14. Alex
Chapter 14
Alex
Waking in Talon’s arms felt dangerously good. Sprawled across his warm chest, Alex woke from a dreamless sleep with a smile on his face. When he raised his head, Talon met his eyes with an easy smile.
“No nightmares, little bird?” he asked, thumb brushing Alex’s cheek.
He shook his head. “You didn’t make it so?”
“Nope. I confess, I was tempted to slip in, if only to pass the time.” He tapped a finger to Alex’s temple, smiling. “But I actually fell asleep, myself.”
The morning was a lazy one, lounging in bed with Talon and getting each other off once more before Alex’s alarm blared and he really did have to get up and get ready to go into HQ for the morning drills. Talon watched him dress with hooded eyes from the bed, leaning against the headboard with the soft sheet pooling in his naked lap. It was a sight he could get used to, and he was loath to turn away from it.
“What?” Talon crooned, curling an arm behind his head.
“Is it cliché of me to say you look good in my bed?”
Talon preened, sliding his free hand down his chest. “I’m glad you think so, little bird.”
Alex sighed, lingering even though he should definitely be heading to HQ right now if he wanted to get there on time and avoid Nathan’s disapproval. “What’re you going to do today?”
Talon waved a hand for him to come closer, reaching out for him and reeling him in until Alex was straddling his lap. “I’ll go home. Shower. Sleep. And wait for you to call.”
A curl of warmth went through him. “Oh?”
“Mm-hm. And the moment you do, I’ll be here.”
Alex smiled. How could a demon make him feel this way? It didn’t align with anything he’d learned about demons at the guild. Was it possible the guild had it all wrong? Or was Talon just an exception?
“Then as soon as I’m free, I’ll call,” he said, letting his body mold to Talon’s, brushing his mouth in a barely-there kiss. “I’m going to lock up when I leave, since I assume you’re just going to do that disappearing thing. Feel free to stay as long as you’d like.”
“Do you have a knife I can use? Preferably one that won’t burn me?” It was a strange question, given that Talon’s head was angled back as though waiting for another kiss.
Alex paused, blinking at him in confusion. “Yeah. Why?”
A hand curled around the back of his head, drawing him into a deep kiss before Talon answered. “Your wards are lacking, little bird. A demon like me can walk right past them. I’ll put something stronger on your door and windows before I leave. It means you’ll have to invite me back across the threshold, but that’s a small price to pay for your safety.”
“Oh. And the knife is for…”
“I have to etch the markings into the frame. They’re small, though. I can hide them in the grooves of the wood.”
He definitely wouldn’t get his deposit back if the landlord noticed them, but like Talon said, it was a small price to pay for guaranteed safety. He didn’t want any other demons sneaking into his apartment, after all.
“Okay, yeah. There’s a knife in the bedside table there.”
“Good, thank you.”
Alex groaned. “I really have to go now.”
Talon hummed, reeling him in for one last kiss. “Okay. Go do paladin things, I guess .”
Reluctantly, Alex peeled himself away from Talon and stood, tucking his phone in his pocket and pointedly refusing to let himself look back as he strode from the room. He would see Talon again soon, and in the meantime, he had work to do.
Outside, the sky was overcast, a sheet of white blocking out the sun as he drove to HQ. His body was moving forward, but his mind was still back in the apartment with Talon. He’d never disliked training drills or patrolling with his squad. Killing demons was what he’d wanted to do all his life, but now he had something new to look forward to, something that tore his attention from his work. He and Talon had barely begun whatever this was. Would it get easier to be away from him in time, or would he always feel tugged in opposite directions?
He pulled up in the parking lot and made his way toward the training yard. The best thing he could do was focus on the present. He could see Talon again tonight, but he had to act normal while he was here. If anyone found out he was seeing someone, they’d want to know who, and he wanted to avoid telling any more lies than absolutely necessary.
Before he reached his destination, Nathan intercepted him on the gravel path, jogging up and falling into step with him. “Paladin Hawk, Commander Sloan wants a word with you.”
Low-grade panic pulsed through him. Did they know? He didn’t dare reach up to the bite mark on his shoulder. It should be hidden by his collar, but drawing attention to it would surely be worse.
“What? Why?” It was a struggle to keep his voice calm.
