Chapter 31 #2
When Evan spoke, he couldn’t hide the anger. It was vibrating through his words. “I can’t believe yer willing to risk Reid’s safety, the clan’s safety, because of how it affects our image.”
Finn dropped his feet to the floor, turning to face us fully.
“Evan, no one is suggesting anything that will put Reid or the clan at risk. Our warriors outnumber the Clarksons’ four to one.
We’re better trained, stronger, faster, and have the home field advantage.
I know it might seem counterproductive, but Logan and Calan are right.
We have to consider the clan’s standing in the community to safeguard our future. ”
Finn’s eyes shone with sympathy. “I understand your concern, Evan, believe me. Chester will be onsite for the foreseeable future too. It’s hard, when you love someone, to do anything that might even remotely put them in danger. But I swear on my immortality that I won’t let any harm come to Reid.”
Okay, now it was my turn. “How about none of you put your immortality at risk?”
Three pairs of eyes burned into me. Seated the way I was on Evan’s lap, I couldn’t see his face, but I knew I had his full attention.
Logan narrowed his eyes. “I think ye need to explain what ye mean by that. Because my brain works a little too fast sometimes, and I don’t like the conclusion it’s arrived at.”
“Neither do I,” Evan growled. “Because if yer about to suggest something fucking idiotic like running away, or going with them just to protect us, then we’re about to have our first big fight.”
I winced. Fuck. That was precisely what I’d been about to suggest. “Technically, our first big fight was that day in the Thistle Do Nicely when you didn’t recognise me.”
My attempt to derail the conversation failed. I let out a squeak as Evan stood, lifting me into the air in one smooth motion. “Excuse me, everyone. Reid and I need to have a little chat. If there are any developments, give me a shout.”
“Will do.” Finn raised a hand, making Evan pause. “Reid, I know Evan’s about to make this abundantly clear, but you are part of our clan now. We will defend you and keep you safe because we care about you, it’s the right thing to do, and we’re stubborn, protective fuckers.”
“Basically, you’ve got no hopes of winning this argument.” Logan winked at me as he tossed his dagger again. “If ye run away, I’ll be tracking ye down right alongside Evan and dragging you back where ye belong.”
“Seconded,” Calan said.
Finn smirked. “Thirded.”
“Thanks, lads,” Evan said, taking us to the doorway. “Appreciate it.”
“Good luck, Reid,” Logan sang out as we stepped into the hall.
Apprehension grew under my skin. “Evan, I didn’t mean—”
“Don’t.” He cut me off harshly. “Not in here. Too many listening ears.”
Evan didn’t say a single word to me as he carried me out of the house and deep into the woods. We came to a tiny cabin on the edge of the loch. It wasn’t locked, and Evan opened it with a flick of his wrist.
The inside was basic but clean. It was just big enough for a single bed, a chest of drawers, and a table. “What is this place?”
“Fishing hut,” Evan said, his tone clipped as he put me on my feet. “We crash here sometimes when we can’t be bothered to go back. Or when we have a muppet of a boyfriend we want to yell at in peace.”
My heart fluttered. “Ye think of me as yer boyfriend?”
“Christ, Reid.” Evan rubbed his hands over his face in frustration. “Of course I fucking do. I told ye I loved ye earlier. Is that not kind of a sign that I’m fully in this?”
I wrapped my arms around myself as I shrugged. “I don’t know. I’ve never had a real relationship before. I dinna know what to expect.”
“Well let’s start with this.” Evan drew closer to me, crossing his arms over his chest. “It means that if ye think I’m gonna let you go with them, run away, or break things off because ye think it’s the best way to keep us safe, then we’re about to have a real fucking problem.”
I bit my lip. I really shouldn’t press this, but it wasn’t like I had the filter to stop it. “You can’t deny that it’s an option. Shouldn’t we be looking at everything that’s on the table?”
“That’s not a fucking option,” Evan growled. His bones snapped, but I wasn’t afraid. Evan would never hurt me. “Anything that puts you at risk is not a fucking option.”
“Evan, you have to think about what matters. The clan, the life and community you’ve all built here, that’s what matters. Your life is what matters.”
