Epilogue #2
I’m so far back, it’s hard to hear the words they say to each other. But I don’t need to. Their body language says it all.
Discreetly, I reach up and wipe my eyes.
They’re already sore. But I can’t stop the tears that well in them.
I guess I should just be grateful that these ones have at least a little happiness mixed in.
My plan is to escape before the bride and groom turn to make their exit, but I’m too slow, and as the officiant announces them husband and wife, I realize I’ve missed my chance to escape and return to the safety of my hotel room.
Despite what my friends think, I got back to LA yesterday afternoon.
I even showed up at Parker and Linc’s building. I just…I never got out of the car.
I couldn’t. As much as I wanted to see them all, feel the familiarity of being surrounded by my hockey family, I couldn’t face them. Not when they didn’t know the truth.
It ripped me apart telling Bea, and I know she’s told Rett. But other than that, I can only assume that she’s kept her word. I’m not sure if I’m relieved or disappointed. At least if she had told them all, it wouldn’t be this big secret. I could slip back in as if everything was normal.
No. That’s not possible. Nothing is ever going to be normal again.
I try to make myself as small as possible, which is a pretty big feat considering I’m a six-foot-four defenseman.
By some miracle, it works, though, and despite the certainty that I’m about to be spotted and all my lies are going to come crashing down around my feet, everyone is too distracted to so much as glance my way.
I stay in my hiding spot while the sound of everyone’s happiness and laughter just outside the main doors filters down to me.
I wish I could feel even the tiniest bit of it, but the truth is that even on two of my friends’ happiest of days, there is no light inside me. Instead, all I feel is the agonizing weight of grief and sadness that presses down so hard on my shoulders, it threatens to consume me.
I knew it was going to be bad. But all these years knowing it was coming, I thought I was somewhat prepared. Turns out, nothing can prepare you for your life as you know it ending.
Time passes slowly, but despite the voices I can still hear, I know I need to move.
I’ve been lucky not to be caught, but that luck can only last so long.
My heart is in my throat as I slip from my hiding place and rush around the perimeter of the room in the opposite direction to everyone else.
I figure I can slip out and then right into the stairwell opposite, so I can skulk back to my room.
Pulling the door open, I poke my head out and look toward the bar. Just like I suspected, everyone is engaged in various conversations; no one is aimlessly gazing down the hallway.
Closing my eyes, I count to three and then dart across the hallway.
As the door falls closed behind me, the voices float off to nothing, and I breathe a sigh of relief as I begin to climb the stairs.
With each step, my muscles relax.
But then, my world comes crashing down around my feet when a familiar voice floats up the stairwell.
“Hayden?”
My teeth clench and my fists curl.
If I were going to get caught by anyone today, why couldn’t it have been Bea or Rett? Why did it have to be her?
I hang my head, my steps slowing to a stop.
I’m pretty confident I could outrun her, especially in those heels. But that’ll only make this worse.
“Hayden, wait,” she calls again when I don’t say anything.
Her heels tap against the stairs as she runs up.
As she emerges, I’m struck by just how beautiful she is, just like I was on the very first day I met her.
She’s tiny and, well…perfect.
She looks delicate and gentle, and I remember being lured in by that false sense of security, even though there is nothing gentle about the way she bosses hockey players around on a daily basis. This woman is fierce and strong, and utterly incredible.
Did I mention that she’s also hot? Like the hottest woman I’ve ever seen in my life, and I can’t help but feel like a teenager with a crush whenever we’re in the same room.
“Everyone was waiting for you and—” Her words cut off as her eyes connect with mine.
I have no idea what she can see, but from the way her smile drops and her brows furrow, I really wish she couldn’t.
“What’s wrong?” she asks.
It’s such an innocent question. One I should be able to cope with.
Maybe if anyone else asked me, I’d be able to shrug it off with yet another lie and move on.
But not her.
Never her.
Instead, the most embarrassing thing happens.
A loud sob rips from my throat, and my vision blurs as tears fill my eyes.
“Oh shit. Hayden, what—”
“My sister,” I blurt, the words spilling free without permission. “She…she died.”
Suddenly, I’m engulfed by a small set of arms and held tightly as the one woman who wants to see me for more than I am encourages me to let it all out.
I was wrong earlier.
Hiding behind a plant at my friends’ wedding wasn’t my lowest point.
This is.
Falling apart in the arms of my PR Director, a woman I’ve been low key obsessed with since the very first time I walked into the front office at the Vipers arena. But that is exactly what happens.