Chapter 11 Memories #2
Eiji smiled. “Under other circumstances, I would be glad for the assistance, but that would go against the spirit of the game.”
“Indeed!” Nero nodded. “You’re all on your own. But you’ve got an excellent leader here so you should do well.”
Grayson knew that neither man was likely adverse to taking shortcuts or advantage of situations, but only if the stakes demanded it. Otherwise, Nero had always acted honorably.
“So how did you get it?” Grayson asked, eyebrow lifting.
“I am a little old man,” Eiji made his voice sound more decrepit than it was. “Nobody pays attention to me.”
“Please! They fell for that?” Mairead laughed.
“Dear Mairead, you were raised by your grandparents and you have a very kind heart that causes you to see those who are mostly invisible to others. So your view on the elderly is quite a bit different than most people’s,” Eiji reminded her.
That she was raised by her grandparents was news to Grayson.
He wondered why that was the case. Were Mairead’s parents deceased?
Or had they been incapable of caring for her?
And Eiji’s insistence on abrasive Mairead having a good heart was just as revealing too.
Eiji was a good judge of character and he clearly saw that Mairead noticed people that others discounted.
Maybe because she had been discounted all her life.
That would explain her overt arrogance and her fragility at the same time.
“So you just waltzed into the Helm mansion and took these?” Grayson asked, putting the puzzle of Mairead to the side.
“Yes, I acted quite befuddled and confused when I was spotted just as I was leaving. They did not notice the documents I had secreted in my yakata,” Eiji answered and patted his chest.
“How fortunate indeed! Those Vampires should be ashamed. We know that with age comes strength.” Nero shook his head in disgust.
“I portrayed the opposite of strength and, being human, they were content to let me wander in and out,” Eiji said. “Or perhaps they just admired my courage and pretended not to notice.”
“Your balls, you mean,” Mairead giggled. “So the others likely don’t have these blueprints?”
“Unlikely. There was only one copy that I found, but it could have been set out that way to mislead,” Eiji admitted. “So we must be quick to take advantage of our knowledge! Here is what each of you must do–”
Eiji laid out the entire plan for the evening. There was some fuzziness about who would do what when they got to the treasures as they didn’t yet have the blueprints for those places.
“I don’t suppose you can wander in again and just get them for us tonight like you did this one?” Mairead touched the blueprint.
“No, one must not go to the well too often,” Eiji stated. “I will be waiting at this bench here. Once you have the blueprints for the other locations come immediately back to me. I will quickly review them and further our plans.”
“We’re totally going to win!” Mairead did a happy dance.
There was a knock at the door, which had them all turning around.
“Who is it?” Amana asked, frowning.
Nero’s expression tightened. “It’s the reporter who is to accompany you. I had heard that they were assigning people, but figured they wouldn’t…” His eyes went to Grayson and flickered away, “that they wouldn’t have them with everyone.”
“Reporter?” Amana asked. “Why–ah, it’s to document the game and show how interesting and fun being at the academy is. That makes sense.”
Nero was looking at Grayson with dismay. He said, “If you don’t want her with us–”
“Her?” Grayson’s voice was bleak.
He already knew who it was going to be though he did not have his vampiric senses yet.
Rachel.
She knocked again.
“I’ll send her away,” Nero said quickly, knowing that Grayson had been emotionally compromised for two weeks, in part, because of her and their emotional conversation.
It was really my desire to avoid that conversation. I’ve been hiding in Weryn Palace for two weeks. I can hide no longer. I need to face this. Not that we’ll have much time to talk anyways.
“No, it’s okay. I’m sure it will be interesting for her to follow you guys,” Grayson said with a smile that felt a little plastered on.
“Are you certain, Grayson?” Eiji asked carefully. “It would be no bother to send her away.”
The respect in his voice was unmistakeable. Mairead frowned a little at it. Amana acted as if she couldn’t quite understand what was going on either.
“I know her,” Grayson said to the women to explain some of the weirdness in the room. “If it’s who I think it is. I hadn’t seen her for some time and we met up… here.”
“And you don’t like her?” Mairead blinked. “If that’s the case then we definitely don’t need her along, clogging up the works.”
“No, she’s nice. Really. It’s cool. Let her in,” Grayson said, not certain he was really ready for this.
I cannot continue to hide either.
Nero and Eiji looked up at him briefly before Nero went to the door and opened it. Sure enough, it was Rachel. He put on his own mask as she walked in. He knew he was holding himself too still and his very stillness was causing Eiji and Nero distress.
“That skirt is so not practical for cat burglaring,” Mairead remarked, nodding towards Rachel’s taupe pencil skirt and her ubiquitous notebook and pen clutched in front of her blouse. “You did pair it with some sneakers so I guess you’re not totally insane.”
But Rachel just smiled. “Grayson can assure you that I’ve never let fashion get in the way of anything!
Besides, I’m to observe, not actually help you with the task at hand though…
” Here she brightened, “it does sound like a lot of fun! My name’s Rachel.
Rachel Willis. I don't know if Grayson told you about me.”
“Not much,” Amana said quietly.
“Well, I promise I’m here to report fairly and be part of the fun,” Rachel assured them all.
“Speaking of fun, guys, we should be headed over to the fountain,” Grayson said, checking his watch. “That’s our starting point.”
