8. Donny
8
Donny
I should turn around. But the thought of seeing Carmen pulls me forward like a magnet.
As I step out of my building, I’m nearly blinded by camera flashes. Paparazzi swarm around me, their voices a clamor of shouted questions.
“Donny! How does it feel to be engaged?”
“When’s the wedding, Donny?”
“How will your engagement affect the band dynamics on tour?”
I plaster on a smile, trying to make my way to the waiting SUV. “No comment, folks. Just heading out for the day.”
A reporter manages to shove a phone in my face, showing me a social media post. It’s a blurry photo of Carmen and me at the restaurant, her hand clearly sporting the ring.
RAISING HAVOC'S DRUMMER CAUGHT IN SECRET ENGAGEMENT!
Fuck! I finally reach my SUV and climb in, my mind racing.
I need to see Carmen. It’s not the paparazzi or my career that has my heart racing—it’s her. The thought of this all crashing down and hurting her makes my chest tight. I’ve been in the spotlight before, but this time it's different. We need to get ahead of this, and fast.
As my driver pulls up, I see another swarm of paparazzi crowding the entrance to Carmen’s building, cameras at the ready. I narrow my eyes. Our little charade has stirred up quite the hornet’s nest.
What was supposed to be a private favor has spiraled into something far bigger. It was easy when it was just us pretending around my parents—just a harmless act for a few days. But now that the rest of the world caught sight of us together, it’s become a little more tricky than I would’ve liked.
No one has noticed me just yet, so I hurriedly cut around the back alley and head for a large metal door that I’m hoping leads somewhere inside the complex. I pause with my hand on the doorknob, my brows furrowed, then shake my head and push my way through the door. There’s chatter among the people inside, and it all dies down when I enter the room.
I glance around, noting the large stove and plethora of workers gawking at me.
Must’ve gone through the wrong door.
There’s a small diner located on the other half of the complex, so I guess it isn’t so surprising that’s where I ended up. Before everyone can make a big deal, I give them a nervous smile and hurry out the back door with a heavy sigh.
Now's my chance to turn back and forget about my agenda for today.
I shake my head and frown.
No, I’m sticking to the plan. I’m going to walk through the complex, up to Carmen’s apartment, and do something for her as a thank you. She didn’t need to help me, yet she did.
I also need to break the news to her.
Instead of listening to the voice inside of my head, I simply square my shoulders and eye the alleyway until I find another metal door that seems to be more promising. This time I find myself stepping into an empty hallway that leads into a brightly lit area and I casually follow that light. When I poke my head around the corner, there’s an older man sitting behind a desk with a newspaper held up and he startles when his eyes find mine.
“Oh, I apologize, sir,” he says with a soft chuckle. “I didn’t hear you come in. That damn bell chooses when it works most of the time.”
I flash him a grin. “No worries. Mind keeping this our little secret?”
I look toward the entrance door, which is crowded with more reporters and paparazzi, then back at the older gentleman. “Do me a favor, act like you never saw me?”
His eyes widen with recognition, a conspiratorial smile spreading across his face. “Of course, of course. Your secret’s safe with me.”
“Thank you, and you have a good day,” I say over my shoulder as I make my way across the marble floors and toward the elevators.
My heart races as the elevator climbs to Carmen’s floor. This conversation won’t be easy, but it’s necessary.
I know I’m about to drop a bombshell on her, and I can already imagine her reaction. This isn’t just about thanking her for going along with the charade anymore. I just hope she’ll let me in, let us face this together.
Before I can scare myself away, I knock lightly on the door and hold my breath for sounds of shuffling around inside. When I don’t hear anything, I frown and try knocking a little louder. My eyebrows jump when I hear a few muttered curses, then the lock on the door is clicking and it’s being pulled open.
The door swings open, and I’m not prepared for the sight that greets me. Carmen, our always-put-together manager, looks like she’s been hit by a truck. Her hair’s a wild mess, eyes bloodshot and squinting against the light. The scent of stale alcohol clings to her, and I can’t help but smirk.
“Rough night, Sunshine?”
The sight of her, messy and vulnerable, stirs something inside me. I like this softer side of her. I like seeing the cracks in her armor.
Carmen groans, rubbing her temples. “Mia, Julia, Mallory... they dragged me out. I didn’t stand a chance. One drink led to another, and now... well, here I am.”
“The girls?”
“They’re quite... persuasive, she mumbles.”
Interesting. Carmen bonding with the band’s partners? That’s new.
