22. Julia
22
JULIA
I stood outside the courthouse in downtown Buffalo. The wind whipped around me and I looked at my phone. “Eleven thirty,” I muttered. I wasn’t waiting for Jared outside any longer. I tugged my coat closer to me and burrowed down as far as I could get without coming out the other side.
It didn’t do much to protect me from the wind as it slithered its way down my collar, inviting goosebumps to my already uncomfortable state.
I grumbled, turned, and walked up the stairs.
When I walked through the door, I handed the security guard my briefcase and combed out my hair with my fingers, readjusting my coat.
I gave the guard a quick nod and a “Thank you,” and made my way through the metal detectors.
When I looked around, I still didn’t see them, and although I was warm, I checked my phone. “Dammit,” I said, seeing the message that just came through.
Jared said the court date got moved and he asked me to meet him back at the gym. I had all the mind to tell him no, but I needed to tell him how pissed off I was to his face and that I wouldn’t be coming down a second time.
Not because I expected him to change from it but because I was tired of hearing from him. Plus, I needed to say some things for me, just because I wanted to stand up for myself.
I didn’t text him back and instead, hopped into my car and hurried over to the gym. I parked in front of the building and fed the meter the lowest coin it would take, knowing I wouldn’t be in here long.
“Hey, Mark,” I said to the gym manager.
Mark smiled at me with kindness. It was nice to see something like that from my old life. It was nice to know that not everyone I left behind in Buffalo thought I was a fuck-up. “Hey, Julia,” he said. “It’s nice to see you.” He looked like he wanted to walk over to me and give me a hug, but he didn’t. I didn’t know if I was happy or sad about it, but I wasn’t here to overthink a possible gesture from an old acquaintance who came from my old life.
“Thanks, Mark. It’s nice to see you too.” I looked over my shoulder and into the gym. No one was here. I guess what Jared said was right. His business really was hurting. “Is Jared here? He asked me to meet him,” I said. I didn’t want to just barge in on him if he was working… On second thought, I didn’t care. I pointed in the direction of the office and walked down the hall without getting the okay from Mark.
I loved the fact that I really didn’t care anymore. It was freeing. I had uprooted my entire life because of him, and I wasn’t going to be taking shit from him again.
When I got down the hall, I twisted the knob and walked in, then froze.
Several dozen long-stem roses were sitting in crystal vases.
I looked over my shoulder and didn’t see anyone coming.
I walked into the office and searched the roses for traps or hidden meaning. It was hard to believe Jared would buy all of these for me when I told him I didn’t even want the daisies.
I sniffed the roses. They did smell nice.
I wished I would get something like this from Nick.
My heart twinged in pain at the thought, and I was swept away in a wave of ache. I didn’t know I missed him as much as I did. I really was good at avoiding my feelings. I hadn’t thought about him in days—well, I hadn’t let myself think about him in days specifically because I knew it would hurt.
I just didn’t know how much.
I touched a rose. Its petal was soft, and I chewed on my lip wondering what missing Nick meant, if it meant anything at all, or if I should pursue it.
A woman’s giggle skipped over the air, and I turned just in time to see a tall brunette woman planting a kiss on Jared's lips as both of them started to feel each other up. They had to know I was here, right?
Plus, why the fuck would Jared ask me to come to his gym if he didn’t know I was coming? I rolled my eyes and turned back toward the flowers, trying to think of what I should say. This wasn’t worth my time anymore.
“Oh, hey, Julia. Thanks for stopping by,” Jared said. “You didn’t text me that you were coming.” The woman of the hour was still on his arm. I balked. It was the woman who was suing Jared.
“Oh, my God,” I muttered. “What a joke,” I said, my eyes meeting his, then the woman’s. “I’m tickled to know you won’t drive down to see me again,” I said, not worrying about the woman’s shock. “Thank you for the reminder of what a dick you are,” I said, no longer feeling any aggression toward him. Instead, I was relieved. I walked past Jared and patted him on the shoulder. My eyes flicked to the woman’s. “Good luck. You’re going to need it,” I said.
I walked out of the office and called, “Please lose my number. I never want to hear from you again.” I pointed to the woman. “Check his phone and delete it for me if he doesn’t, please.”
“Julia!” Jared called. But I turned and kept walking. I could hear that woman’s squawking as I walked through the front lobby and out the door saying “goodbye” to Mark on my way into the cold. I didn't even feel bad that I hadn't apologized. I didn't think I was wrong for the way I treated her now.
“Fuck Jared. Never talk to him again,” Mia groaned.
