Chapter Nineteen
Eleanor couldn’t even begin to comprehend her own actions and yet had absolutely no desire to stop them. She’d never in her life behaved with such passion or impulsivity. But she found herself embracing it with a recklessness that shocked her.
He inspired something in her. A boldness.
A curiosity. A sense that…she’d been missing a whole gorgeous landscape of experiences.
She was tired of lowering her gaze so as not to yearn for what she’d been told she could not have.
She was no longer willing to turn away from what she desired for herself.
And right now, there was just so much she wanted to experience. To know. To feel.
The way his large, warm hand squeezed the back of her neck before shoving into her hair to grasp the back of her head.
The way his bent leg braced against her side. And how the solid breadth of his chest and shoulders accepted her weight as she leaned into him—desperate to be as close as possible.
She enjoyed the tingling sweep of his hand up and down her spine, making her arch with sensations. But most of all, it was the brush of his velvet lips and the delicious thrust of his tongue and the pant of his heated breath…
As his lips sipped and teased and the edge of his teeth scraped delicately over her lips, she sighed and curled her fingertips into the muscle of his thigh.
With a rich gravelly sound, he shifted her against him, tipping her head back and cradling her in the bend of his arm. Then, he smoothed his other hand possessively over the curve of her hip, then farther…down her thigh until he paused at the bend of her knee.
He flicked his tongue hotly against hers and nipped at her mouth, making her breathless before he lifted his head. His breath bathed her cheek. “What do you want of me, Eleanor?”
Her name sounded almost sultry in his roughened murmur. An arc of tingling sensation spread from the back of her skull, through her trembling belly, to the aching flesh between her legs.
She opened her eyes just enough to meet his heavy-lidded stare. His handsome features were formed into an expression more earnest than she’d ever seen as he awaited her response.
What did she want? The question echoed in her mind.
She had no words for the longing inside her.
An awkwardness filtered through her awareness.
Her throat tensed. But when she would have tried to shift out of his embrace, his grip on her tightened.
The fingers in her hair curled into a gentle fist as he hooked his hand behind her knee and started to draw her leg up his thigh.
“What do you want?” he asked again, his voice deeper, harsher, and more insistent.
Eleanor lifted her chin and swept her tongue across her lips to wet them before returning the question, “What do you want?”
Something wicked and fierce flashed in his eyes and his brows tugged inward for a second. But then…his gaze softened as it slid gently over her features and his mouth tilted into a dangerous smile.
“I want…” he began in a whisper before his voice faded into a ragged sigh. He lowered his head to press a warm kiss to the hollow between her ear and the corner of her jaw.
She gasped a silent breath as sparks of pleasure spread from the spot.
“I want to feel the softness of your skin beneath my hand,” he continued roughly.
Gathering her skirts as he spoke, he dragged the material up her legs in a silken caress.
She sighed and closed her eyes.
“I want to kiss your racing pulse and taste your rising excitement.”
He trailed his lips down the side of her throat where her heartbeat sped just beneath her skin.
Eleanor dropped her head back, exposing more of herself to his kiss. Her hand fisted in the collar of his coat. If she could have found her words, this is what she’d have said she wanted. Sensations. Heat. The thrill of his focused attention. This wild, uncertain pleasure.
And then his hand was on her bare thigh, curved around the back, his thumb brushing gently against her skin. His breath was warm as he slid his lips back up to her ear.
“But, sweetheart,” he whispered roughly, “I don’t want any of it if there is a possibility you’ll regret this.”
He flicked his tongue against her sensitive earlobe then lifted his head.
She could feel him looking at her and reluctantly opened her eyes again.
The masculine beauty of his features was accentuated by the tension he couldn’t conceal.
His jaw muscles were bunched, his brow slightly furrowed, and his stare pierced her soul.
But his lips…parted with his swift breath, firmly arched but so wonderfully soft to the touch. She lifted her hand to brush the tips of her fingers over their intriguing shape. Her entire body tingled in response to the satiny warmth.
“Why do you make me feel like this?” The question slid quietly from her lips before she could stop it. Embarrassment began to sweep through her, but he tightened his grip on her thigh and lowered his chin.
Flicking her focus to his eyes, she saw the intensity sparking in their depths. Her fingers slid to the hard line of his jaw. She reveled in the slightly roughened texture.
“It is not so mysterious,” he answered, a smile subtle in his thickened voice. “Desire is a natural human experience.”
“I’ve never known it before,” she confessed.
He cleared his throat and his voice deepened. “Do you enjoy it?” His hand squeezed her thigh again. “Do you want more?”
Her body tightened. Everything inside her swirled with excitement and anticipation. She looked into his eyes. “I shouldn’t.”
