12. Rex
TWELVE
REX
Abigail was gone by the time I finished up with the sink, and then there was a lot of jostling and movement to get Blair, Donny, and me showered and ready for the day. Gabe took off for Sullivan’s, a bar in town he managed and bartended, and I promised to see him there in an hour to watch the game.
As I slipped my shoes on, Blair was setting up in the living room to film something for her social media channel. Abigail still wasn’t back. Donny, the last to shower, walked down the stairs and nodded at me.
“You want to come watch the game at Sullivan’s?” I asked, half expecting Donny to refuse. He always seemed to have a reason not to speak to me these days, and it sucked that this is what our relationship had come to.
He surprised me by glancing into the living room at his soon-to-be wife, then hurrying across toward me. “Why not?” he said with a small smile, then called out, “Blair-bear, I’ll be back in a couple of hours! Going out with my brother. ”
“Fine. But I need you back here for some photos of the venue during the golden hour tonight.”
“Yep,” Donny said, then gave me an impish grin like he was doing something naughty and followed me out the door.
Sullivan’s was a ten-minute drive away, so we hopped in my truck.
“You’re still driving this thing, huh?” Donny said, grinning, while I turned the key in the ignition. “I’m surprised it’s still running.”
“Don’t listen to him,” I said to the truck, patting the dash. “He doesn’t know what he’s talking about.”
Donny snorted and glanced out the window. “It’s wild being back here. Everything is just…the same.”
You aren’t , I thought, but I didn’t have the guts to say it out loud. “New Elwood isn’t quite as glitzy as San Antonio, huh?”
“It’s not just that.” Donny was silent for a moment, then added, “I guess I was so focused on football for so many years, and I got swept away into that life. And now…” He rubbed his knee absentmindedly.
“Now it’s gone?” I asked quietly.
Donny chewed his lip and nodded. “Now it’s gone.”
“But the physio said there’s a chance you’ll play again, right? Didn’t you tell me it was half a year of rehab and then you’d be back out there?”
“I’m a nearly-thirty-year-old with a bum knee, man. Nobody wants me anymore,” Donny said, trying to make it sound like a joke and failing miserably.
I pulled up outside of Sullivan’s and cut the engine. Not knowing what to say, I followed my brother into the restaurant, noticing that he still walked with a slight limp. We took a seat at the bar and waved at Gabe, who was pouring a beer for an old regular at the other end of the smooth, polished timber surface.
“Seems like this social media thing with Blair is going well,” I said to Donny as we waited, wanting to break the silence that had settled between us.
He tore his gaze from the TV and looked at me, sadness in his eyes. That’s when I realized the game on the TVs was the San Antonio Stallions vs. the Columbus Bulldogs. Donny would’ve been out there if he hadn’t hurt his knee. He nodded. “Yeah. She’s really good at it.”
“I’m happy for you,” I said.
Donny studied my face. “Yeah?”
“Yeah.”
“I thought you might be uncomfortable with the way things went down. I wasn’t sure…”
“If I would ever be normal with you again?”
Donny huffed. “Something like that.”
I shrugged. “Blair always wanted things I couldn’t give her. We never would’ve worked out. You guys make more sense.”
“She makes me want things other than football. And with my knee, that’s a good thing.”
“Donny Montgomery?” a male voice called out. We turned to see Mayor Greene ambling toward us, arms wide. “Our hometown hero is back! Let me buy you a drink!”
Behind Mayor Green, a couple of council people followed. They crowded around us, slapping Donny on the back. My brother would’ve basked in the praise a few years ago. He loved being the star quarterback in New Elwood, loved the attention his draft into the NFL had given him.
He didn’t look like he was loving it now .
Gabe came closer, putting a drink in front of me and another in front of Donny. The hubbub lasted until Mayor Green was called to another table to shake hands and kiss proverbial babies. Donny slumped beside me.
“You good?”
He shook his head. “Doesn’t feel the same when I might never play again.”
