Chapter 33 ~ Isabella ~
"Y ou'll see, everything will be fine." Hayley spoke soothingly to me as I navigated the dented Toyota through New York's evening traffic.
I swallowed. Just a few hours ago, I hadn't even known I was expecting a child. Now we were driving through New York as a trio, and I had no idea what the future would bring.
"Probably. Yes, everything will be fine. Surely." My response sounded less than convincing. "It's probably better if I see Carter later. That way, I can carefully consider what I'll say to him. How I'll break it to him."
"Exactly," Hayley beamed. "Of course, you'll have to tell him soon, but for something like this, it's better to choose the right words. Well-thought-out words, not just something that comes to mind in the moment."
Well-thought-out words. I knew myself. I'd plan the words. And at the crucial moment, I'd fumble them just like I had with the pregnancy test, the car keys, the phone, or my wallet. And all the other things I'd misplaced over the past few years. The words would be filed away somewhere in my head, inaccessible as soon as I saw Carter.
"What if he doesn't believe the child is his?" I asked. The thought formed a knot in my stomach.
"Why wouldn't he believe that?" Hayley looked at me in surprise.
"He accused me of being a fraud at the wedding. In that case, wouldn't it be logical for him to think I'm trying to pin the child on him?"
"Why would you do something like that?" For Hayley, the whole situation was simple. Of course, she wasn't directly involved. For the person giving advice, everything was always straightforward.
"To get money through the child. Carter is rich." I considered. Maybe I wasn't even the first woman to make such demands of Carter. He probably had a lawyer who dealt with these things.
"If Carter doubts it, there's always a paternity test." Hayley viewed the situation quite pragmatically. "He won't be able to shirk his responsibility."
I nodded.
That was certainly true. Carter would have to provide for his child. But... that wasn't really what I wanted.
I didn't want financial support. At least not just that.
I wanted Carter back.
I wanted a father for my child and someone who would believe me, even without a paternity test.
It was literally all or nothing.
That's why I was so nervous.
There was a red light ahead. I took my foot off the gas and downshifted. A slight jolt went through the Toyota, and it began to sputter.
"That was fourth gear. Not second." Hayley glanced at me sideways. "Are you sure you're okay to drive? I can take us home if you'd like."
"It's just... I thought for a moment I was going to feel sick again," I lied as we stopped at the light. I didn't want to admit to Hayley what was going through my mind. I felt a bit ridiculous because I couldn't get my thoughts off Carter.
The light turned green.
I put the car in gear and started to move.
My car jerked briefly and then stalled.
Killed it.
The drivers behind us started honking.
"Come on, Isabella, let's switch. I can drive. You're not feeling well. It's no wonder after everything you've been through lately and what happened today." Hayley placed her hand caringly on my arm.
"No. I'm driving." I started the engine again. This was ridiculous. Of course I could manage to get us home. I didn't need any help with that. Not even from my friend. Damn it, I was going to raise a child soon. A child! I'd have to overcome much bigger challenges. I couldn't just give up on a simple car ride.
I started driving.
At that moment, my phone rang.
Carter?
That was the first thought that crossed my mind.
My heart began to beat faster and my breathing became shallow. I hastily tried to fish my phone out of my bag. But the bag wasn't on the passenger seat as usual. Hayley was sitting there. I felt around in the footwell behind the car seats. That's where I had put the bag earlier.
"Isabella, what are you doing?"
"The phone... I..." I groaned, still trying to reach the bag. Where had I put the phone? Hopefully, I could feel it without much difficulty. But first, I had to get my hands on the bag.
"Stop that!" Hayley's voice sounded sharp. "Are you trying to kill us all? Both of us and your child too?"
I quickly pulled my arm back to the front. Of course I didn't want that.
"I... I thought it might be Carter." As I said these words, I felt pretty stupid. The phone had stopped ringing.
"I thought he didn't know your new number."
"Right." I stared straight ahead through the windshield, glad that Hayley couldn't see the blush rising to my cheeks in the darkness.
