Epilogue
NAT
I had seen Asher be a lot of things in the years we’d spent together. I’d seen him be a rebel, a troublemaker, a partner in crime. An adrenaline junkie, a musician, a loyal friend, the getaway driver, and the person who had paid my bail more times than anyone else. And now, my days were filled with seeing him be a loving husband—to me, of all people—and a doting father to two kids he hadn’t planned for but loved all the same.
The first couple months after Asher had asked me to stay had been tricky. Things had already been in motion and shoots previously scheduled, so I’d gone to Ireland then to Barcelona and Liechtenstein. But after each shoot, instead of going to Portland or some other random destination I picked on a whim, I went home.
To him. To them .
And tomorrow, the four of us were about to set off on Route 66 with no itinerary except for us to stop whenever I was inspired. I could say that, in all my adventures, there’d never been one that would be as adventurous as this—traveling across the United States in a converted van with a fourteen-month-old and a four-year-old. And I couldn’t wait.
With my arms full of laundry, I strode down the hall and dropped the clothes in a pile on our bed, my ears perking up at the strum of a guitar. I tiptoed down the hallway to Owen’s room and peeked my head inside. The baby stood in his crib, gripping the side rails, grinning at Asher and June.
Asher sat in the rocking chair with June perched in his lap, a guitar held in front of them. “You’ve gotta hold it tight, bug. It might hurt your fingers a little bit till you get calluses built up like I do.”
“What’re calluses?” June asked.
Asher held out his hand, palm up, so she could see the rough patches on the tips of his fingers. Ones I knew the delicious scratch of intimately. “These. Fingers need to harden up to play.”
“Are they there forever?”
“They will be as long as I’m playin’ guitar. So, yeah, they’ll be there forever.” He pressed a kiss to her temple. “You wanna try again?”
“Yeah!”
“And maybe Nat wants to come in and listen instead of spyin’ at the door.”
I huffed out a laugh and stepped into the doorway, leaning against the jamb. “I don’t understand. I tiptoed here.”
“Cement blocks, wifey. I’m afraid you’re never gonna be able to sneak up on me.”
“Was that a challenge? Because it sounded like a challenge.”
He laughed low and shook his head before placing June’s fingers back on the strings. “All right, let’s play this, and then it’s bedtime.”
“But I’m not tired.” June’s shoulders slumped as she appraised us with a pout.
“You’re gonna be real tired in the mornin’ when we leave if you haven’t gotten any sleep.”
“Oh! I forgot to show you!” June shoved the guitar away and jumped off Asher’s lap before flying out of the room.
“You wanna talk about cement blocks? That girl runs like an elephant,” I said, thumbing over my shoulder to where June disappeared.
Asher laughed and set the guitar down next to him. “She must be learnin’ it from you.”
At one time, a comment like that probably would’ve sent me running for the hills. The idea that I was influencing impressionable children with how I lived my life was scary, to say the least. Unconventional, but that was okay. And though I’d only been a staple in their lives for a few months, I couldn’t imagine my life without them.
“Look what Mimi and Papa got me!” June ran into the room, a piece of paper flapping over her head.
“What do you have there?” I grabbed the paper from June and held it out in front of me.
“The Aunties got me colors and markers and paints, too, so we can color where we’ve been.”
The map of the United States was outlined with a thick black line and mostly blank, save for a tiny heart on the northern part of Mississippi. Across the top were the words, No matter where you go, you can always land back home .
To everyone else, this was probably just a map. Just a series of black lines on a white piece of paper. Something that could be ripped or crumpled or thrown away. Discarded without a second thought. But to me, it was encouragement. It was acceptance of who I was. Who we were as a family. Made all the more meaningful because it’d come from my parents.
I swallowed down the lump in my throat and met June’s smile with one of my own. “I love it.” I squatted down and wrapped an arm around June’s waist. “And I love you , Junie B, but it is bedtime.”
“Love you too, Nattie.” June squeezed me around the neck and hit me with the sad puppy eyes. “But we can still read a story, right?”
I never thought I’d see the day when I was wrapped around the fingers of two tiny people, and yet there I was. “Yes, we can. While Uncle Asher puts your brother down, we are gonna go on an adventure with Junie B. before our adventure begins tomorrow.”
Asher
June must have suckered Nat into more than one chapter because she didn’t come strolling out of the bedroom until thirty minutes later. I sat on the couch, guitar in my lap, as I scribbled notes on the song I was currently writing.
