Chapter 21
I’m covered from head to toe in flour, but I haven’t stopped smiling in three hours, so I’m not even upset about it. Gramma Grace and I have been baking bread and cookies for the upcoming farmer’s market. The retreat hosts a booth once a month and lures them over with fresh-smelling baked goods.
“Who runs the booth?” I ask her.
“Usually, one of the receptionists or a staff member from The Lodge.”
“When it’s not too hot out, I’ll take her and we’ll join in for a few hours,” Mrs. Hollis adds.
“That sounds fun. Can I go next time?” I ask, washing my hands in the sink.
“Of course. We can go this weekend. Drag that fiancé of yours with us, too.” Gramma Grace snickers and my cheeks heat at the mention of him.
Although we’re not engaged, Gramma Grace enjoys teasing us about it. She offers me her old ring at least three times a week.
I’ve been getting cooking lessons from Gramma Grace and Mrs. Hollis for the past two weeks. Since I’m still not cleared to drive, Landen picks me up on his morning break at nine to take me to his parents’ house, and then he stops in for lunch to taste test anything we’ve made. Although we don’t get to spend much alone time together during the week, I still love getting to see him when I can. For the past two Friday and Saturday nights, I stayed later so we could hang out at his house and mostly fooled around. Though we’ve not gone past making out and over the clothes touching. He’s still worried I’m going to wake up one day and hate his guts again.
But the longer I go without remembering, the less likely I’ll remember them at all.
And I’ve decided I’m okay with that. I’ve never felt happier.
In the afternoons, I visit him at the stud farm, and then my dad picks me up when he’s done at work so I’m home for dinner by five. Aunt Phoebe asks me each night what new recipe I learned and we talk all about it until dessert.
It’s a new and different routine than I’m used to, but I’m still enjoying it. It allows me to visit Ranger every day and groom him so he doesn’t get sad or lonely. I watch Noah train him so he stays ready for when I can ride him. For the past few days, she’s let me lunge him in the corral. She was worried I’d get too dizzy, but so far, I haven’t.
After rumors spread that Landen and I were engaged, we didn’t say anything publicly about it, so it was neither confirmed nor denied. It’s not a huge deal since we’re dating anyway.
When I explained everything to my parents about Gage, Dad fired him, and we filed a police report. I didn’t think we needed to go to that extreme, but everyone else insisted.
My family knows Landen and I are dating, and even though my mom is happy I’m finally getting out of the house and having a social life, my dad warns me to be careful. He thinks because Landen’s older and at a different season of his life than me that he’ll be a distraction from focusing on my career when I can return.
But after reassuring him that barrel racing is still my priority, he’s come around more to the idea. He thinks I’m going to get hurt, but I’m an adult, so he needs to let me make my own decisions even if I do end up with a broken heart.
Landen walks in around noon, scoops me in his arms, and plants a deep kiss on my lips.
“Oh my God, you smell so bad.” I push away before my eyes start watering.
“Yeah, I fell in some horse shit.”
“Landen!” Shoving at his chest, he releases me, and I step backward. “You’re gonna pay for that.”
He flashes me a wicked smile and goes to wash his hands.
“Oh, you’re gonna have to get used to that, sweetie,” Gramma Grace enters the kitchen and then refills her glass. She and Mrs. Hollis took a lunch break on the back patio to drink sweet tea and read their books.
I make a face and she laughs. “Figured you’d be immune to that smell by now.”
“Not when it’s injected into my nostrils.” I wrinkle my nose.
Gramma Grace excuses herself and returns outside.
“How’re things goin’ today?” I ask Landen as he dries off his hands. “Watchin’ lots of horse sex?”
“Yep, just another day of breedin’ season.”
Landen removes his baseball cap and then does the hottest thing I’ve ever witnessed. He reaches behind his neck and pulls off his T-shirt in one smooth motion. He uses it to wipe his face and over his hair before he puts his hat back on, backward.
My gaze drops to his chest and abs. Hard muscles line every inch of him. A six-pack I want to trace with my tongue. And a thin happy trail that leads below his shorts.
Why is the first time I see my boyfriend half naked in the middle of his parents’ kitchen?
That should be a crime.
A throat clearing grabs my attention, and I snap my focus back to Landen’s face.
“What?”
“I saw that.”
