Chapter Nineteen
NINETEEN
JACKSON
I need to stop miscalculating these situations.
I am the best game strategist out of the three of us, and yet I didn’t foresee the absolute shit show before me.
“What’s this your yi ma is talking about?” My mom grabs my elbow and ushers me to the side of the auditorium. “She said she met your girlfriend. Since when do you have a girlfriend?” Her eyes dart around as she tries to keep her voice hushed from onlookers. “ Waa ngo zi, ” she pushes, switching to Cantonese.
The recital starts in just a few minutes, and I barely made it in time with all the weekend traffic. I’m hot and gross and don’t want to deal with this.
I can’t exactly say that Auntie An is lying because that will just earn me more scrutiny. I also can’t admit that I was lying because that’s just going to land me in hot shit, too. I really dug myself a grave here. If only life was a video game, and I could revert to my last save so I never went to that damn nail salon.
But then I’d still be stuck going on endless dates .
I am beginning to wonder if there is any way for me to win. It seems like every path just leads me to a dead end.
“You can stay silent, but a picture speaks a thousand words, and my sister has the pictures to prove it.” Mom pulls out her phone and brandishes a photo my aunt must have taken last weekend when Deer and I left the salon. It’s…not great. My hand sits low on her back and I’m leaning down, almost like I’m whispering in her ear. “Your po po has seen them.” She starts waggling the phone up at me, narrowly missing my chin. “Well? What do you have to say for yourself?”
My mouth opens but I seriously can’t think of an excuse to save my life.
So, I just dig my grave deeper instead.
“I’m sorry, I didn’t want to tell you until I was sure. An yi caught me off guard.”
The cold glare in her eyes begins to thaw. “So, you have a girlfriend?”
“Yup.”
Nail in the coffin. No going back.
The phone lowers so it’s no longer a threat, and my mother gives me a look that teeters on annoyance. “You should have told me.” She taps the phone against my arm with a huff.
“Sorry.”
The lights begin to dim, and the chatter around us falls to a light hum.
“We’ll discuss this later. Come on.” Mom takes off without a second glance.
We take our seats in the second row, where Dad has kept our spots. I slide next to my mom, taking my place at the end of the row. It lets me stretch my legs out so I’m not cramped for the next few hours.
My thoughts swirl with the fact that I am now going to have to find a way to keep up this ruse without getting caught.
Angela is the third student to take the stage, and even though I know the lights are blinding, she still manages to search the crowd and find me. I give her a thumbs up, just in case. She takes her seat on the bench, and the audience seems to quiet even further as the first few notes ring out. She plays “Raindrop” without missing a beat, the tune weaving through the air like a swan gliding across a clear lake. When the final note rings out, it bounces throughout the auditorium. The resounding applause is the loudest so far, and I share a look with my parents, pride shining on all our faces.
The next two hours pass by in a blur, and I have to ignore the quiet buzzing of my phone in my pocket the entire time. Whoever is blowing it up better have a good reason.
When it comes time for the adjudicators to award first through third place, my mom clasps her hands tightly in her lap. I reach over and place my hand over hers. The announcer calls Angela’s name for second place, and I can feel the dejection ripple out from my mom.
“It’s fine,” I whisper.
She tsks, her eyes narrowing. “That Han boy shouldn’t even be in the same category as her. Everyone knows he is being classically trained; it’s not fair. How is Angela supposed to win with him there?”
“Ma.” I give her hand a squeeze.
The lights come up and the audience applauds for the three students on stage. Mom plasters a smile on her face as Angela comes down the stairs.
“Great job, Angie.” I reach down and scoop her up in a giant hug.
She wriggles in my arms. “Ohmigod, go go . Stop, you’re so embarrassing.”
I place her back down and she makes a fuss of straightening out her black performance dress. I can tell she’s annoyed that the certificate in her hand doesn’t have a shiny gold circle on it, but at least she seems a little more distracted.
“She should have played a harder piece.”
My eyes cut to Auntie An, who appears next to me like a ghost summoned from the trenches. Her words are spoken in a hush, but Angela is close enough that if she decides to pay attention, she’ll hear the judgmental tone.
“‘Raindrop’ was the right choice. I couldn’t play it that seamlessly when I was her age.”
“That’s not saying much.”
I clench my jaw to keep from saying something disrespectful even though she deserves it. God, she fucking deserves it. Bitterness stems from my mother’s sister like weeds from the crack in a sidewalk.
It’s a tradition in our household to learn an instrument while growing up, and both Angela and I had leaned into piano—even though I think our father still wishes one of us had picked up the violin. Still, I was never the most musically inclined. I was better at sports in school—specifically swimming. I won countless medals for breaststroke, but my aunt would always mention how her son was stacking trophies at national recitals. Her competitive nature against my mom does my head in, and I hate that I’m dragged into the middle of it time and time again.
“I don’t see your little girlfriend.” She makes an exaggerated effort to look around the room.
“She was busy.”
“Too busy to meet your family? After a direct invitation?” She scoffs. “I would say I’m shocked, but it seems fitting. She didn’t exactly look like a respectable woman.”
Fire licks at my skin with every word she enunciates, a beast within me stirring awake as she continues to poke at me—poke at Deer, like she has any clue what kind of woman she is.
“ Po po will be disappointed. She was so interested to meet her, and this is not a great first impression.”
“I never told po po she would be here.” The accusation is clear in my voice.
Auntie An raises her thin eyebrows in nonchalance.
I am going to have to come up with a better excuse for this whole situation since it seems like she is dead set on making a fuss about Deer—on making me seem like lesser than her son in the eyes of my grandmother.