“I won’t be. If I ever see him again, even within fifty feet of him, I’ll be filing a restraining order. Ugh.” I gagged, thinking about them fooling around in front of me. “It was so gross and strange, Mia,” I said. Deleting and blocking him were the first thing I did when I got into my car.
It was refreshing, and I felt the shackles of my past finally fall away for good. It was annoying that I drove two hours to Buffalo to find my justice, but even if Jared wasn’t going to get punished for the sexual harassment suit, the justice I got from the trip—that I was no longer chained to my past—was well worth the gas.
“Gross and strange could be his new advertising promo. How long do you think it will take you to get back?” Mia asked. I could hear her typing in the background.
“Probably about two hours. Are you thinking about taking a half-day, partner?”
“Heck, no.” She snorted. “We have enough work for three of us, let alone the two of us,” she stated. It was true. “I’m going to be meeting potentials today, so I wanted to make sure you’re on your way back in case I find anyone worth meeting a second time.”
I laughed. “You’re brutal. Maybe you should just let me interview them so you don’t scare all the people away.”
“I’m sure we’d have one left over,” she said.
“And that person would be desperate or some type of sociopath. I know how you work. Be nice to the people,” I pleaded.
“No, I weed out the weak ones and then you can butter them up with your sweetness and really keep them on their toes.” She cackled.
“Alright, don’t make me speed to make sure you don’t freak people out. If I do, you’re paying for the ticket,” I said.
“Yes, and we can both afford to because we have so many clients,” she said, then her humor dropped away. “See, I told you that you were good at your job.”
“Yes, you did,” I said. I released a long sigh.
“What’s wrong? We are swimming in clients, only a few are with the help from your wonderful, loyal, and amazing assistant?—”
“That’s a great way to pump yourself up.” I laughed.
“Well, someone gave me a lot of confidence, so I know how to say good things about myself now,” she said.
“You’re a freaking nerd,” I said.
“Takes one to know one, sister!” she said.
“Awesome.” I bit my lip and didn't want to say what I was thinking. But I battled with it, and “I miss Nick” fell from my lips anyway.
I turned onto the freeway and started to pick up speed to keep with the traffic.
“Don’t say anything, alright?” I said to Mia. “I’m just feeling vulnerable because of what happened with Jared, and I did catch some feelings for Nick in the midst of everything. But you were right. I can’t ruin things for us again?—”
“You didn’t ruin things. Jared did,” she said.
“Fine, but I don’t want the possibility of it happening again to even be on our radar,” I said.
“What if you protected your heart and kept your business stuff out of your relationship? I think you do need to guard yourself a little better, but I think you're taking too much of the blame and putting it on yourself. Like you want to kick yourself when you’re down,” she said.
I sat with what Mia was saying. “You think I’m trying to kick myself because things are going well?” I asked.
“Yeah. You had Jared to do that before. Now you don’t have that.” Mia released a long, dramatic sigh. “And as much as I hate to admit it because I don’t know that sleeping with a client is the right call for either of us, Nick doesn’t seem like the asshole Jared was.”
She paused for just long enough that it seemed as though I dropped the call. Then she said, “Just the fact that he’s kept away from you this long after you told him not to come around says something about his boundaries. They’re in a better place,” she said.
“He did come over when I told him I was doing something with you,” I pointed out, waiting for her to take the bait and tell me that she was joking. I’d never heard her rationalize about a guy before. She was pretty cynical about life.
“But did you really tell him not to come over?” Mia asked. “Because he is pretty old, he might not understand how dating works now. You might have told him what you were doing—at home with your awesome friend, but maybe he didn’t get the code. Things were more patriarchal back when he was a young buck,” she said.
I snorted. “That’s a backhanded way of saying something nice, Mia,” I said.
She laughed. I pictured her raising her hands up in surrender when she said, “All I’m saying is that I’ve seen Jared in action. I’ve seen Nick in action. I’ve seen them both interacting with you. And it’s different. Nick is different. I still don’t think you should bone clients, but that’s all,” she said.
I didn’t say anything for a while because I didn't know what to say. It was interesting to hear Mia sticking up for anyone. Not that what she was doing was exactly sticking up for Nick, but she wasn’t trashing him fully. That meant something, even if she wasn’t willing to admit it.
“Alright, you obviously have to drive home. And my first interview is coming up in a bit. I want to get ready with some questions,” Mia said.
“I don’t like the tone in your voice, young lady,” I said.
“Ew. You just sounded like my grandmother,” she responded.
“Will it get you to stop thinking about being a dick to the people who are coming in?” I asked.
“Mmm, maybe,” she said. I could hear the lie on her lips.
“Fine. Just don’t do anything that could get us sued, alright? Since things are finally looking up, I want to make sure they stay that way,” I said.
“Yes, Ma’am!”