That had Mairead squawking. She grabbed her coat and was tossing coats at the others as well.
She grabbed Amana’s arm and was dragging the other woman out of the door.
Eiji and Nero continued after them at a more sedate pace.
Nero looked back at him, but Grayson made a slight shake of his head to indicate they should go on without him.
That left just him and Rachel alone together.
“Shall we?” He asked, gesturing towards the door.
She nodded and they both left the room together. They didn’t speak until they were in the street.
“Grayson?” she said his name tentatively. “I wanted to apologize–”
“It’s all right, Rachel. You didn’t know how what you said would affect me,” Grayson interrupted her.
She grasped his hand, turning him towards her, and said, “But I should have! That night–and all the nights after it–were horrible for you. You ran away. You underwent who knows what on the streets and–”
“Nothing I want to remember,” Grayson grimaced. He felt his chest tightening again. “And nothing you could imagine.”
That was true.
“I was just so intent on letting you know your mother’s feelings that I failed to consider your own,” she said and shook her head. “I’ve thought about it day after day, but I couldn’t see you. They didn’t want me to see you until I begged Lord Balthazar–”
“Balthazar,” Grayson groaned and tipped his head back.
Don’t be too angry at me, Grayson! Balthazar’s voice flickered in his mind.
I notice that you’re asking me not to be angry with you when you’re not in front of me, Grayson growled. Not to mention Ryder’s nowhere near.
There was a pregnant silence from the Eyros Vampire. Finally, Balthazar said, You wanted to see her. I arranged it.
I didn’t even know I wanted to see her! So unless you’re taking on Seeyr’s gift–
Were you not thinking as you went into the dorms that you ought to face this? Balthazar wheedled.
I… yes, but you had to arrange this Rachel before I thought that, Grayson pointed out.
Another pregnant silence. Grayson almost would have laughed if it wouldn’t have completely unnerved Rachel.
That’s only because I knew you would think it eventually! He could almost imagine Balthazar giving him his most winsome smile as he pleaded this.
You’re really something, Balthazar! Grayson shook his head. You’re lucky I love you.
I am very lovable, Balthazar agreed happily.
Any other surprises I should expect tonight? Grayson asked.
No, no, nothing I can think of… at the moment, Balthazar added.
I don’t want to know, Grayson sighed.
“Grayson? Are you–are you okay?” Rachel asked as he had been silent too long.
“Ah, yeah, I was just… nevermind.” Grayson waved a hand. He smiled at her. “Look, I was shocked and… and I thought I could just leave the past behind. There’s so much I want to forget.”
Grayson put a hand to his head. Even talking about this was causing pressure to build in his head again. It was as if he were trying to physically push out the memories even as he recognized that he had to accept them.
“I thought it would make you happy on some level,” she said. “Did it?”
“I don’t know. I think it made me regret…” Here he paused before adding, “Leaving behind the past is easy when there’s nothing good in it.”
“Your mother is good, Grayson.” She squeezed his hands in her smaller ones. “She’s worth remembering. She’s worth taking into the future.”
Grayson gritted his teeth. “I don’t know if I want to take her with me.”
She swallowed as her eyes flickered over his face. “She’s not the only one, Grayson. I don’t know what happened after you left us, but–”
“I forced myself not to think about you, Rachel. Not you. Not her,” he found himself saying without conscious thought. “You were my best friend, but I kept picturing the look on my mother’s face on yours when you knew what I’d done.”
It was so hard now for him to remember Grayson’s memories.
But they wanted to break through. He heard childish laughter from long ago.
There was sunlight. So much sunlight. And Rachel was on the swing next to him.
Her hair was in pigtails. There was a chocolate stain on her yellow shirt–her favorite shirt–and they were making up a story together.
They were two adventurers heading on a quest for treasure!
They were a lord and lady fighting pirates on the high seas!
They were spies heading into enemy territory to save the world!
She would have loved to find out about me having powers. She would have loved knowing I am Ashyr. His eyes flickered up to her. And I could tell her. She could know. She could be happy with me. Make me see the joy in it too in another way.
“I would never have turned you away.” She held onto his hands tighter still. “However you killed that bastard, I was glad. You protected yourself and your mom. I don’t know how you did it. But I’m glad! I’ve always been glad!”
He shaded his eyes with one hand. Tears threatened to run down his cheeks. A cry that seemed lodged in his throat was loosening, wanting to come out. It was a cry he’d been holding in for far too long.
“I don’t know if I can do this,” he whispered. “There’s so much going on now. To bring up the past–this past–is not… not wise.”
“You don’t have to, Grayson. If you want to just go forward and never talk about it, that’s fine,” she said. “But… but I want you to know that I can help you carry whatever weight you have now. I can help you. I want to help you.”
He nodded. Words were too hard right now. He wasn’t sure how long they stood there. Her holding one of his hands and him just staring into space.
Unsurprisingly, it was Mairead who called back to them, “Guys, the game is starting right now.”
“We’ll be right there!” Grayson called, his voice a little hoarse. He turned back to Rachel. “I want… want you and Mom… in my life. I just don’t know how to do it yet.”
“I’ll help you figure it out, Grayson,” she promised, beaming up at him. “You’re not alone. I’m right here.”