“You matter!” His roar was so loud that the walls shook. “You fucking matter, Reid. You.”
Why wasn’t he seeing this from my point of view? I knew he loved me—why, I had no idea—but I was just a human. My life was just a blip on the radar compared to his. “I’m not worth it.”
“Sweetheart”—His voice gentled as he cupped my face—“this is your trauma and fear talking. Believe me, you’re worth everything.
It’s not just me who thinks so, either, or did you miss the fact that every single member of the inner circle thinks the same?
They mean it too, Reid. They want to keep you safe because you’re part of our clan, and we protect our own. ”
I squeezed my eyes shut. Fuck, how I wished that were the case. I wished desperately that I’d been born here instead.
But I hadn’t.
“What if I insist on leaving?” I said finally, needing to know what he’d say. If all his talk about me not being trapped here was just that—talk. “Would ye let me go?”
He exhaled slowly, his eyes briefly closing. When they opened, the resignation there cracked my heart. “Aye, Reid. I would. I made ye a promise that you’d never be held prisoner here, and I’d stand by that.”
Something in me eased even as a foul taste filled my mouth. How had I doubted Evan for even a second? What the fuck was wrong with me?
“We can leave now, if ye like,” Evan said. “I’d ask that you give me a couple of hours to say my goodbyes, but then we can go.”
My brain screeched to a halt. “What?”
“I canna just leave without saying anything,” he said, rubbing my shoulders. “But I won’t take long, and then we can be on our way.”
“On our way?” My voice was so high pitched it didn’t sound like my own. “As in, you’d come with me?”
“Aye. I’m not letting ye go without me, Reid. Especially not with the Clarksons breathing down yer neck.” He smiled tightly. “I can take care of us if they come calling.”
“No.” I shook my head as I stepped back. “No, Evan.”
He frowned. “Ye don’t need to worry, Reid. I know you’ve only seen me in action once, but I’m more than capable of protecting us both.”
“That’s not what I mean,” I yelled, flinging my arm out in the direction of the clan. “Ye can’t leave them, Evan. They’re your family. Your home. This is your life here. What the fuck are you thinking?”
Evan closed the distance between us, his hands going to my hips. “I’m thinking that you’re my home now, Reid. You’re my life. Yes, it’d hurt to leave, but I’d do it if ye asked me. I’d follow ye anywhere.”
“I love you,” I blurted out.
A smile dawned on his face, brighter than any sunrise. “Ye do?”
I nodded rapidly. “Aye. I do. I really fucking do. I love you.”
He whooped, and suddenly I was lifted off my feet. A surprised laugh burst from me as he crushed me to his body.
“I’m so happy ye love me,” Evan said, finally putting me down. “Being in love fucking rocks.”
“It does.” I reached up to touch his chin. “I don’t want us to leave, Evan.”
“You don’t?”
“No.” Tears blurred my vision. “I’d never ask that of ye, Evan. Never.”
He closed his eyes briefly. “You were testing me.”
Shame sluiced through my gut. “Yes. I’m sorry, Evan. I’m so fucking sorry. I don’t even know why I felt the need to ask.”
He brushed a kiss over my forehead. “Probably because you haven’t looked into the therapy we discussed.”
“I’m really sorry I asked.” I leaned against his chest. “I should’ve trusted ye, and I’m sorry. I kind of hate myself a little right now.”
“None of that.” Evan stroked a hand over my hair.
“And no more apologies. I get why you asked, Reid. If our situations were reversed, I would’ve too.
Particularly given the fact I marched ye to a secluded cabin in the middle of nowhere and told ye that you’d have several wolves pursuing you if you tried to sneak out. ”
“Ye didn’t mean it like that, though.”
“No,” he said softly. “But I’m not surprised that’s how your brain took it.”
“I’ll move therapy to the top of my to-do list.” I let out a bitter laugh. “Assuming we get through whatever the Clarksons have up their sleeves.”
“Oh, we definitely will,” Evan said. “Especially now I know you love me. Ye think I’m going to just let them take that away from us? Absolutely fucking not.”
