Chapter Twenty-One Grace
Chapter Twenty-One
Grace
I sit on the beach, staring out at the horizon as the waves lap gently at the shore. The sun is starting to set, painting the sky in hues of pink and orange, but I barely notice. My mind is too tangled with everything that’s happened—the lies, the fake engagement, Logan’s confession, and now this hollow feeling in my chest.
I hear footsteps behind me, and when I glance over my shoulder, I see Emily approaching, her face soft with concern. I wipe away the tears that have been threatening to fall for the past hour and try to compose myself, but it’s no use. Emily has always been able to see through me.
She settles down beside me on the sand without saying a word at first, just sitting quietly as we watch the ocean together. After a long silence, she speaks.
“I talked to Logan,” she says softly, her eyes fixed on the horizon. “He’s… smitten with you, Grace. Guilt-ridden. He doesn’t know how to fix things, but he wants to. He’s willing to do whatever it takes. Will you give him another chance?”
I look down at my hands, my fingers playing with the edge of my shirt. “I don’t know, Em. I don’t know if I can.”
Emily turns to me, her brow furrowed in sympathy. “Why not; you care about him, don’t you?”
I hesitate, the weight of everything pressing down on me. “I do,” I admit, my voice barely above a whisper. “It’s not that simple. It’s not just about caring for him.”
Emily tilts her head, waiting for me to continue. The soft encouragement in her expression makes it easier for me to open up.
“I was desperate,” I say, my voice trembling slightly. “I’ve had feelings for Logan for so long. He — he wanted to fake an engagement, and I was there. It was convenient. I jumped at the chance to be close to him. Even if it wasn’t real, I thought… I thought maybe I could handle it. Maybe it was better than nothing.”
Emily’s eyes widen in surprise, but she remains silent, letting me speak.
“I agreed to it because I wanted him,” I confess, my heart pounding. “I was so desperate to have him in any capacity, even if it meant pretending. Now… now the goalposts have shifted. We’re not just pretending anymore. At least, I’m not. I don’t know if Logan feels the same way. Even if he does, how do I know it’s real and not just a result of this mess we’ve created?”
Tears prick at my eyes, and I wipe them away quickly, feeling the vulnerability tighten my chest. “I’m so sorry, Emily. I didn’t mean for this to get out of hand. I never wanted to lie to you, or to Joseph, or to my family. I thought I could control it, but now… now everything’s a disaster.”
Emily’s expression softens, and she reaches out, placing a gentle hand on my arm. “Grace, it’s okay. I understand. You were trying to protect yourself, and honestly, you didn’t owe anyone an explanation for how you were feeling. I’m glad you’re telling me now. You’ve been carrying all of this on your own, and you didn’t need to.”
I blink, surprised by how easily she forgives me. “You’re not angry?”
Emily shakes her head. “No, I’m not angry. Disappointed that you didn’t feel like you could talk to me, maybe. Not angry. I can see how complicated this has been for you.”
I let out a shaky breath, feeling some of the weight lift off my chest. “I don’t know what to do, Em. Logan says he has feelings for me, but how can I believe him? This started out as a lie. How can I trust that anything between us is real?”
Emily gives me a small smile. “Because people change, Grace. Feelings change. What started out one way doesn’t have to stay that way forever. If Logan says he cares about you, I think you should give him the chance to prove it. You’ve been holding yourself back out of fear, but maybe it’s time to stop.”
I bite my lip, trying to process her words. “But what if I get hurt again? What if this is just… convenient for him?”
Emily squeezes my arm gently. “You have to ask yourself if it’s worth the risk. I’ve seen the way Logan looks at you, Grace. It’s not just convenience. I’ve seen the way you look at him. You’re both in this deeper than you realize.”
I take a deep breath, my heart aching with the uncertainty. “I don’t know how to face my family. They think I’m finally settling down, that I’ve found someone… but it was all based on a lie.”
Emily nods, understanding. “I can’t promise your family won’t be upset. They probably will be. If you love Logan, and if he loves you, that’s worth more than any lie or misunderstanding. The truth will hurt, but it’s better than living with something false.”
I close my eyes, the tears finally slipping down my cheeks. “I’m just scared, Emily. I don’t know if I can forgive him for what he did to Samantha, and I don’t know if I can forgive myself for starting this whole thing in the first place.”
Emily leans in, her voice gentle but firm. “Follow your heart, Grace. If you love him, if you think he’s worth fighting for, then try to forgive him. You’ve both made mistakes, but you deserve to be happy. Don’t let fear be the thing that holds you back.”
I wipe at my eyes, looking out at the ocean as the waves crash against the shore. Emily’s words sink in, and I realize she’s right. I’ve been letting fear control me, letting it stop me from taking a chance on something real.
I’m not sure I’m ready to let go of that fear just yet. Not entirely.
