Chapter 26
TWENTY-SIX
Kinsley
“There’s a lot of people here,” I say, not realizing I said the words out loud until Shane tightens his hold on my hand.
“It’s for the entire station,” he explains. “I work shift A with four other guys, but there are four shifts at our station, plus everyone’s families.”
I nod in understanding, keeping quiet since there’s a nervous lump in my throat. We live in a small town, and news travels quickly, so the moment I moved into my parents’ pool house, everyone knew about the accident. It’s one of the reasons why I barely left, aside from going to the shop a couple of years later. Everywhere I went, people, especially moms who were my age, would shoot me sympathetic looks while elderly women would offer me their condolences and bring my mom dishes for me. It was all too much. I never knew what to say, so I stopped leaving so I wouldn’t have to say anything.
Honestly, I’m surprised Shane didn’t know my story before I told it to him. The only reason I can guess is because he’s not one to gossip. He seems to stay in his own lane, focusing on himself and his daughter.
“Hey,” Shane says. “Are you okay?” He stops before we make it to where everyone is hanging out and looks at me with concern. “If you don’t want to be here …”
“I do,” I whisper. “I want to be here.”
And that’s the truth. I want to be here for him and Taylor, who got home this morning and hugged me tightly, telling me that she got in for the campus tour at NYU and how excited she is to see the city through my eyes. I want to be a part of their family, to make them as happy as they make me.
“Okay,” Shane says, the furrow in his brow deepening.
I hate that he feels like he has to worry about me. That, instead of simply enjoying the barbecue, he needs to make sure I’m okay. I know he says I’m strong, but sometimes, I feel really damn weak.
“If anything changes, if you want to leave … just let me know, and we’ll go. I’m off today, so I don’t have to be here.”
He leans in and presses a soft kiss to my lips, and I sigh into his touch.
“Thank you,” I whisper against his lips.
He introduces me to several people, whose names I’ll sadly never remember because there are too many people, and then he grabs us a drink.
“Evans,” a gentleman yells. “You ready to get this grill going?”
“Duty calls,” Shane says, giving me a quick kiss on my cheek. “Want to join me?”
“Sure.”
I don’t know anyone, and Taylor immediately took off to chat with people she knows.
We go inside the station, and Shane gives me a quick tour of the place. It looks more like a house than what I’d imagine a fire station would look like.
When he shows me where he sleeps, I can’t help but give him a hard time.
“Is this where you lie in bed and think of me?”
I plop onto the mattress and bounce a little, and Shane groans.
“You know I think of you all the time,” he says, pulling me back up and pushing me gently against the wall. “But I try not to think of you like that while I’m here since I’m surrounded by four other guys, and it would suck to get a hard-on and not be able to do anything about it.”
He rubs his pelvis against me, and I feel his bulge forming.
“Well, I’m here now.” I reach down and cup him through the material of his shorts. Then, after unzipping them, I pull his hard length out.
Dropping to my knees, I give his swollen head an open-mouthed kiss and then slide his velvety-smooth shaft in and out of my mouth.
“Oh fuck,” he groans, which spurs me on to take him all the way down my throat.
“What do you say, Evans?” I glance up from giving him head. “Think you can be quick and quiet?”
“Oh, Sour Patch.” He chuckles. “You’re the one who’s going to be screaming my name.”
He pulls me to my feet and slants his mouth against mine as he lifts me against the wall, pushes my jean skirt to my hips, and shoves my panties to the side.
A few minutes later, true to his word, we’re both moaning each other’s name as Shane fucks me against the wall until we find our release.
“I’m never going to be able to sleep in here again without thinking about fucking you against the wall,” he says as he carries me to the bathroom so we can get cleaned up.
“Good.” I kiss the corner of his jaw. “I like knowing that you’re thinking about me because I’m always thinking about you.”
The boyish grin he grants me causes butterflies to attack my chest.