“Why not?”
“It’s dangerous.”
“Not if we’re careful,” he assured. “I know how to be careful.”
Eleanor wanted to believe him—trust him.
“Explore your desire with me,” he murmured.
She wanted to—oh lord how she wanted to!
She curled her hand around the side of his warm throat and leaned forward to press her mouth to the underside of his jaw. He tensed and his breath stuttered.
“Tell me how we can be careful,” she whispered, before she flicked her tongue against his earlobe as he’d done to her. Then she pressed another kiss along the pulse in his neck.
“I can touch you,” he said in a soft grunt. “Bring you pleasure. A release of the tension building inside you.”
Somehow, the tension he mentioned built exponentially in reaction to his reply.
“How?”
With a low growl, he pulled her head back by the hand buried in her hair and hungrily claimed her mouth in a deep, ravening kiss. Plunging his tongue into the depths. Swallowing her moan.
“Like this,” he finally muttered against her lips before he physically lifted her from his lap and turned her around until her back was fully cradled against his chest. Her head rested against his shoulder and his legs were bent and braced around her.
One of his hands now splayed heavy and warm over her belly and the other was still on her thigh, with her skirt lifted nearly to her hips and her legs bared.
She felt unbelievably vulnerable. Exposed. Utterly wicked.
A deep breath lifted her chest as she rolled her spine and shifted her legs.
“Easy, sweetheart,” he whispered at her ear, the sound both soothing and arousing. “I’m just going to touch you. Understand you can stop me at any time. I hold you, but you are in control of this experience.”
The velvet of his voice at her ear, his warm breath bathing her neck, the pressure of his palm over her trembling belly, and his fingers lightly caressing her outer thigh…nearly unraveled her. She felt both languid and taut. Her body melted against him while her muscles tensed with anticipation.
With a low sound, he smoothed his hand up to curve around her ribcage as he braced his forearm beneath her breasts. His mouth pressed hotly to the side of her throat. “Tell me you understand,” he murmured. “That you want this. If you do not, I swear I’ll leave you untouched.”
Reacting instinctively to the suggestion that he might leave her like this, Eleanor arched and lifted one hand to curl around the back of his neck, trying to secure herself more firmly to him.
“Don’t leave me.” Her voice was fierce and breathless. “I understand. I want this. So badly.”
“Thank God,” he groaned.
For some reason, the gravelly depth of his relief tickled her humor and she gave a soft laugh as her fingers threaded into the hair at his nape.
“You find my desperation amusing?” he growled in mock affront before scraping the edge of his teeth along the side of her neck, up to her ear where he nipped at the sensitive shell.
Shivers coursed through Eleanor, making her gasp at the intensity of such a delicate sensation. Seeming to enjoy her reaction he nipped at the curved edge of her ear again before tugging at her earlobe with his teeth.
Her entire body erupted in shivers of pleasure.
Some skating over her skin, lifting goosebumps, others going deep through the core of her to the warm, heavily aching flesh between her thighs.
Her nipples peaked against the material of her gown and she rolled her hips.
Tightening her grip at his nape, she dropped her other hand to grasp his bracing thigh.
“So delicate, yet fierce,” he whispered. “What else can I do to cause such a lovely response?”
The arm banded beneath her breasts shifted as he moved his warm, weighted hand to cover her breast. The delicious pressure was surprising. She was modestly endowed and his hand fully encompassed the soft mound. With a gentle squeeze he made her ache and she arched into his hand.
Giving a low sound of appreciation, he adjusted his touch to brush his thumb over the sensitive peak. Eleanor gasped and turned her head toward him to find his mouth there waiting. Her lips sought his eagerly, her tongue slipping past his teeth with a silent, desperate hunger.
He opened to her and lowered his head to kiss her more fully as her own head dropped back.
It was a hot kiss. A wet, deep, and passionate kiss.
As he teased her nipple with his dancing fingers and the subtle edge of his blunt nails, the sensations he aroused spiraled through her body.
Twisting silken tendrils through her core with a cascade of molten heat that settled in her sex.
Restless, she shifted her legs and her movements caused his hand to slide along her inner thigh. She instantly gasped and stilled, her body going taut with a rush of anticipation.
“Are you ready to feel me here?” he asked against her lips, his fingers pressing briefly into her soft flesh.
Eleanor held her breath.
His thumb circled over her nipple and his tongue teased at her lips. But he didn’t slide his hand any higher.
She wanted to beg him to touch her there—where so much heat and wetness had gathered. But words were impossible. Even if she could figure out the right thing to say—the right words to use—to get what she wanted, it would get stuck in her panting throat.
But she needed it. Craved it.