Chapter 16
Eliza
Word of my relationship has spread through the entire office by the time I arrive the next day. People are looking at me differently, and people who have never spoken to me outside of work necessities are waving at me and saying good morning.
I make my way to my small office, shove my purse in my desk drawer, and slump in my chair.
The reason I organized my office the way I did is because the monitors block the view through the window to rest of the office, meaning people can’t see when I slouch like I am right now.
I take a few deep breaths and sit up to check my email.
As I’m reading an email from my boss, there’s a knock on my office door. I look up, and our receptionist is standing in my doorway holding a vase with a bouquet.
She grins. “You’ve had a delivery.” She places the vase on my desk and hovers as I grab the little white card tucked in between some flowers.
Thank you for yesterday.
- Mac
I can’t help the smile that over takes my face. I stick my nose in the flowers and inhale. They’re a gorgeous arrangement, and it’s huge. There’s barely enough room on my desk beside my computer it takes up so much space.
“Thanks for bringing these in, Tiffany.”
“Are they from your boyfriend?”
I tuck the card into my purse and nod. “Yeah, they are.”
My entire body floods with heat. None of the guys I’ve gone on dates with have brought me flowers, let alone flowers this nice, and Mac bought me flowers before our first date.
He has me thinking about what it would be like years down the road if we were actually dating, but I give my head a shake and return to work.
I have trouble focusing. My mind keeps wandering back to thoughts of Mac, and they either have me blushing or smiling like a fool.
I know I’m going to see him tomorrow night at his game, but I’m also tempted to text him and see if he wants to have dinner tonight.
I push that thought aside and manage to get through my work day.
As I’m packing up, Hannah texts me and asks if I’m free for dinner. I immediately accept, glad for a reason to distract myself tonight.
Hannah and I meet at a restaurant between both of our places. She’s already there when I arrive, and she stands and hugs me when I approach the table. As I slide into the booth across from her, she jumps right into it.
“So, how are things with Mac?”
I bite my lip trying to stop my grin, but it’s no use.
“Oh, so it’s that good.”
“It’s not what you think. We’ve just been spending time together.”
“In bed?” She waggles her brows in a way that is just so her.
I shake my head. “No, we’re not sleeping together. We’re getting to know each other before anything else.”
Her shoulders fall, and she pouts at me. “Why not? I bet you guys would have so much fun.”
I’ve started to notice my skin crawls less at the mention of sex now.
It used to be at any mention of it, I would want to curl in on myself, but now it’s more of a slightly uncomfortable feeling.
Mentions of my own sex life are more uncomfortable than those of my friends, but I’ve noticed my own growth around the subject.
I take a long sip of water, trying to push this feeling away. I want to be able to talk to my friends. Not because I need them to know everything, but because I love and trust them and I don’t want this feeling of unease to hit me every time the topic comes up.
“We’re taking it slow,” I say, hoping that will satiate her.
She nods. “I just hope you’re not shying away from what you want,” she says. “I know how insular you can be, don’t let that stop you from going for more with Mac.”
Leaving it at that, she doesn’t push any more.
She asks me about my parents, who I’ve barely talked to in the last few weeks.
She knows I didn’t remain super close with my parents after high school.
We slowly grew apart as they made clear they didn’t agree with some of my choices.
I still love them, but we no longer share some of the same beliefs and it’s strained our relationship.
Hannah catches me up about her life, work at the hospital, her and Grayson, and her in-laws.
I’ve never seen her as happy as she is now with Grayson, and to think it all happened because they drunkenly got married in Vegas.
I listen to everything Hannah says. She luckily keeps my mind off of Mac, but when we’re leaving, my mind is right back on him.
“You’re thinking about him, aren’t you?” she asks.
I blush, and that’s all the confirmation she needs.
“You seem happy,” she muses.
That turns my stomach, because I am happy, but what’s going to happen in five months when this ends?
“Are you guys doing anything for Valentine’s Day?” she asks, and I freeze in place. Valentine’s Day is for real couples, not whatever Mac and I are. We shouldn’t do anything. We should spend the day apart, doing our own things.
“I’m not sure yet,” I say. “What about you and Grayson?”
“We’ve got reservations and then a night in planned.”
I know exactly what she means when she says a night in. I’m sure she’ll have stories the next time we see her.
“Mac hasn’t asked you about it yet?”
I shake my head. “It hasn’t come up. It’s still two weeks away.”
“If he doesn’t ask, you should.”
“Nope. You might be a grab the bull by the horns girl when it comes to dating, I am not.”
“Oh, come on. You’re already dating, why can’t you just ask him?”
“Because if he wanted to do something, he’d ask.”
Hannah rolls her eyes and shakes her head. “Fuck the patriarchy and this men should ask bullshit. You’re a strong independent woman. Ask the man.”
I tighten my jacket around myself as a crisp breeze comes through.
“I agree, fuck the patriarchy, but also, no, I’m not going to just ask him.
I don’t even know if I want to spend one of the most commercialized days out in public full of other people throwing money at corporations who are just looking to make a profit. It’s not even an actual holiday.”
“Okay, no need to get your panties in a twist,” she says, holding her hands up.
I sigh, and my shoulders fall. “Sorry, it’s just been a weird day.”
“It’s okay, babe. I just want you to be happy.”
“I know. I should get home and get some sleep.”
We hug, and she squeezes me just a little tighter than earlier.
“I’ll see you tomorrow,” she says as we part.
I wave and start heading to my apartment.
It was such a big step for me just kissing Mac, but that was different.
Sex is part of our deal, spending time together for a holiday that celebrates love and couples is not part of that deal.
I wish I was as brave as Hannah and could just ask for what I want, even though I know the likelihood of me getting it is next to none.