Chapter 23 #2
Her hand flew to her mouth as a peal of laughter escaped before she could stop it. She folded an arm over her stomach and bent double as helpless paroxysms of laughter took her.
When she was finally able to breathe again, she straightened to finding him watching her with a bemused smile on his face.
“I-I think we have a winner,” she told him hoarsely, swiping tears from her eyes.
“Yeah?”
“Absolutely.”
He gave her a quick hug and a kiss. The affectionate gestures came so easily to him.
But she was becoming a lot better at the casual touches and impulsive kisses.
Yesterday, she’d happily held his hand in front of his sister and friends, and she hadn’t felt so much as a twinge of self-consciousness.
“What should we have for breakfast?” he asked.
“I think it’s closer to lunch time. I can’t believe we spent most of the day lounging around in bed. I don’t think I’ve ever been this…lazy.”
“To be fair, we were burning quite a lot of calories,” Smith said and she smiled.
“We could go to MJ’s for lunch?”
“I say we avoid MJ’s for a few days. Just about every single person in town was at that game the other night, and those who weren’t were probably live streaming it.”
Kenny winced at the reminder.
“I have an idea,” he murmured and she tilted her head curiously. She wasn’t sure she liked that gleam in his eye.
“Oh?”
“I think if you give it a chance, you might enjoy it. But just sit with the suggestion for a bit before you decide, okay?”
“O-kay?”
“I think it would do us good to get away from town and civilization for a bit. Just give ourselves room to breathe and time for the next thing to go viral on TikTok or whatever.”
“How do you propose we do that?”
“‘Go camping,’ he said. ‘It’ll be fun’, he said.” Kenny was huddled in the freezing tent, her puffer jacket hood up over her head, as she stared at the four women looking back at her with varying degrees of amusement, sympathy, and dismay on their faces.
She was just grateful that he’d at least chosen a spot with decent mobile coverage. On day one she’d snuck behind a tree to FaceTime Tina and her sister-in-law had added Beth and Libby to the call. Beth had quickly brought Fern in as well.
A month ago, Kenny would never have believed that she would be speaking like this to these four women. That they’d be her tribe; the women she went to when she needed a sympathetic ear. But this was the third call in as many days and she was beginning to depend on them to keep her sane.
“Just tell my idiot brother that you want to come home,” Tina advised.
“I agree,” Beth said. “Your nose is pink with cold. Why is it so cold there? It’s summer, for God’s sake!”
“Normal for the Outeniqua mountains, apparently. It drops to like eleven degrees at night. And it’s always misty and drizzly,” Kenny said with a shudder.
Smith had rhapsodized about his second-favorite camping spot on the drive up the mountain pass, and Kenny had been excited to see this natural paradise that he couldn’t stop raving about.
But by the time they’d reached the campsite, the temperature had plummeted and it had begun to drizzle.
The campsite was a short distance away from where he left the Land Rover, which meant that, because of her injured foot, he’d had to piggyback Kenny to the spot and leave her there while he loped back and forth for supplies.
Waiting for him to return every time after he’d left her in that creepy clearing had been a little terrifying. And she’d been relieved when he’d finally returned a third and final time.
It hadn’t been too bad once he’d set up their campsite and got a fire going.
She’d enjoyed cuddling up next to him, enjoyed the warmth of the blaze. She’d even decided that maybe it wasn’t so bad after all. Until she needed the bathroom and Smith handed over a roll of toilet paper and a headlamp and directed her to a nearby bush.
Everything in her had balked. But her need had been urgent and she’d had to make do.
Once they’d bedded down for the night, zipping their sleeping bags together to create a cozy nest, Smith had fallen asleep almost immediately, while Kenny had struggled to relax.
Every sound had terrified her. She worried about mountain lions and snakes and worms and spiders and serial killers and—because it was a full moon—werewolves.
By the following morning, despite the spectacular view that had awaited her when she left the tent, Kenny had already known that camping was not for her.
Smith, however, was truly in his element out here. So efficient at everything. And Kenny found his competence in the wild very sexy. She also hadn’t minded the exciting novelty of making love under the stars on their second night. Until the cold had driven them back to their sleeping bags.
But all in all, she’d rate the actual camping experience a solid two and a half out of ten.
“Where is he now?” Fern asked. “He didn’t leave you alone, did he?”
“He needed the toilet bush.”
All four women grimaced at that.
“I can’t believe you have to pee outside. That’s barbaric,” Tina said with an irritated head shake.
“How much longer does he want to stay there?” Libby asked. She had taken the call in the alleyway behind the restaurant and was in her chef’s whites.
Tina and Beth were both in their offices and Fern had been studying.
“He said a week.” Kenny couldn’t keep the panic from her voice.
All four women voiced loud protests at that.
“You said you guys were working on communicating more, right?” Fern asked, her quiet voice silencing the others. Over the last couple of days, while Smith had been out communing with nature and attempting—unsuccessfully—to fish, Kenny had confided a great deal to the other women.
