Chapter 13
Evan
Iknew the sensible thing to do was to walk away. Reid wasn’t in danger, and even if he were, Logan was close by. I had no idea why he’d left Reid for this long, but he’d come running if there was trouble.
That should’ve been my sign that nothing was wrong when Reid called out my name. I’d managed to stand my ground the first time, but the second?
My wolf had given me a choice: either I went over on two feet or he went on four.
Now I was in a situation I was completely unprepared for. Reid had a hand fisted in my shirt, challenge flashing in his eyes. His plump red lips were parted as his chest rose and fell rapidly. Even with the loud music, I had no problem hearing the fast thrum of his pulse.
Little did he know that mine was racing in time with it. Had been since the second he’d called my name. Now? With him touching me? It was like my heart was trying to burst from my chest just to get a little closer to him.
Fuck. I couldn’t keep up with this. I knew he’d had a couple of drinks earlier, but not enough to make him drunk.
Still, he couldn’t honestly want me to dance with him…right?
I finally managed to find my voice again. “What?”
“You said I can dance with whoever I want, and you won’t stop it,” Reid said innocently, his hand spreading wide on my chest as his other came up to join it. “And I want to dance with you.”
Somewhere in the back of my mind, there was a little voice saying this wasn’t a good idea. That this was only going to complicate an already fucked up situation.
Unfortunately, that voice was drowned out by both my wolf and my libido. They didn’t give a shit about the consequences.
They wanted Reid as close as possible.
A dangerous smirk tugged at Reid’s lips as he realised what my silence signified. I wasn’t going to fight this. I wasn’t going to fight him. I didn’t know why he was surprised. He could have asked for my head on a platter and I’d have arranged for it to happen for him.
He pushed one leg between my own as he drew closer. My right leg moved forwards automatically, letting Reid almost straddle it.
I groaned internally at the feel of him there. His weight was so perfectly right.
What the fuck are you doing, Evan?
My hands went to Reid’s waist, encircling it and hauling him even closer. “This what you wanted?”
His fingers flexed against my pecs, drawing a shudder from me. “Yes. Think we’re meant to move though.”
A spark of my old cockiness resurfaced as I smirked down at him. “Moving would make this more fun.”
“I meant dancing, dick.” Reid rolled his eyes, but ruined the effect with the throaty moan that came out with the first roll of my hips. “Fuck.”
I gripped his waist tightly as we began to slowly grind. You couldn’t call it a dance. Not with how my hard cock was brushing against his abs. That wasn’t what was driving me crazy though.
No, it was the fact that Reid was hard. That with every undulation, I felt his erection against my hip.
It had me wanting to drag him into the shadows I’d haunted earlier.
To ignore everything that had happened in the past and lose ourselves in the present.
To press the heel of my hand against him until he came undone.
Or, better yet, go to my knees and see how loudly I could make him moan with my mouth.
I hadn’t looked at Reid like this since realising who he was. Well, in truth, I’d tried not to. Lusting after him after learning about the pain and trauma I’d been responsible for would make me the scum of the earth.
That didn’t mean I was always successful. It was near impossible when Reid was everything I looked for in a man.
Now, with Reid in my arms, the place where I’d kept all those thoughts had been unlocked. My need and want had been set free.
I wasn’t sure if I’d ever be able to trap them again…or if I even wanted to.
I’d spent more hours than I was supposed to outside Reid’s flat, just to be close to him. Only when Logan was guarding him though. Calan and Finlay wouldn’t have tolerated it, but Logan took pity on me. He’d even come outside after Reid had a panic attack to reassure me that he was okay.
Not that that had helped. Just the knowledge that Reid had been hyperventilating over hearing his father’s name had had me punching a tree. It had fallen over during a later storm. Thankfully, not on me, although that would’ve been no less than I deserved.
This was the closest I’d been to Reid since the spider incident. The past few weeks away from him had felt like torture.
Touching him now was the sweetest reprieve.
I had no idea if we were in time with the music, or if there was even a song playing.
All I could see was Reid’s head falling back.
The delicate arch of his throat. The fluttering of his eyelashes.
All I could hear was his breath turning ragged.
The small whimpers he was trying desperately to contain. His heart racing in his chest.
All I could feel was him. Just him.
My wolf had never been more content. He was finally happy with where Reid was.
In our arms, where he belonged.
No, not where he belongs.