There was a new feeling in me. One I didn’t recognise. I rubbed at my chest uncertainly, trying to place it.
Oh.
It was belonging.
For the first time ever, I felt like I belonged somewhere. It wasn’t with the McCarthys though, although this place was starting to feel like home.
It was with Evan.
I belonged with Evan.
I celebrated the best realisation I’d ever had by throwing myself at him. I knew he’d catch me.
He always did.
My mouth crashed against his, catching his sudden intake of air. He got on board with what was happening fast, backing me up against the wall.
Pinned between Evan and a hard object was my favourite place to be. Nothing else made me feel the same combination of vulnerable and secure that having his big form surrounding me, holding me in place did.
“Lube,” I said, breaking away with a gasp. “Please tell me there’s lube here.”
Evan’s throat bobbed. “Fuck, I hope so. I’ve never brought anyone here, but maybe Hamish has.”
Given that Hamish was more of a player the rest of the clan combined, I was holding on to hope. I had no idea if he was searching for his mate or running from him. Whichever it was, the result was the same: Hamish having sex with a lot of different people.
Evan put me down for a minute as he rattled around the tiny cabin. I used the time to shove off my underwear and joggers.
When Evan turned, lube in hand, he smirked. “I’m guessing you have a direction you want to take this?”
“Course I do.” I leaned back against the wall and winked. “Bossy bottom, remember?”
“Like I could forget,” he murmured, lifting me off my feet with just one hand. “Dream of it every night before waking up next to you and wishing we lived on our own somewhere.”
Evan’s parents gave us as much space as they could, but it was their home at the end of the day. Unfortunately, the space they did give us wasn’t enough to satisfy either of our libidos. “Maybe we should look into that.”
He paused, his slick fingers nudging my hole. “What? Are you serious?”
“Yes.” I laughed at the absurdity of having this conversation when he was about to prep me. “On the clan lands, obviously, but maybe where no one can hear us.”
Evan cleared his throat. “I love you so much, Reid.”
“I love you too. But if you don’t hurry up and put something inside me, I may have to have a visit with Mr. Dildo.”
“I threw him out,” Evan said, sliding a finger inside me and making me groan. “You don’t need him anymore.”
“Liar.” I gasped as he brushed my prostate. “You wouldn’t do that.”
He smirked, adding a second finger. “Wouldn’t I?”
“Nope.” Fuck, the burn was already so good. That I knew it was only going to get better had me shivering. “Not when you haven’t seen me riding it yet.”
Evan’s pupils dilated. “That’s true. Good thing he’s still safely tucked in the drawer.”
A third finger now. My cock was leaking, staining Evan’s shirt. “Would it be wrong for me to wear this shirt to bed tonight?”
Evan followed my stare down to the dark patch. His growl rattled through me as he replaced his finger with his cock. “Fuck no. You going to sleep covered in my scent and the scent of us together? That’s hot as fuck, sweetheart.”
Our moans mingled as he bottomed out. The stretch was pure bliss, the burn rushing through me. This never got old, regardless of how often we did it.
I suspected it never would. Certainly hoped it wouldn’t.
Evan paused. “You good?”
“Yes.” I wriggled my hips impatiently. “Fuck me, Evan. Don’t hold back.”
He nipped at my lips with a grin. “Love you, bossy.”
My laugh ended on a moan as his hips snapped up. “Fuck.”
“That’s it,” Evan grunted, pulling out before thrusting back in to the hilt. “Take all of me, sweetheart.”
I might like being in charge in the bedroom. Hell, most of the time I needed it. But right now? I was boneless with pleasure, clinging to Evan’s broad shoulders as he did his very best to put me through the wall.
It was a good thing we were miles away from any other shifters, because there was no way I’d have been able to hold back the scream I gave as I came. Evan was almost as loud, falling over the edge seconds after I did.
As we came down, I rested my head on his shoulder. “We definitely need a place further out.”
“Agreed,” Evan panted. “One with lots of walls. And tables. Any hard surfaces, really.”
I lifted my head to grin at him. “We’ll christen them all, baby.”