Chapter 19
Paisley’s hands shook as she rushed for Violet’s room. She fumbled her phone twice before she got a good grip on it. Then she speed dialed Ethan, thankful he’d put himself into her favorites. He picked up before it even rang.
“I’m on the way. Don’t go outside. Don’t open the blinds or look out where he can see you. Stay calm and I’ll be there in ten minutes.”
Paisley dragged in a breath. Her heart fluttered like a trapped butterfly. Violet was sound asleep in her bed and her room was undisturbed. “Please hurry,” she whispered.
“I’m hurrying, baby. Stay on the line with me, okay?”
“Okay.”
“Just because somebody tripped the camera in your backyard, doesn’t mean it’s Trey. My sources tell me he’s overseas on a job right now.”
She was seeing spots. Fear had its claws wrapped around her throat. Breathe. “How can you be sure?”
“Plane tickets, itineraries.”
“What if he faked it so he could have an alibi?”
It’s exactly the kind of thing he’d do if he wanted to kill her.
Fake a trip, give himself an alibi, show up and murder her and Violet in their sleep.
It was nearly one a.m. Nobody had any business being in her yard at that time of the morning.
So who else could it be? It was definitely a man, not Fern.
Her husband? Was he part of her nasty scheme to harass people she didn’t like?
Ethan was silent. “He could do that. Not gonna lie to you. Doesn’t mean he did, though. Where is the man now?”
Paisley’s fingers shook as she swiped to the app she needed. “He’s not there.”
“Play it back.”
She swiped the screen until she got to the beginning of the video.
The man wore a ball cap and what looked like a thin jacket that covered his arms and torso.
It was big, shapeless, and she couldn’t tell if the man was muscular like Trey or not.
He appeared to hop the back fence. He walked into her yard and stared at the house before poking around the back patio. Then he disappeared.
“He went around the side. Where the bedrooms are.” She was still standing in the door to Violet’s room so she knew he hadn’t come through the window.
“Go to that camera.”
She did as he told her. “He climbed over the fence. I-I think he’s gone.”
Her relief wasn’t complete though. The man might be gone, but he could return. If it was Trey, he had a plan. He always had a plan. She wasn’t safe yet. She would never be safe so long as Trey was out there, biding his time. Why had she thought she could leave him and get away with it?
No.
She’d had to leave. For herself, for her child. Staying would have meant giving up, consigning Violet to a life of abuse and terror. No fucking way.
“That’s good, baby. Just stay where you are and don’t look outside. I’ll be there soon.”
Paisley went into the living room and sank onto the couch before her legs buckled.
She drew her legs up, her chin on her knees while she rocked back and forth and told herself Ethan was nearly there.
Any minute now. He talked to her about the things he saw on the drive.
A herd of deer beside the road, munching grass.
A coyote scooting across the pavement in front of him.
The town limits. The American flags that still hung from the light poles after the Independence Day Festival last week.
“I’m turning on Chestnut now. I’m going to park down the street and have a look around. I’ll text you when I’m at the door, okay? Don’t open until then.”
“Okay.”
“I’m gonna hang up now, Payz. Need to concentrate on what I’m doing. But I’m here. You aren’t alone. You understand me?”
“Yes.”
“Good girl. See you soon.”
The call went dead and she swiped open the security app again.
Her alarm was on, and there was no movement on the outdoor cameras.
Still, she couldn’t look away until she saw a figure appear in the field of view.
He wasn’t wearing a ball cap, and she recognized the swagger.
He walked past her house, crossed the street and disappeared.
When he walked into view again, she let out the breath she’d been holding.
Her phone pinged with a text and she leaped up and went to the door, looking out the peephole as instructed. The porch light illuminated the big man on her stoop.
“I’ve disabled your alarm,” he said through the door. “You can open it now.”
She fumbled with the locks until she had them free, then yanked the door open and nearly burst into tears. Ethan stepped inside, looped an arm around her, and closed the door. He locked everything again and reset the alarm from his phone.
Then he had both arms around her, dragging her in close. She wrapped hers around his waist and held on tight.
“You’re shaking, honey. It’s okay. I’ve got you.”
The second time tonight he’d said that to her. Well, not tonight, but it might as well be since she hadn’t actually gotten any sleep between the time he’d left and now. She’d been reading in bed, hoping she’d get tired, but still juiced from the evening spent with him and Violet.
“I’m sorry,” she said. “Maybe I’m being too paranoid. If this had happened last week, I wouldn’t have known. And it doesn’t mean it was Trey. I know that too.”
He bent and hooked an arm under her knees, swinging her up as if she were a little girl and not a full grown woman.
Paisley wrapped her arms around his neck and pressed her face into the hollow there.
He smelled so good. Like pine and leather tonight.
The gunpowder wasn’t there this time, but it was never far.
Not considering what he did for a living.
He carried her over to the couch and settled down on it with her in his lap. Her insides began to melt like simmering wax. Being this near to him, smelling him, feeling his arms around her—it called up memories of safety and belonging that she hadn’t had in years.
“I didn’t see anyone.” His voice rumbled in her ear. “I checked the yard and I went down the street, crossed to the next, but the only thing out right now are cats and coyotes. And one barky bastard of a dog. I’m sure the neighbors are thrilled about that little nutcase.”
Paisley couldn’t help but laugh a little. “Oh, you mean the dog behind us, at the end of the street. They never walk him, just let him out to do his business and then forget him. He barks his head off until they let him in again.”
“Why have a dog if you don’t want to do anything with it?”
