5. Path Chosen #2
“He will not, Balthazar. He loves you as much as he loves Fiona. He would use that ax on himself before he would turn it on you,” Caemorn said.
“But I am supposed to take care of all of them!” Balthazar–the one whose mind Elgar was somehow in–cried.
“You are not. We do this together. All of us as Immortals work together. Responsible for each other. But we are each strong and capable. But as to my memories…” Caemorn’s forehead furrowed. “I remember… I remember touching Grayson’s soul.”
“WHAT?!” Balthazar’s voice went into an upper octave, likely more the domain of dogs. “How can that be good?”
“Because I remember sending him back to his body.” Caemorn’s forehead furrowed as he concentrated intensely. “Yes, he was in… Lasting.”
“Grayson in Lasting? You think they’re in Lasting now? We should go there–”
“No, not now. When I was dead. During the War,” Caemorn answered.
Balthazar let out a sound that was a mixture of a gasp and a cry. “Oh, could that be? Are you saying that they went back in time? What Bloodline has the ability to time travel? Oh…”
“What, Balthazar?” Caemorn’s eyes went sharp with inquisitiveness.
“I… I think… I don’t know. I just remembered for a second talking to Fiona about it.
Telling her I was jealous that her gift was so powerful and then…
then someone told me that I had the Kaly and Eyros gift in the future,” Balthazar said with a tone of wonder.
“Oh, dear gods, they did go back in the past! They’re in Destiny and I’m being a prat! ”
“Ah, I do not understand–”
“Caemorn!” It was Balthazar’s turn to grab the other man. “Caemorn, they’re in Destiny with me and I don’t want to die, but more importantly… more importantly… Elgar.”
Caemorn’s silver eyes were blank at first, but then filled with understanding. “Ah.”
“Yes. Ah. My fate was to die. Pretty gruesomely. But I knew I’d be coming back.
Elgar would come back too, but only after staying in the goddamned dirt the entire time.
With worms eating us both. Starving. Going mad.
Losing himself.” Balthazar’s voice was filled with grief and self-loathing.
He ripped at his clothing as if it were his flesh.
“He’s the way he is now because of me. And while you may be right that as Immortals we take care of each other and ourselves, my sole duty was to take care of him.
Elgar is my Childe. I don’t know how I could ever let that happen to him. But I do.”
“Because you had no choice,” Caemorn said. “In the end, there will be no choice for you. Because if there were, you would make a different decision. But since you did not then it means that you could not.”
Caemorn drew Balthazar into an embrace. Elgar could feel how tight it was. How warm. How loving. How safe Balthazar felt. And he did not feel alone. Not anymore. Not like he did now…
He did now…
Balthazar was Eyros reborn.
Elgar remembered Mirryr’s question to him, Elgar, if you knew that Eyros would be happier than he could ever be if he went through this thing, what would you give?
Anything.
Everything.
“Elgar!” Balthazar’s voice was filled with such love and sadness mixed.
“Yes, Master, I am here,” Elgar tried to say, but while it was his voice–slightly more diffident and stilted, but still his–it didn’t come from him. It came from within the room Caemorn and Balthazar were in.
“Dear boy, what have you got on your chest there?” Balthazar laughed, even as he wiped tears away from his face quickly, likely so that Elgar did not see them. “What on earth–”
“It is the beginning of a special tattoo. It is your skull, Master, within the Eyros symbol and surrounded by roses. A combination of Kaly and Eyros,” the Elgar in the room answered.
Elgar recognized himself though he was thinner than he should be.
Lanky more than muscular. And he could see that as his future self, he supposed that was, had no shirt on, but only a pair of very baggy trousers, no socks or shoes either.
His long black hair hung over his shoulders.
It was glossy with health and there was a tint of pink in his cheeks.
His silver eyes were bright too. He was clearly proud of the tattoo that his fingers followed the outline of.
“Demos is the artist. He does all of Ryder’s tattoos. Is it not beautiful? It will be more so when it is complete,” Elgar said with more of that evident pride.
