her voice almost sad at the prospect.
I should be rejoicing that we're leaving this place and hopefully returning to our room on the ship. The pleasure crew room because there's no way the three of us will fit in Essa's closet of a room.
I shoot a glare at Alik when I remember the room Essa had on the ship like it's his fault she had the smallest room. Essa's had to tell me multiple times when I rant about the size of her room that it was her choice because it was just enough for her. She lived her early life with exorbitant wealth and didn't need more than she had on the Jolly Folly, and she said guarding a small space was easier than a larger one. Her reasons make sense, but I still don't like it.
Alik's lips turn downward when he sees my expression, but he just shakes his head and continues speaking with Jovi about something. Essa pulls on my hand and drags my attention away from being upset with Alik and the other crew for her tiny room.
I don't like that her usual happiness has been dulled at the idea of leaving so soon. And because I apparently do nice things for my partners now, I do something that surprises everyone at the table.
"Dance with me," I tell Essa, tugging on her hand when I stand.
I can't drag her toward the dance floor since she's stronger than me, but I can encourage her. Other Haventh couples are all paired off and dancing some sort of ballroom dance that I don't know the steps to.
"You wish to dance?" Essa asks, her eyes going wide. She looks at me like I've gone mad. I might take offense to her surprise if not for the fact that no one here is more surprised by my actions than me.
"I wish to dance."
This time, when I pull her, she follows after me. My collar is still fastened around my neck, but I released my leash from her belt when we sat down to eat and talk. I heard more than a few gasps, but Essa only latched her tail around my ankle and shot a few glares at Havenths at other tables.
"Do you even know how?" Essa sputters, but she can't hide her excitement. We've barely stepped onto the dance floor when she spins me around to face her, placing a hand on my shoulder and another in my hand.
"I think you'll need to lead," I tell her, fighting the smile threatening to pull at my lips.
It's not that I don't want her to know that I'm happy. But I do have an image to uphold. One that's purpose is sorely dampened if it's proven that I enjoy dancing with my beautiful female.
"First, you ask me to dance, and now you ask me to lead without a fight?" Essa asks, her brows raised in faux concern. Next, she's going to be asking me if I feel all right or if some other creature has taken me over my body. "Who are you, and what have you done with my surly male?"
How cliché.
I tighten my hand on her waist, pulling her closer to me than any other Haventh men on the dance floor have their partners. Essa could easily decide she doesn't want to be this close, but she doesn't.
She likes the affection Seth and I show her in front of everyone. Enjoys knowing Seth and I want everyone to know that she's ours. And because I need to remind her that I'm still an asshole even when I'm being sweet, I make sure to rub my chub that's slowly rising to full salute right up against her bare hip where her dress doesn't cover.
Essa hits my shoulders, her face showing off how scandalized she feels more than what we're actually doing ever could.
"Stop that."
"Stop what?" I cock my head to the side, rubbing against her again as my fingertips bite harder into her.
I thought my antics would get a rise out of her in the way of constricted pupils and maybe a bite, but her pupils are blown out, her fangs long but dry. She licks at the tips, and I want to guide her head to my shoulder so she can bury those fangs in me. Of course, as soon as I reach up and tunnel my fingers gently between her braids, the music stops, and Seth stands in our periphery, waiting for his dance.
"Which of us do you want?" Essa asks, her voice strained as my fingers tighten on her hair once, giving it a quick little tug before I release her.
I turn to head back to the table but am grabbed before I take even the first step.
"I'm taking one with you first," Seth tells me as he spins me around to face him and Essa again. She's watching us with unfocused eyes, her tail lazily twitching behind her. If we weren't in a crowd of people, I think our girl would be getting off while watching us dance.
"Neither of us knows how," I tell Seth, keeping an eye on Essa to make sure she doesn't mind us doing this without her.
It's not like we can dance together very well. At least not in a way that would be appropriate for the event. I wouldn't mind squishing Essa between our bodies while we grind against her. Fuck I wouldn't mind if it was Seth between Essa and me. I make a mental note to talk to them about it.