Kenny clamped her lips between her teeth and nodded. She knew where Fern was going with this.
“Keeping it from him that you’re not enjoying yourself is doing you both a disservice, Kenny,” Fern said.
Kenny nodded. “I know. You’re right. I’ll talk to him. He’s just so…happy here.”
“And you’re not,” Beth said, her voice sympathetic.
“That’s important too. You each can have things you enjoy that the other doesn’t.
That’s normal. Your crazy brother, for example, loves paintballing.
I tried it once and will never again. I’m happy for him to go off and get himself bruised up with our friends, while I stay home with a good book. ”
Her friends all nodded in agreement. Kenny smiled. She felt a thread of warmth unfurl in her stomach whenever she thought of the other women as her friends. Because that’s what they were. Her friends and her sisters.
“Thank you,” she murmured, unobtrusively swiping a tear from the corner of one eye. “Hopefully the next time we talk, I’ll be back in town.”
Once the call ended, Kenny put the device on silent again—she was still actively avoiding her brothers’ and father’s calls and messages—and listened to the silence outside.
No, silence was the wrong word. It wasn’t ever silent here.
They were camped next to a stream, and the soothing sound of the burbling water was accompanied by bird calls, chirruping insects, the gentle susurration of the wind through the grass and the trees.
It was honestly quite beautiful…but also a little eerie.
Even so, Kenny found herself unable to fully relax. Every sound was too alien, every new animal call potentially signaling danger. Realistically, Kenny knew they were probably a lot safer up here than they would be in any town in the world, but it still unsettled her.
She exited the tent and looked around for Smith. He never went far, always within sight of camp. But a few yards downriver meant that he was definitely out of hearing range. The sound of the water drowned everything else out, allowing her to make her phone calls in relative privacy.
He was fishing a short distance away and he grinned and waved when he saw her.
She waved back before shoving her cold hands into her jacket pockets and ambling toward him.
It was a lot easier to get around lately, since her toe didn’t hurt as badly anymore.
Only mild twinges ever bothered her. But Kenny was very aware of the fact that it was nowhere near fully healed and kept it firmly strapped, wearing the boot even around camp.
Smith had been diligent about clearing even and safe paths around the campsite for her.
“Any luck?” she asked, when she was just a few feet away from him.
“Not at all. I told you I’m a shitty fisherman. Did you have a good nap?”
“Hmm,” she responded noncommittally. He’d set up two camping chairs and she took the one next to his. She picked up the thermos on the ground between the chairs and poured herself a cup of black coffee.
“Next time we come here, when your foot is completely healed, we can go to my favorite campsite. It’s harder to reach and we can’t navigate that trail now.
N, not with your injured toe. But it’s even more beautiful than this spot.
And I can’t wait to take you up to that ridge over there.
The views are spectacular.” He pointed toward an outcropping off in the distance and everything in Kenny recoiled at the thought of ever trekking up to that godforsaken rock over stony paths and up steep hills and…
Ugh.
No.
“Smith…”
He gave her an easy, curious smile, waiting for her to continue. Kenny pursed her lips and took another sip of the too bitter coffee and then let it all out on a single breath.
“It’sreallybeautifulupherebutIjustdon’tthinkcampingisforme.”
A tiny divot appeared between his straight brows as he tried to decipher the stream of words.
“Oh,” he finally said after an excruciatingly long pause. “Well, why didn’t you say something sooner, sweetheart? We could’ve left yesterday.”
She blinked at him in confusion.
Wait…was that it?
“You’re not disappointed?” she asked and he shrugged, looking remarkably unperturbed.
“I mean, sure, but it’s not the end of the world. Camping and hiking aren’t for everyone.”
His eyes were serious and his voice gruff when he added, “You not liking camping isn’t the problem here, Kenna. How long have you been miserable?”
“I’m not miserable,” she denied weakly and his gaze remained steady on her face, clearly telling her he didn’t believe her. She shut her eyes for a moment. “Since we arrived.”
“Three days, and you didn’t think you could tell me how you felt?” The disappointment in his voice, on his face, gutted her. “We said we weren’t going to do this anymore.”
“I know,” she whispered. “I’m sorry. You just seemed so happy and I didn’t want to ruin that.”
“My happiness doesn’t supersede yours.” The words brought tears to her eyes.
“I know that,” she whispered. “It just took me three days to figure it out. And, if it’s any consolation, last year I would simply have bottled it up and not revealed any aspect of how I felt to you. So…yay? Progress?”
She’d hoped to coax a smile from him, but he didn’t say anything. His eyes did soften, and he closed the distance between the chairs to clasp her hand in his.
They sat like that for a long time, holding hands while watching the stream bubbling merrily by.
Absolute silence between them.
It could have been a perfect moment, only Kenny wasn’t sure if it was a happy silence or a sad one.