Chapter 12
GRAYSON
The moment I wake up, I’m grinning. It’s the loose, giddy type that a kid would flash at the man pretending to be Santa at the mall. That’s what Jill reduces me to. A child eager to beg a bearded stranger for a Christmas gift. Christ help us both.
Wetting my dry lips, I stretch out my arm and wiggle my fingers, trying to reach where she’s rolled away to. It would have been ideal to have her pressed against my body the moment I peel my eyes open, but there’s no mistaking the cold that’s seeping into my skin.
I dig my palm into my eyes before forcing them open and blinking to adjust to the dark.
If it weren’t for the light slipping through the bottom of the curtains, I’d assume it was still night.
That’s not the case, though. Which makes my curiosity turn to stomach-flipping worry when I stare at the very empty spot beside me.
The sheets are still warm when I rub my hand over where I should have found Jill. She hasn’t been gone for long, but it still grates on me that she’s left at all. It could have been an emergency, only if it were, I’m pretty confident that she would have woken me before disappearing.
She didn’t.
It bothers me more than it should. I know she doesn’t owe me anything, not even after what happened last night. As amazing as it was to have her like that . . . beneath me and then later, with her hands on the headboard and me rocking into her from behind—
Fuck. Enough, Grayson.
Sex doesn’t grant me unrestricted access to her life. Point blank period.
The reminder doesn’t do any good. I push myself up and stretch my tense arms above my head and across my chest. This is uncharted territory. Do I have the right to go searching for her, or is that stepping over the line? Would it be an easily forgivable offense if I risked it, anyway?
Her phone isn’t on the nightstand where I had plugged it in after she fell asleep last night.
I’d sent a text to her sister before crawling into bed, not wanting her to spend the entire night before her wedding worrying about her when she was well taken care of.
The bride and groom were booked into separate rooms from what I’d heard at dinner, so I wouldn’t have been surprised if her sister spent her time alone pacing a hole in the floor.
There wasn’t much time to get a feel for Jill’s family at dinner before we left and came back to our room, but from what I’ve gathered, it’s clear Kate cares heavily about her.
Regardless of her obsession with her soon-to-be husband’s family, she has a soft spot for Jill and clearly misses her.
Maybe this wedding will pull them back over the gap that’s grown in their relationship.
I’m out of bed in a blink. I avoid my contacts and put my glasses on before grabbing a pair of jeans from my bag and yanking them on, not bothering with underwear.
The immediate scratch on my balls has me second-guessing that decision for the slimmest moment before I shrug a shirt on and shove a room key into my pocket.
If something is wrong, I refuse to have learn about it after the fact because I was sitting here twiddling my thumbs, daydreaming like a teenager. I want to be with her, helping in any way I can.
The wait for the elevator feels like it takes ages.
I tap my toe on the hall carpet and watch as the numbers climb one by one.
By the time it dings and the doors glide open, I’m too antsy.
I jam my finger into the lobby button and scrub a hand through my hair.
It’s rarely unkept like this. Some call me anal, but I just have certain standards that I like to keep for myself.
It’s why I work out as often as I do and keep a monthly appointment at my favourite barber. Skin care isn’t only for women, either, which is a perception that’s always frustrated me.
Nipping at my cheek, I stare at the number two on the screen beside the door and wonder if Jill appreciates all the effort I put into my appearance.
And if she does, would she ever tell me?
Not that I need to hear anything about that.
It would just be nice to know that she finds me even half as attractive as I find her.
The doors part, and I nearly jump free of the elevator.
Unsurprisingly, the lobby is empty besides the front desk clerk clicking away on the keyboard in front of her.
There’s a sharp scent of fresh coffee trailing over from the dining room and a low hum of conversation clinging to it.
I twist in the direction of the noise but pause with one foot in front of me.
“This isn’t funny, Jill. I took time off for this, and I’ve just gotten a killer promotion.
It made me look bad to request the days to be here, but I did it anyway because I thought you wanted me here.
Now, if you’re done playing with that clean-cut robot you’ve ditched upstairs, I’d really like to take this conversation to my room so we can be alone.
We both know we shouldn’t have broken up.
What we had was good, baby. Don’t tell me you don’t miss it. Miss me.”
Every muscle in my body coils as I turn on my heels and stare down the opposite hall. Nobody’s there, but I know who that voice belongs to. James is lingering somewhere like a bad smell, and he’s with her. My Jill.
“Let it go, James. A reconnection isn’t happening here or anywhere. There’s no future with us. I’m sorry you wasted a trip—”
I’m taking wide steps forward, following the shaky sound of Jill’s voice.
I can see a sandal-clad foot sticking out from a small alcove in the hallway and move faster, my chest tight.
The first thing I see is James’s twisted expression as he looks down at her, forcing her into the place against his body.
Then—the hand on her elbow, holding tight.
“Stop this. Be honest. Let me kiss you and remind you of what we had, Jill. I promise you’ll realize what a mistake you’re making.”
“I’d recommend you take your hand off of her and step back,” I growl, dropping a hand to James’s tight shoulder.
