16. Brooks
16
brOOKS
“What the hell did you make in here?” Cormac asked, surveying the pots on the kitchen counter as he entered the kitchen. He set his keys on the counter and a bag of leftovers from his time in town into the fridge.
Brooks lifted a couple of colorful Ziploc bags beside him on the kitchen table. “Play dough.” He wrinkled his nose at the mess. He’d told the chef not to worry about coming back to make dinner tonight, which meant he’d have to clean it all, too.
“You know they sell that at the store pre-made, right? Comes in handy yellow plastic tubs, too.”
Seated beside Brooks, Audrey was scribbling into a coloring book. Thank goodness Maddie had picked up a ton of supplies for him at the store the day before. He had forgotten how much it took to keep a four-year-old entertained. “Yeah, I know.” Brooks shrugged and stood, heading toward the collection of pots.
“I used to do this with Kayla. My mom had a recipe, and it was cheaper than the store-bought one. Lasted longer, too. Plus, making it is a whole activity.” He carried some pots over to the sink. “Audrey had fun, didn’t you?”
“Wanna see the worm family I made, Cormac?” Audrey asked Cormac.
“Of course I do,” Cormac said with exaggerated enthusiasm.
“Yeah, we made all sorts of worms,” Brooks said, giving him a grateful smile. He turned the faucet on and started washing one pot.
He really hadn’t intended to make a mess, but there had been little time to clean. Originally, he’d hoped he could snag a few minutes to pick up once Maddie arrived.
But she was already forty-five minutes late.
He snuck a glance at his phone.
She hadn’t texted him back, either.
Focusing on the task in front of him, Brooks tried not to overthink it. So she was late? She ran a business, after all, and he’d demanded a lot of her time this week.
No reason to let this get to him.
Putting the pot in the dishwasher, he paused in front of the drink fridge on the way to get another pot. His eyes landed on a pack of nonalcoholic Blue Moons Cormac had picked up on Sunday, but then he reached farther in and pulled out a regular one instead. Wordlessly, he uncapped it and took a swig.
Just something to take the edge off.
A beer later, he finished the dishes, feeling remarkably better. More in control.
It didn’t matter that Maddie was now over an hour late and hadn’t texted.
“Uncle Books, I’m hungry,” Audrey said, coming into the kitchen as he dried his hands.
“You want a grilled cheese?” Brooks asked. This he remembered. Little kids always seemed ready for the next meal just as soon as the kitchen was clean. Though, technically, the play dough hadn’t been a meal.
Audrey nodded. “Can I have chippies too?”
“Only if you eat the blueberries I bought, deal?”
“What happened to the chef tonight?” Cormac asked. Audrey had abandoned him to the coloring book and he was taking his time coloring a picture of Donald Duck.
“I told him not to worry about it.” Brooks wouldn’t mention that he’d enjoyed making dinner for Audrey with Maddie the day before. That maybe a part of him had been hoping for a repeat.
Where in the hell is she?
“Why?” Brooks asked Cormac. “You want a grilled cheese, too?”
“Unlike you, Mr. Private Chef, I will never turn down an American classic like grilled cheese,” Cormac said.
“My trainer will kill me if I eat that crap,” Brooks said with an eye roll. His diet had suffered enough while on tour, but he’d tried to stick to the plan the trainer had outlined as much as possible.
“What your trainer doesn’t know won’t hurt him.” Cormac shot Audrey a glance. “Are you done coloring, Miss Lady? I see a Daisy Duck that wants to be finished.”
Audrey scampered toward him, happy for the company in coloring.
Cormac had a point. The trainer didn’t have to know. But working out and maintaining his diet were a part of the job he didn’t mind so much. Lifting weights had become an outlet for him, even when he was out on the road. A way to keep that pretty mask on an otherwise effed-up interior.
Maybe that was what was going on with Maddie. He’d let her see under the mask too much.
One look at the dark, turbulent part of him and she’d run away scared. Hadn’t liked what she’d seen.
Tension squeezed his chest, and quietly, he grabbed another beer while getting cheese to make dinner.
The two bottles were easy enough to shove into the recycling bin as he cleaned up while Cormac and Audrey ate.
And like with the first beer, he felt remarkably calmer after the second one.
Who cares if it’s now almost two hours and Maddie hasn’t shown up?
He fired off a text, though.
Brooks: Guess that whole “whenever I want” part of the deal wasn’t clear to you.
His eyes narrowed as the message status went to Read.
Still no reply.
What the hell, Maddie?
Audrey came up to him, holding a piece of paper with scribbles on it. “Ahplane wide! Hit this button.” She pointed at one squiggle.
Brooks tore his focus from the phone and gave her a half-hearted smile. “What does the button do?”
“Pweess it.”
He pushed the squiggle, and she grabbed his hand, then dragged him over to the couch. She repeated the same process with Cormac, then climbed onto the coffee table in front of them. She sat with her back to them, holding the paper like a steering wheel. “Hew we go! Hold on!”
Brooks struggled to concentrate as Audrey continued chatting happily, instead pulling out his phone to check the text messages.
“Oh no, did you hear, Uncle Brooks? We’re going to crash into a tunnel.” Cormac shoved him.
Brooks snapped his attention back to the game, catching on. “Oh.” He covered his head. “Oh no!”
“Don’t wowy. We go ova it.” Audrey tossed him back a grin.
Focus, Brooks. He couldn’t be wasting his time wondering if a woman was going to text him back like a teenager.