“I’ll think about it,” I whisper, my voice hoarse.
Emily smiles softly. “That’s all you need to do for now.”
I take a deep breath and pull out my phone, my fingers trembling as I scroll to Logan’s name. It’s time to talk, time to sort through this mess and figure out where we stand. The conversation with Emily has left me feeling lighter, but there’s still a storm of uncertainty swirling inside me. I press the call button, holding my breath as the phone rings. One ring. Two. Three.
Then it goes to voicemail.
Of course. Typical Logan.
I sigh, my frustration rising again. It’s not like I was expecting everything to be magically fixed by one phone call, but still… I needed to hear his voice, needed to know that he was as anxious to talk as I was. Instead, all I’m left with is the dull, robotic voice telling me to leave a message.
I don’t. I hang up and drop my phone into the sand beside me, letting out a long, shaky breath.
Emily watches me patiently, her face calm, but I can tell she’s reading every flicker of emotion in my expression. “Don’t let it get to you,” she says softly, her voice soothing. “He’s probably just dealing with something. Maybe he’s nervous.”
“Nervous about what?” I snap, my irritation bubbling up. “He’s the one who created this whole mess, Em. He’s the one who’s kept everything so complicated. Now I’m supposed to call him and spill my heart, and he’s too busy or whatever to pick up the phone?”
Emily doesn’t respond right away, just gives me a look that’s so patient, so kind, it makes me feel even more ridiculous. “Take a minute,” she says, gesturing to the waves in front of us. “Sit here, cool off. This isn’t something you should rush into when you’re this upset.”
I sit back down, my legs folding under me as I stare out at the ocean. The waves crash rhythmically, the sound usually calming, but right now, it does little to soothe the frustration churning inside me.
Emily shifts next to me, pulling her knees to her chest as she gazes out at the water. “You know, Logan dealt with Samantha. Joseph and I talked to him after lunch. She’s leaving tomorrow. She’s not coming to the wedding.”
I glance at her, surprised. “Wait, what?”
She nods, her expression serious. “He confronted her. Told her that she’s not welcome here anymore and that she has to leave before the wedding. Joseph and I are making sure she follows through. Samantha’s out of the picture.”
I blink, absorbing the news. I should feel relieved—this is what I wanted, after all—but instead, I feel a mix of emotions. Anger, frustration, confusion. “Why didn’t he just do that in the first place?” I ask, my voice harsher than I intend. “Why did he let her hang around for so long, stirring up all this drama? He could’ve kicked her out the moment she showed up.”
Emily smiles softly, giving me a knowing look. “Maybe he was afraid.”
I frown, shaking my head. “Afraid of what? She’s been nothing but trouble. It’s not like he owes her anything.”
Emily leans back on her hands, her gaze still on the waves. “It’s not that simple, Grace. I think he was afraid of facing his past. Of confronting what he did, of admitting how messed up their relationship was. Maybe… maybe he was afraid of how it would affect you.”
I fall silent, Emily’s words sinking in. I hadn’t considered that. That Logan might have been holding back out of fear, not just to protect himself, but to protect me. It hits me, then, how much he must have been struggling with all of this—the guilt, the mess with Samantha, and whatever he’s been feeling about us. Maybe I wasn’t the only one afraid.
“You think he’s been scared this whole time?” I ask, my voice quieter now, softer.
Emily nods. “I do. Not just of Samantha. I think he’s been scared of losing you, Grace. Scared of telling you how he feels and not knowing if you’d feel the same way.”
I look down at my hands, twisting my fingers together as I process everything. “I’ve been scared too,” I admit, my voice barely above a whisper. “I was so afraid of losing him, of losing this… whatever it is between us, that I jumped into this fake engagement without thinking about the consequences.”
Emily places a hand on my arm, her touch warm and comforting. “You’re not alone in that, Grace. Relationships are messy, and love is even messier. It’s clear that Logan cares about you. He’s making an effort. He’s just as scared as you are, but maybe that’s a good thing.”
I give her a small, unsure smile. “Maybe.”
We sit in silence for a moment, watching the waves. The weight of my confession hangs between us, but for the first time in days, I don’t feel completely alone in it. Emily understands. She always has.
Finally, I speak again, my voice softer now. “I just… I don’t know what to do, Em. How do I move forward? How do I trust that this can work?”
Emily looks at me thoughtfully, her eyes kind but filled with understanding. “I think you start by taking a breath. Right now, everything feels heavy, but it won’t always. You don’t have to make a decision this second, Grace.”
I nod, my heart still racing, unsure how to move past the weight of it all. I close my eyes, frustration bubbling up. I can’t handle this uncertainty. I need answers, and he’s nowhere to be found.
Emily places a gentle hand on my shoulder. “Give it time. He’ll call back.”
I hope she’s right.