6. Chapter Six
Chapter Six
Porter
I’m working on a custom Harley job for Ronnie when I hear his swearing coming from underneath the truck he’s working on.
I talked to Ed and he understands that my niece is the most important thing to me right now. Right before I left he had hired a few guys in addition to his son so he isn’t strapped with the shop by himself. I keep in touch with him weekly to keep him updated but as of now, I’m in Lupine Valley for the long haul.
I can’t let Kayla go back to living in squalor with Maura. Not after seeing the strides she’s making at school and with friends.
“God damn it! Porter, get your ass over here,” he yells.
I walk over to the next bay to see Ronnie’s legs sticking out. “What’s up man?”
“I’m stuck. Pull me out. I’m done with this shit. Fuck this shit. I want to be on a goddamn beach with my wife.” I pull him out but not before laughing at him .
“Thanks. Don’t you dare tell my ol’ lady about this. She’ll be all over me to go back to the doctor.” He says, shaking his hands.
“What do you mean back to the doctor ? This has happened before?” I ask, concerned for his health. I always loved Ronnie, he looked out for me when he didn’t have to. He took on a kid from the park with a shitty family. He has visited me in New York, but he never told me he was having health concerns.
“These old hands of mine. They keep going numb. Couldn’t slide myself back out. It’s nothing,” he waves me off dismissing his health concerns. “You got a minute to talk?” He asks.
“I do. Let me just go clean up a bit, then I’m going to get going after so I can be home for Kayla.” I walk over to my bay and clean up what I was working on before going up to Ronnie’s office.
“Hey, you ready for me?” I ask knocking on his door.
“Yea. Come in.” He gestures to the chairs in front of the desk, I move some papers around to clear a spot. “Listen, boy. I’m an old man. My ol’ lady, she wants to be on the beaches of Florida permanently. I have no kids, and this town can’t handle me closing down the shop. How long you plannin’ on stickin’ around here?”
“Well, I don’t know. Maura is still missing but I’m not letting her get Kayla back. Stacey and I are already working on permanent guardianship. But I don’t know if we’ll stay here or go back to New York.” I don’t mention that I don’t want to go back to New York for reasons I definitely won’t share.
“Well. I want to offer you a first shot to buy the shop. I don’t think I have anyone else who would want to buy it which means it’s going to be an outsider. You know these people. You know how I run the business. I want it to be you.”
I look at Ronnie shocked. “You want me to buy the business still?”
“Course I do, boy. You’re the closest thing I got to a son, and you’re a damn good mechanic. I trust you to carry on my name in a good way.” Ronnie doesn’t give compliments so this means more than he’ll ever know.
“I’d love to, Ronnie, but I don’t have that much saved, not after everything with Kayla. I don’t know that I’d be able to get a loan in this town with the rumors and all about my family.” I don’t want to get excited but, damn, this would be amazing.
“Agh, you know I don’t trust those bank folk. You and I work out a price and you pay me monthly. No loan nonsense. You want the shop or not?” He is straight to the point.
“Yeah Ronnie, I’d love to buy the shop. Kayla wouldn’t have to leave the only place she’s ever known for her senior year. When are you looking to be done?” He crosses his hands and folds them on the desk in front of him.
“Yesterday. I wanted to be done yesterday. Let’s talk in a couple days. Make sure this is what you want still. Sound good? ”
“Yeah. That sounds good.” I reach out my hand and shake his, when he surprises me and pulls me in for a hug.
Ronnie must be getting soft in his old age, I chuckle to myself.
For the first time in a long time, excitement and hope surge through me.
I just hope Ed is happy for me.
It’s been weeks since my confession to Addy. She’s softened toward me, more like her old self. Maybe we could even be considered friends. She’s there for Kayla, comes over for dinner, teaches us how to cook decent meals, and helps me when Kayla sends me to the store to buy tampons. I’m still confused by all the options, but Addy came to my rescue and helped me figure it out. She didn’t hold back her laughter though.
Which is how I find myself here at my old high school, helping Addy and her team build decorations for the spring fling dance. Again.
A dance that is the highlight for every high school student come April. Except Addy, because I could never afford a suit.