My chest ached. This was my little brother, the guy I’d vowed to always take care of. I couldn’t fix his knee for him, but maybe I could make sure his wedding went off without a hitch. He needed to let off some steam. That’s why, when Sebastian arrived wearing drywall dust and work boots, I nudged my old friend in the ribs.
“You still got that sledgehammer going back at your place?”
Sebastian grinned. “Why? Is Abigail around? I can hide it if so.”
I laughed, but discomfort squirmed through me. Abigail had been a little, shall we say, enthusiastic with the sledgehammer the other day. But she wasn’t a menace to society, or anything.
I thought about the jokes I’d cracked with Gabe about her tools and winced. I’d judged her harshly too, and I’d played into the image of her I’d always known. But the tough, take-no-shit woman I thought I knew had hidden layers.
I wanted to discover them all.
There was just one problem. Gabe leaned against the bar across from us and greeted Sebastian, asking him how his renovations were going.
I couldn’t discover Abigail’s hidden layers, because my best and oldest friend would kill me. He’d nearly throttled me for being in her bathroom without a shirt on.
Tuning back into the conversation, I slapped Donny on the back. “I think my brother needs to let off some steam,” I said to Sebastian. “If you’ve got more demolition to do, Donny’s your guy.”
“Hell yeah!” Sebastian said. “We’re demoing Albert’s old apartment downstairs. Going for an open-plan kind of layout, and we need to knock down all those walls.”
Donny straightened, glancing once at his old team on the TV, then back at Sebastian. “I could use a little pressure release right now.”
I grinned. It felt good to see Donny brightening, to know that I could still take care of my little brother. This was the way things were meant to be. The people I cared about could rely on me.
When Donny and Sebastian left to go knock down old walls, Gabe meandered back to my end of the bar and leaned his elbows on the wooden surface. He watched me for a moment, then said, “You were serious about this thing with my sister being fake, right?”
I paused for a bare second, but it was long enough for Gabe to narrow his eyes. Hurrying to cover up for my hesitation, I grinned at him. “She’s just doing me a favor, man.”
“Good.”
“Why good?”
Gabe leaned his palms against the bar, frowning at me. “Why is it good that you and Abigail aren’t actually dating?”
I shrugged. “Yeah. I mean, we’re not teenagers anymore. She’s been divorced for a while. You still on that overprotective bullshit?”
“Are you saying you want to date my sister? ”
If I’d had the courage to be honest—to him and to myself—I might’ve said yes. I might’ve admitted that I liked the way she teased me, that I enjoyed making her laugh. I might’ve told Gabe that his sister deserved someone to treat her right, for once.
And she didn’t make me feel like I had to hold her world together. I could be around her and exist, and I was good enough just by being who I was. No one else made me feel that way.
But what came out was a snort and a, “Nah. I’m just saying, your sister’s going to date again eventually.”
“Yeah, but she’s not going to date you .”
I threw my hands up. “I’m just saying.”
“Saying what, though?”
I didn’t know. But as Gabe watched me, I knew that I couldn’t do anything to hurt him.
Gabe had been my best friend since we were in middle school. After Sebastian—my childhood best friend—left town as a kid, Gabe had stepped in, and we’d been tight ever since. He’d been there for me when my dad died, when I had to run around keeping the family afloat. Much like Abigail, with Gabe I could just be . I couldn’t pay that back by telling him I was into his sister.
I wasn’t the type of guy who hurt the people I cared about. If someone needed to sacrifice to make sure that the other ended up happy, I was the one who’d go without. It wasn’t because I enjoyed being noble and selfless; it was because that was the way I was wired.
Yes, sometimes I wished that someone would take care of me. Sometimes I wanted to be seen, to feel like I was worthy of effort.
But that just wasn’t the way things were.
Gabe was my best friend. He’d been there for me for decades. I would always put that ahead of my own selfish desires.
But later, when I went back to Abigail’s and heard her voice floating down the hallway toward me, I couldn’t help the relief that swept through me at being able to see her again.