Once we’re cleaned up, he finishes showing me around, and then we head to the kitchen. He makes the patties for the burgers and prepares the chicken for the grill while I cut up the veggies. Then, we take everything back outside to where the grill is.
“Shane!” a petite woman says, waddling over, looking like she’s ready to pop, with a gentleman who’s sporting an identical shirt to the one Shane is wearing, telling me he’s a firefighter as well.
“Sandra.” Shane gives her a kiss on her cheek. “Kinsley, this is Sandra and David Fowler. David works the same shift as me.”
“It’s nice to meet you,” I tell them.
“Actually,” David says, “we already met. I was with Shane when you had that allergic reaction.”
“Oh,” I breathe, mortified.
Shane chuckles and pulls me into his side. “I hate that you ingested raw fruit, but I’m damn glad you forgot your EpiPen,” he says, making everyone laugh.
While Shane grills the burgers and chicken, I help a few other women set up the side dishes on the serving tables.
Once the food is ready, everyone flocks over, making their plates. Since Shane is cleaning the grill, I make us each a plate and then have a seat.
“Hey!” Taylor drops into the seat next to me. “I’m starved.” She bites into her burger and then moans. “So good. Dad is seriously the best cook.”
“That he is,” I agree, taking a bite of my chicken. “Have you finished the new Evaline Winters book yet?”
“Oh my God, I’m reading it now!” she says, though it comes out muffled since her mouth is full.
“Taylor,” Shane chides, sitting across from us. “Don’t speak with your mouth full.”
Taylor rolls her eyes but waits until she’s done chewing before she continues, “That book is making me so mad. How far along are you? I don’t want to give you any spoilers.”
“I already finished it,” I admit sheepishly.
“What? How? It’s so freaking long!”
“Yesterday, I had to draw up a few designs for some upcoming appointments, so I was listening while I was drawing.”
“I feel like that’s totally cheating,” Taylor says, “but also kind of brilliant.”
“Reading is reading,” I tell her with a shrug. “E-book, paperback, audiobook … doesn’t matter.”
“Fine,” she concedes, “I’ll give it to you, but that means I get to bitch because seriously, that hero is making me so mad. How does a man so stupid run such a successful business? The miscommunication trope is the worst,” she whines in between taking bites of her food. “Like, you run all these businesses, but you can’t just talk to her?”
Shane chuckles. “It’s a guy thing.”
“No.” Taylor shakes her head. “That’s a lame excuse. Be better.”
We both laugh and then continue to eat while Taylor spends the next twenty minutes listing everything that’s wrong with the book. And since she’s completely right about all of it, all I can do is agree.
* * *
“Hey, Evans!” Fred, another firefighter Shane introduced me to earlier, calls out. “Come be on my team, so we can kick these guys’ butts.”
Shane glances from Fred to me hesitantly, looking like he’s unsure if he wants to leave me. While I appreciate him staying by my side all afternoon, I also want him to enjoy himself.
“Go,” I insist. “I’m good. I can watch you play and ogle you from here.”
Shane chuckles. “All right. I’ll be back.” With a kiss that promises there’s more to come later, he gets up and runs over to join the guys.
I’m watching them play while nursing my lemonade when a woman walks over and introduces herself as Pamela. I recognize her as one of the women who attends the yoga classes Mom and I have been to at the health club.
“I must admit,” she says, taking a sip of wine cooler and having a seat next to me, “I was holding out hope that Jamie would pull her head out of her ass and put her family back together, but she’s clearly too late.”
“Jamie?” I ask in confusion because there’s only one Jamie I know and …
“Shane’s ex.” She shakes her head like she can’t believe I don’t know who she’s talking about. “We were friends in high school.”
“Right.” I nod, dreading where this conversation is going and wishing Shane would come back to save me, but he’s too distracted by trash-talking with the other guys. “Haven’t they been broken up for a while though?”
Shane said she took off when Taylor was a baby.
