Chapter 7
Murphy’s Law of Romance, #8
“Brains x Beauty x Ambition = Constant trouble”
“It had that strong an effect on you?”
Dr. Bateman leaned over the table to hear her answer above the noise in the crowded Starbucks. Toni had answered that same damn question three times already. She wasn’t going to shout it out again, so she nodded. She took a sip of her ‘why bother?,’ a large decaf latte, and wished this meeting was over. She’d called Bateman on her car phone driving back to Seattle to get it over with. Unfortunately, the man insisted on meeting her, so she picked her Starbucks in the Blanchard Building on 4 th Avenue, close to home, and as public as possible. She wasn’t about to meet him alone at the office on a weekend.
“Amazing.” Bateman rubbed his large nose thoughtfully, gazing at the open page of the Psychology Now article, a disturbing gleam in his eye. “We have to get that formula as soon as possible.”
Toni gave him a questioning look. “Starling is contractually required to give you first option to buy it if he wants to sell .”
Bateman frowned at her impatiently. “Yes , a year from now if he wants to sell. With another year in development and production, we won’t see anything for at least two whole years .”
He waved a hand and then gripped his coffee cup, sudden enthusiasm animating him. “Think of it. Even with limited production, we could distribute the ‘cozy’ formula to our retailers. Our major customers are women, and our salespeople sell by making friends, building trust. With that scent permeating our counters and stores, sales would skyrocket.”
Toni wrinkled her nose. His ideas smelled of bad juju. It struck her as downright creepy, and a truck load of legal exposure. “Well, from what I understand, it only works for men on women. Women sell our cosmetics.” She paused with a quirk of her mouth. “I don’t think Starling has tested for girl-on-girl action.”
He waved away the objections. “So? What’s the problem?” Toni gave him a dubious frown. “We do it differently. We hire men. The men wouldn’t have to be good at sales.”
Whoa, gotta put the brakes on this. “Starling might not want to sell it at all.” The possibility of Bateman getting his hands on the ‘cozy” formula sent chills up through her tail bone and when they reached her neck, knotted it tight.
Bateman gave her a squinty-eyed glare, as though he hated being reminded of the agreement. “I want that formula.”
Toni took another sip of her latté and shrugged. “I don’t see how you can get it in less than a year.”
“You can get it.” It wasn’t a suggestion. “He’ll see you.”
Toni set down her cup and set her fists on the table. “Dr. Bateman, I am not a buyer for Rayaneta, nor a spy, and I’m certainly not a sneak thief. I’m a lawyer. Corporate espionage is not part of my job description.”
He gave her an ugly look and said through his teeth, “Just convince him to modify the agreement and sell it to us now.” He gulped down the rest of his coffee. “ That is part of your job description.”
“How? Offer him money? It would take a lot of money. The guy is a millionaire twenty times over.” She shook her head, having no desire to visit Starling again. “What possible inducement could you offer him?”
He smiled. “Not me, you.”
Toni curled her lip. “Oh, good, now it’s prostitution?” She stood and picked up her briefcase.
“Sit down. I wasn’t suggesting any such thing.” Toni sat. Right, Chief. You weren’t on the receiving end of your smirk.
Bateman eyed her for a moment, rubbing his nose some more. That was becoming an annoying habit that bode nothing good. “Obviously, Starling is aware of your reputation and ethics, Ms. Crenshaw, so he trusts you.”
Toni blinked at his conclusion. Seriously? She pursed her lips. “As opposed to you and the Board, you mean?”
Bateman gave her the evil eye again and said in a harsh, impatient tone, “I want you to talk him into selling that ‘cozy’ formula immediately, not a year from now. How you do it is your business.”
“And what do I get if I succeed?”
Bateman chuckled. “Of course. What do you want, another raise?”
Hoping to discourage him, she shot for the moon. “Lead counsel for Rayaneta, the position, the salary, the perks, the whole shooting match.”
“You want Stan Ackerman’s job?”
“Why not? I’ve been doing his job for more than a year now, as if you didn’t know.”
He ignored the comment and eyed her. “You’d be Rich Yates’ boss.” Sitting back in his chair, he said, “You don’t want much, do you, Crenshaw?
Good, he’ll baulk and drop his request. “Neither do you, Mr. Bateman.”