Nathan shrugged one shoulder. He didn’t seem alarmed by Alex’s reaction, which at least told him he’d hidden his panic well enough. “He didn’t say. He requested I be there, as well.”
Clammy sweat prickled along Alex’s spine. Nathan led him through the admin building’s long halls. It was bustling with activity, still early enough for a lot of traffic going to and from the cafeteria. Maxwell’s medical facility in the back part of the building also saw a pretty regular amount of traffic. He handled most of their medical needs—provided they didn’t need anything extensive. Regular checkups, illnesses, and emergency care was handled on-site by Maxwell and his small staff. The last case he didn’t handle himself had been a schoolteacher’s leukemia diagnosis ten years ago, and she’d been in remission for seven years now.
Commander Derek Sloan’s office was located on the second floor with windows that overlooked the training yard. The door was open, so Nathan knocked on the frame. Sloan was a big man, over six feet tall and built like a powerlifter. He was less imposing behind his desk and the mountain of paperwork piled atop it. His brown hair, cut high and tight like most paladins, had a dusting of gray throughout, and his ice blue eyes regarded Alex with a carefully neutral gaze as he followed Nathan into the quiet office.
“Captain Accardi, Paladin Hawk, please come in. Have a seat.”
Alex sat stiffly in one of the cold leather chairs, and Nathan took the other.
Sloan sat back in his chair, steepling his fingers and looking between them. “I called you in here, Captain, because I’ve received word from one of our field agents that Paladin Hawk was seen entering the demon club, In Extremis, two nights ago.”
Nathan’s eyes burned into his profile, and Alex looked down at his lap. Oh God, how much did they know? That was the night he’d been too exhausted to fight the pull to Talon anymore. He barely remembered the drive to the club. If they saw him beeline to Talon and crawl into his lap…
“I believe he’s searching for the pentagram killer on his own.”
“Alex, is this true?” Nathan asked.
Relief and dread roiled nauseatingly within him. They didn’t know about Talon. Maybe he could still salvage this. He mustered his voice. “What I do in my free time?—”
“Is still our business if you’re putting your life in danger,” Sloan said bluntly.
Alex clenched his jaw. “I didn’t put my life in danger.”
“You were taught—every recruit is taught—not to go to places like that without backup. What if they’d overwhelmed you? You were outnumbered and surrounded and none of us would’ve known how to find you if something went wrong.”
He thought of Talon’s warm fingers tracing his spine this morning. “That didn’t happen.”
“Yet. But it might if you keep going down this path. Vengeance is a slippery slope, Paladin Hawk. You are clearly not objective enough about this case, just as I suspected. You’re proving my instincts right—that you aren’t level-headed enough to handle hunting this demon.”
“I was brought to the guild with the promise of revenge,” Alex snapped, anger simmering under his skin. “I was told by the recruiter at nine years old when I was evaluated that I could kill this thing if I let the guild adopt me into the program?—”
“Oh, Paladin Hawk, please,” Sloan said dismissively. “I don’t know who your recruiter was, but they had no way of upholding a promise like that. There was a chance we would never find this demon again.”
“So they lied to me? Fed me false promises in order to get me here?” Alex demanded, clenching his hands into fists atop his thighs.
Beside him, Nathan raised a calming hand, but before he could speak, Sloan said, “False promises? Are you so mistreated, Paladin Hawk? We fed you, clothed you, sheltered you, taught you the ways of God, and trained you to be a hero to mankind. Do all your accomplishments here mean nothing because I’ve denied you one thing?”
Alex’s mouth twisted, and he swallowed back all the acidic things he wished to say. No amount of arguing would make a difference. Sloan would not be swayed, and the more Alex resisted, the worse his punishment would be.
“Answer my question, Paladin Hawk,” Sloan insisted.
He sighed. Talon’s face entered his mind, smiling and content just like he had been when Alex left the apartment earlier. All he had to do was get through this conversation, and then he could go back home to Talon’s arms.
“What kind of hero can’t avenge his family?” Alex asked weakly.
Sloan shook his head. “You’ve saved countless lives already, Hawk. Isn’t that the important thing? You’ve been in the field for four years now. How many demons have you personally slain?”
