Chapter 18
I made love to Essence again and again, all through the night and into the morning,
And it still wasn’t enough. I wanted more. I needed more. Desire drove me. Consumed me.
It was wild how Essence had gotten under my skin, burning me up from the inside out, making me feel like I was losing control.Damn . I tried to catch my breath and make sense of it all, but even with her lying beside me, satisfied and asleep, I still felt something deeper than the physical. It wasn’t just about the sex—it was like this peace settled inside me, something I hadn’t felt in years. Essence had done something to me that no other woman ever had. She made me feel whole as if I didn’t even know I was incomplete until she showed up.
I stared down at her face, soft and relaxed in sleep, and it hit me. Since Carmen, I’d thrown every woman I met into the same box—manipulative, untrustworthy. I had locked my heart behind a steel door, swearing I’d never fall for that trap again. Love wasn’t for me, or so I thought. But with Essence, things were different. She came into my life and flipped everything upside down.
I reached out, gently brushing my fingers along her face, just taking in her beauty. She was different and special in a way I hadn’t expected. I never thought I’d feel this kind of connection with a woman again, both emotionally and physically. A weight settled in my chest—something that felt like love, but I wasn’t ready to admit that yet. All I knew was I didn’t want to let her go. I pulled her closer, her body fitting perfectly against mine, and held her tight, like maybe if I held her close enough, she could feel what she meant to me.
* * *
I dreamed that someone was kissing me, and then I opened my eyelids to find it wasn’t a dream after all. Mark lay beside me, showering my forehead with soft, wet kisses.
“Good morning,” he said, grinning. I turned my head to face him and smiled.
“Good morning.” I briefly closed my eyes and opened them again. “How long have you been up?”
“Long enough to watch you drool all over your pillow,” he teased lightly.
I shot up off my pillow. “I don’t drool!”
Mark’s brow rose. “Okay... whatever you say.”
Appalled, I playfully swung at his chest. Mark filled the air with hearty laughter as he blocked each punch. He overpowered me, then rolled me gently onto my back and pinned both arms above my head.
“Just kidding, sweetheart,” he whispered as he kissed my neck. “I enjoy watching you sleep.” His lips perused my neck. “You looked so beautiful I couldn’t take my eyes off you.” His mouth traveled around and captured my lips.
I felt his penis throbbed against the inside of my thighs, causing blood to pump faster through my veins. Goodness , I wanted him again.
“Mmm, you taste good,” Mark murmured as his lips traveled from my mouth, down my neck to my collarbone, and finally to my nipples. He skimmed his teeth and his tongue over the peak. I almost came off the bed when I heard Tyler’s voice coming through the baby monitor.
“Uh oh, Tyler’s awake,” I whispered.
“I thought that cooing was you,” he murmured.
The sun was barely up, casting this soft, golden glow through the curtains, lighting up Mark’s face in a way that made my heart do flips. I couldn’t stop staring at him. He looked at me, and his smile melted everything inside me—it was wild.
“Oh my God,” I whispered, half to myself. “Mark?”
He looked at me, his eyes warm, like he was just as caught up in the moment as I was. “What’s up, sweetheart?”
“It’s Christmas,” I said, almost in disbelief. It had snuck up on us as we got so wrapped up in our little world that the holiday had just...arrived.
Mark’s face lit up, and his grin—playful and just a little mischievous—spread across his face. “I guess it is. Let’s go get Tyler.”
He leaned in and kissed me quick and sweet, enough to send a rush of warmth through me. We jumped out of bed, laughing like kids, like we were the ones waiting for Santa. I yanked on my robe. Mark pulled on his pajama bottoms, and we slipped down the hall to Tyler’s room, still giggling like we had some secret.
Mark scooped up Tyler, and I stood there for a second, watching them. “I’m gonna put some coffee on before we start,” I said.
“Good idea,” Mark said, setting Tyler in his playpen. “I’ll grab my camera from the car.”
I had almost forgotten that photography was his hobby. I watched Mark head outside, slipping into his shoes and coat. Through the window, I saw him grinning like a little kid in the snow. When he returned inside, Christmas cartoons were playing, and the tree was lit up in the living room like it was ready for the magic to begin.
“Ready?” I asked, my heart pounding with excitement.
“More than you know,” he said, eyes locking onto mine.
Mark shrugged off his coat, scooping Tyler up again, and carried him over to the tree. “Merry Christmas, Champ,” he whispered, and I swear, my heart just about burst.
I sat beside them, watching Tyler reach for this big red Fisher-Price cell phone. He held it to his ear like he’d seen me do a hundred times, and I couldn’t stop the giggle that slipped out. Mark laughed, too, snapping pictures, capturing every moment.
This went on for what felt like forever before Mark finally put down the camera and laced his fingers with mine. The look in his eyes made my pulse race.
“Thank you,” he said, his voice soft, full of something deeper than just words.
“For what?” I asked, barely able to speak.
“For making this the best Christmas,” he said, and I could feel the emotion in his voice, the way it was about so much more than just today.
“I’m glad you’re here to share it with us,” I whispered.
Mark leaned in, his breath warm against my ear. “I hope I get to share many more.”
Without saying a word, I crawled over to the tree, reaching behind it to pull out a box I’d hidden the night before. When I handed it to Mark, he raised an eyebrow, looking surprised.
“What’s this?” he asked, shaking his head like he couldn’t believe it.
“Open it,” I said, my heart racing.
Mark unwrapped it slowly, revealing a framed collage of photographs I’d collected of Tyler from the day he was born. I watched as his eyes softened, filling with emotions I hadn’t expected.
Before I knew it, he pulled me onto his lap, holding me close, his lips brushing against my ear. “You know I’m dying to thank you properly,” he teased, his voice full of that familiar warmth.
I couldn’t help but smile. “At ease, soldier,” I giggled, but my voice betrayed me—I was just as affected as he was.
He chuckled, pulling me even closer, his body warm against mine. “Too late for that,” he whispered, making sure I knew what he meant.
I raised an eyebrow, trying to play it cool. “And what are we gonna do about that?”
“I’ve got a few ideas,” he said, his voice dropping to that deep, serious tone that always got to me.
Tyler toddled over, planting a sweet kiss on my cheek, breaking the moment in the cutest way possible. I laughed, scooping him up and kissing him back. He wiggled out of my arms and went back to his toys.
Mark smiled, reaching behind him to pull out a small velvet box. “I’ve got something else for you, too,” he whispered.
I shook my head, laughing softly. “You’ve already given me a gift.”
“And now I’m giving you another.”
I opened the box, revealing a gold chain with a small key, the eye of the key sparkling with a diamond. I ran my fingers over it, speechless.
“You know, don’t you?” Mark asked, his voice serious.
“Know what?” I asked, my heart pounding in my chest.
“That you hold the key to my heart.”
Mark’s words hung in the air, heavy with meaning. I wanted to say something, but the words wouldn’t come. Maybe because I wasn’t sure if he meant me or Tyler, but for now, I didn’t care. Today wasn’t about figuring everything out. Instead, I decided to leave well enough alone for now and focus on having an unforgettable Christmas.