That voice was far quieter than it should be. I probably should have been concerned about that.
But I wasn’t. For the first time in weeks, there was nothing clouding my mind. Not the Clarksons and the lack of information I’d been able to extract from Clyde. Not the past and how I’d failed. Not the fury and guilt on Reid’s face every time he saw me.
It was a blissful reprieve from the weight I’d been carrying. The load that had been slowly wearing me into the ground, without me even noticing until it had been lifted.
Reid raised his head suddenly, the movement putting his mouth mere inches from mine. His eyes were wide as his tongue flicked out over his lower lip. God, what I wouldn’t give to feel it against mine.
“Ev…”
I hovered over him. My wolf begged me to close the distance. To claim him as mine.
Fuck it. Maybe it was time I started listening to my instincts where Reid was concerned, rather than trying to bury them.
I didn’t close my eyes as I lowered my lips to his. I didn’t want to miss a second of this.
This kiss was going to change everything. Or maybe everything had changed already, and this would cement it.
But it never happened.
Reid sucked in a quick breath, his hands shoving against my chest. “No.”
I released him immediately. “Reid?”
He was shaking his head, walking backwards to put distance between us. “No, I’m not doing this. I can’t.”
My wolf howled in distress. I didn’t let any of it show on my face. This wasn’t on Reid—it was on me. Once again, I’d fucked everything up. I’d read the situation wrong, just as I had the first time. “I’m sorry, Reid.”
“It’s not—” He cut himself off. The red overhead lights illuminated the taut lines of his jaw. He wasn’t looking at me, his hands in fists at his sides. “Don’t apologise, Ev. I can’t take it.”
I bowed my head. I hated asking this next question, even if it was needed. “Want me to go?”
Reid took a deep breath before he nodded. “Aye. I think that’s for the best.”
I didn’t let him see the pain those words caused. The confusion my wolf was feeling. The odd ache in my chest. It was obvious that Reid was too empathetic for his own good. I didn’t want him feeling guilty for how I was feeling. Especially when this was a situation of my own making.
That didn’t mean I could walk away without saying anything though. “If you need me, just call my name and I’ll come. Remember that, Reid.”
Like the last time, I waited for him to deny me. To say he’d never need me.
But, just like last time, he surprised me.
“I will.”
It was enough. It had to be.
I gave him a final nod before turning to leave the club. At the edge of the dance floor, Logan stepped into my path. “Where are you going? Things were just getting interesting.”
A growl slipped free from me as the realisation hit me. “You set a compulsion net up around Reid.”
“So?” Logan’s expression was innocent. Too fucking innocent. “Just doing my job, keeping him safe.”
“You knew I was here.”
“Obviously. I’d be a shitty spy if I didn’t.”
It was easy to forget this darker side of Logan existed sometimes. He was so blasé and light-hearted, it masked the dangerous mind lurking behind his eyes. “You set the net knowing he’d blame me for it and call me out. You knew we’d end up talking.”
“If I did, you’ll never prove it.”
“Well thanks,” I snapped. “Your grand idea had me fucking things up even more. At this rate, Reid won’t ever want me in his life.”
Logan wasn’t bothered by the fury in my tone, simply twirling the straw in his cocktail as he raised a brow. “Oh? And why would that upset you? I thought this was just about keeping Reid safe.”
His words slammed into me. “It is. Of course it is. What else would it be?”
Logan tutted before patting my chest. “That’s what you need to be asking yourself. Don’t worry though, I’ll be here when you work it out.”
He sauntered off towards Reid, leaving me with nothing but confusing thoughts and an ache in my chest that wouldn’t quit.
Knowing Logan was due to switch with Calan after the club, I didn’t bother going back to Reid’s place. Instead, I made tracks towards the main house. I didn’t shift, walking the eight miles in human form in an effort to burn off some of the restless energy under my skin.
It didn’t work.
As I let myself into my bedroom, I knew it was pointless to try and sleep. My wolf was restless, whining as he prowled within.
He’d finally had Reid where he wanted him, in our arms, only for me to walk away. Which had been the right thing to do.
I wouldn’t lie though—that near kiss was going to haunt me. As was the memory of how his hard length had brushed against me. The breathy sounds he’d made as we gyrated on the dance floor.
I threw myself onto my bed and pushed the heels of my hands against my eyes. It did nothing to erase the image of Reid’s parted lips, the pink tongue I desperately wanted to feel against mine.