Hayley sighed. "I'll make you a nice foot bath at home. Then you can relax a bit. For now, just concentrate on the road. The phone can wait until later."
I nodded obediently.
"Even if it had been Carter... you want to tell him everything calmly, right? Not while you have to drive?"
I nodded again.
Hayley was more than right with all her objections.
Drive, Isabella, drive. Then you'll be home soon and can think about all these things in peace. Today was just a bit too much for you.
"Where are you taking us?" Hayley nudged me.
"What?" I looked around searchingly.
"This isn't the way home. You took a wrong turn just now. We're heading back to Carter's company." Hayley's voice was meaningful.
I looked around. Hayley was right. Without realizing it, I had turned. Twice, even. We were on a parallel street that led straight back to Carter's penthouse.
Isabella, focus now. Otherwise, you'll be driving in circles for hours.
But my heart and my brain didn't want to be convinced by all these reasonable arguments.
How could Carter still stir me up like this after everything that had happened?
You love him, Isabella.
I tried with all my might to ignore the voice in my head. But I couldn't.
I loved Carter.
That's exactly why the prospect of him not wanting me anymore made me so nervous. What should I do? How could I calm down? How could I stand the time until I saw him again and finally had certainty?
"Watch out!" At that moment, Hayley's voice jerked me out of my daydreams. Startled, I looked ahead. There were two red brake lights visible in the darkness. Close. Much too close.
I slammed my right foot on the brake and pressed down hard. The Toyota swerved slightly and I gripped the steering wheel tighter.
Brake. Damn it, brake already.
Time suddenly seemed to pass very slowly. But that didn't change the fact that I couldn't do anything to avert the impending catastrophe. Helplessly, I stared ahead as we continued to roll towards the car in front of us and finally pushed it forward with an audible thud .
Shit.
Again.
Those were the first two thoughts that shot through my mind. Not even two months ago, I had caused an accident and met Carter in the process. Now the same thing was happening to me because I was constantly thinking about Carter.
Only this time I certainly wouldn't be as lucky as I was with Carter. This time I would have to answer for the damage I had just caused.
"Oh Isabella. Are you alright?" Hayley's concerned voice brought me back to the present.
"I... Yes." Exhausted, I let my head sink onto the steering wheel. What a day. I had already thought earlier that it couldn't possibly get any worse. But that had proven to be a fallacy. I wanted to go home. I wanted... Carter.
Instead, I would have to deal with an upset accident opponent. Just like in the accident six weeks ago, I had no idea how I would pay for the damage now. To be more precise, I had even less of an idea than back then where I would get the money from.
An energetic knock reached my ear. Tiredly, I lifted my head from the steering wheel. I would have preferred not to look up at all, but that was no use. In the end, I had to face reality.
The sooner you get this over with, the sooner you can go home.
A man was standing in front of the side window. In the darkness, I could only make out his silhouette, but it seemed oddly familiar. He bent down to speak to me.
At that moment, my heart stopped.
For a millisecond.
Then it kept beating.
More wildly than ever before.
Carter.
Carter was standing in front of me.
What was he doing here?
Had he been looking for me?
The moment I had longed for had now arrived. And what was I doing? I sat rooted to the driver's seat, unable to move.
"That... that's him," I breathed.
"Who?" Hayley wanted to know. She had never seen Carter before and therefore didn't recognize him.
"Carter. That's Carter." I pointed outside.
"That's Carter?" Hayley sounded incredulous. So much had already happened this evening that she probably thought I was hallucinating.
I just nodded.
"What are you still doing here? Come on, get out." Hayley nudged me in the side again. Gently at first. Then a little more energetically. "If you just sit here, he'll think you don't want anything to do with him anymore."
Of course, I didn't want that.
Slowly, infinitely slowly, I opened the door and put my feet on the street. New York traffic rolled past my car. I got out and leaned the door back.
"Isabella." There he stood in front of me. As attractive as ever. As alluring as ever. In the darkness, I couldn't perceive the bright blue of his eyes as clearly as usual, but I knew, I felt, that look was there.
