Chapter 12
TWELVE
Kinsley
“Mom, you’re home!” I rush into my mom’s arms, having missed her like crazy even though it’s only been a few days since she left and we’ve talked every day that she’s been gone. “How was your trip?”
“Busy,” she says. “It’s good to be back home in our quiet little town.” She laughs. “I actually got in last night, but when I came by to see you, you weren’t home.”
She raises a curious brow, and my thoughts go back to last night. The rest of the evening with Shane was spent with delicious food and drinks, conversation, and laughter. I thought it would be awkward, but true to his word, he pretended like the kiss never happened.
I wish I could say the same thing, but the truth is, when I got home, I couldn’t stop thinking about it. And those thoughts turned into fantasies, and before I knew it, I was pleasuring myself to the thoughts of Shane doing more than kissing me.
“I went out for a drink and food with a friend,” I say vaguely.
When she smirks, I roll my eyes, remembering my dad was there last night and he tells my mom everything.
“He’s just a friend ,” I insist, making it a point to emphasize the word friend —for her sake and mine.
“Uh-huh,” she says. “I was thinking we could go get coffee and pedicures. Make it a mother-daughter afternoon. What do you say?”
“I say that sounds perfect. Let me change, and then we can go.”
Since I had a couple of appointments this morning, I’m wearing my Exposed Ink shirt, so I change out of it, leaving my jeans on, and throw on a soft beige sweater since it’s cool out.
When I step out of my room, I find my mom looking through the stack of books from Taylor.
“You’re reading again?” she asks, hopefulness laced in her words.
“Yeah.”
After devouring the firefighter romance Julia lent me and returning it to her at our last session, I couldn’t stop and ended up reading all the books Taylor lent me.
Speaking of which …
“We should go have coffee at Books and Beans. Taylor, Shane’s daughter, lent me these books, and she works there. If she’s there, I’d like to return them to her.”
It will mean not having to see Shane outside of the tattoo shop, and I enjoy her company. Win-win.
“Sounds good.”
* * *
When we walk into Books and Beans, I immediately spot Taylor, standing behind the counter, talking with someone. She looks up at the sound of the doorbell chiming, and a smile spreads across her face.
“Kinsley!” She rushes around the counter and envelops me in a hug. “I was just asking my dad this morning when we were going to see you again. I saw the addition to his sleeve you did, and it looks so good.”
“Thanks. I’m glad I can ink your work onto him so he can have them as memories.”
“Are you here for coffee or books or both?” she asks.
My mom laughs at her upbeat personality, and Taylor turns her attention to her.
“You must be Kinsley’s mom. You have the same smile.”
Mom’s grin widens. “I am. I’m Quinn.”
She extends her hand, but Taylor ignores it, wrapping her arms around her. “It’s so nice to meet you. Kinsley told me you love reading. I can’t wait to see your library one day!”
“You’re welcome over anytime,” Mom tells her.
“Here are your books,” I say, handing Taylor the tote bag of books.
Taylor eyes the bag and frowns. “Did you not want to read them? I don’t mind how long you borrow them for.”
“Quite the opposite,” I admit with a laugh. “I devoured them all.”
Taylor’s eyes widen. “Dang, you are a hard-core reader. I like it.” Then, her eyes light up. “Oh! I have a BookTok account. You should go live with me so we can discuss the books. It would be so much fun, and I can totally name-drop your shop.” She winks dramatically, making my mom laugh. “Not to brag, but I have, like, fifty million followers.”
“What?” I gasp because I’m pretty sure I have, like, twenty—and not with the word million following it. Like, literally just twenty. And half of them are probably my family.
“My dad helped me make it a couple of years ago because I wanted to post about the books I’d read and loved, and it totally blew up. He used to monitor it, but now that I’m seventeen, he trusts me to handle it. He won’t let me touch any of the money it brings in, but it’s going into my savings account.”
She waggles her brows, and my mom and I laugh. The girl has such a big personality.