I scratch my cheek, furrowing my brows. “I have no idea what you’re talkin’ about.”
“That was one helluva eye fuck if I’ve ever seen one.”
With both hands on my hips, I scowl. “To be fair…you’ve been holdin’ out on me.”
He closes the gap between us, tilting up my chin. “And you’ve been such a good girl waitin’ so patiently for our first date.”
“You love to torture me, don’t you?”
He knows exactly what he’s doing by calling me a good girl. He says it every time I sit in his lap and get him hard, then he tells me to finish on his cowboy hat.
“Only five more days, Little Devil.” He winks. “And then I promise to give you anything you need.”
Curiously, I arch a brow. “Anything?”
He leans in and presses a quick kiss to my lips. “Anything.”
My chest aches with anticipation of getting to touch him. Although it’s only been a month, it seems so much longer with the intense feelings I have for him.
“Are you gonna tell me what we’re doing for our first date?” I wrap my arms around his neck and pull him closer.
He grasps my hips. “Nope. But wear comfortable clothes.”
“That’s not helpful at all.”
He captures my mouth again and teases me with his tongue. “You’re going to love it, I promise.”
After we eat lunch together, and I’m home for the night, I help my mom with cleaning up the kitchen and catch her up on my day.
“I’ll have to stop by the farmer’s market and grab some bread. It sounds delicious,” she says.
“It is. If you can’t make it, though, I’ll save you a loaf. I’m gonna work the booth this Saturday,” I tell her as I organize a pile of mail.
A letter catches my eye when I see it’s addressed to Aunt Phoebe. But the odd part is the return label says it’s from the Nashville Women’s Prison.
“Mom, what’s this?” I hold it up for her and when she turns to see, her eyes widen in panic.
“Nothin’, sweetie. I screen all of Aunt Phoebe’s mail so she doesn’t get any scammers.” She reaches for it as I study the handwriting and a wave of déjà vu hits me.
“Who would be writing?—”
“Just a pen pal, sweetheart.”
“Oh…okay.” I hand it over, wondering why a weird feeling overcame me.
I could ask Aunt Phoebe about it, but I don’t think Mom gives her those letters.
Ever since my accident, Aunt Phoebe doesn’t say much to me and now that I’m spending less time at home, there aren’t as many opportunities to talk to her when she’s in a good mental state.
Keeping to my evening routine, I clean up after dinner, put a load of laundry in, and then wait for Landen to FaceTime me. We don’t stay up too late since he gets up early for work, and I still require eight hours of sleep to keep up with my routine.
Landen
I’m gonna shower quickly, and then I’ll call you.
After seeing him half-naked earlier, I’m feeling a little brave.
Ellie
Or you could call me while you’re in the shower…give me a preview of what you’re keeping hostage.
Landen
I knew it, you only want me for my body.
Ellie
Yep, you caught me. Now strip.
Landen
I’m more than just a piece of meat, you know?
Ellie
Yeah, you have a fierce tongue, too.
Landen
You’re gonna get me all worked up, and I won’t be able to jerk off in the shower if you’re watching.
The ache between my thighs pulses through me at the mental visual. I’ve touched myself every night before bed since the first time we kissed, so I’m desperate to see how he does it.
Ellie
Why not? I want to see.
Landen
You’re being serious?
Ellie
Yes! And then I’ll show you how I touch myself…
Two and a half seconds later, his call comes through.
When I hit accept, he’s already naked in the shower.
My jaw drops as I take in every wet, bare inch of him.
“You’re a tease,” he says.
“Me? Look who’s talkin’.” I angle my screen and look down into it as if I’ll be able to see more of him.
“You touch yourself thinkin’ about me?” he asks, rubbing soap over his arms and chest.
“Well, duh. You’ve been blue-ballin’ me for almost a month.”
“You don’t have balls, so that’s scientifically inaccurate.”
“Okay, smart-ass. Blue…whatever the equivalent is for a woman.”
He chuckles, my frustration clearly amusing him. “I think the term is blue bean.”
“Is it? Okay, well, then my bean is blue. Very, very blue.”
“Then you should do something about that…take off your panties, and I’ll talk you through it.”
I slowly blink, shocked at how quickly and easily he suggested that, and also hating how red my face is when I’m the one who started this. My previous sexual experiences were mediocre and not very memorable.
