Chapter 37
Wanna Go For a Spin?
Idug my hand into my pocket to feel for my treasures, filled with an immediate sense of relief as my fingertips brushed Daire’s sea glass before closing around Hunter’s key.
Losing the carousel was breaking my heart. I’d taken to carrying Hunter’s key around with me. Even if I didn’t make it over to Carousel park, just knowing I could if I wanted to was a great comfort.
Once it was gone, I didn’t know how I could ever go back.
I left Daire at home, looking as sexy as ever, surrounded by construction paper, scissors, and ornament templates, as well as the green construction paper trees I helped him cut out for his class the night before.
The beach was cold, but I needed to clear the fog from my head and there was no better place for me than here.
For once my eyes were trained on the horizon rather than the shore, and I marveled at the difference in my outlook over the past several days.
The facts as I once knew them had not changed. I was still petite, curvy, sassy, bossy, and softly rounded.
The fact remained that I dipped out of an errand that ended in my brother’s death.
I could not change the facts, but I could see them through a different lens.
I was worthy of love.
Despite my failings.
And my mistakes.
I closed my eyes, my brow furrowing momentarily at the sharp stab of pain I suspected would stay with me as long as I continued to breathe.
But that did not change the fact I was no less worthy than anybody else.
Hunter taught me that.
Perhaps I would have to borrow Hunter’s lens until I managed to discard the one distorted by my wounds. Because my greatest weakness lay in my lack of faith in myself.
It’s amazing how the human mind seeks to validate its own beliefs. And I latched onto every scrap of evidence I could gather to support my belief in my inherent unloveliness.
I would give anything to have him back.
A tear slipped down my cheek, but unlike all the others I’d cried, this one was not heavy with guilt.
It was grief.
And love.
In all its bittersweet duality.
I took a deep breath and looked out over the crashing waves. Somewhere out there, Hunter’s wish lay nestled among the sand and rocks at the bottom of the lake.
And waited for me at home.
Somewhere out there, Hunter cheered me on as he always had.
Though he couldn’t tell me himself, I believed that with every piece of my once shattered heart.
A heart no longer made of glass, nor stone, but something much more malleable.
Something that beat harder when Daire walked into the room.
Something that squeezed tight at the deeper lines fanning out from the corners of my parents’ eyes.
Something that thudded with anticipation, fluttered with happiness, skipped with joy.
Wept with grief.
Something ready to embrace love, and life, and wishes.
If Hunter had a choice, I would love my life, perhaps not as wildly as he did, but I would take the leap into the beautiful abyss that awaited me on the other side of forgiveness.
Every epic love story requires a leap of faith.
This would be mine.
Returning from the beach, Daire herded me into the shower where his plans to warm me up quickly evolved into something else entirely where his penchant for picking me up came in more than handy.
But also left us with little time to get ready and make our reservation at Ayana’s.
Ayana’s, a candlelit winter wonderland all year long, was the most romantic restaurant in Mistlevale.
“Are you ready?”
“Almost,” I replied. “Should we just stay home?”
“No,” he replied adamantly. “I’ve been wanting to take you on a proper date for months.”
“I’ll make it worth your while,” I teased.
“I have a present for you.”
“I’m ready,” I declared.
He chuckled. “I thought you might be.”
Walking hand-in-hand down the street in Mistlevale, the wind nipping at our faces, we perused the window displays Mistlevale was famous for. With Halloween over, they had fully morphed into their Christmas best.
“It’s beautiful,” I murmured, squeezing his fingers. “I love this place so much.” I eyed the gift bag swinging nonchalantly from Daire’s fingers. “Are you going to tease me with that all night?”
“No,” he shook his head. “Not at all. As soon as we order, I’ll give it to you.”
Walking to the coat check at the back, Ayana’s granddaughter Shae took our things.
“How’s Mistlevale treating you, Shae?” I asked with a smile.
Having grown up in Sage Ridge, a couple of years ahead of me in school, we knew each other well from being on the swim team.
With her height and perpetually swinging blond ponytail, one she wore even now, she fit the aesthetic and wasn’t forced to ride the bench. But it was only on the outside. Even then she had no time or patience for the Brady Bunch.
When her dad passed away from cancer, she moved up to Mistlevale to live with her grandmother until she went away to university, and we lost touch.