He whirls on me, releasing Jill too quickly for her to regain her balance. She stumbles back, and her back makes contact with the wall, making her wince. Her eyes fly to mine and stay there, relief blazing bright inside of them.
I try to dial back my anger. Punching this guy isn’t going to be helpful to either of us, especially not today. But I want to. More than that, I want to break every bone in his hand so that he’ll never forget the repercussions of touching her.
Instead, I roll my jaw and shift to stand in front of Jill.
I reach back with a semi-formed fist, just needing to touch her.
My rage softens when she takes my hand in hers and slowly uncurls my fingers.
James is silent as he stares at me, unable to see her now.
The annoyance in his expression doesn’t disappear, but he’s no longer curling his lip at me like a rabid dog who just lost his favourite toy.
“Jill doesn’t need you to fight her battles for her, Greg.”
I suck my teeth and let that petty dig run off my back. “She can speak for herself. You didn’t need to put your hands on her to get a point across.”
“Come on, man. We all know this is just a ploy. You don’t have to convince me,” he pushes, not letting it go.
Jill slips her fingers through mine and clutches them tight. I give a responding squeeze and suck in a calming breath. This is not the situation I wanted us to be in this morning.
“To be blunt, James, I don’t give a flying fuck if you believe it or not.
I’m crazy about this woman, and my feelings are the furthest thing from a ploy.
I’ve been wanting Jill for years, and now that I have her, I’m not letting her go.
Especially not to you, a man who I hadn’t so much as heard a whisper about before a week ago. ”
His expression tightens, frustration and anger mixing to create something cruel that has me bristling.
He clears his throat and crosses his arms, attempting to appear bigger, maybe.
It doesn’t work. I’ve got at least three inches on him and a solid twenty pounds.
But he can try and intimidate me. It’ll be fun to watch him fail.
“I doubt you know even half the things about her that I do,” he snarks.
I almost laugh. “Try me.”
“Can we not make this some petty competition, James? I need to go up and get ready for my sister’s wedding, in case you forgot,” Jill says, sighing heavily.
I hold still while she comes to stand beside me and rests her opposite hand on my bicep, holding me.
It’s all I can do not to sweep her into my arms and kiss her against the vending machine, James be damned.
After last night, kissing her until our mouths are puffy and sore is the only thing I want to spend our morning doing.
“If you’re nervous that he’s going to fail, then just admit that this is all some stupid joke, Jill. We can put an end to it now.”
Her annoyance is obvious, but as much as I’d like to simply walk away with her without playing into his hand, I can’t get myself to move.
It’s the dark, obsessive part of my mind that has me rooting myself into the carpet and clearing my throat.
I need to put an end to this before I can do anything else.
Pinning James beneath my sharp gaze, I say, “I doubt you even know half of these things yourself, but if you want me to prove how well I know her, then I’ll do that.
And once I’m finished, you’re going to go back to your room, pack your things, and leave without so much as contemplating attending a wedding that you are no longer invited to attend. Is that clear?”
His responding smile is grimaced, forced as he nods. Jill brings her hand higher up my arm, and yeah, I might flex a bit. The tensing of her fingers is exactly what I wanted and almost needed right now.
“She doesn’t have a favourite colour, but if she had to choose just one, it would be a soft, pastel blue because it looks the best with her skin tone.
If you give her the choice of movie, she’ll always choose a horror film, specifically IT, because for some reason I don’t understand, she likes clowns and, despite having seen it a million times, doesn’t get sick of it.
She takes her coffee with three sugars and a flavoured creamer.
It doesn’t matter which flavour, as long as it’s sweet enough to make your teeth ache.
Her friends are the most important people to her, and she loves kids, babies especially.
They love her right back. I think everyone who meets her does because she doesn’t hide how much she adores those in her life.
They—we—can feel it with every twinkle of laughter and wide grin, and that means more than she knows.
“If you want to go toe to toe here, I’ll win, James.
I’ve got a vault in my mind with her name on it, and if you give me the time, I’ll spend days, maybe even weeks, listing every single thing I’ve ever noticed about her.
So, you can doubt this all you want. It doesn’t mean anything to me, because I know how I feel and what I’m willing to do to prove myself to her every single day for the rest of my life.
That’s something I know you wouldn’t do. Are we done here now?”
It’s pin-drop silent when I finish.
I wait for him to reply, but when his face flushes a deep, ugly shade of red, I know he won’t. There isn’t anything for him to say that will matter. Not to him, or me, or the woman beside me, and that says more than enough. It doesn’t surprise me in the slightest to see him walk away.
His footsteps carry down the hallway as he stalks to wherever his room is. I wait for even a tickle of guilt to hit me for being so pointed with him, but nothing comes. Instead, all I feel is a blistering desire to kiss Jill and ensure that she knows everything I just said was the truth.
She beats me to it.
A hand presses to my face and turns me toward her. I only get a brief glance at her wide eyes and pink cheeks before she’s pressing onto her toes and yanking me down for a kiss.
The taste of her lips makes everything else fade to nothing, and I’m content to stay lost in this gap in reality for the rest of eternity.