Balthazar went closer to him and reached over to touch the tattoo. “It is lovely. Demos is a skilled artist indeed. If the, ah, skull is now inked on your chest, will you still need the real one to carry?”
“Not all the time. Only on special occasions,” Elgar told him a little uncertainly.
“Ah, well, that’s good. Very good. It’s in the skull box that Caemorn gave you?” Balthazar asked.
Elgar nodded. “Oh, yes, it is the most beautiful box.” His fingers twitched a little as if he wished he had the box–or maybe the skull–in them. “But having the tattoo of your skull on my body will ensure that you are always with me.”
There was a sharp intake of breath from Balthazar. “I am, Elgar! I promise I won’t leave you again! I will never leave you again! I–”
“It’s all right, Master. Do not be upset.” Elgar reached for Balthazar and tentatively grasped his shoulders as if he were not quite sure of touching anyone. “That’s what I came to tell you. That’s why I had to leave Demos and the needle. Because I knew that it was time.”
“Time? I don’t understand,” Balthazar confessed.
“Time that I told you that everything is going to be all right,” Elgar explained quietly. “That I chose this. That it was my choice. Not yours. Because I knew where it would lead. I knew what the future would be, too.”
“You knew… Elgar, what…” Balthazar was evidently speechless.
It was Caemorn who said, “Grayson, Ryder, Charlie and Fiona came to Destiny, didn’t they?”
“Yes.” Elgar nodded. “Grayson had just been turned. Fiona’s powers were affected by one of the structures so they could not teleport. Master, you let them into Destiny. To save them. But that was not their end destination.”
“It’s Solace, isn’t it? They need to go to Solace?” Balthazar sighed. “Of course, I won’t help them with that! No, I want to stay hiding in Destiny as if that’s a solution!”
But Elgar was shaking his head. “No, Master. Well, yes, at first. You were afraid of death. You do not know it like you do now with your Kaly gift and Caemorn at your side that it is not even an end let alone the end. That is what Charlie said to me. He is right. But you realized that if you died then I would go into the earth with you and many other Eyros Vampires would suffer.”
“Yes,” Balthazar whispered. “Gods, yes. And it’s all my fault.”
“There are many at fault and none. In the end, there was only one path before you that would lead here and I wanted to walk that path,” Elgar said, his voice becoming stronger and more like Elgar’s own with every word.
He even stood up straighter, no longer hunched over.
His expression was like clear water: nothing to hide.
He was smiling. “I chose this life. I chose this path. I do not regret any of it.”
“But you were suffering for so long! I don’t even know how you hid this from me!” Balthazar cried.
“Master is very cognizant of privacy since turning Christian,” Elgar remarked with a quirked smile.
“More so than he used to be. But you did not know, because I did not know. My mind…” Here Elgar struggled to find the right words, “I thought my hopes of waking up to a world where you were alive again were just dreams. Over the millennia, I came to believe that the future was not real, but just a wisp. A figment of my imagination. But then… then you came to Solace and I heard you. I rose up, but I was just wisps myself.”
“Oh, Elgar.” Balthazar pulled his future self into his arms. “Oh, gods, my Elgar! You’re not wisps now! You aren’t! I won’t let you just be wisps!”
“I am not, Master,” Elgar said, the smile evident in his voice. “I am becoming me once more. But even if I would stay wisps, a shadow of myself, I would still choose this path. For on this path, you are happy, Master. You are happy.”
The world swirled and Elgar was back on top of the cliff in Destiny. Eyros was holding onto him. He had collapsed on the ground. The storm was lashing them. Rain pelted his head and lightning tore apart the sky. Eyros was gripping him as if he was afraid that Elgar would disappear from his arms.
“Elgar, what happened?” Eyros gasped. “I couldn’t reach your mind! I–”
“I reached yours.” Elgar put a hand against Eryos’ left cheek. “Master, there is only one path forward.”
“What? No, Elgar, I will find a way to make that future not happen! I will make it–”
“No, Master. It is the right path,” Elgar interrupted him firmly. “It is the path we will walk together.”