This was not the first time I’d run into her since she returned a couple of years ago and I reminded myself yet again to get together with her to catch up.
She looked like she could use a friend, and I’d always liked her.
“Good.” She smiled then jerked her chin up at Daire before returning her attention to me with a cheeky grin. “Not as good as Sage Ridge is treating you, I suspect.”
Daire smiled easily and accepted our coat tags. “I do my best.”
She nodded and winked at me. “See that you do.”
I pulled out my cell phone and handed it to her. “Here, give me your number. We keep saying we’re going to catch up, but we never do.”
Her face lit up. “I’d love that.” She typed in her information and sent herself a quick text. “There. I’ve got you now, too.”
“Enjoy your meal,” she said, then whispered my name harshly as soon as Daire turned the corner into the restaurant.
I swung back around to find her leaning out of the coat check. With big eyes and an even bigger smile, she gave me two thumbs up.
I laughed out loud.
I would definitely be calling her.
For the first time in more years than I could remember, I ordered what I wanted to eat rather than what I thought I should.
And for the first time in more years than I could remember, I looked forward to my meal with zero guilt.
Snapping the menu closed, I passed it to our server as Daire did the same before sliding the gift bag across the table.
I looked at him, a hint of trepidation in my gaze.
He smiled and shook his head. “It’s not an engagement ring. I know you’re not ready yet.”
I frowned, flooded with a mix of relief and disappointment.
He laughed. “Your feelings are all over your face. It’s coming, Harley. Sooner than you think, but not tonight.”
I nodded, my face warming.
He reached across the table and took my hand, his eyes steady and sincere. “It is coming, Harley. I’ve got it all planned. Trust me.”
I breathed in and could not manage to quell my wide smile.
“With any luck at all, that smile means you’re planning on saying yes, but for now, I wanted to give you this. Hopefully this will show you just how much your happiness means to me. How much you mean to me.” He rubbed his thumb over my wrist. “How much I love you.”
“I love you too, Daire,” I replied softly, disbelief at finding myself in this wonderful place with this beautiful man who painted me with every shade of happiness.
“Open it.”
Inside the bag was a five-inch square box wrapped in tissue paper. Tearing it away, I opened the lid and slid a delicately intricate carousel complete with miniature horses that moved up and down as I tipped the carousel back and forth.
It must have cost a small fortune.
“Oh,” I breathed, tears coming to my eyes. Never in my life had I felt more seen, heard, and understood. “You got me this so I’ll always have a carousel to remind me of my brother.”
“Not quite,” he replied, looking truly uncomfortable for the first time since I’d met him. “There’s something else in the bag.”
I peered inside and pulled out an envelope stamped with The Township of Sage Ridge. “What is this?”
He ran a hand through his hair, his mouth twisting to the side. “Open it and you’ll see.”
Sliding a trifold piece of paper out of the sleeve, I opened it to reveal a bill of some sort issued by The Township of Sage Ridge.
My eyes scanned the paper top to bottom rapidly, then again, and once more for good measure when I noted my name.
“Daire… Did you buy me the carousel?”
He winced. “Sort of. I paid for the repairs. And you now have rights to it. They can’t tear it down, paint it, or alter it in any way without your approval.”
“What?” I breathed, tears springing to my eyes. “How? Why?”
“The how was easy. I went to the town council. They wanted to keep it almost as badly as you did. I asked them how much they needed in exchange for you owning it and they agreed to the terms on that paper in exchange for repairs. Once they knew it was for you, they fell ass over teakettle to get it done.”
“As for the why, it’s simple. Your happiness means everything to me.” He swallowed, his eyes shining. “You mean everything to me.”
“I can’t believe this…”
“It’s a good can’t believe this, I hope?”
Without a single thought for propriety or consideration for whoever else was in the restaurant, I stood and rounded the table to Daire’s side.
He pushed back his chair just in time for me to slide onto his lap.
I tucked my face into his neck.
He locked his arms around my waist and nestled me against his chest.
His chest that vibrated with warmth and love. His chest that protected me from the hard facts of life. His chest that was the safest place I could ever be.
His chest that was wide enough and strong enough to hold all of me.
“I love you, Harley.”
“There are no words, Daire. No words for what you’ve done for me.”
“I’ve got a few,” he murmured. “Wanna go for a spin?”