CHAPTER TWENTY-TWO Mike
Eleven Years Ago
Around midnight, the sound of a car parking across the street pulled me from my bed.
I’d been lying in the dark since ten thirty, waiting for Cooper to get home.
He’d texted that since Jen and I were on a date that he was going to the drive-in with Mike Hastings.
Jen canceled because of a sore throat but I didn’t tell him that so he went to see The Avengers without me.
We’d talked about going together since we both loved action films, but he’d chosen to go with Hastings because I’d had plans.
I hid off to the side of my open window so I could watch them.
I didn’t like the thought of Cooper kissing Hastings but it was his right to be happy like I was with Jen.
Just moments after arriving, Cooper hopped out and Hastings roared off in his parents’ Honda Civic.
Cooper stood under the streetlamp watching the car disappear around the corner with his shoulders slumped in sadness.
I held my cell phone flashlight under my face and waved at him from my bedroom window.
He touched his chest and then pointed at me, asking permission to come over so I nodded and waited.
I heard Mom and him talking at the foot of the stairs.
She wasn’t surprised to see Coop in our house at odd hours of the night.
The way he trudged up the stairs told me that he wasn’t in good spirits.
“Hey, buddy,” I greeted after he closed the door behind him. “How was the movie?”
“Movie was okay. Company not so much,” he admitted.
Cooper kicked his sneakers off, and then pulled off his T-shirt and jeans before rolling over me to his spot closer to the wall.
We had our sleeping positions ever since he’d been spooked when we were eleven years old and he asked me to sleep closer to the door. Even then I’d been his protector.
I had a million questions about Hastings, but waited for him to spill the beans. We lay in silence until he rolled over to face me and rested his hand on my chest.
“I hate being gay,” he muttered, snuggling closer to me even though it was hot for April. “Guys are mean sometimes.”
His announcement got my shackles up because I was concerned that Hastings had hurt him. “Did Hastings lay a hand on you?” I asked. “I swear I’ll . . .”
Cooper slid his hand to my mouth and shushed me. “Calm down, Mikey. Hastings didn’t lay a hand on me. I’d be so lucky.”
“Then what?” I grilled, ready to defend my best friend. “Did he call you names?”
“I thought he liked me that way,” Cooper said. “You know what I mean, like he asked me to the drive-in and stuff. What straight guy goes to a drive-in with another boy?” he asked. “Well, other than you,” he added, laughing.
“He tell you he didn’t like you?” I asked. “Did you ask him if he did?”
“He said he liked me as a friend. He friendzoned me ten minutes into the movie.”
“That’s not so bad, right?” I asked. “He seems cool enough to have as a friend and shit.” I said the words but didn’t mean them.
I preferred they weren’t friends and had felt shitty ever since the admission had crossed my mind.
I didn’t have exclusive rights to Cooper’s friendship but still didn’t want him having such a stud as a friend.
I couldn’t explain my jealousy. What if he liked Cooper and took him away from me?
“It’s what he said after he friendzoned me,” Cooper said quietly. I waited for him to explain further but he didn’t continue.
“What happened, buddy?” I whispered. “No judgment.”
Cooper let out a long sigh. “He asked me to suck his dick. He said we could be friends and on the down low. He said he wouldn’t do stuff to me but I could suck him off and he wouldn’t tell anyone.”
“Jesus,” I muttered.
“And when I said no he grabbed my hand and pressed it against his crotch. ‘See what you do to me,’ he said.”
I gently squeezed Cooper’s hand that was on my chest. “Asshole,” I stated. “I’ll kick his ass for you.”
Cooper continued, “Then he said he thought all gays wanted to suck straight guys’ dicks and he was totally fine if I blew him a few times a week until he got a girlfriend. Maybe even after in case she didn’t suck dick,” Cooper explained. “He even asked if I was blowing you.”
I pushed Cooper’s hand from my chest and leaped out of bed. “What a fucking creep!” I raged. “Fucking asshole! I will fuck him up.”
“He didn’t actually like me as a boyfriend like I’d hoped he did,” Cooper said, biting his lower lip. “And I would have sucked his dick if he had.”
“The fuck you would’ve,” I raged further. “He doesn’t deserve you, Coop. What a fuckwad.” I sat on the edge of my bed facing away from Cooper. I was angry and sad that my best friend was hurting. “But he didn’t hurt you, right? Not physically or anything?” I asked, turning to face him.
Cooper slid a hand across the bed toward mine, forcing his fingers underneath mine. “No, he didn’t,” he answered. “But, Mikey, it just sucks that I’m good enough to suck his dick but not good enough to kiss and stuff.”
“Yes, you are,” I whispered. “I think you are anyway.”
“I wished I had a boyfriend like you, Mikey. A guy that makes me feel the way I feel when I’m around you,” he said. “I want to be safe and cared for by a guy that’s handsome like you.”
“You will, Coop.”
He pulled me back on the bed and played with my hair while my head rested on his bare stomach.
It was a typical gesture between us that I didn’t recognize was something I needed until he was holding me.
I listened, defended, and made it clear I was there for him, then he always showed me what I meant to him by comforting me back.
“I really liked him,” he admitted.
“I know you did, buddy. I’m sorry it didn’t go your way this time,” I said, even though my words were untrue.
I wished nothing but the best for Cooper, but secretly I was pleased that Mike Hastings wasn’t the guy for him. The thought of a guy like Hastings who was all muscular and good looking being with Coop didn’t sit well with me. I knew I was being unfair, but I wanted Cooper all to myself.
Perhaps I wasn’t a good friend.