Chapter 10
~ Troy ~
Anelise drove us home and through the whole ride, I could feel how thick the tension was. And I didn’t even do anything.
Buck was the asshole and yet I was getting the blame for it.
Did it put thoughts in my mind, sure. Like it may seem strange, I was walking into this family and already taking a shine to her daughter. But then, it wasn’t either.
And Buck was just a jerk. He was back in the day, and it didn’t seem like he changed much.
“Mommy, I tired.”
“We’re almost home baby, then you can nap. And when you wake, we can help Cook start peeling the apples, how’s that sound?”
“Yummy,” she muttered, her head already tilting to the side for a quick power nap.
“Anelise,” I started, but she just shook her head.
“It’s not you, Troy. You don’t owe me anything. Just, let me stew in my thoughts. I hated Buck, always have. That encounter sure didn’t help his case.”
“No, it didn’t. I wasn’t overly fond of him either. Neither was Markus. But Buck just sorta hung around us and no matter what we did, we couldn’t shake him.”
“I know. Just give me a bit and I’ll be okay.”
“Sure,” I offered with a nod, but it didn’t ease the atmosphere around us, which seemed to be more her doing at this point.
Twenty-five minutes later, we pulled up to her house, the air having eased somewhat. I jumped out, grabbing the barrels of apples while she grabbed MaryBeth.
“I’m going to lay her down. If you’d like, I can meet you in the barn,” she told me, and I nodded.
“These are for you, Cook,” I told the older woman, who gave me a smile.
I closed the door behind me and walked over to the barn, kicking at the rocks as I went. I could only imagine the thoughts rolling through Anelise’s mind. They weren’t pretty. Anyone could have picked up on that.
I was glad she didn’t blame me, but come on, let’s be real, she did.
“Penny for your thoughts.”
I whirled around to face her, surprised she had gotten out here so fast.
“Don’t think you want to know,” I told her, pushing back my hat slightly so I could see her better.
“Maybe I do,” she teased, jumping up and grabbing the hat right off my head. She ran through the gate and towards the barn, where I quickly caught up, and wrapped my arms around her waist, causing her to squeal.
I walked her over to the fence line where I placed her back down, both of us watching the horses working through the training. I locked my arms on either side of her, caging her within my embrace without touching her.
“I’m sorry,” she told me, fiddling with my hat before placing it on her head.
Which, damn it all to hell, we all knew what that meant. She was tempting me to claim her even more, even though she was clearly showing it right now. Sure, no one but the people on the ranch would know.
“You don’t need to be sorry, Anelise,” I told her, kissing her cheek. And she really didn’t.
“We were having a great day and then Buck came and I let it put a huge damper on the mood. Then I let it fester.”
“You don’t need to explain it, Cowgirl.”
“But I want to.”
“Anelise, listen to me. I’m not Buck. I don’t share his thoughts. He was always wanting the next fling, the loose women, basically anywhere he could stick his dick. Now, I understand, I had my share of women on the road. It’s rather hard not to.”
I didn’t mean to make her flinch. But I wasn’t about to hide the past. I didn’t have a woman in every town, but I damn near was close to it.
But that didn’t mean it was what I wanted or what I saw in my future. That’s what people didn’t get. For the time, it was just an end to a means, nothing more.
“But?” she whispered, unconsciously leaning back against me.
She was trusting me to keep her safe. Trusting me not to hurt her. Trusting me not to walk out. And I so badly wanted to keep that trust.
Was it love?
No, not there. But it was wanting more. Wanting her. And yes, wanting MaryBeth. She didn’t need a full stepdad, not that I was looking at this that way.
“But it wasn’t the beat all. I didn’t need to have a woman, Anelise. I chose to have one. But I didn’t need someone in my bed to keep me happy. I knew, someday, I’d settle down, I’d want a wife. And hopefully a family.”
“So, you’re not opposed to it?”
“No, I don’t think I am.”
I could feel her ease slightly against my body, as if it were the words she needed to hear.
“Thank you.”
“There’s no need for that, Cowgirl. I’m not perfect, I’m going to have my downfalls, I know that. But that doesn’t mean that I don’t know a good thing when I see it.”
“Are you sure you won’t tire of this town again?”
I wanted to say I was here for good. But I also knew my restless soul. I mean, sure, this was always going to be where I came back, but was I fully ready to live here? Permanently?
I could never go back to the circuit, I knew that. I’m not even sure I wanted to.
I sighed as I took my hat off her head and then rested my chin there, breathing in the scent of nature, and of her. It was a delicious smell; one I knew I’d always enjoy.
“I like to think I am here for good. Can you put up with me for that long?”
She finally turned around and looked up at me, her eyes searching my face, for what, I wasn’t sure. I tried to be as honest and open as I could with her, not wanting to hide anything.
I’m sure Markus loved that idea too. No doubt if he really could, he’d keep me away.
But I wanted to make this woman happy. It wasn’t my fault that she knocked me over sideways out of my chair and then clouded every waking thought.
She nodded, as if finding whatever answer she was seeking and then wrapped her arms around my waist, her head resting against my chest.
“Let me make it up to you,” she whispered. I kissed the top of her head as my arms encircled her body.
“How many times am I going to have to tell you to stop? You have nothing to make up for.”
“Troy,” she grumbled, and I couldn’t help but grin. “I do owe you. You were great with my daughter today, and you didn’t back down from Buck. I shouldn’t have been so off the path like I was.”
“Fine. What did you have in mind?”
“Let me take you on a date night. Something I’ve always wanted to do. And,” she started, twisting her lip.
“And what?” I coached.
“It’s something I always wanted to do with you. Will you let me do it?”
How the hell could I say no to that? I’m not sure how she tied me up like a calf to do her bidding, but I wasn’t about to stop it. I was here for the ride, whatever ride she was going to give me.
“Always,” I told her, and I meant it with every part of my body.