Chapter Nineteen

A t first, I think the rustling at the curtains is Licia coming to wake me. But when I crack my eyes open at the sound, they’re still met with darkness. It’s not Licia then. My heart races as my mind conjures all the possibilities of what awaits me at the trellis.

The ghost of Avicii come to exact revenge? Rather than laughing at the thought, a chill runs down my spine. Gryphon would come through the passages, but at this hour? We’re up too high, there aren’t very many other options. I try to calm my breathing in order to hear over my impossibly loud heart trying to escape my chest.

“It’s me.” There’s a whisper followed by a shuffling of feet. I try to place the voice, but a whisper isn’t much to go on. I try to adjust my eyes to the darkness surrounding me, but it's useless. Instead, I ready a pillow to launch as soon as the voice has a body. “Princess, put the pillow down.”

“Thaddeus.” I throw the pillow anyway but my body sings in realization that it’s him.

And he’s come to me. In my bedroom.

I bite my lip in anticipation, knowing where this will lead.

“Don’t do that.” He steps out of the darkness and the moonlight highlights every curve of muscle up his arms and down his thighs. His high cheekbones glimmer along with the glint in his eyes. He waits, though, not coming a step closer until invited.

I beckon him forward, hesitantly at first but when he rewards me with his bright smile, I can’t help but answer him in kind. Moving the covers aside, I make room for him. When I do, he pauses, taking in my thin white nightgown. I watch him watching me. My eyes travel over the way his shirt grips at his chest and arms. Suddenly, I want him to be as he was only hours ago, when he was shirtless and those muscular arms were wrapped around my hips, moving with my own in a dance under the stars.

He leans down, kissing me as he fits his body over my own, kneeling over me as if in prayer and I am his deity. He leans back on his calves, reaching out to trace under my nightgown and pull it up. He traces his thumbs along my curves as he pulls it over my hips and my breasts. I lift my arms as he pulls it over my head and drops it over the side of the bed. His intake of breath at my nakedness brings a smile to my lips, which he kisses in answer. In response, I pull his shirt over his head and instantly, I crave his muscles to flex at my touch the same way they answered the rhythm of the drums.

I trace a fingertip around the curves of muscles, each chiseled muscle responding to my light touch.

“Tell me you want this, Princess.” His chest muscles tense and relax as he waits for my answer.

“Yes,” is all I can manage, watching the way his body responds to mine.

“Yes what?” His palms rub up and down my thighs.

“Yes. I want this. Me. You. Now.” The statement is so bold, so freeing, and I know for certain that it's the truth.

He kisses his way down my jawline and my throat. His kisses turn into nibbles then into bites. I groan at the sweet mixture of desire and pain that moves through me. He takes this as encouragement and continues his journey, sucking each nipple into his mouth and then cupping each breast as his kisses continue their trail down my belly and then continues between my thighs.

He licks at my center, gradually increasing the pressure of his tongue as my hips match his pace. It doesn’t take long. I spare a small thought to Avicii and the partners who came before him, none with the talent this man has. No one knows my body like the man between my legs does. The thought alone brings me closer to release. I can feel the heat rising from my core, filling me, bringing me to the edge. At the last minute I have the mind to throw a pillow over my mouth because the satisfaction leaving my lips would surely rouse Licia. I ride the pleasure until my body is spent.

He only resurfaces once my limbs go limp and my grip on his hair loosens. He rises to his knees and slowly unties his breeches. I wrap my legs around his hips, silently begging for more. My impatience gets the best of me and I move to help but he brushes me off, unceremoniously casting his dagger to the edge of the bed before continuing the slow unwrapping of his length.

I throw the pillow over my head again, but this time in frustration. I hear his low laugh and clothing drop to the floor before he lifts the pillow off my face. “Impatient, are we?”

In answer, I pull him down by his shoulders, wanting his body close to mine. He laughs again and positions himself right over me, pausing just a moment. “Is this what you want?” he asks as he pumps his erection. The way he continuously checks in with me heightens everything. He wants this to be good for me, too. He wants me to be a part of this, too.

I can’t keep my eyes off the motion of his hand and the impressive length resting just above my entrance. “Yes, Thaddeus. This is what I want.” He’s the only thought in my mind as he leans down again and enters me in one long push. I cry out, surprised at the tinge of pain mixed with the delicious feeling of being filled.

I shudder when his whole body presses into mine. Each of his muscles flex and strain as he pauses to allow me to adjust to his size. But his attentiveness only pushes me further toward the edge. His eyes meet mine, his desire burning bright and laid bare. I raise my hips, and that’s all the invitation he needs. He answers—thrusting into me over and over again. His eyes don’t leave mine, focused on my response, watching for my release. His pace quickens, and I can't help but lose myself in him. I stretch my hand out, searching for the pillow, but instead, he clamps his hand over my mouth; the fire in his eyes ignites as I scream my release against his fingers. In response, he pumps once, twice, three times and my walls clench around him, greedy for as much of him as he’ll give me.

He rolls over, out of breath and exhausted. He motions me closer and I snuggle into the crook of his elbow. As we settle, he gently strokes my hair as my thoughts drift.

This is unlike me. Everything about Thaddeus is unlike me, but especially tonight.

And I love it.

Could this be love? Or just a really good time? I suppose it can't be love as most of our interactions have been solely physical, but the connection I have to him, the way I feel so connected to him, makes me think this could be something more if I were able to give it time to propagate.

“Will you be here long?” The question breaks our comfortable silence.

“No. Unfortunately, I have some pressing matters I must attend to back home. A friend is ill, the cure is here in Merula. I’m here as long as it takes me to procure it.” His words weigh heavily on my healer self.

“What sickness is it? What do you need? I’m sure I can obtain it for you.” Between my status as a princess and Thaliya’s knowledge of the lands, I’m sure we can locate whatever he needs in no time.

“I promised discretion. But if I wear out my resources, I’ll let you know. Thank you, it means the world that you want to help.”

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