Chapter 25
Marissa
I flop onto my bed, staring up at the ceiling as I try to make sense of the mess that is my life. Bryce's kiss still lingers on my lips, a constant reminder of the complicated emotions that have been swirling inside me ever since that moment.
"Complicated doesn't even begin to describe it," I mutter to myself, rolling my eyes at the understatement of the century.
I mean, seriously, who would have thought that a simple kiss could turn my life upside down in such a short amount of time?
One minute, I'm convinced that Bryce sees me as nothing more than his sister's best friend, and the next, we're sharing a kiss that leaves me breathless and confused. Everything's blurred and confusing.
And now, things between us are more awkward than ever. We can't seem to have a normal conversation without stumbling over our words or avoiding eye contact like a couple of awkward teenagers. It's like we're both tiptoeing around each other, afraid to acknowledge what’s left unsaid.
I mean, come on, how hard can it be to just talk about what happened and figure things out like adults? But no, instead, we're avoiding each other at all costs and pretending like nothing happened.
I roll over onto my side, burying my face in my pillow as I try to drown out the cacophony of thoughts churning inside my head. I can't help but wonder if Bryce is just as confused and conflicted as I am.
Why did he kiss me?
I let out a frustrated sigh, running a hand through my hair as I try to make sense of it all. I mean, does he like me? Or was it just a onetime thing, a moment of weakness that he regrets?
Yet you're also hiding from him.
And what about me? Do I like him? Or am I just reading too much into things, letting my imagination run wild with the possibility of something more?
I shake my head, trying to clear away the fog of confusion that clouds my thoughts. I mean, let's be real here. I've had a crush on Bryce for years, but that doesn't mean he feels the same way about me. And even if he did, he's a famous actor with a complicated past, and I’m just his sister's best friend.
What if he does like you? What if he's just as scared and confused as you are? What if you're passing up the opportunity of a lifetime because you're too afraid to take a chance?
I let out a frustrated groan, burying my face in my hands as I try to silence the doubts and insecurities. I mean, seriously, why does everything have to be so complicated?
I glance up from my bed as Bryce knocks on the door, his voice breaking through the silence of the room. "Can I come in?"
I'm not ready to face him yet. While I want to be sure of where I stand, I'm too much of a wuss to actually talk to him. But I can't keep him standing out there forever. He knows I'm home.
"Come in," I call out, trying to keep my voice steady despite the nervous fluttering in my stomach.
The door creaks open, and Bryce steps into the room, his expression unreadable as he gazes at me. "Hey," he says softly, his voice laced with uncertainty. "How are you holding up?"
I force a smile onto my face, trying to mask the nervousness that churns in the pit of my stomach. "I'm good," I reply, my voice coming out a little too high-pitched for my liking. "How about you?"
Bryce shrugs, a hint of tension in his shoulders as he avoids my gaze. "I'm okay," he says, his voice betraying the underlying unease that lingers between us. "There's something we need to discuss."
A surge of anxiety floods through me at the seriousness in his tone, and I hold my breath. "What is it?" I ask, my voice tight.
Bryce takes a deep breath, his gaze flickering away from mine as he struggles to find the right words. Maybe he wants to reject me and is looking for the perfect way to phrase it so he doesn't hurt my feelings. Maybe he's here to end our fake marriage because the kiss has destroyed everything.
"My parents want us to have a big wedding," he says finally, his voice knitted with unease.
If I thought the impending heartbreak was bad, this is worse. A big wedding?
Anxiety rises within me at his words. "Bryce, we can't keep deceiving them like this," I say urgently, my voice trembling. "I mean, it's not fair to them or to us."
Bryce's jaw clenches, his gaze flickering away from mine for a moment before he meets my eyes again. I catch a glimpse of what looks like a pain in his eyes, his brows furrowing slightly as if he's struggling to make sense of something.
"I know," he says softly, his voice strained. "But I don't know how to tell them the truth without hurting them."
I take a deep breath, trying to steady my racing heart as I search for the right words. The air between us feels heavy, weighted with unspoken emotions and the lingering memory of that kiss. "Maybe we don't have to tell them everything," I say finally, my voice barely above a whisper. "But we can't keep pretending to be something we're not."
Bryce's eyes widen, a flicker of pain crossing his features before he quickly masks it. He nods slowly as his gaze drops to the floor.