When Addy asked me to help volunteer I couldn’t turn her down. Not that I wanted to. Even though I’m fighting myself, and purposely not touching her, she continually finds small ways to touch me lately, testing the limits of my restraint daily and this might just be my breaking point. I can’t figure out if she’s doing it to me on purpose, but the more likely option is that she’s just a touchy feely woman. Always has been.
“Hey, Porter!” A hand slaps on my back. “Great to see you, man.”
I turn around to see an old classmate, Craig, who I’ve learned is the Chemistry teacher. I learned this because I don’t like how close he is to Addy, and I finally broke my rule about involving Kayla when I asked who he was. What really pushed me over the edge was last week when she was carrying a box in from her car to the school, he placed his hand on the small of her back instead of taking the box for her.
Kayla had laughed at me and told me that I had nothing to worry about. Adelaide always politely turns down his obvious flirting. Then she told me I was so cringe . Whatever that means in teenager terms today.
“Hey, Craig. How you been?” I return the greeting. Even though I just watched him stare at Addy’s ass for a solid five minutes instead of helping her nail in the flowers on top of the archway.
“Great, man. Great. Teaching Chemistry here.” Somehow I’ve managed to avoid him up until this point. I wish that luck had kept up. Now I’m stuck here making small talk.
Addy laughs at something one of the kids says and we both turn in her direction. “So, you and Adelaide starting your thing back up?” he asks. I now know he didn’t want to say hi. He wanted to size up his competition.
“Naw, man. We’re friends. She’s helping a lot with Kayla. I’ve never had a kid, nor do I know anything about teenage girls.” Addy looks over at us and waves. We both stare and wave back, clearly under the same spell. But I don’t like where this is going.
“Cool. Cool. I was thinking of asking her to Spring Fling with me.” He smiles, too big.
Ouch, a not so subtle dig that Addy and I never attended, despite her being on the decorating committee, with Craig, as a student. Instead of admitting I could never afford the suit, I acted like it wasn’t a big deal. Another reminder of the selfishness I had when it came to her.
“Isn’t that for the students?” I ask, biting my tongue to hold back a comment that isn’t so nice.
He laughs, an irritating sound that is quickly grating on my nerves. “Guess it is. But gestures and all, right man?”
I bite my tongue instead of pointing out that he could use a lesson in how to treat women with basic manners and instead nod at him.
At that he walks back over to the group of students with Addy. All the students love him, he has an easy rapport with them, and her. He is exactly who she deserves. A quiet, stable guy. A guy without a cloud of bad shit following them.
I go back to building the photo booth and try to distract myself from watching them together with the kids. He might be who she deserves, but I take quiet solace in the fact that I’m the one she finds ways to subtly touch, not him.
“This looks great, Porter!” Addy places her hand on my back announcing her arrival.
Another reminder of our time together. She used to come to the shop to see me while I worked, and I always told her to make sure she touched me so I knew she was there before she spoke. Coming from the neighborhood I did, it wasn’t always the safest option to scare a man with tools in his hands.
“Thanks, it was all your design though.” She chuckles, a light melodic sound that makes me smile back.
“A design that wouldn’t be a possibility without your carpentry abilities.”
“Who are you going to the Spring Fling with?” I ask her on impulse.
“Porter, you know I’m just chaperoning,” she says matter of factly.
“With Craig?” I ask, scowling.
“No, Porter. Not with Craig. He might want that, but I don’t. I only want one person. And you know it.” Damn it. She saw right through that question.
“You deserve a man like Craig. He could make you happy.” I cup her cheek.
“He could never, Porter. Not like you.” She leans into my touch.
“No, not like me, baby. The opposite of me is what you deserve. Someone to give you the life you want.” I start to walk away, unable to contain myself anymore. She pulls my hand back and places a chaste kiss on my cheek.
Before turning to leave she whispers, “It’ll always be you, Porter. It’s time you got on board with that. Because my answer won’t change. I’m tired of being subtle,” she winks at me and walks away leaving me speechless.
Goddamn it!
I’m not the man for her. Why won’t she see that too?
Walking out of the gym, I text Kayla to let her know I’m on my way home. I can’t watch Craig flirt with Addy anymore. I can’t see her with another man. It hurts too much. Even if it’s my own choice keeping her there.
When I get home, I check in with Kayla and head to the basement to work out. If I don’t work out some of this energy, I might do something stupid like sit outside, waiting for Addy so I can kiss her senseless, and be a selfish man, again.