Alex didn’t reply, so Sloan whipped open a file folder on his desk.
“I’ll tell you. Eighty-two. You’ve killed eighty-two demons on patrols with your squad in the last four years. That’s an exceptional record. There are paladins with twice your field time with only half that number. Is that not enough?” His glare was as sharp as broken glass, and Alex didn’t miss the warning in it.
He wanted to hear Alex agree with him. Alex wouldn’t be allowed to leave until he bowed. Blinking away the burning in his eyes, he swallowed back bile and nodded.
“Yes, sir,” he croaked. “You’re right. I’m sorry.” The words cut his tongue on their way out.
Sloan’s ice-blue eyes didn’t warm, but they brightened with triumph. “Good. It’s important that we respect the chain of command.”
Easy to say when he was at the top.
“For your disobedience, I’m placing you on suspension for two weeks. You’ll attend squad drills as usual, but you will not be allowed on patrols. I hope you’ll take this time to think about your behavior going forward. One man cannot fight the forces of evil alone. You’ve insulted the guild and your squad with this tantrum, and it will take time to earn back our trust.”
Alex wanted to scream. He’d known suspension was a possibility if they found out he’d been hunting the demon in his free time, but it still felt like a sucker punch. “Yes, sir.”
Sloan’s level expression didn’t change. “If you’d like, you can come by and speak with Doctor Maxwell or Father Hawley. I’m sure either of them would be willing to have some sessions with you to help you through this?—”
His eyes slid to Nathan’s, remembering what he’d said about Maxwell and Hawley’s approaches to problems. He wanted Nathan, his captain, his friend , to say something on his behalf. But Nathan just met his eyes with resignation, his mouth tightening into a thin line. He would be no help here. Sloan’s word was as good as law amongst the paladins.
Alex pushed himself to his feet. “Permission to be excused, sir.”
Sloan stared at him for a long moment. He didn’t like being interrupted. “Permission granted.”
Alex turned to leave.
“And Paladin Hawk,” Sloan’s voice rang out like a struck gong, rooting Alex to the spot. “If I find out you’ve gone anywhere near that club again, I’ll double your suspension without pay. Do you understand?”
Alex glared at the wall. He didn’t need to go to the club to see Talon or to keep hunting the mozgoran. “Fine,” he groused, wrenching open the door and storming out.
How could they do this? No one was more motivated to find that demon than he was. No one else cared as much, and Michael’s team hadn’t done a damn thing to find the mozgoran. He was the one who’d found where it was nesting. He was the one who’d come so close to it. If they’d just let him go after it like he wanted, everyone would be happy. There would be one less demon in the world, and Alex would have his revenge. There were no downsides to it.
But they wanted control. They didn’t want him doing things out of turn. Did they want him to blindly follow orders? That wasn’t fair. He wasn’t a robot. If someone Sloan cared about was killed by a demon, would he step aside and let another squad handle that fight? Alex doubted it.
A powerful, aggressive stride carried him through the long hallways and down the curving staircase in the foyer. He was almost to the front door when a voice called out.
“Hawk!”
Alex paused, turning toward the voice. He recognized the man—olive-skinned and with warm brown eyes. His chocolate curls were pulled back into a bun, but several strands tumbled around his face, like he’d put it up hastily and hadn’t bothered to look in a mirror since. His name was Ira, and he was a prophet. They’d never spoken, as prophets and paladins weren’t really supposed to interact, but everyone knew everyone in the guild, and Alex knew his name and designation, if nothing else.
“It’s good to see you,” Ira said like they were old friends, but his smile was tight around the edges. He held out his hand for Alex to shake. There was a slip of paper pinched between his fingers.
Alex shook his hand slowly, clenching the paper as Ira’s hand fell away. “Nice to see you, too.”
Ira glanced around to make sure they were alone. “You will be the one to kill it. Save them. They’re what matters.”
Alex’s heart leaped. “Thank you, Ira.”
“Go tonight. Be there by sundown.”
Energy burned through Alex. “Okay, yes, I will.”
He winked one whiskey-brown eye. “I was never here,” he whispered dramatically, backing away.
Alex fought back a grin. “Right.” He shoved the paper into his pocket and rushed out into the cool morning air.
He finally had a lead.