Faking Ever After

20. Finn

CHAPTER 20

Finn

I debated with myself for the next sixteen hours. My options were limited and none too soothing for my murmuring, aching heart. The split that ran through it was all of my own making. Had I not run, I could have given Percy a decent shot at doing the right thing instead of assuming he would side with his old bestie. Had I not fled from Dick Harrison, I never would have gotten to Naxos in the first place. I never would have fallen so stupidly and hopelessly in love. I never would have reached the point of wrecking everything that was good in my life. I never would have let my guard down.

But now it was too late. I had made my rash decisions and left a trail of ruin everywhere I meddled. Starting with giving your father a blessing to chase those promised returns , I thought.

I had this silly notion that rich men could be trusted with business matters. “We both make a nice profit,” Richard had said to my father over the phone while I listened with pupils dilating greedily. “This pie is big enough for everyone,” he’d promised. And, “I come from nothing, my good man. I worked two jobs in college just to get by. That’s the only reason I put my time into this project. To give people a leg-up that I had never been given. We’re going to show those selfish pricks on Wall Street that their time is up. Are you with me?”

We all were. But the last lingering apprehension in my father’s eyes only disappeared once he looked at me and received a small, hopeful nod.

I had tried to forget it ever since. I had tried telling myself that I hadn’t known any better than everyone else swept up in the scheme. I had tried convincing myself that it was the skill of the trickster that had fooled us all. But the truth was, I had been greedy. In the span of that phone call—where the head of the fund himself took the time to speak to my father—I had seen my comfortable life play out before my eyes. Julie’s college problems were solved, my parents’ leaking roof fixed, my life in the big city guaranteed…

“Is it safe enough for our savings, Mr. Harrison?” Father had asked in the last line of defense.

“My friend, I have staked my house and my car. Banks are old news, giving you interest that is equal to what they take in fees; all the while, inflation eats your money away like the waves of the sea would eat a cliff. I say to people they might as well sow their cash in their mattresses; it would take the same amount of economic literacy. We are talking about a disruptive technology. We’ve had enough of banks taking our money and selling last year’s snow. This will show them that we won’t play by their rules. We make the rules.”

Very well. The savings were safe.

And so four lives were changed forever in my home alone, with tens of thousands of homes just like ours.

This memory replayed itself over and over before my eyes throughout the first night in Hermes’ Hearth. The next morning, when I finished my breakfast in the inn downstairs, I pushed away those nasty thoughts and the endless game of what-could-have-been in favor of something more productive. I went down to the docks to ask about ferries to Mykonos or Athens or anywhere else from where I might be able to go home.

Home.

That was such a distant, abstract idea. Where was that place anyway? It sure as hell wasn’t the den I lived in back in New York. And the mere thought of returning to my parents with nothing to make things right made my heart clench.

So, I explored. I went through the harbor-side offices and asked about ferries until I had more information than I could make any sense of. With a rumbling stomach and too many dates, times, and prices to keep in line, I headed back to the inn. Desperate for a shower, I climbed the stairs to the rooms above the inn and passed through the small parlor.

By right, I should have known right away. I should have recognized the spicy scent of his cologne or the pleasant silence around him that differed so much from the lonely silence that surrounded me since last night. But I hadn’t expected to be discovered so easily and so quickly. Money drilled where drill bits couldn’t.

Percy lifted his hollow, tired gaze from his hands to me when I stepped into the parlor. “Finn,” he whispered as I took a surprised step backward. “Wait. Please.”

I blinked fast, my throat growing tight instantly. “P-Percy?”

He stood and squared his shoulders. “I’m sorry. I’m not a stalker, I swear…”

“How did you find me?” I asked, realizing in the next heartbeat that it was a useless, least important question. The real question was why he had found me. Had Richie gotten impatient? Had he spilled my beans to the family?

Percy’s brow creased with concern, shoulders sagging. “I…doubled your security.”

“My security?” I balked.

“When you told me about the man looking for you. I had my guys here watch out,” Percy said.

The thought of having been followed for hours sent chills down my spine. “I never saw anyone.”

Percy bit his lower lip guiltily. “You weren’t supposed to. They’re unobtrusive. Finn, listen…”

“No,” I said. “Hold on.” I took the key from my pocket and unlocked the door. If Percy could have people watching without me ever noticing, anyone could. “In here,” I said and led Percy into my tiny room, shutting the door and pushing the bolt through with a firm swipe of my hand. “I didn’t expect to see you.”

After a moment of silence, he said, “I didn’t expect you to go away like that.” His voice was sore and his emotion was almost too raw. He cleared his throat and pressed his lips together tightly, then relaxed a little and drew a shaky breath of air in. “I’m sorry, Finn. I should have known better and I take full responsibility. I do.” He straightened his back bravely, leaving me speechless and stunned. What was he…? “It was thoughtless and there’s no excuse. The best I can offer is that I didn’t know better at the time I invited my ex. I didn’t know you would be my ally, my friend, my…I didn’t know you would be so…wonderful.”