"I've been looking for you everywhere. I'm so sorry." Carter's words reached my ear. I had trouble understanding them correctly. What was he talking about? I had just rear-ended him. What was he sorry for? That we...
"I was such an idiot! Cameron and Abigail set us up. They laid a trap for us. I never cheated on you. And you didn't cheat on me either, did you? Or... do you still have something going on with that man from the hotel?"
I stared at Carter. Slowly, I began to comprehend what he was telling me.
"Of course not. I'm not with anyone," I stammered. "And you and Abigail..." I couldn't bring myself to finish the question, so afraid was I of the answer.
"I don't care about Abigail. I never did. It only started with her because..." Carter took a deep breath. "Cameron and I are old rivals. It goes back to high school. One day, when we're somewhere quiet, I'll tell you the whole story. But anyway, my behavior was inexcusable. I should have talked to you. I should have listened to your side of the story instead of just kicking you out. I..." Carter struggled for words.
"You didn't just want to get rid of me early?" I had to ask this question to know if Carter really had feelings for me.
"Early?"
"After the wedding, everything would have been over anyway." The contract had only stipulated that I appear as Carter's fiancée at the celebration and receive $50,000 for it.
Carter looked at me heatedly. Even now on the dimly lit street, I could feel the intensity of his gaze. "Forget the contract. I..." He swallowed. "I only want you. It's been that way the whole time. I just didn't want to admit it because it scared me so much. I'd rather chase you away than confront my fears."
Speechless, I stared at Carter. I had never heard such words from a man before. He... he was laying his innermost self bare before me, and I wanted so badly to believe him. But there was still one thing that needed to be cleared up.
No, two.
"So you didn't... reconcile with Abigail?" I asked again. I just had to be sure about this matter.
"What makes you think that?" Carter's voice couldn't have sounded more surprised.
"At the wedding, Abigail told me that she... that you... well, just before we in the office..." I couldn't bring myself to finish the sentence properly. But Carter understood me anyway.
"Of course I didn't reconcile with her. As I said, I'm glad to be rid of Abigail. I... I don't want to lie to you or hide anything from you." Carter cleared his throat. "After the wedding, Abigail tried to hook up with me one last time. She came to my house."
With a pounding heart, I looked at Carter. He continued: "I made it clear to Abigail that she should never contact me again. This time she understood. From what I've heard, she's gone on a trip to Europe with her father." Carter shrugged. "Maybe she'll have more success with men there."
I didn't know what to say.
Carter swallowed. "You can't imagine how happy I am that I found you, Isabella. I... I love you. Can you forgive me?" Carter looked at me pleadingly.
I would have gladly thrown myself into his arms right away. I looked at him seriously. "There's something else I need to tell you."
Carter's eyes flickered strangely and his voice sounded tense. "What?"
I considered how best to tell him that...
"I'm pregnant," I blurted out.
Carter didn't move an inch.
My heart skipped a beat.
It was over.
The end.
He didn't like children.
He didn't want me like this.
"You're going to be a father," I added dejectedly.
"I'm going to be a father?" Carter looked at me in disbelief.
"Yes," I nodded.
"Oh... oh... oh... I'M GOING TO BE A FATHER!" Carter shouted at that moment so loudly that passersby on the sidewalk turned to look at us. "I'M GOING TO BE A FATHER."
Then he pulled me into his arms and buried his face in the crook of my neck. I breathed in his masculine scent and felt his athletic body press against me.
"You're simply amazing, Isabella Abbott. You rear-ending me at a green light that day was the greatest luck of my life."
"Wait a minute... the light was green?" I stared at Carter.
He grinned. "Yes. And luckily, I was so distracted that I didn't drive off."
After a millisecond, I laughed. "Then I'm not such a bad driver after all."
"No. And even if you were, I couldn't care less." Carter looked at me seriously. "I love you, Isabella Abbott."
I swallowed. "I love you too," I whispered.
And then Carter did exactly what I had secretly wished for during our first encounter a few weeks ago.
He simply kissed me right in the middle of the street.