But if it isn’t the consequences of my own actions kicking me in the blue bean.
“Ellie…”
His deep drawl snaps me out of my trance.
“Remove your panties for me and get under the covers.”
Swallowing hard, I focus on his voice and the motion of his arm that’s moving below the screen.
He’s already stroking his cock.
Standing, I lower my shorts and panties before sliding back into bed. I’m an expert at pleasing myself considering my embarrassing dating life, but I have no doubt that Landen Hollis talking me through it will beat every other time I’ve done it on my own.
“Now tell me how wet you are…”
Spreading my thighs, I ease my hand between my legs and find I’m already aroused.
“I’m soaked,” I admit.
“Good, because I’m rock hard and need you to come before I do. Can you do that for me?”
Nodding, I moan at how sensitive my clit is already. I rub the pad of my fingers over it and breathe through the build-up.
“Fuck, you look so hot doing that. I bet you’re throbbin’ right now.”
“I am,” I agree. “It feels so good.”
He inhales sharply as if he’s trying to hold himself off, and I like the thought of him struggling for control.
“Imagine my hands and mouth on you, baby. Licking, sucking, devouring that sweet little pussy.”
“Oh my God, yes…” My head falls back, and I nearly drop the phone in my hand.
“Don’t lose momentum, Little Devil. I wanna hear you get yourself off.”
“I’m trying…it’s right there.”
At the sound of his nickname for me, I moan as the pleasure increases.
“I wanna watch you come, darlin’. Turn the camera around.”
Quickly pulling off the covers, I tilt the phone so he can see. Vulnerability crashes through me at how exposed I am, but his throaty groans at seeing how wet I am for him help ease some of the embarrassment.
“Spread wider, baby. Show me all of you.”
I do as he says and continue rubbing myself, the build-up getting more intense and stronger.
“Look at that pretty little cunt. All mine, baby. I’m gonna devour you.”
“God, yes. I’m so close.” I’m breathing so hard, I sound like a panting dog, but I don’t care. I’ve never experienced this kind of pleasure before with someone guiding me through it, but I love it.
“You’re doing so good, sweetheart. Give that needy clit what it needs.”
“It needs you,” I beg, teetering on the edge.
“I’m right here.” He releases short, labored breaths and I can tell he’s barely hanging on. “Imagine my fingers deep inside you as I suck your clit.”
That picture was already in my mind, but hearing him say it aloud has me falling apart.
“Yes, Landen…”
My body stiffens and shakes as I moan through the orgasm, unraveling at how intense the pleasure rolls through me. I’ve never been able to make myself come this fast before, but hearing Landen encourage me and whisper filthy sweet nothings was enough to get me there within minutes.
“Oh my God, that was?—”
“Fuck, Ellie…”
When I watch his face tense, I know he’s shattering through his own release, and I love seeing him come undone.
“Holy shit. I couldn’t stop once I heard you,” he admits, attempting to catch his breath.
Flipping the camera around, I blush when he grins at me. “I could watch you do that for hours. That was fuckin’ hot.”
“I didn’t get to watch you, though…” I pout. “The camera wasn’t pointin’ down.”
“I know, I’m sorry. When you moaned my name, that’s all it took. I was a goner.”
Giggling, my cheeks redden, and I mentally slap myself for being so damn infatuated with him. But I can’t help it.
“I loved watchin’ you come for me. Fuck, I think I’m addicted now.”
“Adding nightly shower calls to our schedule now.”
With a grin, he nods. “Deal.”
Landen continues rinsing off his body and lets me stay on the call to stare at him. I admire his broad back, hoping I get to wrap my legs around his shoulders one day. I’ve only experienced that once and it felt more uncomfortable than pleasurable, but I have a feeling Landen wouldn’t stop until he had me screaming.
After I’ve cleaned up myself, I dress into lounge clothes and crawl back into bed. He’s long dried off and changed into boxers and a T-shirt, which he let me help pick out.
“I miss hearin’ you read to me and Ranger,” I say, my eyes struggling to stay awake.
“You liked that, huh?”
“You have a sexy reading voice.”
“Do you want me to read to you now so you can sleep?”
“You’d do that?” I ask, knowing he needs to go to bed, too.
The corner of his lips lifts into the sweetest smile. “Of course. Don’t you know by now, Ellie? I’d do pretty much anything for you.”