“Percy, that’s not…”

His face showed a sense of urgency, as if he had spent a great deal of time preparing what he would say. “He means nothing to me, Finn. A friend, yes, but I have no other feelings for Richie. It’s true. I once thought we were going to end up together. It was a natural progression. We’d gone from friends to lovers, from broke to rich. We had shared experiences which I mistook for serious feelings. I know now that the two are nothing alike.” He paused, letting those words settle and I fought hard against their alluring quality. I didn’t want him to apologize to me. It was the most unfair and ridiculous turn of events. But Percy wouldn’t let me stop him now. “I should have known that my ex coming to the party would upset you. Especially since Apollo’s Lantern and the days in the mountains, Finn. I feel so stupid for not making sure you felt safe enough with me before I brought my ex into the mix. So. Here I am, far too late, to make sure you feel safe, Finn.”

Tears blurred my vision as I spun away from him. “Percy,” I whispered, strangled. You wonderful, people-pleasing, ever-comforting person… But the words were stuck in my throat.

“Finn, I’m begging you,” he said with more desperation than I would have expected from him. “We had a good thing. I think we did. These weeks with you, away from all the work I do to make my life appear meaningful, I’ve felt more alive than I have in years. You make me laugh. You make me happy. I can’t let my lack of thoughtfulness ruin everything because I know I can do better.”

And for what it was worth, under his own premise, Percy truly stepped up. The only problem was that he had never had any reason to step up. He had never done anything wrong.

And he didn’t know the whole truth.

“Percy,” I said in a slightly stronger tone, turning around to face him. “Percy, you did nothing wrong. Not a single thing. And that only makes this harder because I’ve done plenty.”

“I’ll do something wrong right now if that will make you happy,” Percy huffed.

That was, without a doubt, the most romantic thing anyone had ever said to me. It wasn’t a grand proclamation of love, but a gritty willingness to do whatever was necessary just to make me smile. Unknowingly, I was already smiling. It took effort to smooth the smile out of my face. I didn’t want to hope. And I didn’t want to give him hope. What I had to do was be done with it quickly. It was the least painful way.

“Yesterday,” I began cautiously, then made myself relax into this as much as I could. No more secrets. “I was ready to tell you everything, Percy. I promised myself I would. And then I got scared out of my skin and all I could do was run away. But here you are. And this is me, making good on that promise to be less vengeful and more trusting.” I inhaled a deep breath of air and held it in my lungs for a heartbeat or two. As I exhaled, the words came naturally. It looked like I did trust him after all. Or I was so ready for what was inevitable. “The very reason I am here is because I’m not an honest guy, Percy. I pretended to be someone else to get my hands on an item of great significance. It contains files, emails, and internal accounting that followed the scam that ruined my family. I’m a hateful person. I was out to have revenge. But when I stole this drive, I realized it was useless to me until someone could crack through the security on it. And I needed to buy myself time, so I tracked down Kim in a way that looked like an accidental bump. The reason we were together is because I lied and cheated my way to you, Percy.”

Percy wore an honestly bewildered expression for a moment. “Finn, I knew that much already. I don’t understand why this is an issue now.”

“Because I’m no better than Benny Tupper,” I said, my voice rising with urgency. Why couldn’t he see I was trouble? Why couldn’t he just agree that he was better off without me?

Percy frowned, cocked his head, and examined me with great attention. “You know, you’re kinda cuter than Benny Tupper.”

A laugh burst out of me before I could stop it. Don’t make me fall in love with you all over again when I am trying so hard to make you fall out of it . “Percy,” I pleaded softly. “That’s not all.”

He blinked and waited.

“Look, I lost. I lost the whole thing and I lost you before I even gave it an honest chance. I might as well tell you and let you decide what you want to do.” I put my hand inside my pocket, took out the flash drive and handed it to Percy.

He hesitated a moment and saw the furious determination on my face before he took the drive over. He was still apprehensive about it, as if he was holding an unconscious rattlesnake that was starting to stir and he lifted his gorgeous eyes to meet my steely gaze. “There. Have it. It contains everything. Like I said, it’s useless to me.”

“Finn, this is your lifeline. Isn’t it?” He made a move as if to return it.

“No.” I stepped back, relief rolling through me once again. “It’s Sauron’s ring if it’s anything. It makes me hateful and vengeful and maybe I deserve it if the worst now happens. Percy, the man I ran away from was Richie.”

Percy’s mouth opened and then closed. He blinked once, his head making the slightest motion of a shake before he stopped himself and tilted it. “Richie…?”

“ Your Richie,” I said.

“I don’t understand,” Percy whispered in dry shock.