“What do you want?” she mutters, voice rough with sleep and probably a hangover.
“Is that how you welcome the love of your life?” I tease, trying to keep my voice light, but even I hear the edge in it.
Her eyes snap open, a glare replacing the bleary confusion. “What the hell are you doing here?”
“Can’t a guy check on his fake fiancée after a wild night out?”
She groans. “How did you—never mind. It doesn’t matter. You can leave now.”
I pull out my phone, my heart pounding as I turn the screen toward her. The headline flashes across the screen like a neon sign.
“ LOVE BEHIND THE SCENES: RAISING HAVOC'S DRUMMER ENGAGED TO BAND MANAGER!! ”
Carmen’s eyes narrow as she stares at the screen, and I brace myself for her reaction. The silence stretches, thick and suffocating, before she finally snatches the phone from my hand.
Carmen’s eyes widen, all traces of hangover vanishing. “What the hell?”
“Our little secret’s out, Sunshine,” I say, trying to keep my tone light despite the gravity of the situation. “Seems like someone caught us at the restaurant.”
She scrolls through the article, her face paling with each swipe. “This... this is a disaster. Donny, what are we going to do?”
Carmen’s voice wavers, and for the first time, I see the cracks. The always-in-control, no-nonsense Carmen is unraveling in front of me. And it hits me hard—I’ve put her in this position. It was never supposed to get this far.
Carmen leans against the doorframe, suddenly looking exhausted again. “I need coffee for this conversation. Lots of it. God, my family will see this too. This is a nightmare .”
Her robe hangs loosely on her, offering a glimpse of the tiny pajamas beneath, and my body reacts instantly. As if sensing my dirty thoughts, she pulls the robe tighter around herself, her gaze locking with mine, forcing my attention to her beautiful face.
It’s not just her looks—it’s the tension crackling between us. The way she tightens the robe, like she knows exactly how hard I’m trying to keep it together. There's a pull between us, something I haven’t felt in a long time.
I’m screwed.
“I’ve got a feeling you didn’t eat,” I say, studying her face, and a chuckle slips from my throat. “If I didn’t know any better, I’d say our manager may have even had some fun last night.”
She narrows her eyes at me and points a finger. “Stop, Drummer Boy.”
My eyebrows quirk at the nickname and I keep my mouth shut, aside from the smirk lifting at one corner of it. “Which is even more of a reason to go for some breakfast. I hear there’s a great place next door.”
She runs a hand through her messy hair, sighing heavily. “This is such a mess. I need to think, to figure out how to handle this.” Her eyes meet mine, a mix of frustration and resignation in them. “I suppose you have some ideas?”
I lean against the doorframe, studying her. “The whole world thinks we’re engaged, Sunshine. Whatever happens next, we will face this together.”
She winces, whether from my words or her headache, I’m not sure. “Oh, God. Mia wouldn’t shut up about it last night.”
“Oh? Do tell.”
Carmen rolls her eyes. “Later. Much, much later. When my head isn’t trying to split open.”
We’ve spent the last few days being cozier with each other. It’s nice to have that harsh tone back.
“Besides, I want to thank you properly for helping me, and there’s no time like the present.”
“No, absolutely not,”she glares.
I arch a brow and lean forward. “Come on, Sunshine,” I say sweetly, “you don’t even know what I’ve got planned.”
She rolls her eyes and huffs in annoyance. “Still, no.”
“We have to come up with a good story, you know? This is everywhere.”
That gets her attention, her eyes snapping to mine, and she narrows them. “If you weren’t reckless when we went out, there wouldn’t be a need for a story.” She shakes her head and groans. “How the hell are we supposed to split right after I met your parents?”
She’s got a point there. “More of a reason to spend a day with me.”
“You are insufferable,” she mutters. “I guess if you’re already here, and refusing to leave, you may as well come in.”
With that, she pulls the door open and waves me inside. “Well, thank you.”
“Whatever. Let me get dressed and stay the hell out of my stuff.”
The apartment is dimly lit, with shadows stretching across the floor. The curtains are drawn, and there’s an empty wine glass on the coffee table. It’s the most un-Carmen-like I’ve ever seen her. The contrast between this and her usual buttoned-up self throws me, but it also makes her feel more real, more reachable.
Thirty minutes later, as I’m whistling to myself, Carmen steps into the entryway with her auburn hair hanging loosely down her back. She halts her movements as I stare at her, the tired and hungover look long gone from her features, and she pops her hips out.