“Technically,” she says, lowering her voice, like she’s revealing a secret. “But everyone knew they would still hook up when she came into town.” She giggles, and her drink sloshes out of her bottle and onto her hand and dress. “Whoops.”
She laughs it off like she’s not a drunken mess, and I force a smile, feeling sick to my stomach.
“Anyway,” she continues, “with Shane never dating, we all thought maybe one day …” She leans in closer, and more of her drink spills. When it almost hits me, I stand, having had enough. “But it looks like he’s moved on,” she finishes, standing right along with me, clearly not taking the hint.
“Yeah, he did,” Taylor says, appearing out of nowhere. “And you saying that stuff is a bitch move, Pamela. Just because your husband is screwing the nanny and you don’t want to admit your perfect family isn’t so perfect doesn’t mean you have to rain on other people’s parade. My parents are over—have been for, like, ever—and my dad is happy, so quit your crap.”
I shrink back, hating that Taylor has now garnered everyone’s attention while also loving her even more for standing up for her dad and me.
“Taylor, if your mother knew how you were speaking to me …” Pamela splutters. “You know I’m just looking out for your family. Did you know this woman killed her husband and baby? Do you really think your mom would want you hanging out with someone like that?”
I gasp at her words, tears blurring my vision, and I wish I could do or say something. But instead, I stay stuck in my spot, unable to speak or move.
“What is wrong with you?” Taylor yells. “My family is right here, and Kinsley didn’t kill anyone. It was an accident. And unless you want to say something nice about my dad or Kinsley, you need to keep that shit to yourself.”
“What the hell is going on over here?” Shane barks, making me jump.
“You need to teach your daughter how to speak properly to adults,” Pamela hisses.
“No, you need to learn when to keep your mouth shut,” Taylor argues. “She just accused Kinsley of killing her husband and baby and told her that you and Mom used to hook up and everyone thought you guys were going to get back together.”
“What the fuck, Pam?” Shane hisses, just as an older gentleman walks over and steps between Shane and Pamela.
I think he’s Shane’s boss, the firefighter battalion chief or something.
“I’m so sorry,” the gentleman says, glaring at Pamela. “My daughter has been going through some personal stuff, but that’s no excuse.”
Pamela huffs and stumbles away.
“I love this department, and you know I respect you,” Shane says to the man, whose name I can’t remember to save my life. “But if I ever see that woman at this station or near Kinsley …”
“It won’t happen again,” the man says. Then, he looks at me. “I’m truly sorry. I don’t know all that was said, but I’m sorry. I’m working on getting her the help she needs, but it’s still no excuse.”
“No, it’s not,” Shane says before taking my hand and stomping away from everyone back to his truck with Taylor following behind.
The ride back to their place is quiet, and I consider asking if he can drop me off at home, but I don’t, not wanting to be alone.
When we pull into the driveway, Shane glances at Taylor and says, “Can you give us a moment, please?”
Taylor nods and then leans over and kisses my cheek. “Fuck her,” she says to me, making me choke up and smile at the same time.
Once she’s inside, Shane sighs and turns toward me. When he sees the silent tears sliding down my cheeks, he reaches out and wipes them away with his thumb.
“While I don’t condone the language my daughter used, I agree one hundred percent with what she said.” He tips my face to look at him. “I don’t even know where to start.” He shakes his head.
“There’s nothing to say,” I tell him, leaning into his hand. “She said things out of spite, and you don’t owe me any explanation. We all have pasts, and I wouldn’t judge you for yours, especially since you’ve never judged me for mine.”
“There’s nothing to judge. And the shit she said was …” He sighs in frustration, trying to find the right words.
“Mean? Vindictive?” I finish for him. “Yeah, I know. And before I spent years in therapy, I probably would’ve let her get in my head, but I know that what happened was a tragic accident, and all she did was show me once again how amazing you and Taylor are.”
“We love you,” he says, leaning in and kissing me.
“And I love you both.”