So I told him. I told him everything from the first conversation Richie and my father had had over the phone. I told him how the scheme recruited poor people pouring their savings to inflate the price of these crypto coins until the rich ones were happy and sold their vast holdings, unloading them onto a market that didn’t actually exist. They had pulled their and everyone else’s money out and left us all with worthless digital coins. I told him how I’d tracked Richie down in exclusive clubs in New York City by doing odd jobs where he was likely to show up. I told him how I’d flirted with Richie under an alias and how I’d led him by his horny, coke-filled nose all the way to his penthouse time after time, making him beg and wait and hope for what he believed was promised. I told him how I’d seen Richard’s flash drive, his emails, his spreadsheets, and how I’d stolen the drive late one night before deciding I had to get out of the city.

“And you thought…” Percy said, his face contorting with pain.

I nodded. “I thought that you would hate me when you knew who I wanted to ruin. He made you rich, or so you tell everyone, even if it was your own brilliance that made any of it possible. He was once the love of your life. And I’m just a stranger who wants him behind bars.”

Percy was silent for a little while, his face moving between anger and hurt. I hated that I had done this to him. But now he knew. I was a toxic asset and all I brought to people was pain.

Finally, in a bitter and dark tone that made the remains of my heart shatter into dust, clutching the drive like I’d try to pry it out of his hands, Percy said, “And I let that monster right into my home, led him straight to you. God, Finn, I fucked up. I don’t know how to make this right.”

I waited a moment longer. Where was the outrage? Where was the hate for all I had done? Stunned, I licked my lips, then fell quiet even before I could make a sound.

“I was supposed to keep you safe. Instead, I brought the man looking for you right to you,” Percy said apologetically. “Forgive me. Please.”

“You…you’re supposed to be angry with me,” I told him thinly, struggling to speak over the lump in my throat.

“With you? What for?” Percy looked at me with blank confusion.

“B-because…” I stammered and choked up, hope bubbling in me like soap balloons and opening up that terrible fear that everything that was good and kind in my life would slip out of my grasp. “Because…”

Percy stepped forward, taking my hand in his and pressing the drive into my palm. “Finn, you were dragged through the kind of hell I wouldn’t wish on my worst enemy. People who are willing to sell you hope and leave you holding the bag are the most despicable human beings, if you can call them that. No personal history can make me look past that, Finn.”

“You…believe me?” I dared to ask. I didn’t know where that courage came from. Hope was such a fickle thing.

“Even if you didn’t hand all the proof over to me, not knowing whether I would give it back to you or him, I would believe you. But as it is, you have all it takes to go to the authorities, Finn.” Percy balled his fists. “Say what you will. It was reckless of me to bring my ex into the mix, even if he wasn’t a criminal following your scent. And for that, I am sorry.” He licked his lips. “As for Richard, I wouldn’t dream of standing in your way.”

I reached over and offered him the drive back. “I can’t crack this. I’m the kind of person that inserts the USB drive correctly only on their third attempt.”

Percy met my gaze and chuckled. Then, gently, he took the drive from me. “I can help you with that.”

We stood in companionable silence that was littered with too many loose threads.

“I thought I lost you,” Percy said. “Because of my own carelessness.”

I shook my head. “Percy, you could never lose me. That’s not how that would work. But…have I not lost you by now?”

He let out a soft chuckle and stepped closer to me, taking my hand once he had pocketed the drive. “You think you’re such a terrible person, Finn, but the truth is that you’re the best man I’ve ever met. You’re bubbling with positivity. Everyone likes you. And the best attempt at lying had gotten you to the point of ripping by your seams until you told me the truth. I don’t blame you for distrusting rich assholes. I don’t blame you for not telling me. If I were you, I hope I would have done the same. So, no. You haven’t lost me. And you won’t lose me. Because the reality is very simple, Finn. I am in love with you. And I am in love with you more every time I see you.”

My heart tripped and stumbled. It skipped a few beats and hurried to catch up, then lifted in my chest. I had never thought I would hear these words from him. Tears brimmed in my eyes, and I trembled. Holding back these emotions took all the effort I had. “Can you please pinch me and make sure I’m not dreaming this?”

Percy squeezed my hand instead. “I promise that you’re not dreaming. I…I thought you knew. I love you, Finn.”

“I love you,” I blurted hurriedly before he could even assume I didn’t feel the same. Because I did. I very much did. “I love you. I love you.”

“I love you, I love you, too,” he said, a laugh bursting out of us both. “God, can I kiss you? I really need to kiss you.”

I laughed a little more and nodded. “You can kiss me all you like, Percy.” My love , I thought.

And he did. He kissed me then and he kissed me with blazing passion. He kissed me until the tears spilled down my cheeks, hot and happy. And still, he kept kissing me, holding me, keeping me in the safety of his arms and in the heaven of his lips.

He kissed me the way you only kissed someone you loved. Without questions, without judgment, without reservations.

And I kissed him back just as passionately.