Already planning on it. Seth says, telling me I'm too open with all my thoughts. I've become lazy in locking my thoughts away, especially the ones pertaining to him and Essa.
"You don't need to know how," Essa tells us, stepping back once, twice.
She looks over her shoulder to where our seats are. The table is mostly empty now, and the crew is dancing with their partners or off doing something else.
She turns back to face us, her fangs digging into her lower lip before she speaks again. "You are granted more liberties when entertaining me." She pauses to let her eyes flick down our bodies to the pristine paint across our chests and slightly smudged on our arms. All the way down to where I'm fully hard and tenting these too thin pants. "So, entertain me."
My lip twitches at the command. I tug Seth into my body in one swift motion, bringing our lips together. He startles at first before allowing his body to melt into mine. The paint on our chests smears together, blurring the perfect lines Essa spent so long drawing on us earlier.
When Seth tries to pull away, I let him but keep an arm banded around his lower back, keeping our bodies close. The music isn't anything that could warrant the type of dancing we're doing, but we find our rhythm anyway. Our lips find one another as our bodies grind together.
The rest of the reception fades away until it's just Seth and me, body against body, achy cock against stupid loose fabric, and a smile on my lips, no matter how much I try to fight it. We don't even stop when the music ends. Instead, we attempt to go for more until a sparkling gold hand wraps around Seth's leash and tugs his attention away from me.
I should be angry, should gnash my teeth at her, but I don't. No, I smile like an idiot as Essa tugs Seth out of my grasp and wraps him up in hers.
I step away, wiping my bottom lip. I can't help but stand there and watch them move together. Essa isn't as blatant in her grinding as Seth and I were, but I'm assuming there are still standards she has to follow. She accepts Seth leaning against her in that needy way he does when he's ready to move things to a bed or table or floor. Essa loves it as much as I do.
The ability to comfort and soothe, to have someone purposely rely on you that much. It's a wonderful gift that Seth gives us both.
Her golden fingers disappear in his curls as she leans down and runs her fangs along the slope of his neck. Our eyes lock for a brief moment, and I offer her a slight nod, letting her know this is right. It might not be conventional by human standards or her own culture, but it's ours and perfect for us.
Her eyes crinkle in the corners. I assume because of Seth's whimpering like a wounded animal. He needs it bad right now.
Instead of interrupting them and convincing Essa that now we should get back to the ship, I make my way back to the table, allowing her as much time as she needs to get Seth as sensitive and worked up as she wants.
The table is empty when I sit down, and I spend a few minutes watching Essa and Seth in the crowd. They're too far in for me to see much of what they're doing, but I have a good imagination, and Essa isn't about to do more than Seth and I did out there, even if the two of them are feeding off each other's neediness.
My sweet, beautiful seclusion is interrupted way too soon by Alik leaning a little too close to where I'm sitting. I pretend not to notice him, but that only leads to him clearing his throat. On the third throat clear, I finally turn to look at him, realize my eye line is level with his groin, and narrow my eyes as I tilt my head back.
"Yes?" I ask, curious about what could be so important that he felt the need to speak to me when neither of my buffers is here.
When he speaks, I expect irritation in his voice, but he keeps his tone level when he asks, "Are you staying on the ship?"
"That was the plan."
There was never a question in my mind once I decided Seth and I were staying with Essa. We go wherever she goes. At first, that meant Haven III, but then it meant back onto the ship. Now, I'm not quite sure that we're welcome.
Okay, Seth's probably welcome with open arms. It's me that's going to be given a cold reception if I'm given one at all.
My hands start to shake, so I clasp them to the armrest so tight I'm sure my knuckles are pale. My heart is racing, and I need Seth here. I'm about to lose my shit if Alik tells me I'm not welcome on the ship. I can't be separated from them. I won't be separated from them.