“What?”
I shake my head and smile. “Nothin’ at all, Sunshine. Ready for a nice day? Would do you some good to give that working brain a good break, don’t you think, and make the best of it?”
She mumbles something I don’t hear under breath as she heads for the front door and nods her head toward the opening as if telling me to get the hell out of her home.
Yeah, I definitely missed her harshness just a little.
***
We managed to slip out a back entrance, dodging the paparazzi camped outside. Breakfast was a quiet affair, Carmen nursing her coffee like a lifeline. But now, as we stroll down the crowded sidewalk, the city’s energy seems to be working its magic on her. The laughter and chatter around us grow, matching the festive atmosphere.
Carmen tugs a fuzzy-topped hat over her ears, looking more like herself with each passing minute. Despite her initial reluctance, I can see Carmen starting to relax. The tension in her shoulders eases slightly, and there’s a hint of a smile playing at the corners of her mouth. I can’t help but wonder what else happened during that girls’ night out. What secrets did they share? What did they say about me?
I shake off the thought. Focus, Donny. We’ve got a fake engagement to figure out.
Carmen glances around and shivers slightly, a frown on her face. I’m about to suggest we do something inside when I notice her eyes brighten at something ahead — the ice skating rink. As we walk, I can see the gears turning in Carmen’s head. She needs a distraction, something to clear her mind before we dive into planning.
A smile overtakes my face because I know exactly what we’re going to do, then after that we’ll end the day with some hot chocolate.
The one thing I can count on in the city, especially during this time of year, is all the places that sell hot chocolate and I know just the right place to take her. Before she can have a moment to reject the idea, I thread my fingers through hers and pull her through the growing crowd toward the ice rink littered with families.
It doesn’t take long for me to grab two pairs of skates, pay our way in, and help Carmen lace her skates tight enough that I know they won’t fall off. She’s frowning when I look at her and I cock my head to the side, smiling. “Don’t look at me like that. You know this is exactly what you wanted to do.”
Her brows furrow and she shakes her head, then mumbles, “Whatever,” before slowly easing off the bench and making her way toward the entrance of the rink.
She eyes the crowd warily, waiting for the perfect chance to fall in line with everyone else, while I sit still with my gaze focused on her. I’ve never felt the need to stare at her as much as I have been lately, and it’s a sensation.
Carmen looks over her shoulder at me and I wink. She gives me a slight smile and then glides easily onto the thick slab of ice.
Surrounding us are the tall buildings, followed by the honking of traffic, and not a single person bothers to worry about it. If there’s one thing I can appreciate about Christmas in New York City, it’s the pure delight on everyone’s face.
Including Carmen.
While no one else bothers to look at their surroundings, Carmen looks around in awe—as if she’s never seen anything quite like it before. She follows the flow of the crowd easily, not once losing her footing, while her face points up to the sky and a smile overtakes her face.
Something inside me stirs at the sight and makes me want to see more of that smile if I can help it.
I wish she would smile at me like that.
Even though the plan was to talk about how to get the story of our split out into the world, part of me wants to hold off on that and see how much closer I can get to her.
After her fifth or sixth lap around the rink, Carmen finally comes to a stop at the edge and finds me easily through the throng of people between us. She arches a brow, then shakes her head and starts coming closer to me.
“Well, you coming, Drummer Boy? This was your idea after all, would suck if you left me hanging.”
I glance from her to the ice, then back at her. “Uh, yeah.”
Although this was my idea, I didn’t think past the sparkle in her eyes before pulling us over here. The only thing I’ve ever been remotely good at was the drums, and the ice looks like it will be the death of me.
I’ll just have to suck it up.
I give her a nervous smile and nod, then lift from my spot on the bench. She eyes me, amusement shining in her eyes, and asks, “Don’t tell me you’ve never ice skated before.”
Her cheeks are turning pink from the cold and I shrug her words off, my wide frame aiming right for the ice ahead. “Let’s go before you freeze to death,” I mutter.
She stops me just before I step onto the ice and a group of younger kids zip past, their laughter echoing in the surrounding air. Her fingers have heat swimming through my body and a sensation I've never experienced in my bloodstream.
Carmen scrunches her eyebrows together, looks at the spot where she’s clasping my arm, and immediately drops the limb before mumbling something and slipping away from me.
Is it bad that I wish she’d touch me again and never stop?
As I watch Carmen glide across the ice, her earlier worries momentarily forgotten, I realize something.
I want to be by her side.