“No idea.”
She plucked at the collar of his henley, smoothed it again. She told herself to get off his lap, put some distance between them. Her heart didn’t need the confusion. Or the temptation.
But she didn’t want to go. Ethan was shelter. He was safe and beautiful, the kind of lethal predator who offered safety and security. She didn’t know why she trusted him not to turn into a Trey, but she did.
She wasn’t sure she trusted him with her heart, not after everything she’d been through, but trust he wouldn’t do anything to harm her?
Absolutely. Not a doubt in this world. Not after watching him with Violet over the weekend and tonight.
He wasn’t faking that kind of patience and gentleness.
She knew enough about abusers to understand how they wormed their way into your life. She’d experienced it first hand.
They were good, so good, at manipulation.
But with Trey, there’d always been something unsettling.
The way he’d maneuver her back to her hurt and anger over Ethan dumping her.
He never let her forget it. He kept it fresh in her mind while soothing and promising he wasn’t that way, that he’d take care of her and her child.
That he didn’t care whose child she was carrying and he didn’t want or need a paternity test to love the baby as his own.
Such a liar.
Ethan’s hand skimmed over her hip, rubbing softly. “Did you get any sleep?”
“Not really. I was reading a book.”
“Mm.”
“I’m sorry if I woke you.”
“Wasn’t you, Payz. It was the surveillance alert.”
She yawned. “Thank you for coming. I was scared he’d try to break in.”
“I’d have called the police if he did. There was no way I wasn’t gonna be here though.”
“Do you think it was Trey?”
“I honestly don’t know. Seems unlikely since he didn’t try the doors or windows. Could have been a teenager taking a shortcut. A neighbor’s kids sneaking out, maybe. The clothing was shapeless enough I can’t tell how big the guy was.”
“There are some teens on Pine, right behind Chestnut. They can be a little rowdy sometimes. Their parents work shifts, so sometimes they’re alone in the evenings. One of them plays on the football team and I’ve seen him in baggy athletic gear. It seems to be the cool thing to wear.”
Why hadn’t she thought of that before? It was a weeknight, but it was summer.
Some kids ran wild during the summer. Then again, did a teenager need a summer vacation to run wild?
Not necessarily. But they didn’t have to be at school right now, which meant they could stay out all night and sleep all day.
And their parents wouldn’t notice it as easily as they would an absent kid from school.
“I’ll have a thorough look around in the morning. Might see something more than I did tonight. For now, though, maybe you should head to bed and get some sleep. I’ll stay out here.”
Her heart dropped. “I want to stay. With you.”
“Honey.” His voice was soft. “You’ll sleep better in bed.”
“I won’t. Not unless you go with me.”
The silence between them was heavy.
“Payz,” he finally said, all deep and rumbly. “I can’t do that. I can’t lie in a bed with you and not touch you. Not be with you.”
“Maybe I want you to touch me.” She tipped her head back to meet his gaze. There was heat in those eyes. Heat and regret. Her heart sank again.
“I want to. Badly. But maybe it’s not the right thing to do now. You just got out of a bad relationship, and we just started getting to know each other again. I don’t want to rush into something and have you regret it.”
“The only thing I regret is that we lost almost five years together. And maybe it won’t be the same, but it could be.” She closed her eyes, thought of everything that’d happened during those years. The pieces of her life she’d lost and would never get back.
Maybe she wasn’t ready for this. Maybe she’d never be ready again. The only way to know was to try.
“Listen to me,” he said. “I want you. I want everything you have to give me. I want you naked. I want to watch my cock disappear inside your luscious body. I want to make you come, and I want you to beg me for more. I want it more than I want my next breath. But this is fucking fast, Payz. Too fast with everything that’s going on in your life.
So let’s slow it down, okay? I’ll stay here tonight, watch over you and Violet.
Hell, I’ll stay every night if you need me to.
But we aren’t gonna fuck yet. We’re gonna talk, spend time together, and I’m spending time with Violet.
You need to know if you trust me with her after what she’s been through. ”
“I know you would never—”
He put a finger over her mouth. “Of course I wouldn’t.
But what if she decides she doesn’t like me after all?
Or she gets scared of me because I remind her of Trey?
I’m bigger than he is, and I can’t promise I’ll never get angry.
Not that I intend to do it in front of her, but what if it happens?
What if Fern says something to you and I get pissed about it?
Or what if some guy thinks he can demand your attention again, and I get in his fucking face?
Can’t guarantee she won’t see that, won’t be scared by it.
And I think, if I carry you to bed now and we get naked, it’ll be more difficult because she’ll know we’re together somehow and yet she won’t really know me. You see where I’m coming from?”
Oh, God. She was completely in love with this man. Again. Still. He cared about her daughter enough to put her needs before his own desire.
Guilt pricked her. She really, really needed to tell him that Violet could possibly be his child. But how did you tell someone they might be a father, but you didn’t actually know it for sure—so maybe they weren’t? How?
And then what? Would he demand paternity tests? Demand partial custody?
She couldn’t face it right now. Simply could not.
“Yes.” The knot in her throat made her hoarse. “Thank you, Ethan. For caring.”
His smile was wistful. “Can’t believe I just talked myself out of sex with a hot babe. What kind of idiot am I?”
She lay against his chest again, snuggled her face into his neck. She wanted to lick him, but she refrained. “A wonderful one.”
He looped his arms around her and pressed his back deeper into the couch. “You going to bed or what?”
“I’m already where I want to be.”
“Me too.”