Chapter 14
14
HOPE
I press my hand to my stomach, feeling fuller than full. The salty breeze coming straight from the ocean is cool, sending goosebumps scattering across my flesh, and I shiver.
Ben notices and stacks our dishes in the middle of the table, then stands. “We should head out. You’re cold.” Like the obedient dog he is, Rex immediately makes his way to Ben’s side.
I watch as disappointment washes over Evan and wave off Ben’s concern. “I’m okay.” I stand and position the strap of my purse across my body. I’m sure he wants to be on his way. “Evan, do you want to walk along the beach before we go home?” It’s such a gorgeous afternoon, and if I can keep Ev busy here for a little while longer, it leaves less time for him to spend cooped up in his room.
He looks out at the waves and along the shoreline, taking notice of younger kids making sandcastles under the watchful gaze of their parents, while bigger kids toss a ball with their dads. His brows furrow, and he shrugs. “If you want to.” His voice lacks enthusiasm, and I know he’s only doing it for me.
Great, it seems he’s only enthusiastic about things when it involves Rex and Ben. “Evan, what do you say to Ben?”
He raises his head to Ben. “Thanks for today. And for lunch. I’m sorry I forgot my manners.”
Ben chuckles and raises his hand to Ev’s head, messing up his hair. “You’re welcome.”
My heart skips as I watch their easy companionship. Shane’s been awesome with Evan, stepping in as much as he could when Wyatt died. He’s been determined to keep his promise, but we couldn’t keep relying on him. We were holding him back, and I couldn’t live with the guilt. Thankfully, since I asked him to give us space, he has, but Evan’s missed him terribly. Guilt has been my constant companion, but I needed to release Shane from his obligation to us. He needs to get on with his own life, not be weighed down by a promise he made more than a decade ago.
Watching Evan with Ben, as he soaks up his attention like a sponge, is heart-wrenching. At the same time, it makes me happy that he’s made a new friend. Maybe I should be wary that Ben’s so much older than him, but I think he’ll be a wonderful role model, and I know he’ll encourage Evan to make good choices.
“Thanks for lunch. Are you sure I can’t pay for some of it, at least?”
He waves off my offer. “Nah. It’s cool. But do you mind if Rex and I join you for a walk?”
I swallow my surprise. I thought he was in a hurry to get home, using my goosebumps as an excuse. “Sure. If you’d like.”
Evan cheers and then pats his thigh, running toward the beach. “C’mon, Rex. Let’s go, boy.” Rex follows him like he would follow my son anywhere. At least he’s excited to spend time outside now. That’s something, I guess.
I chuckle. “He loves Rex so much.” I glance up at Ben and then return my gaze to Evan and Rex. “He asked for a dog after we left the shelter last time. I wouldn’t be surprised if he doesn’t try to steal yours.”
Ben pushes his hair back from his strong forehead. “He’s welcome to spend as much time with Rex as he’d like.”
I remove my sandals, then head toward the water so I can wet my feet as we walk. Ben removes his shoes and socks as well, and we walk side by side in comfortable silence for a while. I don’t feel the need to fill the quietness that’s fallen between us, enjoying the gulls overhead, the laughter of the children, and the swooshing of the waves on the shore. Why I feel so at ease in Ben’s company so quickly is beyond me.
Now that we’re out in the sunshine, it’s considerably warmer. The breeze feels incredible as it kisses my skin, and the sun is warm without being scorching. It’s the perfect afternoon. I grin in appreciation.
“What’s that smile for?” Ben asks, and my smile drops.
A curly lock blows across my lips, and I use the moment to pause as I grip it between my fingers and tuck it behind my ear. I look up into his gray eyes surrounded by thick, dark lashes. “I was just appreciating the perfect afternoon. The sun’s shining and the breeze feels phenomenal.” My eyes sting, and my nose tingles when I realize I’ve enjoyed this outing—and not once have I thought about missing Wyatt. I tear my gaze from Ben’s, not wanting him to see my pain, and return them to the horizon, swallowing my grief the best I can. “We bought our house as close to the beach as we could afford because Wyatt loved to surf. When he was home, he’d wake early and hit the waves, then he’d come home to collect me and Evan and bring us down here for a couple of hours. We’ve sort of avoided it more than we should have. It’s been nice to be back here.”