He thought for a moment, and then leaned forward. “If you get this ‘cozy’ formula to us and any ‘romantic’ scents with similar effects before the year is out, then yes, you’ll be lead counsel for Rayaneta.”
Toni crossed her arms astounded. “I’ll want that in writing, signed by you as Chairman.” There, that should give him pause, to have it in writing. It should kibosh this idea of his.
After eyeing her silently, Bateman snarled, “Fine. Write it up. Just get me those damned formulas.” He stood and looking down at her, said, “Keep me informed of your progress,” and walked out. It took a minute for Toni to realize her mouth was open, again. It had been a jaw-dropping morning.
Parked in front of Starbucks, Toni sat in her Wrangler for a long time staring at nothing, feeling strangely numb. Lead counsel was now within reach, but not how she’d imagined earning it. She felt dirty thinking over her deal with Bateman.
Toni shook her head. After all, she’d simply agreed to talk Starling into selling his formulas in the next few months instead of a year. That’s it.
No, if she was honest with herself, she didn’t want Bateman to ever get his hands on “cozy” or Starling’s prospective love potion. The potential for misuse of the fragrances frightened her at least as much as the job offer enticed her. A real conflict of interest, Crenshaw.
Bateman’s belief that Starling ‘trusted her’ because of her ethics also disturbed her. Why would he? After she’d been involved in what he now must know was a scandalous contract. On the other hand, she had saved his sabbatical. Was that trust why Starling had asked for her as liaison with the Board? He didn’t know her or her work other than a meeting two years ago—or did he? Crap. She was going to have to see the son-of-a-bitch again.
She started the engine, deciding that she would go home and soak in a hot bath, sip a rum and Coke, and not think about any of this for the rest of the weekend. She’d call Starling on Monday.
~ ~ ~
Two days later, it was a blonde and bouncy barefoot girl in a short terrycloth robe who greeted her at Starling’s door. With a smile as big as the Montana sky and sparkly green eyes, Miss Stay Fresh said, “Hi, howarya?” and stepped back to let Toni in. “I’m Bonnie. You’re in time for lunch.” Her Midwestern twang was as evident as her cheerleader tan.
She led Toni through the main room, the center now filled with the assembled gym equipment and mats. Out one window, Toni saw a bikini-clad brunette dive into the pool. Jeez, Starling didn’t waste time.
Suspicious, she sniffed but couldn’t detect any aromas from Saturday or anything but plastic mats and furniture polish. Bracing herself, she was ushered into the adjoining dining area. The entire room was encircled by windows with views of the lake, pool, and gardens. Bonnie went over and poked Sam Banks in the ribs by way of a hug, surprising him because he’d been intent on setting out salad and soup bowls on a table with chairs for twelve people.
Sam turned and took a shot at Bonnie’s ribs, but she danced out of the way, laughing. She said, “I’ll get the sweet tea,” and disappeared into the kitchen.
Sam smiled at Toni. “Afternoon, Ms. Crenshaw.” He pointed after Bonnie. “You’ve met my sister. She had to see my new digs. She’s visiting with her friend.”
“Joan,” said the short brunette walking in wet and toweling off. She shook hands with Toni and told Sam, “I’ll run down the hall and get a robe. Be back quick time.”
Oh, his sister and her friend. Toni mentally chided herself. What was wrong with her? Starling wasn’t capable of creating Bimbo Land here, not yet at any rate, and Sam, as old school as he appeared didn’t seem the Playboy Mansion type either.
“Where is the good doctor?”
Sam chuckled at that. “Where else? In his lab.” He pointed with his head toward the back of the house. “Why don’t you go tell him lunch is ready.”
Toni walked down a carpeted hallway past three spacious bedrooms and an office. One bedroom with two beds was obviously being occupied by women on vacation. Clothes were strewn everywhere, and another was clearly Sam’s. It was a Midwestern version of a bachelor pad, complete with car parts on a desk, a shotgun leaning against the wall and posters of various game birds, including one of Sports Illustrated model Kate Upton. Why weren’t the girls staying in the guest house?
Weird. What was Banks doing with Starling? Toni wondered what Starling made of the ‘bothering’ potential of all these people in his house. In fact, she wondered what Starling thought of his two female guests. They were certainly attractive.
