12. Watch YourselfI’m Gonna Make You, Plus I Get First Dibs
12. WATCH YOURSELF OR I’M GONNA MAKE YOU, PLUS I GET FIRST DIBS
Reacting to my declaration of vengeance, Rush and West spoke over each other.
“No,” Rush said at once, but West was already telling me, “Probably best that you stay now anyway.”
While Ryder and Hiroshi watched on, Rush spun on his friend. “You can’t be serious.”
West’s stare was steady and unapologetic. “If she doesn’t escape, then you won’t get in any more trouble with the queen, and our plan for you to become the next heir continues.”
Rush glared at West. “You agreed to help her get out of here, and now you’re saying this?”
“Yes, I am. I’m allowed to have my own mind, aren’t I?” West snapped. “Things have changed. This isn’t what I agreed to. The queen wasn’t supposed to know Elowyn’s out of the dungeon until I got in there to fix things for us. Ivar definitely wasn’t supposed to get there first. It’ll only be a matter of time before she figures out who helped Elowyn. If Ivar’s not looking for them, Finnian might slide without her knowing, maybe even Reed, but you?” West shook his head hard enough to make his silky hair bounce. “She’ll definitely figure it out fast, and then all our planning will be for shit.”
“Plans change.”
“Some plans shouldn’t.” West glanced at me before looking back at Rush, his tone turning imploring. “Bro, we’ve all sacrificed so much to get to this point. So, so fucking much. And now we’re so damn close we’re almost there. The Gladius Probatio will be over tomorrow. You’ll be announced the winner, go through the rest of the trials, end up with a wife, and bam , done. Then all we’ll have to do is keep our cool and wait. You can’t risk all that over some pretty snatch. Any of the drakesses lined up for you’ll do whatever you ask them to, in and out of bed.”
I inhaled sharply and prowled forward. But before I could give West a piece of my mind, Rush stepped between us.
“If you know what’s good for you, asshole, you won’t refer to her like that ever again.” The air surrounding Rush seemed to crackle as he stared down West. “The queen was going to let her die down there. Fucking die . You know that as well as I do. Too many people I’ve cared about have been murdered at that woman’s command. I won’t let El die too.”
West’s eyes flashed his anger. “It’s not a matter of what’s right and wrong, Rush, it hasn’t been for a long-ass time. You acting all high and mighty like we’ve got a choice is a dick move. If she escapes, the queen’ll kill you too. And if she doesn’t, you’ll wish she had.”
“The time for these kinds of concerns was before we broke her out.”
“You told me I’d have time to distort the trail so she wouldn’t know we were involved. I was gonna make it look like Elowyn managed it all on her own, and after her performance in the ring, even if the queen had no explanation for the how, she might’ve believed it. At least we had a chance at it.”
“Then there has to be another way.”
“There isn’t. We’ve been over it a dozen times already. It’s not like I want her to die, Rush. Fuck, you know me better than that.”
I sidestepped Rush and wedged myself between the two men, so close to West I was able to distinguish the flecks of amber in his otherwise chestnut-brown irises. I tipped my head back to better glower at him. “Rush might know you, but I don’t. And I don’t appreciate being referred to as ‘pretty snatch’ even if you’re right and my snatch is plenty pretty. That’s not for you to say.”
“Your snatch is the least of our worries right now,” West replied.
“Hey, man,” Rush growled from behind me, crowding forward. “You’d better watch yourself.”
“Yeah, West,” I said. “Watch yourself, or I’m gonna make you.”
Ryder walked up behind West and wrapped an arm around him, his large hand on the other fae’s chest. “ Chill out, man. There’s no need for insults. We’re all trying to figure out the best next move, remember that. We’re all in this together.”
West turned, stepping out of Ryder’s calming grip. “But we’re not in this together. She’s new here. She doesn’t know how Ramana died in horrific agony because she was trying to forge a better world for all us fae. How many thousands and thousands have suffered and will continue to suffer if Rush doesn’t fucking win the damn trials.”
“Look,” I interjected, “before you get all riled up here, I assure you, I’ve seen enough of the bitch to have a pretty decent idea of what we’re dealing with. I’m sticking around. And I will kill her.”
West scoffed. “Do you know how many have tried before you and failed?”