I’m not sure what made me blurt all of that out, but I think I needed to bring Wyatt into the conversation—as a reminder. There’s something about Ben that has me opening up to him, and I’m not sure what that is, but I need to remember where my loyalty lies. Our hands brush occasionally as we walk, so I put more space between us. If he notices, he doesn’t say anything.
“Growing up in the country, I didn’t live close to the ocean, so I’m not an experienced swimmer, and I can’t imagine how hard it is to learn to surf. But I enjoy living as close as I do to the ocean now, so I can run or walk along the shore. I love watching the waves and tide roll in. I enjoy watching others enjoy the beauty of the water. The sunsets from my back porch are stunning, and I wouldn’t give them up for anything now that I’ve experienced them.”
Appreciation warms me to my center. I’m so grateful that he shared his experience with me instead of trying to soothe me with unnecessary platitudes.
Ben pauses and his eyes narrow as his body stiffens. When I follow his gaze, there’s a young man running away from the shore, carrying a pink backpack. The woman shouting after him is obviously torn between leaving her children and running after him. Ben drops his shoes and takes off, pointing toward the guy. “Rex! Go! Guard!” His voice is firm and unyielding.
Rex’s ears perk up, and in an instant, his fun-loving personality flips. He turns in the direction Ben points toward and takes off in a sprint—I don’t think I’ve ever seen a dog run so fast. Ben’s hot on his heels, and even though he’s fast, he can’t keep up with Rex.
Evan comes over to me. “What’s going on?”
I point toward the young guy who’s running away and then back toward the lady. “I think that man stole her backpack. Ben and Rex are chasing him down.”
His eyes widen. “Woah. That’s so cool!”
I nod in agreement. I guess when you’re a cop, you’re never off duty. I collect Ben’s shoes, and we wander closer to the lady as we watch everything unfold.
Rex catches up to the guy and leaps onto his back, knocking him down. The backpack goes flying out of his hand, and then Rex seems to be growling at the man, his fur spiking up and ears erect. His stance looks incredibly threatening, but he’s not attacking the guy—more like keeping him in place.
Quite a crowd has gathered to watch the spectacle as Ben catches up to them, holding his phone to his ear. He doesn’t seem to be in a rush to call Rex off the thief.
Rex maintains his stance, growling at the young guy while Ben talks on his phone. Then, he pockets the device and stands with his hands on his hips, assessing the situation. My heart pounds in a heavy rhythm against my ribs.
He didn’t hesitate to act. Not for a single second.
The woman who had her backpack stolen, brings her hands up to her chest. “Oh, my god. That man and his dog stopped the thief.”
I step a little closer. “He’s a police officer. Actually, they both are.”
She turns toward me, her wide eyes falling on me. “Seriously?”
I nod. “Yeah. That was incredible to watch. I’ve only ever seen the fun, playful side of Rex. He’s amazing.” If not a little terrifying.
When I look down at Evan, his mouth is gaping, and his eyes are wide like moons. “Rex was amazing, Mom. Did you see him?”
“I did.” It was a little frightening to watch. He’s so gentle and playful with Evan, but what if he turned on him suddenly? Should I be so trusting of him with my son?
A few minutes pass, and when a police car pulls up, Ben drags the young man to his feet. They talk for a few minutes, then an officer heads toward us with Ben and Rex, while the other stays with the thief.
Ben hands the backpack to the woman with a smile, his straight white teeth surrounded by his short, dark beard almost sparkling beneath the sun. “Your backpack, ma’am.”
“Oh, thank you so much,” she gushes, her cheeks flushing pink. “You’re my hero.” Her appreciation seems excessive, and the way she leans forward, showing her cleavage, is making me feel uncomfortable.
I narrow my eyes, unsure if I like the way she’s looking at Ben. Not that I have any right to feel any kind of way about anything to do with him. He’s not mine.
Objectively, I know he’s a handsome man. He has an impressive body, beautiful eyes, and amazing hair—among other great qualities you only learn about as you get to know him. His easy smile is definitely swoonworthy. I can see why she’s looking at him like a piece of meat, and I wonder if that happens to him a lot.
Even though he’s off duty, he remains professional. I don’t understand this feeling that’s erupted through my body. All I know is it makes me uneasy and I feel out of my element.