Toni entered the last room at the hallway’s end through double doors. She found an expansive laboratory with a granite floor, picture windows and a sliding glass door leading onto a slate-tiled patio outside with a hot tub, no less. She sniffed the air. Just a hint of sweetness. Pipes, cords, and computer connections were hung everywhere, and the air system hummed loudly. She relaxed. One wall was taken up by a sink, counter, and glass-fronted lab refrigerator. Bent over one of the long black tables, hidden by multiple computer screens and glass bottles, stood Starling, in a royal blue lab coat.
She walked right up to him, but he didn’t notice, and certainly couldn’t hear her approach over the noise of the ventilating system, that is, if he hadn’t been wearing headphones. She sniffed a couple of times to be sure she wasn’t under the influence before speaking loudly. “Afternoon, Dr. Starling.”
He paused his writing in a red binder and looked at her. “Hi.” It wasn’t the same open smile as last visit, a tenth of the wattage. He removed the head gear, and then stood, looking down at her without saying more.
Still angry with his request for ‘help,’ she said more archly than intended, “Lunch is ready.”
“Ah, yes.” He frowned at the workbench as though unhappy to leave it but wrote in the notebook and then indicated she should go first. At the door, he took off the lab coat and hung it on a wall hook. Underneath he was wearing a black T-shirt and brand-new jeans, no belt.
“What happened to your white lab coat?”
“Bonnie thought blue was better than institutional white, more approachable.”
“Seriously? I take it you want to be approachable in the lab?”
He smiled with a sideways glance at her comment. “No, not really. The color is calming, and it doesn’t look dirty as quickly as white. But I do want to be approachable in any surveys and public work I do. Bonnie and Joan thought it made my eyes stand out, whatever that means.”
“So, you’re going to wear it to your next bar fight?” Toni teased, unable to stop herself.
Starling eyed her with what she thought was a rather cute, bemused smile. His eyes didn’t need any help to stand out with his light tan. Toni looked away. Without his coke bottle glasses, they were down-right hypnotic, like looking into sunlight reflected off the blue depths of Lake Sammamish. He didn’t appear at all puppyish. It made her uneasy, and she flinched when he suddenly raised his hand, indicating she should lead down to the dining room.
To cover her unease, she said, “So since yesterday, the girls arrived, the air system was fixed, and you have a new lab coat.”
“Yes, yesterday was a busy one. Bonnie found a Seattle medical store selling the lab coats.”
Lunch was fun even if Toni was anxious to get the business concluded and be gone. The two girls were lively and the conversation surprisingly engaging. Sam and they made Toni feel a part of their ad hoc family as well. She thought wistfully of boisterous dinners with her family in Brooklyn, suddenly missing them.
Bonnie and Joan were traveling the whole West Coast for the summer and according to them, “planned to see everything.” They knew enough people living in the coastal states, including Bonnie’s brother, to make the road trip feasible. From the way Sam teased Bonnie, he was obviously proud of his sister. It was just as obvious that she’d now awarded Starling with the mantle of ‘honorary brother.’ She and Joan called him BJ, the initials of his first and middle names. They gently teased him throughout the lunch. Starling spoke little, laughed at the repartee, which he followed with the unerring attention of a hound after a hare, a little half-smile always on his lips.
Just as the lunch was winding down, a call came in. Sam told Starling that it was Dr. Ling. Starling jumped up, but stopped and stared into space for a moment, and then turned, saying, “Ms. Crenshaw, I have to take this. I’ll be about fifteen minutes. Is that all right?”
What could she say? No? When she nodded, he turned to Bonnie. “The sun is out again. Would you keep Ms. Crenshaw company, perhaps out by the pool until I’m done?”
Bonnie smiled at him and then Toni. “Sure, BJ. Love to.” Starling and Sam left for the phone call—both of them? Bonnie and Toni found adjoining lounge chairs outside, the air cool and sunlight warm. Bonnie dropped her robe revealing an athletic body and patterned bikini underneath. She grinned at Toni’s quizzical expression. “Ya gotta get your suntan when you can around here.”
As Bonnie lay down on a lounge chair, Joan came out to sunbathe too, tossing a bottle of suntan lotion to her.
Toni asked, “Who is Dr. Ling?” Starling better not even think about selling his formula overseas.