I am just about to start work when my phone rings.
It’s the sheriff calling with updates on Maura. I dread these calls. As soon as Maura started getting into drugs with our parents, I knew the day would come when I needed to take care of her too.
“Hello, this is Porter Jackson.” I answer.
“Son, it’s Sheriff Miller, I’m callin’ to give you an update on your sister, or lack of one. We heard from one of her colleagues that she took off with her dealer to Jersey.”
“Are you even still looking for her? Are they going to look for her?” I ask with a bite to my voice.
“Of course we are, son. We have extra patrols going around all the usual haunts, but she ain’t here. At least not in Lupine Valley. No one has seen her since they say she left. But with no town I can’t go huntin’ the whole state of Jersey.”
I sigh. “Thanks Sheriff Miller. I appreciate you looking for her.”
“We might not have seen eye to eye back then. But I know you’re a good man now. You made something of yourself up there in New York. I check in with Ed every so often, he says you’re real successful with that restoration business of yours, and I’m proud of you for coming to take care of that niece of yours.”
“Wait, Ed? What do you mean you kept up with Ed? How did you know where I was?” I ask, completely shocked.
“You didn’t think a responsible adult would take in a lonely, scared kid without making an effort to find out why he’s runnin’, did ya?” he laughs. “I told him you were better off up there with him, gettin’ a good job you could be proud of.”
“I, but, what about the mill? They were looking for me. I ran because of that. I thought you hated me.” I’m still in shock.
“I don’t hate ya, boy. I felt bad for ya. Went to your Momma and Daddy plenty of times asking what they needed for you kids. They slammed the door in my face. When we got the call you were with those boys, I wanted them to bring you in. I finally had a good enough reason to hold ya. But I only wanted to talk to you about how I could help without you runnin’ the opposite direction. But then you ran for good and I was glad to hear it.”
“I don’t know what to say, Sheriff Miller.”
“Nothing to say, son. You take care of that girl, and I’ll let you know if we hear anything.” He hangs up, and I’m left staring at my phone.
After I hang up with the sheriff, I call Stacey to let her know what is going on with Maura.
“Thanks for updating me, Porter. The good news is we have a good case for you to get permanent guardianship, but it won’t be a quick process unless Maura is found and agrees to sign over rights. The past is not on our side with that happening.” She sighs.
“I know. Luckily, she doesn’t have the trailer to go back to, she has nowhere so I might be an asshole, but I’m kind of pushing her hand if she comes back. At this point, I can almost guarantee she’d take money to just leave.” I run my hand through my beard. I know I’m being an asshole, but I don’t care anymore. I had to stop caring when I realized that neither Maura or my parents saw me as family, rather than someone to bail them out of tight spots. I’m going to lose my sister either way, and the best I can do is make sure I don’t lose Kayla in the process.
Stacey and I discuss more about the next steps regarding guardianship. She prepares me for a long battle with the courts, especially because no one knows where Maura is still.
While I was on the phone, Ronnie came in. He went upstairs to his office without stopping. “Hey, boy, come on up here.”
I drop my rag on my stool and head up the stairs to Ronnie’s office. The office overlooks the shop, a loft over some storage space. He always says he wants to look out over his kingdom. But really I think he just never wanted to trust any of us not to fuck around instead of working.
“Hey Ronnie, what’s up?” I sit on the corner of his desk.
“You give any thought to buyin’ this place?” He asks, moving around papers, looking for something.
“I have. And I want to. I just want things to be settled with Kayla, or at least know the path we’re taking. They haven’t found Maura yet but got a tip she might be in Jersey. Can I have just a little bit more time? I’d be happy to take over though if you’d like to go on an extended vacation.”
Ronnie puts his papers down and stares at me, processing what I’ve said.
“I think an extended vacation might just keep the ol’ lady happy until you’re ready.”
“I think she’d like that,” I add.
“I’ll talk to her and let you know when we have a plan.” He nods indicating this conversation is over and I let myself out of the office without anymore from him.
I’m left to work on the corvette in silence with my memories of a seventeen year old Addy sitting on my toolbox sipping a milkshake, looking at me like I hung the moon.
God, I really fucked up with her. I wish I could be the man she deserves.
The man she deserves wouldn’t run away from her, even if it was to protect her. No matter what she tries to tell me.