A hand touches my arm, and I jump, my heart leaping into my throat. “Are you all right?” Ben asks.
I was so lost in my thoughts that I hadn’t noticed he’d finished with the woman. I look up into his worried gaze. “Yeah, it took me a moment to work out what was going on when you took off.” I hand him his discarded shoes.
“Rex was incredible!” Evan shouts as he drops to his knees, wrapping his arms around Rex’s neck and burying his face in his fur.
Now that I’ve seen Rex in action, I’m not as comfortable with Evan being so familiar with the dog. “Evan, I don’t think it’s a good idea for you to play with Rex like that. He’s a working dog.” My heart pounds, and the rush of blood through my body is almost louder than the waves. I’m not sure why I didn’t think about it before. I guess seeing him in action made the reality of what Rex does hit home. Evan doesn’t release his hold and my breathing picks up speed. “Evan. Let Rex go, please, and step away.”
Creases form between Ben’s eyebrows as he watches me. “Are you okay?”
I wave my arm toward his dog. “I’m just concerned. What if he attacks Evan?”
Ben shakes his head and places his hands on his hips. “He would never. He didn’t attack that guy because I never gave him the instruction to do that. Hope, his training is impeccable. You have nothing to fear. Evan is completely safe. I give you my word.”
Instead of being offended, he offers me a genuine promise that my son is safe. My shoulders relax, the worry releasing from my body, and exhaustion takes hold. I trust his word. I trust him .
“Rex only went after that guy because I gave him the command to. He would never take chase, attack, or guard without a command from me and me alone. Evan and you are both one hundred percent safe in his company. As is everyone who comes into contact with him, unless they’re a criminal,” he tells me with his stormy eyes locked on mine, putting me further at ease.
“Thank you. I hope I didn’t offend you. It’s just … Evan’s all I have left and?—”
He holds up his hand, shaking his head slightly. “You don’t need to say any more, Hope. I get it. It can be confronting when you see Rex in action for the first time, and I completely understand where you’re coming from.” He digs a rope out of his pocket and holds it out to Rex, who obediently sits at his feet, looking at the toy with longing. “Play.”
Without pause, Rex latches onto the rope and begins a game of tug-of-war with Ben. Playful Rex is back. The muscles beneath Ben’s tattoos tense and shift with the game, and as I watch them play, a small smile tugs at my lips. I can’t believe he’s the same dog who just went after a thief.
Rex shakes his head side to side and digs his back feet into the sand, but Ben’s not giving him an inch.
“Good boy, Rex,” he encourages, and Rex responds with a playful growl.
“Can I do that too?” Evan asks.
My pulse leaps, and Ben looks to me for guidance. I know I should nod or say something to give him the okay, but I can’t find it in myself right now to agree to the game. I trust Ben, but what if Rex is still hyped up from the chase and he bites Evan by mistake?
Ben must read the indecision in my eyes. “Maybe another time, Ev. Give your mom some time to get used to the idea. Okay?”
Evan’s bottom lip drops into a pout. “I guess.” I know he’s not happy, but Ben’s right. I need some time to get my head around it.
“We should probably head home, Ev.” His shoulders drop, but he doesn’t argue. Thank goodness for small mercies.
Ben pushes his hair away from his forehead again. “I’ll walk with you to your car.”
We make it to the parking lot, and I put my sandals back on while Ben puts on his shoes and socks, pushing his hair back again as he stands.
“Would you like to follow us home? I can cut your hair. I have everything I need, and it would save you from coming into the salon,” I offer. Shock has my mouth slamming shut and my eyes widening.
His eyes widen slightly, along with his lips, like he’s as surprised as I am by my offer. “Only if it’s no trouble. I don’t want to put you out.”
“It’s no trouble at all, and it’s the least I can do since you’ve bought us lunch twice now.”
“You don’t owe me anything for that. I was happy to have company.” He’s mentioned company a few times now. He hooks his thumbs through the loops of his jeans while I shift on my feet and wonder if he’s a little lonely like I am. “Are you happy for me to bring Rex, or should I drop him home first?”
“Mom, say Rex can come too. Please.”
Now I feel terrible because Ben thinks I don’t trust Rex. “Please bring Rex with you. I can’t bear the thought of him being left at home alone.”
“If you’re sure.” I nod. “All right, I’ll follow you home then.”