“So, what do you say? Want to go live with me to talk books?”
“I’d love to,” I tell her.
“Cool!” She beams. “So, books or coffee or both?”
“Both,” Mom and I say in unison.
After ordering our lattes and pastries, we sit on one of the comfy couches.
“She’s fun,” Mom says, nodding toward Taylor, who’s helping another customer. “I’m glad you’re getting out again … even if it’s just simply making friends.”
“They haven’t really given me much of a choice,” I grumble, taking a sip of my coffee. “Shane keeps showing up, and his daughter makes it hard to say no to her.”
Mom chuckles. “Oh, if you didn’t want them around, you’d make it clear.”
She quirks a brow, daring me to argue, and I roll my eyes.
“So, what are you reading?” I ask, hoping she’ll drop the subject of Shane.
“A curvy single mom romance,” she says with a grin. “She meets a sexy younger tattoo artist, and he won’t stop until she agrees to go on a date with him.”
“Sounds a lot like yours and dad’s love story.”
“Right?” she agrees and then proceeds to tell me all about the book, leaving the topic of Shane behind.
* * *
“Ugh, I’m exhausted,” Taylor says a little while later as she dramatically plops onto the couch next to us. “This whole working life isn’t for me.” She brings her hand to her forehead and sighs, making Mom and me laugh.
“You’ll get used to it,” I say, patting her knee. “Are you on break?”
“Nope.” Her green eyes pop open. “I’m off. Came in at six a.m. for the early shift.”
“We’re going to get pedicures,” I find myself saying. “Want to join us?”
Taylor’s eyes light up. “Yes! I’m totally in need of a good pedi. We’re going to be heading to Florida for cheer camp soon, which will mean plenty of pool and beach time. Gotta make sure my toes look cute.”
Mom snorts out a laugh while I shake my head.
“Okay, let’s go.”
Since the nail salon is in walking distance, we leave Taylor’s and Mom’s cars in the parking lot and head over.
The salon isn’t super busy, so they’re able to sit us next to each other, and the entire time, Taylor chats away about everything and anything. I learn she was in a relationship for a while, but the guy cheated on her with her now ex-friend. Casey is talking to a guy on the football team, and since Taylor is single, she feels left out, but she’s trying to be supportive since Casey was always supportive of her relationship with her ex.
She’s heavily involved in cheer, and she has a competition coming up. She gets good grades and plans to go to NYU for graphic design. A lot of this I already know from Shane, but I enjoy listening and getting to know her, so I don’t mention that, simply letting her talk.
“Kinsley went to NYU,” my mom says with a proud smile. “Maybe she can take you on a private tour. Show you behind the scenes.”
Taylor gasps. “Oh my God, that would be awesome!”
Taylor’s phone goes off, but when she checks it, her smile morphs into a frown.
“Everything okay?” I ask.
“Yeah, I was supposed to have dinner with Casey, but she bailed on me to hang out with the guy she’s talking to.” She rolls her eyes like it doesn’t bother her, but I can tell it does.
“Why don’t we go to dinner?” I offer. “I don’t have any plans, and I’ve been wanting to check out that new hibachi restaurant that opened, but it seems weird to go alone. Do you like hibachi?”
“Oh, yes!” Taylor squeals, clapping her hands. “I’ve been wanting to go to that place.”
“Mom?” I ask, turning toward my mom.
“Oh, no, you girls go and have a good time. I have a date tonight with my husband.”
She waggles her brows, and Taylor giggles while I mock gag.
Twenty-five years later, and I’m still not used to the amount of PDA I’ve had to witness between my parents over the years. I can’t even tell you how many times my siblings and I have walked in on them or heard them when they thought no one was home.
On the other hand, I love that my parents love each other so fiercely. It’s what I wanted for myself, and the thought that I’ll never have it again makes me sad. Yet I can’t bring myself to move on because the fact is, I already had it, and I destroyed it.