“No, nor do I need to. I’ll succeed or I’ll be dead, so it’s no skin off your back either way, now is it?”
Hiroshi stepped up next to West, drawing my attention. “Where it concerns the queen, there are far worse ends than death. Given how much she seems to despise you, she’ll make you regret staying.”
Despite my determination to avenge Xeno and Saffron, I swallowed thickly, shoulders unclenching before clenching again. “Either way, I have to stay. I won’t endanger Rush.”
Rush squeezed my shoulder. “El, you’ve gotta go—and now.” He looked over at Ryder. “How long till Roan’s ready to lead her out the other way?”
Before Ryder could answer, I spun, finding myself chest to chest with Rush, the tension between us so different from what it had been just half an hour before in the bathtub. “You saved me from certain death in my match with Selwin. I already owe you one.”
“He’s stuck his neck out for you more than once,” West chimed in from behind me. “Too many times. Rush, you’re the queen’s favorite, but you know that won’t last if you push her too hard.”
“She still controls me and she knows it,” Rush said, his beautiful lips drooping with resignation—another reason to kill the woman.
“And if she starts denying Larissa her treatments to punish you?”
Rush’s eyes hardened into granite, and he seemed no longer able to see me standing right before him. “You get all pissy and you forget all about your promises now?” Rush huffed as loudly as an angry dragon. “She won’t deny her treatments or she loses her control over me.”
“Okay, yeah. But Larissa would still survive if she denied her one or two. Larissa would just suffer more. Are you ready for that? ’Cause you damn well know the queen’s gonna punish you where it hurts most if she doesn’t just outright kill you.”
I spun back around to face West, Ryder, and Hiroshi. “But the queen needs Rush.”
Ryder’s normally light eyes darkened. “She knows one of the three of us would step in if we had to.”
“I don’t understand. If she knows you guys are trying to change things, why would she let you? ”
“She doesn’t know all that we’re trying to do,” Hiroshi said.
“How could she not? She’s despicable, obviously, but she’s smart. She must know once she crowns one of you prince heir you’ll just turn around and kill her.”
Hiroshi scratched at his partially empty sleeve as if the limb growing beneath, with its new, itchy flesh, were causing him discomfort. “Yes, well, Rush isn’t the only one she’s figured out how to control.”
“Meaning?” I asked.
“Meaning we don’t have time to get into all this now.” Rush’s breath rustled my hair, wet and loose. “Elowyn has to get out of here before there’s no chance of it. I’m going to check on Roan. Surely he’s secured the new escape route by now.”
“No,” I said. “I have a better idea.” It wasn’t so much an idea as a fuzzy sketch of one, but all four warriors faced me in anticipation.
“West never refers to my lady parts again unless he wants a one-two of my knees to his balls”—he opened his mouth; I barreled on—“and we pretend Rush apprehended me to keep me from escaping. That way Rush remains the queen’s favorite. West, if I understood you correctly, you can’t change the evidence around my cell now that it’s been found, but could you distort things so it’s plausible that Rush could’ve been following the queen’s orders? And I don’t know how, but do something about Finnian and Reed being there too?”
Ryder and Hiroshi turned toward West. Rush’s silver eyes burned the side of my face, seeking my attention, but I wouldn’t give him the chance to talk me out of it. Not when he’d pay such a steep price for my escape.
West appeared thoughtful for several moments. “I mean, I could try. But no guarantees the queen won’t kill you anyway.”
“That’s where the second part of my plan comes in. Rush takes me to the queen and king together.”
“They’re only together when they have to be,” Hiroshi said.
“What about the Hall of Mirrors? Has the king been going to the parties?”
“Yeah,” Ryder answered. “He’s still pasty and weak from the poisoning, and he spends the entire time sitting on his throne, but he’s there.”
“Excellent.”
“How’s that excellent?” West asked. “In case you hadn’t noticed, the queen’ll have no problem killing you there. It’s not like she doesn’t love a crowd.”
“Yes, but she won’t, not if the king’s there.”
West snorted. “The man’s got the balls of a toddler.”
“Agreed, but that man with the toddler balls happens to be my father, and he seems to want to keep me alive.”