Working as part of a stable of songwriters had been amazing. I’d always loved this part of the job—the creation, the possibilities. That feeling of exhilaration when just the right verse poured out of me and I found the perfect notes to go along with it.
And considering what my life looked like now, I’d been finding it real damn easy to write songs. I’d known pain and heartbreak, grief and sorrow. But I’d also known laughter and excitement, new possibilities and endless love. And the love I had now, for Nat and those kids, was unlike any I’d ever known before.
“What’re you workin’ on?” she asked.
“Something new.” I scribbled one last note in my journal before closing the book.
“How’s it goin’?”
“Good,” I said, glancing up as she strode toward me wearing nothing but a tank top and a tiny pair of sleep shorts. “Especially when my muse is around.”
“You’re gonna be around this muse of yours twenty-four seven for the next month.” She took the guitar from my lap and propped it up next to me on the couch before straddling my lap. “But durin’ the next month, we’re gonna have to be incredibly creative about our grown-up time.”
I grinned. “I foresee a lot of outdoor activities in our future.”
“No doubt. But while we still have a great big bed, I was thinkin’ we should probably take advantage of that.”
I slid my hands up the outsides of her thighs, tucking my fingers beneath the material of her shorts. Palming her ass, I tugged her closer until our lips were a breath apart. “Oh yeah? What’d you have in mind?”
“How about you take me in there, and I’ll show you?”
In the five months since I’d asked her to stay, she’d shown me so much. Patience and adventure. Love and understanding. Acceptance and joy.
The kids and I had joined her in Nevada for a shoot at Valley of Fire. Then the four of us had traveled to Portland to pack up her apartment, then to Nashville to do the same for mine. We were nourishing little travelers in those two kids.
But even through all the trips the four of us had taken, Nat and I had also made sure June and Owen knew Havenbrook was home.
“I think that might be the best idea you’ve had all day.” I stood, palming her ass with her still wrapped around me, and strode toward our bedroom. The one we’d shared since the beginning.
A couple months ago, we’d cleaned out Aubrey and Nathan’s room, sorting through their things and donating what we could to the shelter, while keeping anything we were attached to.
Now, it was a playroom, a place where the kids could go if they missed their parents. A place where all of us could be together, surrounded by what started it all. Images of Aubrey and Nathan, of June and Owen, and the four of them together were interspersed with newer photos. Snapshots of me and Nat and the kids and this amazing, unexpected life we had together.
I stopped short in the doorway and met her stare with a raised brow. “Didn’t think this one through, did you?”
“What?” she asked before turning her head toward the heap of laundry piled on the bed. “Um…wall sex? Shower sex? Floor sex?”
I breathed out a laugh. “Thought the whole point was to take advantage of this great big bed.”
She unhooked her legs from around me and slid to the floor. Slipping her hands under my shirt, she tugged it up and off me before pressing up on her tiptoes and nipping my bottom lip. “I’ve misled you. The whole point is to have you inside me.”
With a groan, I gripped her around the waist, tugging her up and against me as I lowered us both to the bed, right over the clean laundry. I notched myself between her thighs and pressed down hard against her heat, knowing by the arch of her back, by the speed of her breaths, by how tightly she gripped my hair, that she wanted this now.
In the months we’d been together, I’d learned every facet of her. Every shadow, every secret was now for me, and I loved every complicated, unique, incomparable inch.
I thrust hard and brushed my lips down her neck, eliciting a loud moan from her. “We’re gonna have to get those sounds under control.”
She slapped her left hand over her mouth and caught her next moan with her palm. But that wasn’t going to do. For the next month, we may have to be quiet, but I sure as fuck was going to hear her sounds now.
I gripped her wrist, brought her hand to my mouth, and pressed a kiss on her wedding ring before pinning her arm above her head. “Tonight, those noises are mine.”
After stripping her down, I worshiped every inch of her body with my lips, tongue, and hands. Made her call out my name before I yanked her to the edge of the bed and stared down at this gorgeous creature. This wild thing that had somehow settled with me. My wife. Her ring glinted at me as she cupped her breast, running her thumb back and forth over her nipple, a mischievous smile curving her lips.
I never could’ve imagined this would be where I’d end up. Where we’d end up. Never could’ve foreseen that using downpour for the first time meant she’d be on that life raft with me for the rest of our lives.
It might’ve started out as nothing more than a lie to get the kids, but as I slid inside her, as I stroked us both toward our peaks, I knew I’d never felt anything more real than Nat’s love.