"I know, and I promise we'll figure this out together."
***
I meet up with Cindy at our favorite coffee shop, hoping to distract myself from everything. But as soon as I sit down across from her, I know that there's no escaping the inevitable conversation.
"So, spill," Cindy says, her eyes sparkling with curiosity as she leans forward eagerly. "What's going on with you and Bryce? You two have been acting all weird lately."
I let out a nervous laugh, trying to play it cool despite the turmoil churning inside me. "Oh, you know," I say casually, waving a hand dismissively. "Just the usual drama."
Cindy raises an eyebrow skeptically, her expression clearly unconvinced. "Come on, Marissa," she says, her tone tinged with impatience. "You can't expect me to believe that everything's fine when you've been avoiding him like the plague."
I sigh, knowing that there's no point in trying to hide the truth from Cindy. She's always been able to see right through me, no matter how hard I try to put on a brave face. "Fine," I admit reluctantly, my voice tinged with resignation. "Things have been ... complicated."
Cindy nods in understanding, her expression softening as she reaches out to place a comforting hand on mine. "I get it," she says softly. "But you know Bryce is different when he's around you. I've never seen him like this before."
A surge of warmth washes over me at her words, a flicker of hope sparking inside me despite my best efforts to squash it. "What do you mean?" I ask, unable to keep the curiosity from my voice.
Cindy shrugs, a knowing smile playing at the corners of her lips. "I don't know," she says cryptically. "He's just ... softer, I guess. More vulnerable. It's like you bring out a side of him that he keeps hidden from the rest of the world."
"I can't believe your perception of your brother has changed so drastically."
"Well, I only say it the way I see it, and it's pretty obvious to anyone with eyes that you're the reason he's this different person."
The thought of being able to touch Bryce's heart in a way that no one else can sounds pleasing to me. But as quickly as the feeling comes, it's replaced by a wave of doubt and uncertainty.
"Come on," I say, forcing a laugh as I try to brush off her words. "Bryce and I are just friends. There's no possibility of anything more between us."
Cindy rolls her eyes, clearly unconvinced by my feeble attempt to deny the truth. "Sure," she says sarcastically.
My best friend studies me intently, her gaze piercing as she contemplates her response. "Marissa, I've known you both for years, and I've never seen Bryce act the way he does around you. It's like he's a completely different person. And it's not just the way he looks at you. It's the way he listens to you, the way he hangs on to your every word. It's like you have this power over him, this ability to bring out the good in him."
I furrow my brow, trying to make sense of Cindy's observations. "There's nothing romantic between us. We've always been just friends."
"I'm not saying that there's anything romantic between you two right now," she clarifies gently. "But there's definitely something there, Marissa. Something deeper than just friendship. I can see it in the way you look at each other, the way you interact. That kind of chemistry is rare."
I swallow hard, feeling a knot form in the pit of my stomach at Cindy's words. Could she be right? Does Bryce really look at me that way? Does he feel the same? It's a terrifying thought, one that I've tried to push to the back of my mind for fear of what it might mean.
"Sometimes, you have to follow your heart, regardless of what other people might think or say. And if your heart is telling you that there's something worth exploring with Bryce, then maybe it's worth taking a chance on."
I let out a frustrated sigh, knowing that there's no point in arguing with Cindy when she's made up her mind about something. "Fine, you win," I say, throwing my hands up in defeat. "But enough about me. How's everything going with you?"
Cindy's expression softens at the change of subject, and we spend the next hour catching up on each other's lives. But even as we laugh and chat, I can't shake the feeling of unease that lingers in the back of my mind.
After we finish our coffee, Cindy gives me a tight hug before heading out the door.
"Cindy," I say slowly, my voice trembling with uncertainty, "there's something I need to tell you."
"What is it?"
I take a deep breath, trying to steady my racing heart as I prepare to reveal my secret. "I've decided to move out of Bryce's place. I can't keep pretending like everything's okay when it's not. It's time for me to move on."
"Just remember," she says softly, her voice filled with sincerity. "Whatever happens with Bryce, I'll always be here for you."
I smile gratefully at her words, feeling a surge of gratitude wash over me at the thought of having a friend like Cindy by my side. But as I watch her disappear into the crowd, I wonder if I'll ever be able to untangle the mess that is my relationship with Bryce.