Throwing himself fully into the game, Brooks played airplane enthusiastically with Audrey for the next twenty minutes, then scooped her into his arms. “All right, kiddo. I think Cormac has earned a break. Let’s go get ready for bed, shall we?”
Thank goodness four-year-olds had early bedtimes.
And that he had a friend as patient with his niece as Cormac had been. He really was the closest thing he had to a brother.
By the time Audrey was asleep and Brooks emerged from the bedroom, the slight buzz from the earlier beers had worn off, though, leaving agitation and anxiety in its place.
He found Cormac in the game room, racking the pool balls into the triangle.
“Thanks for your help tonight,” Brooks said.
“No problem. You expecting company tonight?” Cormac asked with a smirk as he lined up a shot on the pool table.
“No. Why?” Brooks tried to appear as casual as possible as he answered.
“You’ve looked at the clock about fifty times.” Cormac gave him a knowing look.
Had he?
Probably.
Then again, it was well past seven, and it was clear: Maddie wasn’t coming today.
Maybe something had come up.
But she hadn’t answered his texts, either.
Or maybe she just sees you like a weak little pussy who almost broke down last night.
He should have known from the way she’d hightailed it out of here so quickly that he’d freaked her out.
He didn’t know why he’d opened his mouth. He’d replayed the scene a thousand times and thought of a thousand different ways he could have handled that situation other than telling Maddie about his dad’s suicide.
That she hadn’t come by or texted was the only confirmation he needed that she probably looked at him like some sort of train wreck she didn’t want to be around.
Fuck it. He didn’t want to let it bother him. After this weekend, she’d be out of his life other than when he returned for that concert in a few weeks.
It’s better that way.
But he’d never told anyone about his dad. He’d been too afraid to. Something about Maddie, though, had brought down that wall though.
Stupid, stupid, Brooks.
You knew who she was when she tried to blackmail you.
Even though she’d said all the right things last night, her actions today spoke volumes.
Volumes that made him feel sick to his stomach.
He’d just given her more ammunition. More dirt to use against him.
You’re such a moron.
Her failure to appear meant he’d missed going to the mechanic again, too. He needed his car back. Much as he’d enjoyed spending time with Audrey, he couldn’t help feeling relief at the fact that Kayla would be back in a few days. He was quickly running out of ways to keep Audrey occupied.
“You sure Maddie wasn’t planning on coming over?” Cormac asked more pointedly, bringing him back to their conversation. “Audrey said she stayed for dinner yesterday.”
Leave it to the four-year-old to rat him out.
He just needed to take the edge off again.
Relax, already.
Brooks shrugged, then made his way over to the liquor cabinet near the bar. The rental included all the liquor, of which there was a fantastic selection. “Want a drink?”
Cormac straightened with a frown. “You’re not drinking.”
“Why not?” Brooks gave a taut smile. “I’m fine. I don’t have a real problem. Darren thought ‘sobriety’ would help my image. Lot of fucking good that did.”
Cormac narrowed his eyes. “Is this about Maddie?”
The bottle of bourbon scratched against the marble bar top as Brooks slid it closer. “Maddie who?” He threw a sarcastic smile back.
Cormac set his pool cue on the table, then came closer. “You don’t really want a drink. We’re in our thirties now, man. Alcohol doesn’t go down as smooth as it did when we were younger.”
Brooks raised a brow, then poured the amber liquid into a glass. He set the glass to his lips, the potent scent filling his nostrils. Then he tossed back a mouthful, a warm feeling curling against his tongue as the alcohol evaporated in his mouth. He swallowed and topped off the glass again.
“I don’t think you should drink, Brooks. Stupid idea of Darren’s or not, you’re a better man these days for not drinking.” Cormac gave him a hard look. “I don’t know what’s going on with you and Maddie, but don’t do this because of a woman. You’ve worked too hard.”
“Don’t be absurd. I’ve known her for a few days. Not to mention that she’s a liar and a manipulator.”
Cormac flinched. “I knew you were acting funny. What the hell happened?”
“Nothing happened.”
Cormac’s lips pursed, a spark of interest in his eyes. “Wow. You really like her, huh?” He spread his palm on Brooks’s chest as he lifted the glass again. “But I’m serious. Don’t do it, Brooks. Just throw it away. I like Maddie. But like you said, a woman you barely know isn’t worth it.”
Holding Cormac’s gaze, Brooks tipped the glass to his lips and swallowed. “I don’t need a reason for a drink.”
“As your friend, I can’t sit back and let you do this.” Cormac snatched the glass and walked it over to the sink, then dumped it down the drain.
The heady feeling from those first sips burned through Brooks’s veins. He clenched his jaw, his mind buzzing with anger.
Don’t do it.
Listen to Cormac.
He’s right.
“You got somewhere else to sleep tonight?” Brooks asked flatly.
Cormac jerked his head up. “You serious?”
“Get going.”
“What about Audrey?” Cormac crossed his arms. “If you won’t stop for your own sake, then stop for her.”
“Leave, Cormac.”
God, I hate the sound of my own fucking voice. The same voice that got me in trouble last night when I just didn’t know how to shut up with Maddie. Just like I should shut up now.
“I’m not leaving you and Audrey?—”
“Out. Now.”
Cormac’s expression darkened. He pushed past Brooks, then left the game room. A minute later, the front door slammed shut.
Dammit, Brooks.
He should call Cormac back. Apologize.
Cormac had been a good friend for years— one of the only people I truly trusted.
But when had trusting people gotten him anywhere?
Maddie’s face flashed through his mind.
“Fuck it.” Brooks grabbed the bottle of bourbon from the counter, then headed outside.