Bonnie shrugged as she rubbed on the lotion. “He’s a scientist back East. Or is it China? I don’t remember. What Ling does, I couldn’t tell you, but BJ and Sam have had a few calls from him since he contacted BJ by email.”
“Oh.” Toni thought for a moment, filing the name away, and decided Bonnie couldn’t answer any more questions about the mysterious Dr. Ling, so she changed the subject. “What are you studying, at . . .?”
“Emory. I’m getting an MA in child psychology and counseling.”
That surprised Toni. “Oh, and do what?”
Bonnie gave her an amused glance. “Work with children.” She set her shades on her nose and laid back.
“Okay, stupid question.” Toni had her sunglasses in the pocket of her jacket, so she followed suit, and kicked off her shoes. There was nothing she could do about the blouse and slacks, but she did toss the jacket over a nearby chair.
Without turning her head, Bonnie said, “We have a spare swimsuit if you want.”
Toni was sorely tempted, but decided she needed all the professionalism she could muster for her meeting with ‘The Doc.’
“No, but thanks. So, as a child psychologist, what do you make of Dr. Starling?”
Bonnie laughed and shook her head. “I think he’s a doll. Crazy smart, unassuming, and without a devious bone in his body.” She eased over onto one elbow. “He’s been culturally deprived, poor guy. I do think the Boy Wonder is going to be a quite a man when his hormones kick in.”
“His what?”
Telling secrets, she leaned toward Toni and said in a quieter voice, “Starling has basically been undernourished for over a decade. He simply doesn’t pay attention. Sam says he would go a day without realizing he hadn’t eaten. You notice he doesn’t have a beard?”
“Yeah, so?”
“His diet has been low protein, high carbs, and very unbalanced.”
“You’re saying he’s been starving himself?”
“No, not exactly. It’s poor nutrition for years, though he did take vitamins. Several hormones, particularly testosterone, have basically shut down. As he’s lived in a lab the last dozen years eating maybe 1700 calories a day, his hormonal systems never turned on completely. It happens to athletes, particularly dedicated marathon runners, as well as those who eat too little. Women stop having periods and men don’t grow whiskers and their sex drive disappears. Sam has him exercising and eating right. Sooner or later, BJ’s going to get a great, big hormonal surprise.”
“You’ve studied this?” That could explain his lack of typical male responses.
“A little with child development, but most of it is Sam. He’s always been interested in sports nutrition.” Her smile turned sad at that, but added, “Considering how tall BJ’s grown even with his lack of nourishment, his ‘awakening’ should be fun to see.” Bonnie wiggled her eyebrows and sighed. “It’s too bad I’m not going to be here. I’d love to help Sam educate him.”
Toni stared at Bonnie. “Seriously?”
“Oh, yeah. With his boyish enthusiasm, intelligence, and good looks, he’s going to be seriously dangerous.”
“So, you like him?”
Bonnie turned her head and lowered her sunglasses. “What’s not to like?”
It didn’t make much sense. “Well, you’ve only seen him away from the Rayaneta lab.”
Bonnie smiled and lay back down. “Oh, I’ve seen him in the lab.”
Not the original mad scientist. Toni tried another tack. “Okay, so what’s with your middle-American brother and Professor Test Tube? I don’t get what their bromance is all about.”
On her lounge chair, Joan chuckled. Bonnie made a face, and said, “You’re from New York, aren’t you?”
“What, too sarcastic?”
Bonnie lay back down. “Yeah, a little.” After a moment, she shrugged one shoulder. “It’s not all that complicated. Sam thinks the world of BJ, and BJ feels the same about Sam. Each thinks the other is brilliant.” She grinned behind her sunglasses. “Of course, I agree with them both.”
Toni heard the men coming back. Bonnie turned on her stomach and took off her glasses. “You be nice to BJ, you hear, Ms. Crenshaw? I want him to stay sweet and unsullied.”
“Unsullied, huh?” Toni stood. “Call me Toni. I’ll try to be nice, Bonnie, but with him you’re asking me to hit a moving target.” Bonnie laughed and put her glasses back on. Toni left her card on Bonnie’s towel. “If you have any suggestions, or warnings, give me a call. I can use all the help I can get.”
“Will do.”