A hand lands on my shoulder. One much stronger than Seth's and much bigger than Essa's. My vision is blurred, the telltale buzz under my skin that I'm about to go batshit on someone if I'm not calmed down soon.
"It's okay."
Alik's kneeling in front of me. He must've pushed my chair away from the table so he had the space. I can't read his expression. Really, he's just a fuzzy purple blob, but he's too close.
The wood arms creak under the pressure I'm putting on them. Where the fuck is Seth? He should be reading my emotions and know I'm about to lose it.
I'm right here. His voice sounds distant, like an echo in my mind, but it's real, and it's there, and I cling to it. If you swing on him now, I think it might be the only time he lets you get away with it. He thinks it's his fault you're spiraling.
The laugh that escapes my lips is more of a bark, but it does break through the anger surging through me—the need to fight someone, anyone, to get this feeling out of me. Alik leans back on his heels, his face less blurry as the anger dissipates. I slump in the chair, my breath coming out in ragged heaves as I try to calm myself all the way back down.
"Where are they?" I ask. My tone is too harsh, but Alik doesn't seem to take offense.
"Dancing, I think," he tells me as he looks over to the dance floor. "Do I need to go grab them for you? Will that help with your distress?"
"My distress." I huff at the description.
Alik watches me for a moment, his three eyes looking at me so hard it's like he's trying to get in my head like Seth is.
Oh no, that mind is all mine. Seth's voice is lazy and lust drunk.
"You care for my friend?" Alik asks, drawing my attention away from telling Seth that I want him naked, in a bed, and underneath me right this second.
"What?" I ask, not understanding why he'd ask such a stupid question when I have a collar around my neck on a planet I never intended to visit. "Of course I do, what kind of idiotic–"
Alik's gaze turns hard, and even though I want to keep needling him, I stop myself. The reminder that I might not be welcome on the ship is still blaring like an alarm bell in my mind, threatening to make me explode for real if it turns out Alik is about to tell me that Essa and Seth are welcome, but I'm not.
"Did you know we've had long debates about whether or not to allow you on as part of the crew?" he asks with an even tone, which doesn't help me decipher whether or not their debates ended in my favor. "You should look at Essa's whiteboard sometime. It was the deciding factor in making you part of the crew. Sloane wants her best friend to be happy, so she'll be happy." He raps the knuckles of his lower hand on the table once before standing back up to his full height.
"Wait, did you say I'm part of the crew?" My voice sounds like it's coming from outside of my body. Like I'm not even speaking the words.
Alik either doesn't hear me because he's too busy looking over the dance floor for his mate, or he's decided to leave my question unanswered. Either way, I know I heard him correctly.
He heads back over to the dance floor, leaving me slumped in the chair with a whole lot of things to think about. The relief I feel is immeasurable, and I don't even know how to voice it, let alone figure out how I'm supposed to thank the crew. I don't know if I have it in me or if they'll even believe the words if they fall from my mouth.
"You can worry about thanking them later," Seth tells me.
His hand is on my shoulder, Essa's fingers wrapped in my leash. I was so busy in my mind I didn't see them approaching. The look on their faces tells me I won't need to worry about anything other than them for a good long while, though.
I let Essa drag me out of my chair and stumble after her as she leads us back to her bedroom. We have to stop every hallway so she can kiss one or both of us, or so Seth and I can do the same. At one point, we get so worked up switching between one another that we almost fuck up against one of the paintings.
"What did Alik want with you?" Essa asks as she shuts the door to her bedroom behind her. Seth is already crawling into the bed, lying on his back like he won't have to do any work tonight.
"Nothing important," I tell her, watching Seth frown at my answer. Essa tugs on my chain until I'm right up against her, her nails scratching my cheeks as she grabs my face. I like it when she's rough with me. It means I get to be rough with her, too. "I want to see your whiteboard, princess."
Her eyes widen into saucers, giving me the perfect opportunity to grab her by the horn and drag her lips back to mine. Like I said, those are worries for another time. Right now, we only have to worry about pleasing one another.