“That’s a sworn secret, El,” Rush admonished. “The king might be soft next to the queen, but he won’t hold back when he finds out we broke our promises.”
“Nope, you’re the only one who swore to keep his secret. As far as I can tell, I owe the man nothing, unless you count having me kidnapped and brought to this shithole in the first place, and I sure as dragonfire don’t.”
“You’re the king’s daughter?” Hiroshi asked, interrupting what I now realized was their stunned silence.
“Yep. Just found out recently myself.”
“Then who’s your mother?” Ryder asked. “Please tell me it’s not the queen…”
“Don’t know who my mom is. The king wants to tell me who she is, but the queen figured that out and hasn’t let me get close to him since.”
“If the queen doesn’t want you to know, you’ll never find out,” West said.
I smiled sadly at how easily this strong drake accepted defeat after a lifetime of abuse by the queen. “I never say never. I’m extremely determined when I wanna be. Hmm, what would happen if I tell everyone I’m the king’s daughter? Would that help? Now that the queen’s whole Zinnia charade’s over, and Braque’s spell that kept me from saying what I wanted is gone, I could tell everyone how not ‘distant’ of a relative of the king’s I really am.”
“That’d make you a target for whatever assassin’s going around killing nobles,” Rush said. “If everyone realizes you’re a royal, it’ll put you head of the line.”
“I thought it was only the queen’s bloodline that mattered.”
“That depends on what the assassin’s goal is.”
“And it’s not any of you?”
“No,” Ryder said. “If it were one of us, we wouldn’t bother with the likes of Lady Aleeza, who wasn’t harming anyone, or at least certainly not as much as the rest of the buzzards roaming the court. We’d go straight for the queen.”
“Why haven’t you, then?”
“Because we can’t,” Rush grunted bitterly. “Not yet, or I’d have gutted her from throat to pelvis ages ago. So long as she’s the only royal of her line connected to the land, we can’t. If she dies, the magic of the mirror world dies with her. We need one of her descendants?—”
“Of which she has none,” Hiroshi injected, “not now that Saturn’s gone.”
“Right,” Rush continued. “So we have to wait for her to crown both heirs to the throne herself. The succession has to be legit or we fear the land might not recognize me as the next king of Embermere.”
“Okay,” I said. “Then shouldn’t it be the next crown princess who takes the power from the queen?”
“No. Male or female doesn’t matter. The kingdom will pass to the ruler with the most power.”
“That’s right,” Hiroshi added. “Fae rule’s all about power. The land recognizes this and will connect with the most powerful crowned fae all on its own.”
“Like, right away?” I asked.
They nodded.
“Then why’s the queen in such a hurry to define new heirs? Isn’t she afraid Rush’ll push her out?”
“No,” West said. “She has a hold over him that’s so strong it makes her more powerful than him. ”
I turned to Rush. “And what’s this hold already?” He was shaking his head. “You have to tell me. How am I supposed to understand what’s happening and what I need to do if you keep me in the dark?”
He stared at me with those moonlit eyes for so long that I believed he’d finally tell me. Then he said, “I carry many secrets I can’t reveal, for others would pay the price. You should escape the darkness of this place while you still can.”
“ No .” I was more decided than before. “Not when it would put you at risk.” I took in the rest of them. “Any of you, even West. We go to the king and queen together, and you pretend to be my captors.”
None of them answered, busy exchanging looks. Mere seconds passed when I snapped, “Well? Are we doing this or what?”
Hiroshi, Ryder, and even West looked to Rush for direction. He waggled his jaw back and forth while a vein in his temple jutted out, but he eventually relented, exhaling loudly.
“Fine. But if we’re doing this, we’re gonna do it my way.”
“No problem, bossy pants,” I said. “Just find a way we can all keep our heads while ending up with the queen’s rolling. Also”—I smiled ferally, baring teeth at the imagery—“when it’s time to kill the bitch, I get first dibs.”
Once again in unison, the four warrior drakes shook their heads.
“No way,” Ryder said. “We’ve been fighting over who’s gonna be the one to kill her for years. One of us is gonna be the one to end the cunt.”
“Okay, fine,” I said, smiling easily. “Have it your way.”
I was lying.
At the first opportunity, I was going to take her down.
I’d end her—and her reign of torment over this land.