The rest of our pedicure is spent talking about various books we’ve read and loved and the hundreds we have on our Tbr list. Once our feet are clean and pretty, we walk back to the cars, and Mom takes off.
Since Taylor drove, I hop into her Jeep with her, and she puts the top down, swearing it’s the only way to ride in a Jeep. I love her free spirit, and as she drives us down Main Street, I can’t help but feel like maybe Shane and Taylor were meant to come into my life.
Before them, I was barely living, but since I met them, I’ve gone out, dancing and drinking, started reading romance again, and I’m currently singing pop songs at the top of my lungs with Taylor as we cruise through town.
But when Taylor pulls into a parking spot in front of the restaurant, my eyes lock with Shane’s, who’s leaning against the side of the building, and my stomach drops. Because as much as I enjoy their company, hanging out with him is also hard, especially knowing how attracted I am to him while trying like hell not to act on it. Because when I do, the guilt eats me up inside—something I spoke about with Julia during our last session.
I whip my head around to look at Taylor and she at least has the decency to look a little sheepish when she says, “He texted, asking what I was doing for dinner, so I figured he could meet us. You guys are friends, right?”
She bats her lashes at me, telling me she knows exactly what she’s done, and I groan.
“Taylor, if you knew I’d be okay with him going, you would’ve mentioned it, but you didn’t, which tells me you thought there was a small chance I wouldn’t be.”
Taylor sighs. “You’re right. It’s just that my dad really likes you. He talks about you all the time, and I don’t know why, but you don’t want to give him a chance, so I thought maybe if I gave you a shove in the right direction, you’d see how awesome he is.” She shrugs. “I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have done that, and if you want to cancel, I’ll tell him it’s all my fault. He honestly thought you were on board.”
“I’m not going to cancel, but in the future, I need you to be honest. I consider you a friend, and friends don’t go behind each other’s back.”
Taylor nods in understanding. “Can I ask why you don’t like my dad?”
Oh boy … I wasn’t prepared to have this conversation with Shane’s daughter—and not while he’s standing fifteen feet away and we’re sitting in her Jeep.
“It’s not your dad,” I tell her honestly. “Three years ago, I was married and pregnant, and I lost my husband and baby girl in a car crash that I’d caused while I was driving.”
Taylor gasps, her hands going to her mouth. “Kinsley, I’m so sorry.”
“It’s okay,” I choke out, blinking back the tears that are filling my eyelids. “You couldn’t have known. Your dad seems like a wonderful man, but I’m just not in a place to love someone the way they deserve.”
“But what about you?” she asks. “Don’t you deserve to be loved? Finding love after loss is a popular trope for a reason. Because everyone deserves to find love. What if my dad is the man you’re meant to fall in love with? He’s such a good guy.
“He takes care of me and loves me enough for my mom and him since she hates staying in one place for too long, and I know he would love you so much if you let him.”
Her words cause the threatening tears to fall.
“I’m sure he could,” I say, forcing a watery smile on my lips. “But he deserves better than a heartbroken woman who can’t love him the way he deserves to be loved.”
“Everything okay?” Shane asks, making me jump.
I was so focused on Taylor that I forgot he was here.
“Yeah.” I clear my throat. “Everything’s good.”
Shane doesn’t look convinced, but he nods.
“I didn’t tell Kinsley you were meeting us for dinner,” Taylor admits, throwing herself under the bus.
While I’m not thrilled about what she did, I can respect her taking responsibility. It also speaks volumes of their relationship that she knows she can tell her dad anything.
Shane sighs. “I’m sorry. I don’t have your number, so I didn’t even think to ask if you knew and were okay with it.”
“It’s all good,” I say, hopping out of the Jeep. “Taylor and I spoke. Now, let’s go eat.”
When I look back and see Shane hasn’t moved, I grab his hand and pull him along. “Come on, you two! A hungry Kinsley is a cranky Kinsley.”