For the first time today, I think that maybe I should have brought Deer here with me. It is a lot harder to deal with a fake girlfriend when it seems like she barely exists. She would also know what to say. Deer spends all day using that fake high-pitched voice and putting on a performance for her viewers as The Cozy Deer. I have no doubt that she would be able to spin this story better than me.
“All right, who is ready for dim sum?” Dad comes over and begins to usher us all out of the auditorium, trying to ease the growing tension that is floating around us like a gray cloud.
I take the chance to separate myself from my aunt, getting ahead of everyone so I can retreat to my car without any further questions until I’m trapped at the restaurant. I shove my hand in my pocket, fishing around for my car key as we filter out into the high school’s parking lot.
“ Ka-yee. ”
I freeze at my grandmother calling me by my given name.
“ Nei neoi peng yau hai been ?”
Where is your girlfriend?
Shit.
I look down to see my grandmother has snuck her way over to me during the shuffle. She is peering around, not in an accusatory way, but there is definitely a suspicious glint in the way she is taking in the situation. Considering it seems like my supposed girlfriend sprang out of nowhere, I don’t blame her. Getting this ruse past her is going to be harder than convincing Auntie An—at least she’s seen Deer. My grandmother, on the other hand, is one of the sharpest women I know. The only person who can beat her at mahjong is my grandfather, and that’s because she secretly lets him win.
“Your yi ma said she was coming.”
God damn Auntie An.
“She—”
“Hey, Angela. Congratulations, your performance was totally magical.”
Every bone in my body turns to stone at the words.
I would recognize her voice in a room filled with a thousand people.
I turn around, and sure enough, Deer stands in front of my little sister. If not for her pink hair, I would’ve needed to do a double take. She’s dressed differently than normal—a white sundress that reaches just shy of her knees and a pair of pale pink heels that are nowhere near as tall as the shoes she normally wears. I hesitate to call it conservative because, despite her efforts, the dress does nothing to hide the killer cleavage she is sporting.
She holds out a bouquet of yellow roses, and my sister accepts, a confused smile on her face. Deer straightens and her gaze connects with mine.
I’m once again taken aback. Even her makeup is more subdued, lacking the glitter she typically douses herself in.
The entire look she has going on is so normal that it’s abnormal on her. Well, as normal as a girl with pink hair can look.
“Hi.”
She smiles at me, and I realize I was wrong. Even when she tries to tamp down her shine, she still sparkles like no one else I’ve met. Something about her is like cracking open a rock in a mine and finding the most stunning gemstone inside—it glitters from every angle, no matter what you do.
“Hey.”
The air whistles to a stop as she jogs the few feet over to me, and I’m a fucking sinful man watching the way her tits bounce. There is nothing family friendly happening in my brain.
“Are you surprised?”
“Uh…”
Yeah, I’m fucking surprised.
“I’m guessing you didn’t see my texts.” She rolls her eyes and nudges me playfully. “I know I said I wouldn’t be able to make it because of the appointment, but I knew I couldn’t miss this, so I found a way to make it work.”
“Right.”
What?
She bends around me and holds out the second bouquet in her arms, this one made of red roses. “ Nei hou. Ngo giu Deer. ”
“ Do ze. ” My grandmother takes the flowers from her with a smile. “ Nei siu dak hou leng .”
Deer falters for a second, blinking at my grandmother as her eyes widen a fraction. “I’m so sorry. That is basically all the Cantonese I know.”
“I said you have a pretty smile.”
“Oh! Thank you.” She stands back at my side and leans closer to me. Her arm is barely brushing mine, but it’s enough to send a crackle across my skin.
“ Taa han jau ji si, ” Po po tucks the bouquet close to her chest and sets off for my parents’ car.
She’s interesting .
Well, that isn’t a bad thing.
With my grandmother’s approval, everyone starts moving again, packing into their cars so we can make our drive to the restaurant. It is like a religious practice; whenever we have something to celebrate, we go to this hole-in-the-wall restaurant that’s been running for the last forty years—basically since po po immigrated here from China with my gung gung .
“Should I get in your car?” Deer keeps her voice hushed as she walks alongside me.
“Where did you park?”
“Like over there-ish. Doesn’t matter though, I’m getting in anyway. Looks more couple-y.”
She waves me off, the charms on her nails glinting in the sun, and makes her way to the passenger side. I can feel everyone’s eyes on me as I realize my mistake too late.
Fuck. I should’ve opened the door for her.
And because I can’t seem to catch a God damn break today, the back door opens, and I watch in the rearview mirror as my sister climbs into the back of my Jeep.
“Angela, what are you doing?”
“Mom said I could ride with you.” She closes the door with more force than necessary.
Great. How am I supposed to figure out what the hell is going on with Deer when I have Angela in the car? We are about to be surrounded by ten of my family members, and she has absolutely zero prep as my supposed girlfriend.
“So, this is your girlfriend?” Angela leans forward over the center console and peers at Deer without any remorse. “Is he blackmailing you or something?”
Without missing a beat, Deer laughs. “She’s funny. Clearly the humor in the family skipped a sibling.”
Angela pauses, reassessing her, but I see the way the compliment runs over her and soaks into her skin. She doesn’t smile, exactly, there’s just a slight twitch at the corner of her mouth as she says “thanks” before slumping back in her seat.
Angela doesn’t seem to notice the tension radiating from me or the way I keep sneaking glances at Deer, who seems to be cool as a fucking cucumber while she scrolls through her social media.
“So, how long have you been sucking face with my brother?”
I almost swerve off the road.